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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. Gh055twr1t3r

    Gh055twr1t3r Idle Prophet

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    Wait there's a small misunderstanding here. The quote is in relation to the events at the beginning of the Fate/Grand Order mobile game and isn't actually a statement on humanity IRL as a whole. The quote is supposed to be an summation of the kind of message that Fate, Kinoko Nasu specifically, tries to communicate which is that you should try to express compassion and understanding even in dark times.

    And now to go back a bit on topic, I don't see a discernible difference between solving problems because its the right thing to do and solving problems because they make the world wrong. The end result is the same. Paul's desire is to make the universe right and so he makes decisions that will lead him to that point. That means he's doing what feels is the right thing to do. Sure, other people disagree because they're more focused on means as opposed to the ends but even Paul has standards. He doesn't want to annihilate the entirety of the Reach he just wants them to stop being an existential threat to everyone around them. He'll annihilate them all if he has to or if he feels there's no alternative but he's willing to entertain the thought of an alternative. Heck, he's even thought about how his massacre of the Citadelians could have been handled better.
     
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  2. jasonh23761

    jasonh23761 Not too sore, are you?

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    Yep, that was where I got it from. Asterix and Obelix comics aren't exactly common in the States but we do have them.
     
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  3. Radix

    Radix Not too sore, are you?

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    It's the Al from Earth -14 with the Crime Syndicate. He used Yellow I am pretty sure. I always get mixed up cause of Blue Alan and Blaul existing.
     
  4. Wivk

    Wivk Know what you're doing yet?

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    Shut the fuck up about fate.
     
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  5. Sockmonkey

    Sockmonkey I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    The echidna has a four-headed penis.
     
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  6. SaltyWaffles

    SaltyWaffles I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    That doesn't make sense, unless he is literally saying, out of nowhere, for people to sexually enter their friends (but saying it in as minimalist a manner as possible, even at the cost of being understood).

    It's just wrong. Your writing is supposed to convey things to the reader in a way that is as easy to understand as the story can allow. Except, in this case, nothing is being conveyed correctly. If he's supposed to be talking very quickly, then the way to convey that properly is

    "Enter, friends," he said quickly, like speaking to others was something tedious.

    The grammar is there to make understanding what you're reading clear. The text is there to give context or nuance that grammar cannot (or should not) convey. That's why dialog in novels is usually accompanied by text, rather than just always left as is.
     
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  7. Threadmarks: Medidiction (part 9)
    Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    27th August 2012
    00:19 GMT


    The abbot is a tall and thin man, and rather than the robes I half-expected he's wearing light body armour with only small amounts of green sigil decoration. A simple weighted ball sits in his right palm, which he holds straight out to the side without a tremor. It doesn't look particularly heavy, but holding even a light weight in that position for any length of time can be a strain. There's a desk off to one side of the room but the main area is filled with what appears to be gym equipment. Nothing complicated, mostly weighted objects and other devices to improve endurance. Or rather, to improve the willpower.

    Makes sense. This order was inspired by the Green Lanterns who fought against the Spider Guild. They're a martial order… Ah. I've sort of been getting 'kung fu monastery' vibes, but the inclusion of modern weapons and armour was throwing me off slightly.

    "Welcome, Green Lantern Graf Toren. And welcome to you, Orange Lanterns."

    The abbot isn't smiling as he says it, but he isn't frowning either. Maybe that's the sort of thing Lantern Toren was talking about when he mentioned his concern about forgetting how not to be green. Empathic vision of the abbot gives me a green glowing fuzz, suggesting both considerable willpower and spiritual self-mastery. Not seeing much else.

    "Thank you, abbot." I perform a shallow bow. "There's no telling what mischief we might have gotten up to if you hadn't agreed to sequester us away here."

    "If you wish to learn to be a better teacher, and your students better Lanterns, this is the best place for you to be. Your social media page-"

    Error, server overload.

    "-just crashed again." He gives me a look of mild disapproval. "And I honestly think that young people like yourself place too much import on those things."

    "I'm… I'm inclined to agree." Have to find time to dump a few hundred copies of my book on a local library. "I understand that Karax is having some sort of religious reformation?"

    "Yes." The arm with the weight remains completely still as he nods. "Though the precise nature of our social changes would probably be difficult for someone not used to our civilisation to understand."

    "Understood. But if you think that there's something I can usefully do, feel free to ask."

    "Should such a situation occur, I will certainly mention it. I will make our full library open to you, save for the private words past Lanterns have for their successors. Those are not mine to grant you. Meditation rooms, lecture halls and sparring arenas can also be made available at your request. In return, we ask that you share any particular revelations you have."

    "Certainly. I imagine that will come in handy for working out what to do with the orange light."

    "If I had been asked prior to your emergence, I would have assumed that the sort of person to use a power ring driven by avarice would be an easily distracted self indulgent monster. And yet, you have created a Corps and aimed it at the largest and most successful empire in the galaxy. Why?"

