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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. Vaermina

    Vaermina Well worn.

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    It really doesn't... It makes you look like a tool following a prepared script...
     
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  2. Queshire

    Queshire Not too sore, are you?

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    Nah, that was too clumsy for a prepared script.
     
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  3. Mquz

    Mquz Versed in the lewd.

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    That’s not a problem. Being a tool is still a very human thing.
     
  4. FreeGod

    FreeGod If you see a God on the road fuck it!

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    Funny thing is I am actually in China right now.
     
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  5. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
    Paul the succupire. Once he was reasonably confident that the treatment was holding, Grayven adopted him and his natural siblings.
     
  6. DrThoth

    DrThoth I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Paul in a polyamorous relationship with Jade, Connor and M’gann- set about 5 years later so the latter two are more appropriately mature.
    Another ship idea I thought would be interesting is Paul and John Constantine, even before his ascension into a Lord of Chaos- their power disparity isn’t as big as Paul/Jade, though it’s hard to quantify since the natures of their powers are so different; their skill sets (hyper technology and magic) complement each other instead of one making the other fully redundant; they’re both pragmatic and willing to be ruthless when necessary, but are ultimately well-intentioned. Not all these traits are unique to the Paul/Constantine pairing, but it’s still an overall decent set-up, and story wise it would make things a lot more fun for sure, though I don’t think it’ll actually happen.
    I’m looking forward to his return and the resolution of the Golden Boy storyline though; I thought he’d show up during the Silver City episodes since that marked a whole season since he’d been on-screen and was thematically appropriate too.
     
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  7. NightmareWarden

    NightmareWarden Versed in the lewd.

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    I'm rather concerned that none of Grayven's tactful maneuvering here had any emotional coloration. He has a good enough head on his shoulders to feel such emotions without losing focus. I guess his recovery from the Anti-life fragment is slow. Poor guy.
     
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  8. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Why would it have a strong emotional resonance?
     
  9. Coda

    Coda Versed in the lewd.

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    The comma breaks the parallelism that's supposed to make the sentence say "he knows that I'm happy to butt out". As it stands, it looks like you have an extra "that" in there instead, but I don't think that was your intent.
     
  10. Nervaqus987

    Nervaqus987 Well worn.

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    They've also got Weapon X and those mutant death camps, so they still don't have much of a leg to stand on.
     
  11. Someguy Somewhere

    Someguy Somewhere The Critical Fumbler

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    Ok, you kinda got me there.

    Department H - Creation and Training for Alpha, Beta and Omega Flights. Canadian Super Hero Teams, Prisons and Support.

    Department K - Black Ops section affiliated with the Weapon X program.

    Weapon X - International Super Solider creation program, spun off from Weapon Plus Program.

    Weapon Plus Program - Starting after, and retroactively including Weapon I (aka Project Rebirth aka Captain America), a series of attempts to created Super Soldiers. Weapon X spun off from the 10th series in the program.


    While Department K was a part of the comic book Canadian government, and the physical location of many of the Weapon X sites were in Canada, the actual people that ran the Weapon X and Weapon Plus thing has always been a lot more vague. Between 'The Director', Mr Sinister, Lord Dark Wind, Romulus and Johnny Sublime, and who ever bank rolled 'The World' I'm still confuses as to who and what actually 'owned' the Weapon X and Weapon plus programs. Not to mention folks that are ripping off their developments, like X-23, and Agent Venom being called Project Rebirth 2.0 .

    I mean, if it WAS a purely Canadian program, why the hell are there so few actual Canadians with Powers?
     
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  12. IBulit

    IBulit Know what you're doing yet?

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    There is a Canada joke somewhere there, but I'm too russian to come up with one))
     
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  13. Siskulous

    Siskulous Know what you're doing yet?

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    You're or you've been.
     
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  14. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
     
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  15. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    No comments on Brightburn, or was everyone already aware of it?
     
  16. Buggy123

    Buggy123 I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Yeah I was kinda surprised no one commented on it either.

    I've already seen the trailer, not the film though. Personally, I think it looks interesting, but IMO it'd detract from it a bit if the kid is just "randomly evil". And I somewhat doubt he started murdering dozens of people because he got bullied a little.
     
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  17. Ganurath

    Ganurath Apologizes For Nothing

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    Most of us have read Worm. Superhero Horror is old hat for us.
     
  18. Ardy

    Ardy I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Yeah, Skitter would take that kids’ lunch money after he got super powers.
     
  19. Ganurath

    Ganurath Apologizes For Nothing

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    I was thinking more along the lines of "I have been desensitized by the Slaughterhouse Nine." A Superboy that lashes out ain't got shit on Franken Fran getting brainwashed by Charles Manson.
     
