SALLY not SALLY (a broken SI in the Archie Sonic setting)

[Tangent]

She had a penis? Or are you talking about the missing boob?

Click to shrink...

It's the missing boob.

Has anyone invented a good ablative armor to take on the role of skin to protect the rest of their probably-harder-to-replace material from damage? (Who's willing to actually supply it, I mean; Eggman having a design in his noggin doesn't help anyone)

Click to shrink...

Robians can wear clothing and armor. They just usually don't for various reasons.

And Eggman's solution to the issue (when he bothers, given that he tends to treat Robians as disposable units) involves extensive body modification. Such as when he stripped down Mecha Sally to rebuild her as Metal Sally in the comics.

Snively: "Um... Shouldn't you turn the pain receptors off?"

Dr. Robotnik: "Why bother? I'm not going to feel a thing!"

 

[Navrin]

Robians can wear clothing and armor. They just usually don't for various reasons.

Click to shrink...

Not really the same kind of job that I'm thinking of. I'm thinking more along the lines of how paint is used for metal structures/vehicles, but preferably better. (Less tedious, protects against a wider range of damage, etc)

 

[Tangent]

Not really the same kind of job that I'm thinking of. I'm thinking more along the lines of how paint is used for metal structures/vehicles, but preferably better. (Less tedious, protects against a wider range of damage, etc)

Click to shrink...

Oh that - depending on the roboticizer model used, most Robians actually start with that as a default. It used to be the top layer of skin and fur they had as a Mobian,plus whatever they had been wearing at the time. And Peggy is missing more than just that layer...

 

[Tangent]

SALLY not SALLY
Chapter 21
A broken SI fic by Tangent​

---

"Sorry, Rose, but I can't," Peggy Puma stated apologetically as she turned down the sample bottle of flavored cooking oil that I had offered her. "Not that I don't appreciate the thought - I hate the flavor of motor oil as much as any other Robian that still has a sense of taste. Unfortunately, I need a more… robust lube that's less prone towards oxidation and acidification. My filtration systems aren't what they used to be. I can't handle the transition from one type of lube to another anymore."

"Oh…" I hadn't realized that this might be an issue. For some reason I had gotten it into my head that Robians could basically last forever since we were so rugged. But I guess we aren't immune to aging after all…

"Yep! The fat bastard decided to rip out my original Robian filter system and replace it with one designed to lube mecha."

That wasn't what I had been thinking at all! Also, ow! I was wincing just from imagining the pain Peggy must have been put through from that process! I know Eggman doesn't bother shutting off pain receptors!

"Yeah, that had hurt like Hell," Peggy admitted easily. "Not that I could react to the pain at all - not with that stupid program forcing me to serve and obey the tub o' lard. And by that, I mean the original Robotnik, not the one from another Zone that replaced him. It wasn't even necessary at the time - he was just testing if swapping out my lube system with one for a bigger bot would improve my performance enough for him to bother doing it to other large Robians. I've been stuck unable to tolerate anything but synthetic lube that tastes awful ever since."

"That's…"

"Don't get me wrong - I can handle flavored motor oil," Peggy continued. "But it's gotta be motor oil, and it's gotta be synthetic."

"Um…"

"And yes, I'm deliberately talking over you," Peggy pointed out cheerfully. "Have you unnoticed that you basically shut up whenever somebody else is talking? You might want to work on that."

"Hey! I'm half introvert, dammit!" I protested vehemently, turning my head away with a huff of embarrassed frustration even as Peggy started to laugh her ass off.

Jerk.

If she wasn't such a good friend, I'd…

---

In the end, Bernie's samples went over pretty well with the others at Robian in Motion.

Even if only half of the staff and clients had to drink their particular lubricants. And of those, roughly a fifth either couldn't use cooking oils or actually preferred the flavor of motor oil.

"Beep boop, fellow Robians! I hope this day has found you functional and full of purpose!"

I'm pretty sure that Robbie the Rabbit is just a straight up robot. I mean, to be fair, there may be a small chance that he used to be a Mobian, but let's face it, even a heavily damaged and modified Robian still looks enough like the Mobian they used to be to be recognizable. Robbie looks more like the vague idea of a rabbit than like an actual Robian that used to be a rabbit subtype Mobian. Like somebody had just bolted a bunch of boxy parts together in a way that suggested rabbit to whoever built him.

"Beep boop, salutations, [identified] Autumn Rose Acorn! Go, [sports team mention here] Sports team!"

I just leveled a look at Robbie, which he ignored. About the only thing I was sure about Robbie the Rabbit was that he wasn't an Eggman or Snively spybot. Both of them had more pride in their work than this nonsense.

Meh, whatever. We aren't supposed to judge each other in Robians in Motion, so as long as Robbie wasn't actually causing trouble or bothering anybody, I forced myself to let it go.