    "My predecessor lived down to your expectations. But for myself, I believe that the measure of my life is the changes I make in the universe. And I prefer it when the universe works a particular way. If we handed out rings at random or to people who experienced the strongest avarice, it probably wouldn't go very well. But by selecting people who want what we want or what we want them to want, we've managed to keep almost everyone pointing in the same direction."

    Mild disapproval.

    "'Almost'?"

    "The orange light is inherently corrupting. Some people lose sight of their higher order desires while using it. They get disarmed and placed in a rehabilitation centre. We're still perfecting the process to screen out people vulnerable to that sort of thing. But orange is hardly the only colour to have that sort of problem."

    "Oh? Does yellow have a problem like that?"

    "It's not quite as corrupting as orange, but it still encourages its users to see the people around them as vessels for their fears." I shake my head. "The first yellow lantern I met said that was literally why he did anything: to relish the fear he caused and the power he held over others."

    "And you believe that was the result of his use of a yellow power ring?"

    "I don't know for certain, but I met a parallel universe version of him who didn't have a yellow ring, and he is a really nice guy."

    "I see. I would like to discuss this with you further later, but unless you have any questions for me, Lantern Graf Toren can show you to wherever you want to go."

    "Just one question, both for you and Lantern Toren. You know how Green Lantern selection works, right?"

    Toren nods. "Not in every detail, but a general overview."

    "On Earth, we don't have any sort of Green Lantern training program. Jordan got picked because he was competent and close to where Abin Sur died. Guy was picked because he lived close to Jordan. Stewart was the same. But if you've got a monastery full of trained people, why were you chosen in particular? Rather than…"

    The man who is still holding that weight smiles faintly.

    "I believe that I was passed over due to my age. I'm fairly robust, but I'm not as young as I was. It also becomes harder to learn new things as you get older. I would struggle to adapt to the requirements of power ring combat."

    Lantern Toren nods. "Most monks who study here do so to improve their self-discipline. Few make this their home for their entire lives. When I received the ring I was one of the youngest full time monks. I also studied interstellar law prior to receiving this ring."

    I nod. It makes sense. The Guardians want strong willed people, but they also need people who can do a fairly complex and risky job. Just having a strong will doesn't guarantee that you'll make a good soldier or police officer.

    "Thank you. That makes sense."

    "I have a question in return." The abbot looks me in the eyes. "How many Lanterns does your species have at the present time?"

    "Four Green, one Blue, one Violet and one-" I spread my arms slightly. "-Orange. In this parallel; I've met alternate versions of myself with every colour."

    Except White, but, under wraps for now.

    "With such a success, are you sure that you need to be here?"

    "If I was sure, I wouldn't be here. And the fact that my species appears to make good Lanterns doesn't help anyone else."

    Toren doesn't look quite certain how to take that.

    "But if your species has a knack for using power rings, why don't you recruit other members of your species?"

    "Because I know what we're like. It's funny when we cause problems for other people, but I don't really want to be stuck on the other end of that."

    "Hah!"

    The abbot smiles, nodding. Toren seems a little surprised by his outburst.

    "Also, we were recently on the receiving end of a planetary invasion. Things are extremely unsettled. And the war the Corps is fighting is a long way away from Earth. People won't be as invested."

    But maybe I should consider it? Luthor's out but Lonnie's around… I haven't checked on him since the Sheeda attacks, but I'd be astonished if he weren't still alive. That's probably something I should do.

    "I think that's everything. Lantern Toren, please show us to the library."
     
    Last edited: Aug 12, 2021
  8. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Hmm, emulating the warrior nature of the GLC.

    More willpower training.

    Me too.

    You do have a knack for getting into mischief.

    I'm also still expecting a Black Light cult to show up.

    'save for the'

    And you wouldn't be all that wrong.

    It does tend to encourage sociopathic tendencies in the user.

    We know Al was already a bastard before he got the ring, so it could have been yellow corruption, or it may have been all him with the yellow light not doing much or anything.

    That's Anarky for anyone curious.
     
  9. moralrelativity

    moralrelativity Recovering pendant.

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    I'm unsure of that happened here. Did the abbot deliberately cause OL's page to crash again?
     
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  10. BlueMangoAdea

    BlueMangoAdea Alive. For now.

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    Too many people are connecting to OL's impromptu social media page.
     
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  11. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
     
  12. Ngamer11

    Ngamer11 Experienced.

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    That should say 'would like to'.
     
  13. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    Presumably the weighted orb is part of that training. Or some manner of physiotherapy for a recent injury. Or both. It seems the abbot is a firm believer in a healthy mind and a healthy body. Not an unpleasant concept, true. Especially if this is more of a training hall than a cloistered order.

