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I looked over your threads. Yes, you need to work on your writing.
Grammar, spelling, and punctuation are the basics. People who read a lot notice those mistakes and stop reading, because you don't take the time to fix them.
Narrative voice comes next. Some people speak with accents and dialects in real life, and that's fine.
Unfortunately, in writing there is a "proper" way of "speaking," and it's absolutely necessary that you write as closely to that way as possible, especially if you're new to writing. That's because the "proper" way is easy for everyone to understand.
If your narration doesn't present itself in an understandable way, no one will know what you're writing.
There are some more stuff to consider: characters, setting, plots. That stuff is important, too, but ideas are cheap (no matter how awesome you think they are).
If you want my advice about writing, take some time to look at published books or well regarded stories online.
Look at how their sentences are structured and formatted, how they follow grammatical rules. Try writing in as many patterns as you can, keeping in mind grammar and spelling.
Comments on Profile Post by Doute Fuller