And hey, I suppose that even robots could use motion therapy sometimes.

Now where was I?

Besides in Robian in Motion on a Tuesday, I mean.

Dammit! I lost my train of thought!

Thanks a lot, Robbie! That might have been important!

---

Somebody in New Mobotropolis placed an order for a baker's dozen of assorted donuts from Hoot Thorntons. Which was weird.

"Isn't there a perfectly serviceable Donut Joe's in New Mobotropolis?" I asked Hoot as he handed me the receipt, manifest, and the box of donuts.

"I know, I know, it's weird to me too," the owl said as he watched me carefully strap the box behind the seat of The Blue Rose. "Either I made a really good impression on somebody there, or Joe managed to piss someone off badly enough to make a point of ordering from out of town just to spite him."

"Takes all types, I guess," I shrugged, then mounted my hoverbike.

Eh, mobiums were mobiums, and I didn't mind doing a small job like this for cheap rather than Hoot having to pay for a truck to deliver just one order of donuts.

Besides, it got me out of town and away from my new stalker for a while.

Robbie the Rabbit was really trying my patience recently.

You know, I wouldn't be particularly bothered by Robbie if I only ever saw him in Robian in Motion and a few other places. He's distinct enough that being noticeable wouldn't be so noticeable if he didn't keep popping up in places I was either traveling to or through more and more for the past few days. It was creepy and a bit off putting.

Especially when I spotted him somewhere where I had no reason to expect him to be, such as walking along the shore of the lake I was riding The Blue Rose over on my way to Mobotropolis.

Okay, enough of this. He's definitely stalking, but I'm pretty sure that I could defend myself from one poorly made robot with semi-functional programming. So, I turned to fly closer to the shore.

"Robbie," I called out as I got close. I stayed out over the water in case he was trying to lure me close to the trees for an ambush. "Why are you following me?'

Wait, was that something big and yellow under the water?

"[Initiate distraction]: Look! An obvious distraction!" Robbie called out.

"Wait, what?" What the Hell was Robbie going on about? What distra…

I was answered before I had even finished the thought as a huge net made of cables and weights shot out of the water below me, entangling me to my hoverbike and anchoring me to…

Another hoverbike emerging from the water? How? The Blue Rose can't do that (it's not submersible). And it wasn't the same model. The front end swept upwards. It was mostly gold with blue accents. And it was being ridden by a purple weasel wearing boots, a vest, a bush-hat…

…and a scuba mask that he was just now taking off? Where the fuck was the air tank!? How did that even work without a breathing tube!?

Wait - not important right now - maybe if I wriggle a bit to try to loosen the net?

"I gotta say, Toots, I don't know why the Doc wants you, but he's payin' me really well, so thanks for being so easily distractable."

"Nack!" I spat out. "Let me go right now!"

"Nah…" he denied calmly, disengaging the tow cable at his end and letting it drop as he fished something out of a pouch.

Okay, I think I can sort of reach the controls…

I barely got my fingers of my left hand around one of the handlebar grips when I noticed a small disc arc through the air and clamp itself to my thigh. There was a spark of electricity and a bit of pain - then a burst of electricity and my entire world was pain!

And then I felt no pain at all as the world faded to silence and blessed darkness…

Spoiler: Robbie the Rabbit

Spoiler: Robbie the Rabbit

Built by Bean the Dynamite, if you must know...

 

[Tangent]

SALLY not SALLY
Chapter 22
A broken SI fic by Tangent​

---

> Primary systems online.
> Optics... Recalibrating… OK.
> Audio receptors... Recalibrating… OK.
> Haptic feedback system… OK.
> Locomotion servos... OK.
> Observation suite... Online.
> Personality core check... Anomalous parameters detected.
> Memory archive check… Fragmented.
> Memory archive reconstruction… incomplete.
> Boot sequence complete.

If I had a mobium for every time I saw that boot up sequence…

Well, I'd have two mobiums, but it's weird that it happened twice.

Ugh… I have a splitting headache. What the heck hit me? What had I been doing?

Scratch that - why am I bundled up like a sushi roll and being hauled through the air on the back of what I can only assume to be somebody else's hoverbike? Because this certainly isn't The Blue Rose.

I tried wriggling a bit. Carefully, mind you - I had no interest in falling off the back of a hoverbike flying at this speed and altitude. I may have been able to fall three stories and bellyflop into a lawn without hurting anything but my pride, but this situation had different variables. I just wanted to see if I could wriggle an arm to where it could be useful…

The answer to which apparently being: No, I could not. Whoever secured me knew what they were doing and my movement was severely restricted. Wrists together behind my back. Ankles together and secured to my wrists. Knees together. Some sort of gag structure strapped into and across my mouth. And I was wrapped up - as previously mentioned - like a sushi roll.

