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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. Nervaqus987

    Nervaqus987 Well worn.

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    Man, fucking what.

    He literally had no idea that this kid even existed because Lashina sure as fuck didn't tell him.

    Although it was an idea that never saw the light of day, he wasn't aware that he even had a kid until this happens;

    Lashina: "Kal, I need your help. Our son has overthrown Darkseid and taken over Apokolips."

    Superman: "Okay, I'm going need you to go back and elaborate on every thing you just said, starting with "our son?!"
     
  2. Pinklestia

    Pinklestia Well worn.

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    Is like Brain from Pinky and the Brain was actually sane.
     
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  3. Bigreader

    Bigreader Doom. Boom!

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    I like it how Renegade Paul has to deal with the leftover situation from The Dictator tyrannical Justice Lords wall Paragon Paul had to deal with the basically anarchists dictators of the crime syndicate universe it's kind of a nice contrast.
     
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  4. AverusBlack

    AverusBlack AKA Aisling

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    What is satire, Alex, for 500 please

    Calm the calamity that is your mammaries
     
  5. Nervaqus987

    Nervaqus987 Well worn.

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    Look, Superman gets ragged on a lot in YJ for his treatment of Kon.

    Unfairly, in my opinion.

    So it's a bit hard to catch sarcasm when it's in the context of "Superman is a bad dad" when it's also a YJ fic.
     
  6. hance1986

    hance1986 A pitiful excuse for a man.

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    Can anyone find that Renegade piece where I think Paul Grayven was talking to his universe's version of Grayven who I think was getting weaker due to the Renegade crowding out his New God aspect? I can't find it anywhere.
     
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  7. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
    I think this was the point where I switched to using the numbers when it wasn't spoken out loud.
    Thank you, corrected.

    Perhaps, but I think that the Renegade would use the singular.
    No, that's correct.
    Thank you, corrected.
     
  8. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
     
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  9. Stsword

    Stsword Versed in the lewd.

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    Sure, that's easy.

    Look up mullet in this story and quickly there you are.
     
  10. Threadmarks: Conqueror's Moon (part 14)
    Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    27th December 2004
    19:42 GMT -5


    Aelia looks askance at Maeve and Mary as the two of them focus on their mobile telephones to the exclusion of all else. Mary is looking up pictures of me from Earth 50, while Maeve is looking up historical events to try and see how they're different here. My namesake is trying to keep his three youngest siblings contained by talking to them about the book they're reading for their English class. Bethany-

    "Are you dating Daddy?"

    -is doing a surprisingly good job at making Kara uncomfortable while simultaneously convincing her that this represents the real 'me'.

    "Ah? No. No, this is just.. breakfast."

    "Are you an alien? Are you a superhero?"

    "Yes, I'm an alien and yes, I'm a superhero."

    I was curious to see what the response amongst locals was when Supergirl turned up with my family in tow to a local diner. It's actually been more than a little muted. One person came up for an autograph, but she was clearly doing it for her young daughter. Everyone else… We're getting the occasional glance, but that's about it.

    "What's your superhero name?"

    "I'm Supergirl."

    "Oh, like Superboy! Is Lex Luthor your daddy too?"

    Kara stares at me. "What?"

    "Our version of Bizarro. Lex had a company called Cadmus create a young man using a combination of his and Kal-El's DNA. Fortunately, he takes after his other biological father and his adoptive mother."

    "Is he crazy like Bizarro?"

    "No no. Perfectly rational. His… The first full-clone of Kal-El Cadmus made was afflicted by an intense, constant rage, but M'gann and I fixed that."

    "So is Superman your daddy?"

    Oh, Bethany is a treasure.

    "N-. No. We're.. friends."

    She looks around awkwardly as she says it. Hm. I suppose that it's rather different, having been a superhero associated with America's first formal oligarchy and then a paramilitary soldier. People don't ask for autographs from members of their dictator's family, and I doubt that they ask for soldiers' autographs all that often.

    A bell chimes as the restaurant door opens and Richard walks in wearing civilian clothing: blue shirt, jeans, and a leather jacket. His eyes sweep the restaurant, but the most reaction my party gets when he realises that Kara is with us all is a blink. Kara meets his eyes for a moment and then sags the slight sag of someone caught doing something mildly embarrassing by a work colleague. She awkwardly waves her right hand and he walks over.

