The Sekirei Parable Demonstration (Sekirei/The Stanley Parable)

A/N: I just had this silly little idea for a story pop into my head after enjoying The Stanley Parable for the 8th time and decided 'what the heck?'. I decided to use the demo of the game as a basis for the story, as I am just testing the waters for this idea and the demo is more or less a self-contained short. This fic will be comprised of just one chapter but split into parts that, if all goes well, I should update consistently. Depending on the response I get, I may or may not do a crossover with the full game, including Ultra Deluxe content.

Let the absurdity begin...

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The Sekirei Parable Demonstration​

[BGM: Exploring Stanley]

Minato’s flock of Sekirei were puzzled. One moment they were with their Ashikabi in Matsu’s room, the next they found themselves staring at a white brick wall that was inches from where the tips of their noses were. Miya was also there with them, dumbfounded like they all were if not more so. Strangely, however, Minato was absent. It was like a kidnapping in reverse.

On the wall was the message, ‘The Stanley Parable Demonstration'

“Uh, Matsu, where are we?” Musubi inquired, her cowlick morphing into a question mark as she cast a glance over to the windows outfitting the walls of the absurdly high ceiling above them. They couldn’t even see anything out of them it was so damn bright. It was as if she were simply looking out into a pure white void that was only meant to make it look like the outdoors was particularly sunny.

“Yeah, Matsu-nee-chan. Where’s big brother?” Kuu peeped, tugging at the redhead's dress.

“I don’t know,” she said as her eyes wandered around the room along with the rest of the Sekirei’s. Next to her was a large rectangular wooden sign that had an orange arrow painted on it. Wherever they were, obviously their abductor wanted them to have some sort of direction. “Seems like a parking garage of sorts.”

After turning around, the group wandered further inside until they gathered at the center.

Sure enough, three vehicles were parked next to a small set of steps leading to a door, confirming Matsu’s suspicion. And speaking of doors…

“Pray tell, I just noticed this garage has no garage doors, let alone any way of reaching the outside.” Tsukiumi pointed out, thumbing her chin as she pondered, eyes focused on the roofed ceiling. “How did these cars get in here?”

“Good question,” Miya responded. Her mask began to creep over her shoulder, hissing its purple flames. “Matsu, please explain what just happened. Why have we been teleported from the inn?”

“I have no idea! I swear! I just got this odd game off steam and wanted to record our reactions to it as a keepsake and poof!”

“Are you saying the game somehow trapped us inside it?” Homura asked, dumbfounded at the absurd claim. First a battle royal, and now sentient video games with agendas. Wonderful. “You do realize how stupid that sounds, right?”

“It’s all I can come up with! I’m just as stumped as the rest of you!”

“Well, wherever we are, we won’t find out if we just stay put.” Kazehana chimed in.

“Agreed,” the landlady said, bowing her head and taking a stride over to the only door in the room. At the very bottom of the steps next to the wall was another wooden sign with a message in yellow paint that said,

STANLEY PARABLE
DEMONSTATION​

And yes, ‘demonstration’ was misspelled.

Not that it mattered much since none of them could read English besides Matsu.

Below it was another arrow with the message THIS WAY.

“Whoever or whatever is holding us hostage must not think too highly of our IQs…” Matsu mumbled. The arrow literally pointed the way toward the only exit, right next to the damn exit.

Musubi pointed at the sign and began waving her arm to grab everyone’s attention. “Hey everyone, look! I think this arrow is trying to tell us something!”

“Nothing gets past you, Musubi.” Homura sweat dropped with his sarcasm.

Miya led the group through the open door. After a short trek up another flight of steps they found themselves at a receptionist's desk. Strangely, no one was in the seat. Just beneath the ceiling windows behind the desk was a number that had just ticked up from 27 to 28.

A voice came over an intercom, “Welcome to The Stanley Parable Demonstration! Your number is 28. When your number is displayed, please enter the demonstration room. Thank you, and have a pleasant demonstration.”

A door to their left then opened automatically.

“Uhh, okayyyyyy?...” Matsu labored.

“What is the meaning of this?! Where have you taken us? Where is my husband?!” Tsukiumi hollered as she got hot under the collar, or her choker as it were.

“I don’t think she can hear you, Tsukiumi.” Homura pointed out.

“Best pay along and do as it says for now.” Miya considered aloud. “We may get answers quicker that way.”

“Lead the way, Miya-sama!” Musubi cheered.

The group went through the newly opened door and entered a short hallway outfitted with white and grey bricks. At the end of it was another door that also automatically opened for them as they approached. A sign standing next to the door read WAITING ROOM with a hand pointing literally right next to the door.