With enough time, effort, and a lack of supervision, I guessed that I might be able to get myself out of these restraints…

Through sheer persistence if for no other reason. I had enough confidence in my own durability to believe that sheer wear and tear would eventually cause my current restraints to fail. I just needed them to fail within a useful window of time.

Y'know, like sometime before Nack turned me over to Dr. Robotnik for the bounty.

Which raised another question: Why was Dr. Robotnik so interested in capturing me that he was willing to offer a bounty for my capture? I mean, sure, most of the Freedom Fighters and several of Eggman's other enemies also have bounties that would-be bounty hunters sometimes go for, but why set one up for me?

And why Nack (and possibly the rest of the Hooligans) and not Lien-Da or some of the other Dark Egg Legion elites?

Okay, that was a dumb question. He didn't use them because he doesn't trust them with anything they might be able to turn against him in a useful manner. The Hooligans don't have that issue.

So, what is it about me, specifically, that Dr. Eggman considers to be important enough to capture but too… whatever… to entrust to the Dark Egg Legion?

…

I'm drawing a blank here, unless it's an ego thing and he just wants to find out why I didn't automatically obey him. Which is dumb.

I chewed on the gag mostly for something else to do while trying to escape and figure out why this was happening. I mean, sure, I had vague memories from Sally about having been captured by Nack before and slowly being able to talk herself into a situation she had been able to take advantage of and escape. But given how overboard my gag was, it was clear to me that Nack remembered that failure all too keenly himself and wasn't willing to risk a repeat by listening to me.

Which, okay, way to be a badass, Sis, but damn it was proving to be a pain in the ass now.

Okay, I don't see the side car attachment on this side of the Marvelous Queen (which didn't mean that the other side car wasn't attached either - gotta keep that in mind). I also didn't see or hear The Blue Rose, nor any conversation. So either Bark and Bean had their own rides or Nack was doing this mission solo.

Robbie the Rabbit being part of the mission didn't prove anything - he could have been bought as a mission expense, either Nack or Bean might have built him, or he could have just been an incredibly unfortunate Robian with a severe Ship of Theseus issue and Cave Johnson as a mechanic…

Okay, put a pin in that one for a while, as it's not worth worrying about.

---

We had been flying west for a while now, having left the mountains and valleys of the Great Forest behind in favor of rolling hills, grasslands, recovering farmland, and occasional grove, village, small town, or shattered ruins. Past the vast, broken ruins of the former Overlander capitol of Megalopolis (there were other Overlander cities, but Megalopolis was the one Dr. Robotnik had made a point of rendering uninhabitable) and past what I assumed from the sheer size to be Lake Michigan.

Okay, for all I knew it could have been either Lake Erie or Lake Ontario Instead - I will not claim to be an expert in judging scale while trussed up and being hauled behind the seat of a hoverbike like a hunter's prize, but we were flying more west than north, meaning that had likely been Lake Michigan.

Eventually, the Marvelous Queen swerved to the right and angled down towards some location I couldn't see just yet because I was facing to the left. Not that it was a great mystery for long. I mean, there was the Eggmobile (or rather an Eggmobile as I think the one we commandeered on our way out of the Death Egg II was still parked in the New Mobotropolis impound lot) being guarded by a swatbot. Some other vehicles that gave off a sort of Mad Max or Car Wars aesthetic, only in bubblegum pop colors…

Oh my God, when did the Care Bears go punk?

Oh, and there were some regular vehicles there too - the ones I had mentioned were just the standouts.

The sign on the building identified the place as The Blank Stare Bar 'n' Grill. The outside lights were dim and flickering. The inside was a bizarre mix of boisterous laughter and melancholy shrouded in a smokey haze that was half burnt cooking and half anti-smoking add. And Nack just walked right on in with me over his shoulder as if none of the tough customers and…

Oh my God! Those were knock-off Care Bears! Candy colored fur, images on their bellies, and everything!

Okay, the leather jackets, cigarettes, and alcohol were definitely off brand, but this was Mobius Prime. What else would I expect?

"I see that you were successful, Nack," I heard Dr. Robotnik before I saw him. He was sitting at a corner table flanked by a pair of swatbot bodyguards, with a literal pile of questionable food on his plate. Mostly finished, from the look of things, but he was still eating. Or at least had been before Nack plopped me onto the table like a sack of potatoes.

"I trust that you have the other half of our payment?" Nack asked as he casually leaned against one of the tall seats until one of the staff hurried over with a booster seat. Mind you, I had figured that either Overlanders or larger Mobians were part of the regular customer base anyway due to the size of some of the tables.

"After I see what condition she's in, Nack," Dr. Robotnik admonished. "I'm not paying full price for damaged goods when the contract specified that she be captured intact."