  20. Someguy Somewhere

    Someguy Somewhere The Critical Fumbler

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    The link was the first time I caught wind of Brightburn. I've never been big on horror, just as a personal preference. For the most part the films out there get by with gore, jump scares and/or psychological torment.

    Gore in films never bothered me because I appreciate special effects, particularly practical effects. I can sit and Laugh through the opening of Saving Private Ryan because of that, where as a few moments of watching Dr Pimple Popper on tv is enough to make me a bit off my lunch. It takes a lot of work to get to suspension of disbelief when it comes to body horror in live action stuff, especially with folks that know even a little of how things work behind the curtain.

    Jump Scares are just simple gag, and over use of them just irritates, same as using shaky cam or other cinematography tricks, like scare cords for the music. It can be done right, but seldom is.

    Psychological stuff is hit and miss, you can get stuff is justifiably creepy, or something that just wants to to strangle the characters for being oblivious. Very much depends on your audience with that one.

    Looking at Brightburn, I think it's actually closer to a Monster flick, then a horror movie....the difference being the focus on the one supernatural creature behind everything rather then any larger group of more vanilla horror goons and situations.

    Which, given what thread we're in, should shock next to no one, in that those films always turn into 'ok, how would *you* kill the beast?" debates. Which leads to full on Lex Luthor-ing considering the powerset involved here. I think Zoat's covered a fair number of the "how mundane's deal with super's" in WTR, so it's not like we need to run down the list.
     
  21. Threadmarks: Wing and Dagger (part 17)
    Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    22nd January
    01:21 GMT


    The officer in charge of the light carrier giving us a ride looks around as I stroll onto the bridge before returning his attention to the hologram the newly rechristened Chay'ara is gesturing to.

    "…and here, though we may need dedicated mining equipment to break through. We deliberately collapsed a mountain over it."

    "If it's that resilient, we could always just shoot our way through."

    "Or you could ask me?" Ring, scan the rubble down there? Ah, a hill. Looks completely natural to me, but I suppose that after all this time it would. "Heavy lifting is why I'm here, isn't it?"

    The officer's eyes shift to me again. "This is a Thanagarian matter. We'll involve aliens if we need to."

    "Okay, I offered." I stroll a little closer-. Ah, yes, the ring's giving me confused returns about what's inside the hill. "Does anything down there suggest that the site has seen any recent use?"

    The officer presses a button on his control panel, and the display shows a group of dots fly towards the planet. "We will know in a few minutes."

    Of course, I could just teleport down… But… Yeah, this is a Thanagarian matter. They aren't Earth; they're technologically developed enough to deal with this themselves. Unless one of the Seven Devils turns up in person I don't need to involve myself directly.

    "Chay-ara, what can you tell us about what other resources these people might have?"

    "In my first life, they would have legions of soldiers armed as we were, hierophants empowered by a sliver of their might, automata and.. other things. Like these Man-Hawks."

    "When you say 'automata', do you-?"

    "Statues granted animation by magic or animated by their will. It.. sickens me to think about it."

    "Why?"

    "We were their tools. As far as they were concerned, we existed only to glorify them. The.. ship.. that brought me to Earth? Only a handful of devout hierophants were allowed the knowledge of how such things operated. The Man-Hawks are the most obviously altered, but if the lizarkons have no Nth metal in their bodies I doubt that our own strength was a product of natural evolution."

    I look at her for a moment. "Their bodies, Sharon Parker."

    She glares at me, then appears to snap out of it. "Yess, yes, I-." She takes a moment to order her thoughts. "I'm sorry, this whole situation-. This battle was Chay-ara's life. All of her memories are coming back at once. I think I'm even getting phantom pains from her wings."

    "These creatures once ruled us? Altered us?" The officer bares his teeth in a sign of absolute distaste. "Disgusting."

    "Is it? Your people do use cybernetics, and-."

    "How would it be amongst your people if monsters altered you to turn you into their playthings?"

    I shrug. "We'd do as your forebears did: rise up, cast them down and take everything they ever owned for ourselves."

    "The gladness I feel at the knowledge that I am descended from such people only just barely counterbalances how repugnant I find what came before. You speak as if we were similar, but when have your people endured such horror?"

    "Ah..? Vampires and werewolves?" I shrug. "They've been around for centuries. Possibly longer. More recently, we've had Devil Jizz users, and magicians have been making pacts with demons for as long as we've got records."

    "Vam.. pires? What are those?"

    "Humans who gain massively increased strength, endurance and regeneration in exchange for being burned by the sun and needing to drink blood. Older vampires gain hypnotism, shapeshifting and the ability to control the weather."

    "Who do they serve?"

    "No idea. The few I've met usually don't serve anyone, or if they do it's the Elder who changed them. Werewolves get increased strength, endurance and regeneration but become mindlessly bestial during some parts of the lunar cycle. Jizzers get random powers and mutations, demon pacts can grant just about anything" He looks askance at me. "Working on Earth is great preparation for the rest of the universe: you'll never encounter anything you haven't seen before. Though the place itself is a bit-"

    The hologram shifts as data begins coming in from the attack ships.