“My, I never would have thought the waiting room was through there if not for the sign pointing it out to us.” Matsu grumbled in annoyance.

Wandering inside, they were stunned to see that no one was there waiting their turn. There was plenty of furniture and magazines to read as well as some nice paintings hung for them to look at, but nothing worthy of note other than a number above the double doors directly across from them that was slowly ticking up from the number 22.

“Should we wait our turn?” Kuu asked curiously, tilting her noggin to her shoulder.

“Yeah, we only have to wait a bit longer for 28.” the landlady surmised. She looked over at one of the clocks to check the time. Its second hand was going in reverse and ascending counterclockwise. “Odd.”

“This is some Star Trek conspiracy nonsense right here,” Matsu noted as she took note of the clock too.

They took rest on one of the several blue sofas the waiting room offered as they lingered for their number to show. Homura snagged a magazine from the coffee table. On the cover was the label ‘TIME’ and clocks were littered all over it. Opening it he found much of the same. There weren’t even any articles or texts of any sort for that matter. Just pictures of clocks, watches, and sundials. He tossed it aside, knowing a long day was ahead of him.

Soon enough their number appeared and they went on their way through the doors into a green hallway that broke off to the right. Ahead of them was a collage of four images of ‘famous demos’ if the label below them pointing it out wasn’t enough of a giveaway. They paid it little mind and proceeded in.

XXXXXX

A/N: I'm writing the next part as we speak. Hopefully I'll have it up by the end of the week if not sooner. Hope you enjoy. I cannot wait to start writing The Narrator's parts.

 

Ascending some steps they halted at some brown furnishings when they heard an omnipresent voice humming. Across the room from the loveseat and living chair was a wall encased in monitors. Twelve in total, three rows, and four columns. All of them had rectangular lines of each color in the rainbow. It was like a live feed was cut. Upon taking a few steps forward, the screens went dark and the two in the very center showed the word ‘WELCOME!’ and someone began to speak.

“Oh hello hello hello, welcome to the Stanley Parable live demon-er, wait what’s this?”

[BGM: Leaving Stanley]

The Sekirei were taken aback by the disembodied voice addressing them. They glanced around the room to see who was speaking, but no one was there besides them. Where was it coming from?

“Anime characters? In my demo? This game isn't known for any weeaboo nonsense...or is it? Hold on, let me consult my notes...” The voice, thick with incredulity, faded into the backdrop of his alleged documentation. A cacophony of paper shuffling and rustling ensued, as if he was excavating ancient scrolls. The bafflement in his tone mirrored that of his perplexed guests. “Did someone mod my game? How the hell did you all get in here? This place is supposed to be completely empty besides Stanley. And speaking of him, where is he?” he gasped. “Did you kill him?”

“No! We didn’t do anything like that!” Matsu replied. “We just kinda…appeared here out of nowhere. Who are you?”

“AND YOU CAN SPEAK?!" The Narrator shrieked. "Now I know this isn’t part of the demo! I’m the only one who was given a voice for it! Not even Stanley himself has a single line of dialogue and he’s the main character! What the hell is going on? Who are you and what do you want with my story?”

“None of us have any idea what you’re talking about or who this ‘Stanley’ is.” the landlady said sternly with a hint of annoyance. “As Matsu said we all just got transported here somehow. Can you let us go home?”

The Narrator hummed. “I wish I could help you, but this is all new to me. I’m simply a narrator for the experience. I don’t even like anime, especially the kinds that throw around gratuitous fanservice as if giving characters big busts and limited attire makes up for a lack of plot and cohesive narrative!” he grumbled frustratedly following his rant, then sighed. “But it seems we’re trapped here with each other for the time being. We may as well make the most of it…”

“Cease thy cowardly concealment!” Tsukiumi thundered. “Transport us forthwith to our spouse! We haven't a tick to squander on electronic escapades!”

“Yeah!” Kuu backed her.

“Shakespearean English?” the strange voice questioned. “Your presence is a chronological conundrum. You share the visual aesthetic of your companions, but your dialect is a relic of a bygone era...”

“No, she's one of us,” Homura interjected, his eyes rolling like marbles.

“Is that so? Well, that’s odd…”

“Odd?! Hold thy insults, cur!” Tsukiumi grumbled, growing more agitated.

“Seriously why do you speak that way? I may have a funny accent, but at least I have the excuse of being British! You’re Japanese! In fact, all of you are! Why was the dub chosen over the far superior sub?!”

“None of us have a clue why she does it, it’s just her thing.” Kazehana tittered. “And for the record, all of us are aliens.”

"Aliens, indeed…” the Narrator mused with a hint of skepticism.