"Yeah yeah, I get ya," Nack huffed at the implication, but cut ties binding the tarp I was wrapped in and unfurled it, rolling me right into a platter of gravy covered hashbrowns, sauce covered ribs, and other greasy and not at all healthy foods.

Dude, you're going to get as fat as your predecessor if you keep eating like this, I thought as I glared at Dr. Robotnik and utterly failed to spontaneously develop telepathy to convey my scorn.

Probably just as well, as I'm sure that the terror I was feeling right now would have also gone through.

"There ya go, Doc: One Robian lookalike of the Princess; no damage; trussed up and ready to go," Nack proclaimed as he…

DID HE JUST PAT MY ASS!?

The assholes laughed as I immediately started flopping around like a fish as I ineffectually attempted to attack Nack while my wrists and ankles were still tied firmly to each other behind my back.

"As feisty as your counterpart, I see," Dr. Dobotnik declared and I glared at him again. "Very well, Nack, I will take this as proof that she is sufficiently undamaged. Swatbot 7742, pay the weasel. Swatbot 6647, pick up Mecha Sally. We're leaving."

 

[Nobodym8]

Something is up with the text color. I'm in dark mode fyi

 

[Tangent]

Something is up with the text color. I'm in dark mode fyi

Click to shrink...

Did that fix it? I had some issues posting it and had to pick a text color, but that seems to have resolved itself, so I put it back on default.

 

[Navrin]

Suggestions:

or rather an Eggbobile

Click to shrink...

Eggmobile

was still parked in the New Mobotorpolis impound

Click to shrink...

Mobotropolis

Mind you, Ihad

Click to shrink...

Add space between I and had.
End of suggestions

I get the feeling that adding additional communication equipment is going to be a high priority for Autumn Rose now. Maybe a good radio.

 

[Tangent]

Station of canon?

What station of canon?

SALLY not SALLY
Chapter 23
A broken SI fic by Tangent​

---

"I see that you've acquired that weird Robian that looks like Princess Sally," Lien-Da commented just after I saw her peek into the robotics lab I was secured in and then lean nonchalantly against the door frame.

"The Mecha Sally, you mean," Dr. Robotnik huffed dismissively as he finished double checking the restraints of the God damned Robian Service Seat that he had ordered the swatbot to secure me in. It was burgundy and industrial grey, just like the one in the hospital, and unlike the one in the hospital…

"Test: one…" Dr. Robotnik stated blandly as he hit a switch.

"HngnNGnnGnNg!" PAIN! pain! pAin! paiN! PaIn! PAIN!

"Pain inducers seem to be functional…"

OhgodithurtssomuchIcan'ttellwho'stalkingwhereamIwhydoesithurtsomuchmommyI'mhurt!

And then the eternity of agonizing pain stopped so abruptly that I slumped and my head rolled to one side as my consciousness swam unsteadily in my head.

It had been just like a switch had been flipped off and the pain just wasn't there anymore - which, of course, was exactly what had happened.

Lien-Da had the grace to look disturbed for a moment, but only for just that moment before resuming her normal resting bitchface. "Is there an actual point to that? I mean, I could understand it if that actually was the Princess - tormenting your enemies when you have them in your clutches is half the fun. But this is just a copy."

Bitch, when I get out of this, I'm gonna slap you so hard that…

…

Okay, still having a bit of trouble with the thinky-thinky after all that pain.

"Actually, if I'm right (and I probably am), this is the original Princess Sally."

"So the other one is a fake?" Lien-Da asked.

"No," Dr. Robotnik denied. "She is also the original."

"Are you going to start making sense any time soon?" Lien-Da snarked.

"I ran an… Let's call it an experiment… a few weeks ago," Dr. Robotnik explained. "One that went very wrong and had produced some unexpected anomalous results. This Mecha Sally was one of them."

You mean you goofed up with the World Roboticizer and the Genesis Wave Device, but you aren't gonna explain either of those to Lien-Da because you don't want her to know about what you almost did before Sonic stopped you.

"If you're right," Lien-Da noted.

"If I'm right, yes," Dr. Robotnik agreed.

"Anyway, i just thought that you'd be interested in knowing that Snively has been in contact with Regina Ferrum again and is trying to keep it a secret," Lien-Da reported in an off-hand manner.

"I'll be dealing with Snively soon enough," Dr. Robotnik said dismissively. "Now, since you seem to have nothing better to do than bother me and try to fish for information, grab a rag and clean off Mecha Sally here. She still has food on her from when Nack delivered her to me."

Lien-Da glared at Dr. Robotnik, no doubt furious about being put to such a menial task when she's the current Grandmaster of the Dark Egg Legion.

