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Is it mercy to put down a mute songbird? (DDLC)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by vixenHunter, Jun 27, 2018.

  1. Threadmarks: 1.1

    vixenHunter Your first time is always over so quickly, isn't it?

    May 3, 2017
    Likes Received:
    Hey everyone. vixenHunter here, first time poster + occasional lurker + amateur writer. I've had a few plot bunnies running around in my head for a while now. Figured I should go ahead and give 'em a place to live, specially since there isn't much about Doki Doki Literature Club. Last thing, I'll be aiming to post at least once a week, although I make no promises. Hope you enjoy!

    The sound of a door opening woke me up. That didn’t feel out of the ordinary, but there was something very strange about this instance.

    For one, I had no idea where I was or whose bed this belonged to.

    And secondly, a pair of slender arms pulled me up into an uncomfortably tight hug. It was a shocking thing that made it hard for me to breathe or think properly. Hard, but not impossible. Pushing against the fuzziness in my head, I began to make sense of two things: the brown, disheveled hair in my face and the steady, wet sobbing against my chest.

    Without any input from me, my arms wrapped themselves around what I started to realize was a crying young woman. The way her blue jeans and white spaghetti shirt were filled gave it away. I could feel my heart quickening at the thought. She was undoubtedly pretty, but this didn’t seem like the time or place for such a reaction. There was also the faint scent of ink and vanilla about her that was distractingly familiar, but no matter how hard I tried to, I couldn’t remember why. Despite my worries, I felt my shoulders loosing tension and I leaned into her a bit more. She was … nice, warm. So warm, in fact, that for a brief moment, I saw the two of us basking in the tranquility for days, weeks, months... How easy it would be to surrender into the comfort, forever.

    This... it… whatever was happening wasn’t right, though! An unfamiliar room, a stranger, and weird feelings. Something was wrong, very wrong. I could tell that much.

    But... it felt good. I felt good. Were things really so wrong? Odd, sure, but, dangerous? Perhaps that’s why my heart was beating so fast. A warning.

    Any further thoughts I had froze as the stranger pushed us away to an arm’s length and looked up. She wasn’t sobbing anymore. Instead, she was taking steadying deep breathes. One of her hands was still tightly clutching what was apparently my hospital gown but the other was wiping away at her tears. She succeed for the most part but the tiny spots of ruined makeup, the last of her tears, and pale-blushing complexion left her face blotchy. A direct contrast to the confidence she was building.

    It was her eyes, however, that captivated me and made my heart jutter in place. Surprised, vulnerable, happy, round, sad, wavering, fearful, achingly beautiful and so, so green. They were so expressive and so amazing that I couldn't look away.

    We stayed like that, staring at each other for what must have been seconds but felt much longer. The first thought that entered my mind was about how glad I was I hadn’t been breathing. There’s no telling what things I would’ve said at such a sight.

    A part of me thought it’d be something stupid.

    The rest of me agreed quite quickly.

    Her voice, quite carefully, interrupted my musing, “Do you remember?”

    Did I remember? Remember what exactly? I mean, I… couldn’t think of my name, or where I came from, or... who I was.

    I… What?

    Oh, my arms were shaking..

    I felt the stranger pull me back into a hug. This one was much gentler, but the warmth, it was missing. There was only a desolate chill oozing through me. “It’s okay. Everything’s going to be okay.”

    I wanted to trust her, but I couldn’t. How could I when I didn’t know anything about myself, let alone this… person.

    Something ugly must have shown in my face because the stranger flinched. Before I could do anything, the stranger pushed herself against me and toppled us onto the bed. We were so close now, our noses almost touching, that I could see there was something not quite authentic in her eyes. I didn’t have time to dwell on that though. With her long hair blocking everything in sight except for her face, she spoke, clearly, undeniably, “Your name, it’s Jay.”

    Something clicked after her declaration. Like a puzzle piece fitting into place, I felt… No, I knew I was more complete. More whole. More… me.

    I took a deep breath, tasting it as if for the first time and noticed that she was still talking. She was explaining what happened but too fast for me to understand. Words like accident, doctors, and memories were repeated frequently. Something like understanding was forming itself in my mind, but the more pressing concern was that tears were starting to fall from those beautiful eyes again.

    I brought up a hand, pushing past a lot of softness,to just between our cheeks.

    She fell silent.

    I brushed a strand of her hair back into place.

    As her eyes widened, I asked, “And, are you the angel that kept me safe?”

    That caught my kind stranger by surprise. I could see the moment her masked confidence bled away into confusion and incredulity. But then I smiled and her eyes, they filled with understanding, acceptance. With hope.

    A little smile graced her lips as she sat upright. “I’m glad you kept your charm.” With a playful sigh and a twinkle in her eyes, she said, “I’m afraid I’m no angel though. I’m just Monika.
  2. Anonymous chicken

    Anonymous chicken Getting some practice in, huh?

    Jul 26, 2018
    Likes Received:

    Your grammar and pacing is spot on, if this is your first time writing a story then you should definitely keep at it, you're quite talented.

    Ive always been a sucker for DDLC fanfics, so I'm certainly looking forward to seeing you continue this.

    Hope you've had a great "whatever it is you celebrate at this time of year".