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A Meeting Of Minds [Negima/Haruhi]

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This was supposed to be an omake to Haruna's Most Ero-ero Adventure. Then it outgrew its...
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AckSed

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This was supposed to be an omake to Haruna's Most Ero-ero Adventure. Then it outgrew its confines into a full crossover.

Chapter 1 - Haruhi Meets Haruna

Haruhi was idly browsing and tapping away at her phone when a glowing portal appeared over her bed. She gasped and had to roll out of the way when a young girl about her age fell through, face-first.

"Uuugh..."

Haruna lifted her head to find herself in a bedroom that looked vaguely like her own, manga and figures all around. Was she home?

A girl's face filled her vision and began excitedly babbling about sliders, asking what planet she was from and whether she had secret alien powers.

Most definitely not.

It had been a couple of days since the fiasco with Yuki casually remaking the world then reverting it back. Getting home from the hospital had caused Haruhi to be annoyingly protective; I was told to not go anywhere without notifying her. Since I hadn't bothered to leave the house, that meant a blessed few days without anything untoward happening. The relative peace and quiet of the evening was shattered by the sound of the Imperial March playing from my phone. Speak of the devil.

I sighed minutely before picking up.

...Haruhi, slow down. What have you found?

"I told you, I have conclusive, eyewitness proof of a slider! And what's more, she landed in my room! She's here RIGHT NOW!"

Uh-huh.

"...say hello, Haruna-san."

I heard the phone being handed to someone. Don't tell me she's created someone out of thin ai- "Uh, hello? Your friend's a lovely girl, but I really want to get going, seeing as how all my friends were under attack when I left the Magical World."

What.


Cycling towards Haruhi's house after extracting a few more details, I had to admit a girl appearing with a full backstory and a belief in magic was simply too thorough for Haruhi. The girl said had been on some sort of school trip with her classmates to find her teacher's father, then said father's enemies came out of nowhere and destroyed the teleporter, scattering them all across the magical world. It sounded like some sort of bad manga plot.

Starting to lean towards 'summoning her from a manga'.

A taxi was driving away as I pulled up to the house. Itsuki, Mikuru and Yuki were about to knock, but turned to face me at the screech of brakes.

A full assembly, then.

"We thought it best to come with all haste, considering the circumstances", said Itzuki.

Mikuru-chan, has anything like this happened before?

She shook her head. "No, we have no record of this particular dimensional disturbance being possible. Even classified information with classified information... oh, shoot. I only know that it did not originate from Haruhi-san."

I raised my eyebrow at that. Yuki?

"The Data Integration Thought Entity concurs. Highly unusual. It should be investigated."

She sounded interested.

If this was unique in the experience of a time traveller, and a multidimensional AI and its humanoid interface, I was halfway towards believing.

At that point Haruhi opened the door and dragged us upstairs.

Meeting Haruhi's "SOS-dan" was something of an anti-climax to Haruna. It seemed like any other school club, though she could see parallels with her classmates. The tall, slender boy called Itsuki kinda reminded her of Kaede's laid-back attitude, though there was also an icy, secretive coolness you found in a natural seme. Add some wire-rimmed glasses... oh this had potential. The other boy, Kyon, was almost Chisame-like in his scepticism of her and her story. Tsundere to the core, and she immediately paired him with Itsuki, who proceeded to make her day by leaning over Kyon, putting a hand on his shoulder and whispering in his ear; he seemed deliciously uncomfortable with the attention. She wanted to leap up and put her glasses on Itzuki, just so he could peer over them to make it perfect!

The two new girls were interesting in their own right. Mikuru was adorable and sexy; easily startled, though the blush when she was caught looking at Haruna out of the corner of her eye made her even cuter. Such looks were definitely a point of contention in this club. Yuki literally did not give her much to work with, like Yue's stoicism times ten. Her steady gaze was eerily reminiscent of Zazie, content to sit in the back and absorb. With the way he'd glanced towards her upon entering the room, then relaxed fractionally, Kyon seemed to have if not a thing for her, then a friendly understanding. More potential there. Possible love triangle?

