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Amelia, Worm AU [Complete]

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by TanaNari, Jan 10, 2015.

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  1. Daunmi

    Daunmi Shun the sun, night so nice

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    Transcendent bluff. It's so much a bluff that it's wrapped around itself countless times, and now has the freedom to choose to be whatever it wants to be.

    I don't remember where these were mentioned, care to link or provide the chapter?
     
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  2. cosoco

    cosoco Not too sore, are you?

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    extra "
    I think this part would benefit form some formatting to frame the thought.
    extra .
    extra newline
    missing newlines

    Prediction: Nothing will go wrong, and Beth will be happier because of it.
     
  3. Slayer Anderson

    Slayer Anderson Orthodox Heretic

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    Alrighty, it's been a while since I've done this and I feel bad when I don't give awesome authors enough feedback...

    ...Ack, if you're reading this, I really love your work too, but so many people give you feedback compared to TanaNari it makes me feel less bad.

    Anyway, I'm really enjoying how you're breaking things up with the social drama and the endbringer attacks. For a moment there I was getting a little bored with the progression of the endbringers, but you mixed it up nicely with Beelzebub especially. The visceral horror of having to execute human beings like that really brought home the trauma of a battle like that, rather than the somewhat monotonous 'battle scenes' that the endbringer attacks had been devolving to.

    Since I haven't commented in so long, I'll also point out that I really like what you're doing with the Dragon and Japan sub-plots. So many authors have just defaulted to the 'free-Dragon-immediately' route that it's become a bit too well-trodden. Ack's stories generally make it interesting, but seeing people struggle over the tactical and strategic concerns of unleashing Dragon is interesting in and of itself. The Japanese Emperor is mostly an open-ended plot-line right now, but I'm very interested to see how it unfolds. The way the characters react and try to puzzle out whether the boy is, in fact, the Emperor or merely a powerful cape having taken his place...wow, that'll be something to see. Now that Lily is a publicly known unmasked cape, her life is probably a great deal different...and liable to get even stranger given how people have been treating her. Seeing Sabah and Lily get back together...well, I'm feeling that there's a lot more to it than you're letting on, but that's a really good method to explore the characters, so I'll be looking forward to how that develops too.

    On the Missy/Riley/Theo Triple (since they're not a couple), I'll be honest, I'm afraid of getting diabetes here. There just so cute. That said, I'm really looking forward to (if ever) them getting revealed as a romantic threesome. Aceso/Lachesis/Horus would make the front page of nearly every newspaper in America...especially if someone manages to put together Theo Anders and his father Max. Still, it's a fairly unlikely reveal given how often they get back to Earth Bet for recreational purposes.

    Taylor and Amelia aren't getting as much spotlight lately, but given the amount of detail seen by the other characters, I'm not sure if that's a criticism or a compliment, given how well the story is progressing without either of them as the primary viewpoint.

    ...and do I see a bit of GL/Crystal in the works? I may just be wearing shipping goggles, but I think there's some chemistry there.

    Hmm...that's all I've got for now. I could comment on Vicky/Chevalier, but...so many people have already commented on them...

    Anyway, stay awesome TanaNari.
     
  4. Hexed999

    Hexed999 I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Schrodinger's bluff
     
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  5. Leonidas333

    Leonidas333 Well-Known Murderhobo

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    I have to ask, are there people who actually say this in real life? Maybe its because I grew up reading so much, but I pretty much can't say that out loud, because I know it will tempt fate.
     
  6. Hexed999

    Hexed999 I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Occasionally people do, then everybody yells at them.
     
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  7. Ack

    Ack (Verified Ratbag) (Unverified Great Old One)

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    When I read the bit about Beth being on meds, my mind immediately went "Really? Hey, Amy!"

    Because, in the Pantheon, We Can Fix That Shit.

    Even if the powers are causing part of it, it shouldn't be too hard to cause the rest of the brain to be just a little overconfident, to compensate.

    Oooh yeah, let's modify dat brain! Whooo!
     
  8. Daunmi

    Daunmi Shun the sun, night so nice

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    I say it a fair bit. Always after jokingly suggesting something that has likely and clearly negative results, so I suppose that doesn't count.


    Yeah, that's more what I was going for, but I forgot what to call it :(
     
    Leonidas333 likes this.
  9. SwiftRosenthal

    SwiftRosenthal Connoisseur.

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    worm.jpg

    [I used up all my wit in responding to other threads, so this part is just here so the post can't be considered chan-like behavior.]
     
  10. pepperjack

    pepperjack A Variety of Cheese

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    Or grow a gland in the brain that secretes a superior version of the medication as needed.

    Well, it was. And then you said that.
     
  11. cosoco

    cosoco Not too sore, are you?

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    You could add a gland that automatically secretes alcohol.
    Or that. That's probably a better solution.
     
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  12. Coruscant Knave

    Coruscant Knave 'Twas love that did this to you.

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    Yeesh, poor girl needs to check her neurosis. You are in the room, ya know. The Sabah & Lily Show marches on! Also, I'm tentatively counting this as a step toward the threesome. Yes, I read all that straight nonsense just like I read it last time it came up!
     
    TanaNari likes this.
  13. gatewaewanderer

    gatewaewanderer Wandering Fool & Intermediate Lurker

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    Other people have been wondering if this is a bluff or red herring, or double or triple bluff, but I've got a dismal prediction I hope is wrong...
    Pantheon's first, and hopefully only, artificial Endbringer.
     
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  14. Divabot

    Divabot KILL ALL THE HUMANS

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    As long as the result sucks. That's the important bit.
     