    Richard's eyes are on me as he approaches the head of the table. He's trying to place me but is clearly coming up short. I know that Zatanna's on his team, but perhaps bound spells aren't really her thing? This glamour is pretty cheap as they go. Someone like Richard should probably make a point of getting his hands on that most basic part of a countermagic suite: illusion-defying glasses.

    "Hey, Kara. And… I don't think we've been introduced?"

    "Good evening, Richard." His face freezes as he recognises my voice. "No, I don’t think we have. I've done some work with your father."

    "… Seven. And…" He looks around. "Did you kidnap a middle school class?"

    "No, they're all mine." The door to the female toilet swings open and Lynne emerges, recognition flickering in his eyes. "Did Scott tell you about Lynne?"

    "He.. said that he found a home for her. I didn't realise he was talking about you."

    "'fraid so. Oh, update on Apokolips: the civil war is still going on and the whole planet is getting wrecked, which is terrible in humanitarian terms but is probably quite good for Earth. Ah, but Granny Goodness has picked up a kryptonian child from somewhere."

    "How dangerous are they?"

    "If I took my glamour off you'd see a face covered in bruises, and I only just got back feeling in my left leg."

    "Where did they get a kryptonian-?"

    Kara's eyes widen. "Lashina."

    I nod. "Yeah, she was there. Seemed to have some sort of rapport with the child."

    "Kara?"

    "When.. Kal was mind controlled into thinking he was Darkseid's son, he.. was.. dating Lashina." Her gaze grows somewhat distant. "God, I don't even… Should we.. tell him?"

    Richard frowns. "Wait, aren't they different species?"

    I shrug. "Lashina might be able to make it work using domain powers-. Actually…" I hold out my left hand and fabricate a pack of kryptonian oral contraception tablets then pass them to Kara. "Humans… As a result of living in a high magic environment can also bypass some incompatibility issues, so-."

    She snatches it and shoves it into her handbag.

    "You're welcome."

    "The point is, Kal's got a child he doesn't know about growing up on a hell planet."

    I smile faintly. "Under Apokoliptian law, Granny Goodness gets custody."

    Richard holds up his right hand. "This is-. Yeah, okay, this is a problem we'll have to deal with. But what we're dealing with first is that Mister Miracle missed a scheduled call in." He looks at me. "Looks like you were right."

    "To be.. completely fair, there are good reasons why he might have missed it. Including allowing himself to be taken captive. He got away from Granny Goodness' Orphanage plenty of times, but since he had no way off the planet he ended up going back. Until they finally stuck him in the X-Pit." Maybe I should lend him the Sword of the Fallen, let him stab the-? No, he'd never go for it. "What's the protocol?"

    Richard shrugs. "We go get him back. But we've only got one ship, and their fleet is on alert for us."

    "So you need a way to sneak in quietly?"

    "Yeah, and I don't think your boom tubes are gunna cut it. Even if the sound doesn't give them away, the other Grayven's gotta have ways to detect them."

    "Yes." I nod. "That's why I've got a team building the silenced version on the Watchtower. I'm not about to leave my brother high and dry." … "And I guess we could pick up Barda too."

    "Mister Miracle didn't say anything about a silenced version."

    "Father didn't really want Scott to amount to anything. They were just trying to turn him into another near-mindless soldier drone. He didn't get what you'd call a complete education. And living on Earth, he didn't really have any reason or opportunity to study the technology."

    "And you did?"

    "No, I stole Desaad's Father Box, which had all his records. I mean, I had a pretty good education-. Hey." I turn to Kara. "When you haven't just eaten, remind me to tell you about the time Desaad gave me a sex education lesson. See, he had this anatomical specimen-."

    Richard leans towards me. "You can get us to Thanagar?"

    "Sure? The work should be finished soon. You just need to get in contact with your father and plan out the mission."
     
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2019
  11. thebishop8

    thebishop8 Umm, ackchyually...

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    Remove one on.

    *Their instead of They
     
  12. moralrelativity

    moralrelativity Recovering pendant.

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    The
     
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  13. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
     
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  14. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    So many kids...

    Living up to her father's trollish ways. Perfect.

    I expect the crowd are assuming things about him and Kara, things that could fill tabloid rags for years to come :D

    Wrong universe for that, alas.