That left the N2 explosion in the room. The "brigade chief", Haruhi. Every gesture was a flail, every word a shout as she excitedly recounted Haruna's arrival to the rest. Again. The way Mikuru cringed ever so slightly, as if they were handling a live bomb - it spoke of someone who was tolerated more than liked. Sure, she herself on a good day got this excited, but her friends accepted that. Even when they were dragged along, it faded into the background of the circus that was 3-A, anyway. Not here - the look of exasperation on Kyon was well-worn.

The speech was finished, evidently she was supposed to make an introduction, but she was cut off by Haruhi proclaiming, "Therefore we shall take all effort to find a way to send Haruna back to her own place! You shall not rest until you have found a way! We will start, though, with a thorough interview about who she is and the world she comes from, which shall be published to our undying fame!"

Thaaat was less good. She needed to go back quickly - fame would be kinda awkward to deal with. Time to nip this in the bud. Taking her cue from the rest, she said deferentially: "Haruhi-sama, I thank you for your kind words. Unfortunately, even now my friends and classmates are fighting for their lives; I wish to aid them in their struggle and I must regretfully request that my presence be kept secret to facilitate such."

The looks of sympathy on the faces of Kyon and the rest were welcome. The airy dismissal of her concerns by Haruhi was not. What was this girl's problem?

If the way Kyon was berating Haruhi was any indication, he was well familiar with them, acting the regent slash advisor. Heh, slash. Any minute now she'd be sent out for tea and the real talk would begin.

Having sent Haruhi into the kitchen for tea, I explained the real situation to Haruna.

"You just so happen to have an alien, a time traveller and an esper in your club? What does that make- ah, you're the normal guy. Everything happens to you, doesn't it?"

You don't seem surprised.

"Kyon - can I call you Kyon? - my class had a robot, a vampire, a time-traveller from Mars and was taught by a 10-year-old boy who was secretly a mage. This isn't even close to my limit."

This would be the teacher you followed to the magical world?

"Mn. I can't help worrying though." She studied my face, seemingly searching for something before her face lit up with a sly smile. "You know, you would suit a pair of glasses."

Uhm... thank you?

"It's nothing. Now you didn't seem too dismayed at my story, and with the way you've been checking Yuki-san out she's the all-powerful alien who pulls you out of these situations. What's the plan?"

I gaped a bit. That was disturbingly insightful.

The smile turned smug. "Kukukuh, it's pretty easy when you know what to look for."

Yuki, um, can you sense anything?

"There is a two-dimensional wormhole linked to the ceiling from something in Haruna-san's pocket. The energy it is emitting is... novel." Turning to Haruna, she asked, "May I examine the object?"

Haruna handed over a card-shaped- okay, it was a tarot card.

Yuki burbled a fragment of alien gibberish at it.

"Fascinating. Around the material of the card is a highly complex dimensional construct. Whatever function it has, it is still being supplied energy through the wormhole, and the rift that deposited you is still open." She enunciated a far longer string at the ceiling before handing it back. "While I cannot replicate the energy, I have erected a blocking field that will wedge it open wide enough to admit a person once it absorbs enough from the link."

"I get to go home?"

"In approximately 49 hours and 3 minutes. I regret I cannot be more accurate. It is a guess." She looked slightly irritated at this admission, but it was interrupted by Haruna tackle-hugging Yuki. Her eyes actually widened as Haruna snuggled into her, babbling her thanks.

Come to think of it, when had I ever hugged Yuki? I'd pledged eternal fealty like a samurai, but not given a hug. Well, Haruhi was a huggy person, Itsuki loved to linger and give meaningful looks - with those role models, I was disinclined.

Maybe I should, sometime.

Thank the gods of plot for convenient coincidences! She'd landed straight into the kind of people that could help her.

She gave Yuki one last squeeze as Haruhi came in carrying a tray, grumbling about this not being the job of the chief. She tensed at the sight of her hugging one of the club members, before narrowing her eyes slightly at Haruna. Hands off, got it. Then again who was she to tell her what to do?

"Forgive me, Haruhi-sama. I was expressing gratitude for helping me work out something. With her insight, I believe I will amass enough power to return home in two days." Smiling cheerfully, she continued, "Besides, she's adorable. Who wouldn't want to hug her?"