“Bite thy tongue before I rip it from thy maw…” A tic mark throbbed on Tsukiumi’s head. Honestly, she didn’t have a clue why she did it either, but she’d be damned if she let him get one over on her at her expense. “My breasts may be large, but my modesty is something I take pride in! Or dost thou not have the temerity to direct thy arrogant words to my face in person?!”

“Modesty? You think you’re modest? Hahahahaha, don’t make me laugh!”

“How dare thee! I am the most prim and proper of all the Sekirei and you best not forget it!”

“Well, you should have considered that before deciding to parade around in a fetishy gothic maid outfit. Seriously, one gust of wind will result in a famous Marylin Monroe mishap. You know the one I’m talking about...”

“RRRRRAAAAAGGGGHHHH!!” Tsukiumi roared as everyone snickered at her expense, remembering each time the Narrator's assumption resulted in that very mishap. Oh, the many many dozens. “Thy will pay dearly for such remarks! My outfit is classy! Thou simply has no taste!”

“Mhm,” the narrator hummed. “Keep telling yourself that, blondie. I’m simply unfurling a simple observation of it like doves from a magician’s cuff.”

“You said this is a game demo, right?” Matsu cut in as Tsukiumi’s teeth began to grind over themselves. “Well maybe if we all play it to the end we might be able to find answers and maybe free ourselves.”

“Hmm, the redhead with the glasses and bigger boobs makes an astute point. Perhaps you can all roleplay as Stanley…yes, yes! I can make a story out of this nonsense!”

“What would role-playing as Stanley require us to do?” Matsu inquired. “We don’t even know who Stanley is so how can we emulate his behavior?”

“Oh, it’s easy! Just do everything I tell you to do without question!”

“Come again?” Tsukiumi sweat dropped.

“Ah yes, I see it! All that nervous tension and looming uncertainty! Why don’t we drink in the anticipation for a moment! Just for twenty minutes or so.”

“Twenty minutes? That’s quite a stretch.” Kazehana commented.

The voice ignored her. “Please for just twenty minutes, don’t move or act in any way. Simply remain motionless and let the thrill of demoing the Stanley Parable wash over you!”

The monitors began flashing the message ‘PLEASE REMAIN MOTIONLESS’.

The group shared confused glances amongst themselves for a brief moment.

“Should we do as he says?” Homura asked no one in particular. He was in no mood for this at all, but what choice did he have?

“I refuse to stall while my husband’s life is at stake!” Tsukiumi argued, stomping her heeled boot.

“Oh I get it, you’re all too anxious and can barely hold still! Tell you what, I think we should walk off that nervous energy before getting the demo underway…” A red arrow pointing to the left blinked on the monitors and not long after a hidden passage opened up for them to follow. “Here, why don’t I take you all on a little tour of the facility and show you how we make a demonstration for a game like The Stanley Parable.”

The flock gathered at the opening and peered inside at the catwalk looming over the exposed area before looking at one another to gauge their reactions. They were all unnerved, but since they were all superpowered aliens, they decided to play along. If an ambush was waiting for them, they’d still have an advantage even if Miya wasn’t there with them.

Their slight footfalls clomped on the metal catwalk as they tread inside. On the wall in the distance was the message,

THE STANLEY PARABLE
DEMO CONSTRUCTION FACILITY​

The floor on the lower level was also empty aside from a couple of open doors and stacks of cardboard boxes littered about.

The voice chimed in again, “This is where I and the other proctors have been working meticulously to construct a demo that explains clearly and concisely exactly what the Stanley Parable is. How it plays and why the player should spend real-world money on the main game.”

“Yeah, well I’m still not buying it.” Homura quipped as he followed the path along with the rest much to the narrator’s chagrin.

He grumbled as he continued the explanation as they entered a room that served no purpose other than to connect to another catwalk that led them deeper into the complex. “Video game demonstrations are tricky and without the proper technology, you run the risk of the player having no idea what to expect in the full version.”

Not long after, the catwalk led them to a stairwell housed in a room that had dozens of big red buttons lining the walls, the majority of which were out of reach.

The advisor spoke again as they descended them, “Ah, here is one such technology. These buttons are meant to convey the meaning of choice and the decisions you make. After all, choices carry tremendous meaning and consequence, didn’t you know that? Go ahead, why don’t one of you try picking one of these buttons to press and we’ll see what your choice says about you!”

The group paused, looking around at the multitude of big red buttons surrounding them.

Miya approached the door and jiggled its handle. “It’s locked.”

“I guess we need to push a button for him to let us out,” Matsu concluded. “So, who wants to do the honors?”