    No reason to keep their training gear in the past. Especially if it's well known that those who train here may be better candidates for Lanternhood.

    Watch the sass, OL. Though I see the abbot is a solid fan of personal discipline... But clearly it's come at some personal cost. I doubt he's bothered with family or fame...

    I suppose it was the easiest way to make his presence known, even if it's doing a number on their internet. Though I wonder how the abbot knew that. Some manner of neural implant with a wireless uplink?

    Might want to spread the love around, OL. Any one library may find itself having trouble keeping up with demand.

    Unfortunately, as much as the government might prefer him to leave, that ain't happening. Maybe some public speeches about the ability of different colours to co-exist?

    Heck, he may even inspire the founding of a sister temple dedicated to the Orange Light. Would probably be helpful for producing more resistant prospects.

    Well, he's on target with his first assumption. Though Larfleeze isn't particularly widely known, and for good reason, he pretty much was just that. OL, on the other hand...

    ...OL has an external focus for his desires. That, and the initial lack of a soul to be corrupted by Orange Ligh overload, is probably the biggest part of it. Though I suppose Hinon's experimental ring did help...

    Ah, yes. Something the Corps doesn't publicise much... And for good reason. I doubt they'd have had as large an initial intake if it had been known that you could go nuts...

    Going by Canon? More than likely, but less intensely. Most of the Sinestro Corps are monsters because Sinestro chose them for that reason. If they'd been using rings more like the Green or Orange lanterns, those with the discipline to embrace and control their fear might have done well.

    ...If he's talking about Earth -14's Power Ring Yellow, aka 'Boss' Alan Scott, I figure he was already an asshole beforehand. The nature of the negative universes wouldn't foster goodness, after all, and the 'heroes' of their world are likely seen as somewhat abnormal for that reason.

    Though I rather suspect making any kind of public appearance might be dangerous at this stage. Let people get used to having a new colour of Lantern on-planet first...

    Mostly the 'Overcome Fear' aspect of it, I bet. I rather suspect it's not widely known what the exact criteria are.

    Fitness? Age? Some inner flaw that he isn't even aware of? Who can say? The Guardian's seeker protocols are probably very complex and very arcane for such reasons.

    So there probably aren't that many who stay here after their training. Bet they're highly sought after in some fields of employment, though. As for Toren, I rather suspect the law thing was a tidy bonus.

    Hmm... Jordan had military discipline, and serving as a test pilot would not be for the unintelligent. Guy has a degree in psychology and counselling, and is familiar with police work thanks to his brothers. Stewart is a marine, albeit nominally retired... Savenlovich is also military, by way of the Soviet air force. A definite theme amongst Earth's Greens.

    And before anyone asks, he is referring to the local Carol Ferris, who technically is was a Lantern in her time as Star Sapphire. Dame Carol is only technically visiting, after all.
    (Set straight by Mr Zoat...)

    Well, first, Humans are not all as good as they sound from the examples above. I shudder at some people getting their hands on Orange rings... And would anyone want a Corps that recruits primarily from one planet? <cough>Renegade<cough> Excuse me, bit dusty.

    Probably a little surprised that anyone would denigrate their own species that way. Given his people's history with the Green Lanterns, I can understand that.

    Again, think of the most entitled, obnoxious people you can. Now imagine them with power rings... :sneaky: I apologise for any nightmares that causes.

    "I like this one! He understands!" Truly, it takes a wise man to see anything but the best in himself, much less his people.

    'Aliens' is probably an easier way to spin the Sheeda than 'our distant-future descendants from a dying world', whether to Humanity or extra-terrestrials. I mean, Earth's got a reputation for weirdness as it is...

    More things for the to-do list next time he's on Earth. Bet it's hundreds of pages long by now if he printed it out... Though I'm not sure giving a ring powered by avarice to a teenage boy will work out too well, especially one as focused and.. opinionated as Lonnie Machin is. Especially one as devoted to his cause as only a young teenager can be.

    I'm liking this abbot fellow. He gives off an aura like Alan: worldly experience tempered by resolve. Some interesting philosophical discussion, too. Let's hope OL can refine the training process he's developing here. Perhaps Onik can found a new Orange equivalent to this place one day, if all goes well...
     
    Last edited: Jul 3, 2021
  14. Tavarokk

    Tavarokk Pursuer of perversion

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    Incidentally, Mr Zoat, what became of that Vega-themed video game the MC comissioned?
     
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  15. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Hmm, given the green text he may have been focusing and used some device that responds to that focus.

    They may have created tech that works by willing it to emulate the GLC.

    It was probably a whole lot easier to find monsters rather than Dirty Harry's.

    Capo Scott, to be exact.

    And the ring either enhanced his asshole side with yellow corruption, or it didn't do anything and that was all him.

    Hmm, given their combat training and law studying they may go on to be police officers or soldiers.