  15. tordg

    tordg (Unverified Idiot)

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    Doublequote should be a period.
    Me too.
    And at long long last this plotline gets properly opened! We've been waiting for this since... the founding of Pantheon?
    Incidentally, the math on this is pretty interesting, for example, there are no quadruple bluffs because as soon as you start considering triple bluffs it becomes transcendent. Hence, the structure of Rock Paper Scissors and most fighting games.
     
    TanaNari likes this.
  16. Finbar

    Finbar I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    So, Jailbroken Beth resembles the 'Ghost Army' from the 3rd Lord of the Rings movie?

    Seen from a distance, it's a mass of semi transpartent stuff that just rolls over everyone.
     
  17. Masked Menace

    Masked Menace Making the rounds.

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    I have just got back from a week of no internet and have caught up again. I'm sad now.
     
  18. Daunmi

    Daunmi Shun the sun, night so nice

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    Why do people keep suggesting that they're going to jailbreak Beth's shard connection? Unless the parahuman thingy in her brain has connections to the part of her brain where the social anxiety disorder is being generated, they shouldn't need to touch it at all, otherwise everyone in Pantheon would have broken connections to their powers, because all of them have had the way they think modified.
     
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  19. Bool1989

    Bool1989 The Cat that was Promised

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    so you're saying that it is both a bluff and not a bluff? so we wont know whether it is a bluff or not a bluff until we perceive it as either a bluff or not a bluff?
     
  20. Hexed999

    Hexed999 I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    yes
     
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  21. doomlord9

    doomlord9 Experienced.

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    I was thinking it would end up as a 'whoopsie' moment. They try to fix Beth's neurosis but didn't notice that her power references them each time it activates for a lower end baseline for how the summons act so meek, nervous Beth who doubts herself gives a squad of various fey and a self-assured, confident, headstrong Beth activating her power results in 'I AM THE FAIRY NATION, BOW BEFORE ME!'

    GU thinks it's cute and visits for tea every now and then.

    I was going for humor, we have five potential factions at the end of the world, Pantheon and CUI being the only ones truly expected to be there and Beth getting jailbroken could be a nation in her own right.

    Likely? No. Amusing to think about? Yes.
     
    Last edited: Mar 31, 2015
  22. ReoRak

    ReoRak Probably alive.

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    Depending on whether Cauldron and the Protectorate count as seperate factions for Dinah, there is at least one more earmarked for the end.
     
  23. Tisaku

    Tisaku Experienced.

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    It doesn't matter, merely uttering the phrase draws the attention of Murphy. Whether or not he hurls his +8 Monkey Wrench of Power is completely at His discretion.
     
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  24. SwiftRosenthal

    SwiftRosenthal Connoisseur.

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    At least they can no longer jailbreak Vicky's former power. "ALL SHALL LOVE ME AND DESPAIR!"
     
  25. Daunmi

    Daunmi Shun the sun, night so nice

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    Ah, ok.

    I've actually been wondering about the whole '5 factions' bit myself. Since the Endbringers are being taken care of (somewhat) and Pantheon has been clearly showing the world that working together in synergy is the way to go, I wonder if that possible future is even still on the cards? Especially since at this point there's no chance, that I can see, that Taylor and Amelia will be in different factions.
     
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  26. doomlord9

    doomlord9 Experienced.

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    With just a brief glance at human history, I would say that the 5 faction future is even more likely the more successful Pantheon is.

    Yes synergy is the way to go for Ultimate Power! but that just means that more groups will do the same so that they alone will have the Ultimate Power! instead of having to defer to Pantheon or any other group, the 5 factions are only the ones who were successful at it.
     
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  27. dasstan

    dasstan :)

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    The problem with people using power synergy to get ultimate power is that outside of Pantheon and the CUI, there aren't very many parahumans that can facilitate it.
     
  28. powerofvoid

    powerofvoid Versed in the lewd.

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    [​IMG]
     
  29. TanaNari

    TanaNari Verified Dick

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    Guild. Protectorate. Several European nations. Thanda. Birdcage. Russia probably counts as a "European nation". The Elite. Those Nazi assholes whose name I can't spells without looking it up. Cauldron.

    And all that is off the top of my head.
     
  30. Daunmi

    Daunmi Shun the sun, night so nice

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    Cauldron (utilizing assistance from Pantheon) can do it. They wouldn't be a conflicting faction, since they don't care who wins as long as it's not Scion, though they may still be classed as their own faction as far as Dinah is concerned.

    Dragon (by which I mean all of the Dragons) might be her own, although she's in much the same boat as Cauldron (whilst she wants Scion to lose, she's a little more picky on who 'wins' and I doubt she'd help people like the CUI (CIU? whatever...) unless it was absolutely necessary. So she could be another faction if Dinah can see multiple singular entities as their own faction (which she possibly can, since she saw Taylor separate from Amelia and if that's because Taylor had taken the canon Khepri route it's a lot like Dragon controlling multiples of herself, sort of).

    The Thanda were supposed to be conducting their own synergy tests, weren't they? And they tended to have pretty powerful capes available to them.

    We've got no idea what the capes in the Birdcage have been doing, but they were watching a few Endbringer fights before that got canned, so they may have picked up on it themselves.

    Various 'eastern' countries could have a large selection of powers to draw on, though I can't make guesses here since we know virtually nothing about them.

    The African warlords, perhaps? They have a large interest in not being taken out by foreign powers, and it would be interesting if the actions of Pantheon have made Africa a better place simply because everyone there is getting along more just in case Pantheon decides to pay them a visit.

    Really, any significantly large landmass will generate enough parahumans that there's a high chance some will come along that have broken combinations, or at least can be used together to be massively more useful then if not.

    *Edit*
    Damn it, TanaNari! How dare you quote the things I quote and respond to the things I respond to in your own thread!
     
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