    "-mental."

    Both Ms Parker and the officer give it their full attention at once, studying the changes brought by each update.

    "No defences." The officer gives his wings a small ruffle. "I will have them deploy a beacon so that we can teleport down a team of engineers."

    "Let me know if you need me." I raise my right hand to my forehead and-

    -step out and back-

    -next to Bleez. Her eyes are on me the moment I reappear, then she returns her attention to the monitor she's reading from.

    "They're sending down a team, but it doesn't look like anyone's here."

    "What do you know about Nth metal synthesis?"

    "I really don't remember how I did it." I shrug. "Lead, massive amounts of power and a whole lot of mental processing to keep the… Stuff I was working on from going critical or forming…" I frown. "Wrong, I think."

    "Do you know how much Nth metal the Thanagarian Empire uses each day?"

    "No?" I know that it's in virtually all of their advanced technology, but I've got no idea what their daily usage is like. "Lots, probably?"

    "I like being a singer, but Mother had me educated 'as befits my station'." She grimaces prettily. "I know economics. And I know how much Nth metal our transmutation factories create and how much power it takes to make them work."

    "Something.. not lining up?"

    "No, the numbers make sense. At the moment. But mine productivity is decreasing. And the fleet is growing."

    "I imagine me telling them that I couldn't remember how I made Nth metal out of lead was a bit of a disappointment."

    "The Thanagarian Empire doesn't have any friends. All of the people who live around our borders are worried about which of them will be conquered during our next expansion. If anyone finds out that our fleets can't be replaced-."

    "I'm not really seeing a problem. The Thanagarian navy is easily big enough to fight off any invasion force anyone else around here could muster. All that happens in the medium term is that Nth metal gets a little more expensive, and.. frankly, I don’t really want the Empire expanding any more, not without substantial internal reform."

    "Yes, I know what we're like! I don't want us 'expanding' either. But what do you think the High Mor will do if he starts getting worried about Thanagar's strength diminishing?"

    "Hopefully, adjust his policies to adapt to the new reality. But, in reality… Try to come to terms with people who should never be dealt with." I smile wryly. "I might get to fight one of the Seven Devils after all."
     
    Last edited: May 23, 2019
  22. SpiritualSlacker

    SpiritualSlacker Nurse God of Mischief

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    I suspect that most people who surf the internet for fun have already stumbled upon it. It’s had decent enough marketing for that, I think.

    I might watch it after it comes out. Some friends of mine have expressed interest in it, so we’re probably going to make a thing of it. I don’t know, it does seem like a very, hm, important movie, if that makes any sense?
     
  23. néocorvinus

    néocorvinus Versed in the lewd.

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    Military leader seeking a pact with an abomination wanting to enslave his race instead of searching for alternatives? Classic
     
  24. Slayer Anderson

    Slayer Anderson Orthodox Heretic

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    ...so this time Paul is the one who gets to topple a state ruled by secret collusion with demonic forces.

    Fun times ahead.
     
  25. Vaermina

    Vaermina Well worn.

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    If you're a space-faring civilization with power troubles in a universe where infinite energy is as simple as it is in this universe you're doing it wrong...
     
    Last edited: Apr 19, 2019
  26. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    "Heavy lifting is why I'm here, isn't it?"

    <sigh> Typical blinkered xenophobes...

    Flashback to Mass Effect 2...

    The joy of clear past memories...

    Always fun seeing someone realise just how bullshit Earth is...

    The joy of being a periodically aggressively expansionist empire.

    Missing orange on the closing quotation mark.
    Also, the joy of being genre-savvy in a Universe running on comic-book tropes.

    And the usual outcome: Hope for the best, plan for the worst.
     
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2019
  27. Mquz

    Mquz Versed in the lewd.

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    So - Lead Isotope confirmed? The one thing that’s surprising is that it’s not ridiculously magnetic.
     
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  28. helios

    helios Praise the Sun!

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    Brightburn is... an interesting idea. I like the premise. I like the existence of the genre. I think the fact that the movie exists is a good thing, and I like what it's trying to do.

    Tragically, I cannot handle scary movies. At all. I'll read the wiki article to get the story beats and find out how the narrative played out, but I will never watch that movie. Mostly because it would be me paying $11 to spend half the movie with my eyes closed and the other half screaming.
     
  29. DAT_NOOB

    DAT_NOOB Accused of writing in a far away land

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    Evil superman has been done before
     
  30. Ganurath

    Ganurath Apologizes For Nothing

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    Infinite energy generation, if you can stack enough Bleed Generators on enough shelves. Infinite transmission requires that magical superconductor that the Thanagarians lack the magical knowledge to make, though.
     
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