The annoyance faded and she smiled back. "Of course she is! It's important to have someone cute and stoic to balance out sexy moe characters."

"Tch, that's basic. I suppose you scouted Mikuru-san and Itsuki-san for their looks."

"Well, obviously. I just so happened to have considered their personalities as well."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Then where does Kyon-san fit in? You obviously had a role in mind from the very start." When Haruhi opened her mouth to answer, Haruna kept talking. "You hesitated a little too long. No, Kyon was there before the club. Founder? Had the idea for the club. He doesn't have a role, he's just there. Always, dependably there." By now, the other girl was looking a little stunned at the cold reading. Before she thought to be angry, Haruna said, "My apologies, Haruhi-sama. My hyper-intuition sometimes activates on its own." She pinched the bridge of her nose. "There. I have deactivated the skill." 'Except for the bullshitting skill, that's on all the time', she thought.

"Ah, Haruhi-sama, the tea is spilling. Allow me to take the tray." Haruna calmly handed teacups to the club members as shock warred with anger on the brigade chief's face, before curiosity rallied. "Do that again!"

"I could, but I have a better trick. A genuine magical artifact!" She produced her card for the benefit of the new audience. What the hell, she'd only get to do this once.

"Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm Haruna Saotome, magical manga-ka extraordinare! No plot too preposterous! No pairing too perverted! Partner to Negi Springfield and loyal member of Ala Alba! Adeat!" There was a brief flash, her normal street clothes suddenly covered with an artist's apron as the card changed to a sketchpad and fountain pen that floated in midair. She bowed to a mini storm of clapping. "Now, a suggestion from the audience of something to draw. You there." She pointed at Mikuru.

"Eh? Awa, umm... a kitty?"

"The lady wants a kitty." She drew a few lines, quickly sketching in the tail and so on. "Come forth, Neko!" The plush-toy-looking cat appeared in a cloud of sparkles, leaping up onto Mikuru's knee.

"He's soft!"

"Glad you like it. As you can see, I can draw anything and it comes to life. Next suggestion!"

Haruhi, remembering who was supposed to be in charge, blurted, "A- a magical... guy!"

"Excellent, Haruhi-sama", said Haruna, though she sniggered a little at the fumble. This one took much longer - "Bear with me" - but a few minutes later she exclaimed, "Come forth, Naki!"

The slender young man that emerged from the sparkles was a vision straight from a shojou. Red hair perfect for running your hands through, clad in a tattered cloak and wielding a staff in his hands, fingers so long they were practically prehensile, he regarded Haruhi cooly over the top of his half-moon glasses. She seemed to meet his approval, as his brown eyes heated and he walked over (on divinely long legs) to kneel before her, laying his staff at her feet. "My lady, your beauty is without compare. I ask for nothing more than to serve thee."

Kyon snorted abruptly at the look on Haruhi's face - she was staring open-mouthed at the Naki-golem, caught somewhere between amazement and arousal. She recovered enough to say, "R-rise." Naki stood at parade rest beside her, brushing his hair out of his eyes. Mikuru, cat temporarily forgotten, actually gulped. Was that a hint of jealousy she saw on Kyon's face? She drew another line on her mental relationship chart.

Yuki, instead of watching the show, was examining the ceiling. Interesting, perhaps the activation triggered something; Haruna would ask her about it later.

"Is he sufficiently 'enchanting', Haruhi-sama?" Hearing no answer, she grinned. "Gimmie another! Don't leave me waiting."

Kyon was the next to speak up. "You can make objects too? How about a lightsaber?"

"Pfft, I thought you were going to give me a challenge, Kyon-san." Really, it wasn't; just a tube with a button, though she wasn't sure if it would have an active effect. While the angel wings she'd made for Asuna worked fine, she'd not thought about much beyond giving properties such as flight or extra personality tweaks. Could her artifact be that general, that powerful?

She took the summoned metal tube, weighing it in her hand. Seemed like the real thing, but she wanted to check. She thumbed the button, making very sure it aimed away from her face. The snap-hiss-hum she remembered from the film gave her a very special thrill, and from the look of it, so did Kyon. Testing with a hair and seeing it incinerated when it reached the green, glowing blade indicated that, yes, it was fully functional. Deactivating it, she handed it to him. "It's not your father's but it'll do, won't it?" Kyon nodded dumbly.