    I note he didn't say who that was. I bet Kara just assumed 'Lois Lane'...

    He says it so casually.

    Yes, yes she is. :p Encourage those trollish ways, perhaps she can become a Deadpool/Ambush Bug type of hero - annoy the bad guys into surrender!

    Hopefully, Stormwatch has a better rep than the Lords. I doubt they've hit Youngblood levels though...

    ...Was that 'They Live' reference intentional? No, wait, of course it was :D

    'Seven'? What? Or did he just decide on an attack plan or something?

    Again, so casually... I bet Richard is 'Screaming Internally' right about now. Something like **FFFFFUU-...**

    Heh. Amusing that she caught on immediately. Kal would have told her about it, I bet.

    What could he do about it?

    Earth Bullshit, for the embarrassing win.

    Embarassment level rising.

    "hhhnnhnggh... ... Aaaahh. Houston, we have no problems..."

    Complete is not the word for it... Even Spartans would look at Apokalips' child-rearing system and go "Damn, tone it down a little..."

    Oh, gods, I am glad I wasn't eating... Ew... :eek: I shudder at the slightest imagining of it.

    Heh, nudging a slightly better relationship between the repentant Lords and Stormwatch... Sensible.

    And so the heist begins to take shape. Will it play out quickly, or are we looking at a two-parter here, i wonder?
     
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2019
  15. Mquz

    Mquz Versed in the lewd.

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    Bethany as the New God of Awkward Questions... huh, I can sort of see that working out.
    Also, the real life Spartan child rearing system wasn’t actually all that different from this (raised from a young age in military school, compulsory military employment, discouraged individuality, etc...). However, Sparta was better towards adults, in that beyond a certain age they didn’t remain in the military.
     
  16. Vaermina

    Vaermina Well worn.

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    You think he would be smart enough to not make up stories by now...
     
  17. Cuchulin

    Cuchulin Versed in the lewd.

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    Yeah, the Spartan boys didn't go to school so much as boot camp.
     
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  18. Bigreader

    Bigreader Doom. Boom!

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    You know what the state reminds me of the fact that Paragon Paul found Supergirl and rescued her before her ship and she died but Renegade Paul AKA this guy never found her in his universe so the kara of his universe is probably dead
     
  19. Handlewithcare

    Handlewithcare Versed in the lewd.

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    Okay, taking your chidren to another paralel for breakfast, one were you are a global criminal, seems once again rather reckless.
     
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  20. Mquz

    Mquz Versed in the lewd.

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    She was in space for years. A few more months should be ok.
     
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  21. Prince Charon

    Prince Charon Just zis guy, you know?

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    Given how much his mind's been messed with, I'm not sure he doesn't actually remember getting such a lesson.
     
  22. néocorvinus

    néocorvinus Versed in the lewd.

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    Except that by acting like Grayven, he eventually became Grayven. Their souls look alike. He probably gained memories along the powers
     
  23. Ngamer11

    Ngamer11 Experienced.

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    Can someone give a list of all the children Grayven has taken in at the moment? The only ones I remember are the vampire-succubus hybrids and Lynne.
     
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  24. zerofarad

    zerofarad Know what you're doing yet?

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    Distant?
     
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  25. Aeess

    Aeess I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    There is also Aelia the granddaughter of Lord Cyprian, the nephew of Queen Clea. Grayven agreed to foster her, so she can be exposed to the surface world similar to King Orin.
     
  26. Wheenesss

    Wheenesss Versed in the lewd.

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    In which episode did Grayven pick up more kids? Not sure how I missed that.
     
  27. Aeess

    Aeess I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    He picked up 8 Hybrids before Episode 47: Zigzag, thats when we saw them the first time, they've been mentioned multiple times since then.

    He only took in the Atlantean girl in Episode 80: Fieldtrip.

    Except for Lynne those are the only children hes taking care of.
     
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2019
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  28. AverusBlack

    AverusBlack AKA Aisling

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    Lynn, the vampire/succubus hybrids, Cassandra Cain. There were several boys and a few girls in the hybrids group, they're probably from that lot
     
  29. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.

    I'll post the full list of children when I get home.
     
  30. Zig

    Zig Not too sore, are you?

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    Hi, welcome to With this Ring. I'll be your fellow reader.
     
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