Well, sucks to be you, you tool…

---

"Interesting…" Dr. Robotnik commented as he checked various reading on the equipment he hooked me up to. "There are definitely traces of Genesis Wave Energy in your system. Between that and the fact that your Zone resonance matches Mobius Prime, you are indeed the original Princess Sally Alicia Acorn. You must have popped in right when I activated the World Roboticizer."

That's not quite what happened, you demented goofball, but sure - let's go with that.

"Of course, Sonic had to somehow show up anyway despite not existing in the glorious new Mobius I made. And naturally screwed up so badly that he ended up pulling a resonance echo of the Sally you had been forward into this iteration."

Oh, God, is he going to speculate and hypothesize, or is he just going to prattle on and feed his own ego!? Just shut up already! I get it! Your Ego makes the Death Egg look small!

"It must really burn your gears," Dr. Robotnik commented. "To have left all your friends behind in that other iteration of the world. To have some blue freak just swoop on in and take your world away to replace it with ours…"

Wait? That's your angle!? Buddy, you don't know me at all!

"And to have no place here, because there's already a Princess Sally. And she's just as real as you, and has everything that could have been yours."

Get a clue, you fruitloop! I'm not you! God! Sally and I resolved that on the first day, you jackass!

"Well, fret not!" OhGod, he's going into his sales pitch. "For I, Dr. Julian Ivo Robotnik, will give you the ability to take back everything the other Sally took from you! And you will do it as one of my generals! As my Metal Sally!"

NO!

Nononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononono!

No fucking way in Hell!

I know what would have happened that day! I know what Metal Sally is and what becoming her means! From all the memories I inherited from Tangent, I know what that will do to me!

Somebody!

Anybody!

Save me!

I NEED A HERO!

I wept in relief when the alarms sounded and Dr. Robotnik rushed off to handle whatever situation turned up.

And then I struggled harder than ever before, straining my body past its limits in a desperate attempt to get out of this God damned chair before he came back!

---

I don't know how long I struggled to get out of that chair. The damn thing was very sturdy and both it and the restraints built into it were designed to hold Robians.

WHUMP!

What I did know was that I absolutely did NOT want to still be here when Dr. Robotnik returned!

There was a series of gunfire and explosions in the distance that I didn't really pay much of any attention to as I tried to twist my way out of the restraints.

Twenty percent. That was the threshold. A Robian could lose up to twenty percent of their original body and, as long as the result would be medically safe, still be restored to their Mobian state. I knew that. Sally knew that. Anyone with any experience at all in restoring Robians to Mobians knew that. And Dr. Robotnik certainly knew that.

More gunfire. More explosions. Maybe the Dark Egg Legion finally decided to risk betraying Dr. Robotnik?

Whatever - not important right now!

Because I also know that twenty percent is all that will be left of my original Robian body if I get rebuilt as Metal Sally! Not twenty percent gone - twenty percent remaining!

A black and gold blur of motion swooped into the room faster than my eyes could follow, only to resolve before me as…

"S'up, Beautiful? Come here often?"

Shard, you doof. I'm wearing a gag.

"He's in the labs!" I heard Lien-Da's voice call out.

"Whups! We gotta go!" Shard announced cheerfully as he…

DID HE JUST RIP MY CHAIR OUT OF THE FLOOR!?

You know what? Screw it. He's saving the day. I'm just going to let him have this.

 

[NitroNorm5688]

They always go for the straps.

Oldest trick in the book. You can't get out of the chair, so you fall over and the chair breaks. Or you end up on your toes doing the ballerina with the chair still attached to you as you make your way out the door.

This is me doing the thumbs up for Shard! Good Job!

 

[Tangent]

SALLY not SALLY
Chapter 24
A broken SI fic by Tangent​

---

I honestly had no idea how Shard had found me so fast, but I was very grateful that he had.

Mind you, I'd have been just a tad more grateful had he actually gotten me out of this chair or at least removed my gag first, but I guess he didn't want to risk hurting me by going too fast.

Which was kind of ironic given all of the badniks, Dark Egg Legionnaires, and mounted internal defences that were actively trying to shoot at us. And not so actively trying to avoid shooting anything that wasn't part of their subgroup.

"Ah, here we go!" Shard said as he ducked into an alcove with the chair I was in. "This should be safe enough for a few seconds…"

And in those few seconds Shard's deft, powerful hands had broken every single one of my restraints including the gag - and then we were on our way again even as bullets, blasters, and lasers riddled our position with holes.

"Now to find a way outa here," Shard commented.

So, I gave directions even as we flew through the corridors and maintenance ways at ludicrous speed. "Up! Up! Down! Down! Left! Right! Left! Right! Bay! Airlock!"

And we were outside of the Death Egg II just like that.

And in very short order, we made a rendezvous with a Freedom Fighter shuttle that was still approaching from the east.