Mind still processing the possibilities, she turned to Itsuki.

"I... really don't have a wish, Haruna-san", he said. "Although... could you make something that broke the laws of reality?" Off her 'really?' smile, he added, "I meant break them more substantially. Something that could see through time?"

That gave her pause. She thought for a solid minute about how exactly to accomplish it, before giving up and scrawling a chunky metallic oblong with buttons, and 'sees through time' in its list of properties.

'After all, if it doesn't work now, I might be able to make it work later with more testing', she thought.

"Come forth, Time Television!" The object dropped into her hand, surprisingly heavy for its size. "Give it a try, Itzuki-san!"

He accepted it off her, quickly working out the VCR-like controls under the screen. Haruna also noted Mikuru regarding it warily - normally, she wouldn't have taken her as the time-traveller, too spacey. Itsuki would be the esper, then.

It showed... the room, viewpoint about a metre above Itsuki's head. Holding down the rewind button only seemed to show the moment of its creation, while fast-forwarding only showed the present. He frowned. "It seems there are some laws even you are not immune to, Haruna-san."

"I'll give you that, but there's more. I also gave it the ability to see through space." She pointed out a miniature crystal ball embedded in the back. "Place your hand on that and think about moving to the place you want to view." Instantly, the view zipped out to show a busy crossroads. Odd, she'd have chosen something different, but he seemed to relax some. This group seemed to spend a lot of time on edge.

That left the most mysterious and monosyllabic member of the group. Yuki had been watching each member like a hawk as they played with their toys, but now she had turned her attention to Haruna, and she felt a little intimidated by the anticipation in that steady gaze. What would an alien - even if she was a human interface to an alien - want?

"Haruna-san, please create six cubes, 10cm per side, of iron, each summoned separately. Then repeat with cubes of copper, iron, boron, carbon, and two more elements of your choice."

Oh, science. She should have known. She got to work, taking a sip of tea in the middle when the cries of "Come forth!" were drying her throat out, and Yuki soon had 16 cubes floating casually in front of her. As a little joke, the last two were Adamantium and G-Stone. Haruna noted the minute, yet adorable frown on the alien girl's face as she studied them, then the artist.

"I do not understand. The elements I asked you for all drained some of that energy from the link and from yourself, yet it took the same amount each time, far less than even exotic matter requires to sustain itself. Only... they are continuing to drain energy from the link. The two you thought up are draining much more than that - five to ten times more - but fast decreasing, being damped down by the dimensional construct on the pad. It is probably a safety feature. The energy itself makes very little sense. Simply ignoring mass-from-energy is..." She looked a little lost. "It is quite vexing."

So the more fantastic objects disappearing was a safety feature? She supposed it made sense - if the mage powered her artifact, it would be stupid if it sucked the mage dry the first time it summoned something big. Negi's reserves were staggering (according to Eva, via Konoka), but she was glad the card wouldn't let her hurt her teacher.

"It's OK, Yuki-chan. You've still helped me discover something. Thank you!" She swore the girl brightened up at that. Kyon just-so-happened to be looking at both of them, and he smiled a little as well. Beyond him she could see the Naki-construct... bending down towards Haruhi's lips? Oh no no, not while there were witnesses. Hadn't she specified it to keep a respectable distance?

"Naki!" It froze, looking guilty. "Sorry, Haruhi-sama, my golems occasionally escape my control." She desummoned her artifact to save doing them individually; that was a definite pout on Haruhi's face as her shojou eye-candy disappeared into sparkles.

Meanwhile, Itsuki had looked worried just after the time TV disappeared, but he covered it well. Leaning in close to Kyon (mmm) to whisper in his ear (mm-hmm) about some brotherly adventure- no, wait, mind out of the gutter, Kyon did not look that happy about whatever Itsuki had told him. If she had to make a leap, there was something about Haruhi being unhappy that had changed something, perhaps relating to the intersection.

Well, if the leader needed to be kept busy, perhaps she could help her new hosts?
 
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