    Plus he's very strong willed from suppressing his rage.

    I think it was once mentioned that over half of the GLC is made up of former soldiers, cops or warriors, since their lifestyle would necessitate a strong will.

    I think she stopped being that.

    The thing she used at first was returned to the Zamarons and given what happened, like losing her mind and trying to either kill or brainwash the man she loved, she may not want to have anything to do with the Star Sapphire thing anymore.

    To be fair to him he primarily created it to fight Darkseid.

    If it was law enforcement organization, then there would be problems.

    Paul has done far stupider things and empowered people that he should have never empowered.

    Choosing Lonnie will be far from the dumbest thing he's done.

    He can learn, like when he gave up on Luthor, but it takes him a long time.
     
  16. Bud-E

    Bud-E Stand up so I can push you down!

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    I'm curious to see this green lantern religion's view on other corps. Would Blue be well received? Violet has a bad history but their actively trying to change and Indigo shesh Indigo.

    Also, did paragon meet Lonnie at some point I remember renegade did during a talk show? Is the main timeline Lonnie a supervillain yet?
     
    Last edited: Jul 3, 2021
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  17. AidanMorgan

    AidanMorgan Essentially Overworked

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    Funnily enough, "would" works too. Either add a word or remove one and you get almost the exact same sentence.

    English.
     
  18. m_d

    m_d Fascinated by storytelling

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    It does if you interpret it to mean 'Enter as friends'. "Enter, friends" is identifying people as friends and asking them to enter. "Enter friends" is, in one likely reading in this case, telling people to be friends/friendly if they want to come in, and implying that they will be unwelcome otherwise. Both can be welcoming, but the second has a directive about their behaviour that the first does not. Considering how disruptive OL has demonstrated himself to be, this admonishment seems not out of place, and stylistically fits a wise warrior monk archetype's delivery. I don't know for sure that this is what Mr Zoat was going for, but it does make sense, and I'm happy with it as an explanation.
     
  19. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    No, I don't think Lonnie is a supervillain in the Paragon timeline.
     
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  20. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
    No, he's talking about Dame Carol Ferris. Regular Carol Ferris doesn't have a ring and doesn't want one.
    It's still in development, though the potential market is a good deal smaller.
     
  21. DrThoth

    DrThoth I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    A good deal smaller than what? Their previous estimations?
     
  22. Ngamer11

    Ngamer11 Experienced.

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    Found an old error.
    That should just say 'was nonsense'.
     
  23. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    No, that's a legitimate way to phrase it.
    Yes. A lot of people died, South America might well be going non-technological and people have a lot less disposable outcome even in places that are managing.
     
  24. DrThoth

    DrThoth I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Wonder if the South American tribes would be interested in the plant-based technologies of Alstair or Medphyll's planets. Green Lanterns probably can't do anything to connect them, but Paragon or Alan could. I forget if Alan's talked to Danner onscreen and how that went, given their history, but I imagine he'd want to help as much as he was allowed to out of a sense of obligation.
     
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  25. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    You'd think, but the problem is Euanthe. She isn't going to like alien plant technology, for much the same reason that Swamp Thing doesn't
    He hasn't, but there isn't really anything either of them has to say to the other. Danner doesn't need his old records, Alan didn't kill the Sons of Dawn.
     
  26. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    I thought he killed some of them when they fought in the past.

    He seemed very upset when he talked about that period.

    Unless he was upset that they died from the diseases they contracted.
     
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  27. DrThoth

    DrThoth I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Yeah, I thought that's what happened too.
     
  28. DrThoth

    DrThoth I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    I suppose that's understandable for a nature spirit. I know she was boosted by Swamp Thing's fruit (and possibly the twig from the Tree in Eden, unless that just makes her more effective against demons), but is the worship she's receiving also metaphysically enhancing her and/or altering her nature in any way?
    I assume the indigenous peoples have their own deities who still exist in some shape or form? Do they have any opinions or interactions with things? Also, how aware are the Olympians about Euanthe's activities? I'd be interested in Demeter's opinion as the most relevant; she's the goddess of agriculture aka cultivated/human-oriented plantlife though, so I'm not sure they would get along.
     
  29. LazySloth13

    LazySloth13 Versed in the lewd.

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    He told Paul the tribals died from exposure to germs and disease brought by Danner and other non-native intruders, with mention about how he saw kids/young adults coughing their lungs out. While the Danner Formula gives superhuman strength and durability it still leaves a person susceptible to non-physical injuries.
     
  30. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    No, Alan didn't kill any of them. Roughed up severely, yes. Killed, no.
    It makes it easier for her to interact with the devout.
    "Fat lot of good you did."

    Wait, did you mean the people's opinions of the deities, or the deities' opinions of the recent changes?
    Slightly aware. The Olympians haven't ever been worshipped in South America.
     
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