"We gocha, Sugar," Bunnie d'Coolette said even as Shard handed me over to her and she guided me to a very different kind of seat. One without the restraints or pain inducers, or the threat of being mostly dismantled in order to be rebuilt as a weaponized slave…

Now that the danger had (mostly) passed, I started shaking and crying uncontrollably, broken sobs escaping me even as I released everything I had been desperately trying to suppress all at once.

Bunnie, Shard, and Sonic all looked at each other and nodded before Bunnie turned to her husband who was flying the shuttle.

"Get Rosie somewhere safe, Antoine," Bunnie ordered. "The boys and I got us an egg to fry."

And with that, the three left the transport shuttle and flew off towards the Death Egg II, with Bunnie carrying Sonic, even as Antione turned the shuttle around and started to fly back towards the Republic of Acorn…

---

The next day everyone in New Mobotropolis was celebrating the destruction of the Death Egg II, Shard was being repaired, and Sonic's arm was in a sling for a sprained elbow. Bunnie managed to not get hurt, but that was mostly because the fucking brand new Metal Sonic was trying to focus down on Shard first.

"And what did we learn?" I asked Shard even as Uncle Chuck was finalizing the attachments on his new left arm.

"That my replacement has bad manners and no sense of humor," Shard quipped and then fist-bumped Sonic.

"Okay, fair enough - I'll give you that," I acknowledged with an indulgent smile. "Now how did you guys find me so fast?"

"Oh, that one was easy, Sugar," Bunnie replied. "Once Bark and Bean were caught tryin' to pawn your very recognizable hoverbike and we got who had hired Nack from them, we knew there was only one place you could end up, and we still knew where the Death Egg was."

"Of course, I got there first!" Shard bragged.

"Only because you fly and I don't," Sonic quipped.

I sighed as the sheer weight of events settled on me in a different manner and I came to a realization.

"What is wrong, Rosie?" Antoine asked, immediately noticing the downward shift in my mood. "What is it that is troubling you so?"

"It's…" I hesitated, unsure how to say what I needed to say and convey the proper context. "I… It's… It's just… I…"

"You don't have to say anythin' Rosie," Bunnie assured me. "Just know that you ain't in this alone."

"Thank you," I sighed. "But that's not it. At least… not all of it. When I first manifested, part of me was Sally and part of me was Tangent, but I was always just… me. Well, me and an annoying tagalong who never shut up and wanted to use me to serve Robotnik. I didn't want to do that, but I didn't know how to be me either, so I just sorta followed Sally around, because it was safe. And if she was Sally, then I wasn't Sally. Which… honestly? It was kinda reassuring. Because while part of me was Sally, I didn't feel like I was actually Sally. So Sally being Sally and me not being Sally was sorta my thing. What I used to anchor myself."

I was quiet for a bit, but rather than filling the silence the others just patiently waited for me to gather my thoughts and speak again.

"Part of me was Tangent too, but not really," I continued eventually. "And not in the same way that I wasn't really Sally either. From Tangent I just knew things… If I remembered them, which… well, you know what I'm like. Some of which I didn't have any business knowing. A lot of it not quite right but just accurate enough to be sorta useful. But…"

I sighed again and sorta collapsed in on myself as I took a seat on the bench next to Shard. The Freedom Fighters were there, of course. As was Uncle Chuck, who was quietly working on repairing Shard.

And to be clear here, we were here visiting Shard, given that his social circle isn't actually all that big just yet. And I did not feel at all comfortable with taking the focus away from him. He's the one who took the brunt of his father's hatred and his brother's jealousy.

Yeah, Sally ended up ordering the Acorn Army to go and finish securing and dismantling the Death Egg II so that Dr. Robonik couldn't repair it again. Which got her into a row with the Council of Acorn about making that decision without consulting them. It took Hip and Hop, the current Judges appointed to head the new judicial branch to intervene and force a compromise. I didn't understand how it all settled, nor did I want to at this time, but it boiled down to the executive branch having to have at least some authority to initiate actions or why bother even having House Acorn as anything but figureheads.

Not my monkeys, not my circus. I had to get my own ducks in a row before I worried about anything else.

And my ducks are currently scattered all over the place.

---

Ultimately, we had to end our visit before anything other than Shard's repairs were resolved. Uncle Chuck had to get back to the Council - not because every member had to be there for every decision, but more because this particular decision was important enough that everyone involved had to be there to weigh in and make their case.

I will, as previously mentioned, remain quite happy to stay out of politics for the next sixteen years. Or even longer if I could get away with it.

But I wasn't free to just go home to Jules and Bernie's place in Knothole either. Dr. Robotnik wanted me enough to have had me kidnapped.

And I had been dumb enough to dismiss the idea that Robbie the Rabbit was a serious enough threat to report to anybody before deciding to confront him for stalking me.

So, I had a room in the palace again - my own this time and not just a spot in Sally's chambers.

I also had to sign in and out if I wanted to go anywhere. And request a bodyguard if I wanted to leave New Mobotropolis.

It was for my own protection.

And I hated it.

 

[Navrin]

Suggestion

indulgent smile. Now how did you guys find me so fast?"

Click to shrink...

Add quotation mark between smile and Now.

Hopefully Rosie figures out a way to cope with things, possibly because they implement less constraining security measures for her.

Also, glad to see that more people are calling her Rosie. I'm guessing that word is spreading that she does prefer that to Autumn.

 

[Zoruatrainer66]

Poor Rosie, just trying to figure herself out through all this stuff happening around her.

 

[BlueCladOne]

Did that fix it? I had some issues posting it and had to pick a text color, but that seems to have resolved itself, so I put it back on default.

Click to shrink...

No it is not fixed. It's a slightly different gray than the dark mode background.

Edit: I realize that sounds rude for my first comment. It came out a lot more abrupt than intended. Absolutely love the story so far, by the way. Everything so far has kept what I liked about Archie Sonic stuff (and fixed a few things I remember being annoyed with).

 

[Tangent]

SALLY not SALLY
Chapter 25
A broken SI fic by Tangent​

---

"Stupid… Big… Blocky… Feet!" I huffed out as I struggled to get said feet through the legs of my new cargo pants. I can't believe I forgot about how big my stupid feet ended up because Sally's boots were incorporated into my Robian design…

Why was I trying to put on cargo pants when I've never worn anything before in my life…

YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW! THOSE RESTRAINTS TOTALLY DID NOT COUNT!

Stupid lame-ass intrusive thoughts spoiling a good meandering thought train…

Right - where was I?

Oh yeah - my week of being so bored out of my fucking mind that I finally decided to buy some clothes just to have something different to do than the same old board games with people who either didn't have enough time, weren't really interested, or didn't understand the rules.

So, pants. Nice, loose cargo pants in basic black, with cuff-snaps at the ankles because apparently i had been delusional enough to not consider that my STUPID OVERLY LARGE FEET would have trouble with even loose pant legs.

I was going to have to have help getting these off again, wasn't I?

Well, help or a pair of scissors…

Anyway, I didn't have a job because all of the available jobs in the palace were essentially government positions. So, ugh, no. I'm not getting tricked into accepting a position in the family business early. I said not before I was at least sixteen, and I'm sticking to that! Even if Sally is trying to convince me that being an intern doesn't count.

WOO HOO! Finally! That's one foot through without wrecking the pant leg!

…

And that was only one foot through. I still have to get the other foot through the other pant leg…

FUCK!

---

"That's an… interesting look," Sally commented as I joined her for dinner. Not that I'd actually be eating anything, but she was till busy enough trying to help get our political system to be just ever so slightly less dysfunctional that we had limited windows of opportunity for socializing.

And she wonders why I want to stay out of politics.

"Get used to it," I snark as I sat down and accepted a bottle of…

Huh. Maple flavored motor oil.

Apparently somebody thought I should look after my health better even though it's been established that I can handle cooking oil just fine.

No idea who though. It wasn't Sally - she'd have told me directly and would have started before today.

Oh, right - I was in a conversation!

"This is apparently how I'm dressing forever now."

"Oh?" Sally raised a brow at me as she cut up her delicious-looking steak…

I'm not jealous, I'm not jealous, I'm not jealous…

OH, GOD, I WANT TO EAT A STEAK! OR FISH! OR EVEN A SALAD! I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF THIS LIQUID DIET OF LUBRICANTS AND LITERAL JUNK!

Okay, calm down… find my happy place… Where is my fucking happy place?

"It took me five hours to get these pants on," I said flatly. "Thanks a lot for your preference for big clunky boots, by the way. Living with them as a permanent part of my body has been so fucking great…"

"Language," Sally retorted in a bemused tone.

"Grazie mille per la tua preferenza per gli stivali grandi e ingombranti, tra l'altro. Vivere con loro come parte permanente del mio corpo è stato così dannatamente fantastico," I repeated in Spagonian and then stuck my tongue out at my sister.

"That's not what I meant and you know it," Sally admonished even as she tried to fight back a giggle.

But, yeah. My new look was now black cargo pants with a white utility belt, a black t-shirt made of that nice stretchy fabric that can go over Mobian heads and still leave a small neck hole…

They should really make pants out of this stuff, whatever it is.

Where was I?

Oh yeah! And a blue jacket and white gloves!

No, I'm pretty sure that the Power Rings I'm wearing as wrist bangles count as accessories, not clothing…

Look, me - it's right there in almost every RPG equipment screen ever: Bangles equals accessories! Deal with it!

Why am I even arguing with myself?

Better question: Why do I feel like I'm losing that argument?

Nevermind - not really important.

"Any word yet on when the Counsel might be willing to let me go back to Knothole?" I sighed, expecting a 'not yet' again. Sally had burned a lot of short-term political capital with most of the Council when she sent the army out to finish off the Death Egg last week, and four of the six members of the Council of Acorn were treating me more like a prize to deny Eggman than at an actual citizen. And it was PISSING ME OFF!

Calm… calm… peaceful thoughts… happy thoughts…

No, thought about tossing Hamlin, Dylin, Penelope, and Rosemary off of the highest tower, happy at the thought may be, are not really conducive to the situation.

Besides, they might actually lock me up for that.

Or worse, make me do their jobs.

"Not yet," Sally admitted, much to my frustration. "But Rotor, Nicole, and Uncle Chuck are working on something that might help you be able to defend yourself better. Which might get the rest of the Council off of your back."

"What? They're building me a nanotech power armor that will somehow resolve my clothing issues too?" I snarked.

"How did you know?" Sally asked, looking at me in shock.

I gaped back at her.

"HOW IS IT THAT THE FIRST NONSENSICAL IDEA TO POP OUT OF MY HEAD HAPPENS TO BE THE RIGHT GUESS!?"

…

Of course, I get the stupid-ass memory I inherited from Tangent about Rotor working on a nanotech power suit at around this time. After the fact. Stupid subconscious always racing ahead of my actual thoughts…

Spoiler: Rosie's new outfit

 

[NitroNorm5688]

Well at least she didn't put the pants on backwards?

 

[Zoruatrainer66]

How the heck did she fit her feet through those!? I was expecting cargo trunks level baggy not those!

 

[Navrin]

Rosie, you might want to consider skirts. Those could be much, much easier to put on than essentially any type of pants would be.

 

[Tangent]

Meet the seamstress who is going to be resolving Rosie's issue with pants.

She is very short (shorter than Cream).

She is a mole.

She...

Unidentified Mole Seamstress: "Let's not beat around the bush, Dahling - I design for Gods! But the Walkers have terrible fashion sense, Enerjak is too difficult to work with, and the closest thing we have to superheroes either run around willy-nilly wearing nothing but shoes and gloves or is a hologram who wears holograms. And my first actual challenge went out and bought her own clothes without considering how she would get them on and off every day."

Spoiler: I design for Gods! But I suppose that you'll have to do...

I'm trying to avoid the obvious pun (and apparently blatantly losing in a most glorious manner).

But if anyone wants to avoid having her named Edna Mole, now's your chance.

But make your suggestions quick, because she's appearing in the very next chapter!

 

[MidsizePig]

I want to name her Edna Mole. Its too good a pun to pass up. Dew it!

 

[Navrin]

Can a Robian freely modify the parts of themselves that came from their clothing without eating into the 20% "can still be transformed back" allowance? For instance, could Rosie's boots be disassembled while leaving her feet intact? Or does the process not work like that?

Edna Mole seems like a fine name to me. I haven't thought of a more fun pun yet.

 

[Tangent]

Can a Robian freely modify the parts of themselves that came from their clothing without eating into the 20% "can still be transformed back" allowance? For instance, could Rosie's boots be disassembled while leaving her feet intact? Or does the process not work like that?

Edna Mole seems like a fine name to me. I haven't thought of a more fun pun yet.

Click to shrink...

Oh, Rosie could totally take her feet off and put them back on without causing any issues with that. It's just the fact that she doesn't know how to shut off her own pain receptors that stops her from doing exactly that.

 

[Navrin]

Oh, Rosie could totally take her feet off and put them back on without causing any issues with that. It's just the fact that she doesn't know how to shut off her own pain receptors that stops her from doing exactly that.

Click to shrink...

Not quite what I meant. I had meant more does she have feet underneath the boots, or did the roboticizer fudge things together instead of keeping those separate (even if connected)? So, could she go to a mechanic to get the boots removed, leaving her robian feet intact? And if she did, would the removed mass count against the 20% allowance, or are clothing-derived parts free game in that regard?

 

[Tangent]

Not quite what I meant. I had meant more does she have feet underneath the boots, or did the roboticizer fudge things together instead of keeping those separate (even if connected)? So, could she go to a mechanic to get the boots removed, leaving her robian feet intact? And if she did, would the removed mass count against the 20% allowance, or are clothing-derived parts free game in that regard?

Click to shrink...

Now that's where it get's interesting due to the observable implied lore!

Worn items that get merged into the Mobian when they are roboticized become part of the Robian as far as structure goes but does not otherwise count against the 20% threshold. The thing is, there is no clear division to tell someone where the worn item ends and the original Mobian begins until they are deroboticized. Which, if done correctly, is just a straight reversal of the process.

So, yeah, the boots and cuirass can hypothetically be removed, but how much of the underlying converted tissue are you taking with them?