XXXXXX

A/N: So, you heard Matsu. Who should press the button? Leave your choice in a comment. The most popular one will be who does.

 

A/N: "You know, sometimes when you solicit another person's opinion it makes you realize that you knew which one you actually really wanted all along."

XXXXXX

“I’ll activate the ginormous button!” Musubi announced with the enthusiasm of a game show host. As she theatrically extended her hand towards it, the world inexplicably plunged into darkness. Unfazed, she jabbed at the button with the determination of a piano player in a silent film. “What’s the big idea here?”

“Regrettably, Musubi,” Matsu sighed, her tone dripping with melodrama, “it appears Kusano has already stolen the limelight.” She pointed accusingly at the green-hued girl, who was wearing a grin wide enough to rival the Cheshire Cat.

“Woohoo! I’m the hero!” Kuu proclaimed, striking a Superman pose with the gusto of a toddler in a cape.

The narrator, now sounding like a flustered auctioneer, interjected, “Uuuuuuhhhhh… heavens to Betsy…”

[BGM: Informing Stanley]

“What’s the hiccup, Almighty Narrator?” Matsu inquired, her eyebrow arching like a curious cat.

“Awkward turtle…” the narrator mumbled, pacing back and forth like a confused penguin.

“Would you care to enlighten us?” Miya asked, her voice as smooth as silk but as sharp as a tack.

“It’s not that you’ve goofed up, it’s…how do I explain this without turning red?”

“Spill the beans and cut to the chase,” Homura grumbled, sounding as cheerful as a bear woken from hibernation.

“Well, you see, to unlock that door, one of these buttons had to be pressed and I needed to utter something rather… let’s say, risqué. Regardless of the button, the same cheeky comment was required. Had it been any adult, I’d be as merry as a lark, but a child doing it? That’s a pickle and a half…”

Kazehana, as patient as a cat watching a mouse hole, sighed. “So, what’s the magic phrase, Shakespeare?”

“I have to utter something that will make me question my own existence and possibly send me to confession. Let me gather my wits. Hold your horses!”

Kusano, looking as guilty as a dog caught eating a steak, mumbled an apology.

Miya, ever the mother hen, patted her head. “No harm done, little sprout.”

The narrator, after a few minutes that felt like an eternity, strutted back like a peacock. “Eureka! I’ve got it,” he announced, clapping his hands as if he’d solved world hunger.

“Spit it out then,” Matsu urged, her voice laced with the impatience of someone waiting for a kettle to boil.

“Before I reveal the secret incantation, someone must cover the youngling’s ears. Trust me, it’s for her sanity and mine.”

“Is it that scandalous?”

“Yes, and no backtalk,” he commanded, his tone as stern as a schoolmaster.

“Well, you heard the gentleman,” Matsu groaned, moving towards Kusano with the grace of a ballerina. “Come here, sprout.”

“But I’m nosy!” Kuu protested.

“Trust me, you’re better off in the dark,” the narrator grimaced.

Miya, with a twinkle in her eye, coaxed, “Let her cover your ears and I’ll let you adopt a unicorn for the inn once we escape.”

“Can it be a rainbow unicorn?”

“Absolutely,” Miya beamed.

“Deal!” Kuu squealed with delight.

Matsu covered Kusano’s ears, her hands resembling fluffy earmuffs. “She’s all set.”

“Are we sure she’s oblivious?”

“What?” Kuu responded cluelessly.

“Perfect,” Matsu confirmed with a nod.

“Excellent.” The narrator cleared his throat and proceeded to read the line. “How fascinating. Did you know that 94% of all people who select that particular button are…” he paused.

“Are what?” Tsukiumi blinked. “Out with it. We haven’t all day.”

The narrator sighed and tried again to finish his statement. “This is difficult for me, but I’ll say it. Did you know that 94% of all people who select that particular button are sexual predators?”

The group did a collective spit take.

*CLANG!

“Ow!” the narrator cried. “Where the hell did this ladle come from?! It just appeared out of nowhere and hit me in the back of the head!”

“It’s nothing less than what you deserve. Pervert.” Miya smirked.

The narrator grumbled and the door swung open. “Just get going, everyone.”

 

Moments later the flock flowed into the facility's central hub. It was so empty that one could hear a pin drop and echo. Surrounding them were several doors leading to other rooms. Above the doors were signs which labeled their supposed purpose. For some reason the said signs were akin to digital clocks with neon green text. Why they weren’t simply handwritten was beyond them.

“What a waste of electricity,” Matsu muttered aloud. “Seriously, who mods a demo?”

“Why question anything at this point?” Homura grumbled under his mask.

Their omniscient observer then graced them once more with his British yammering. “Okay, what else can I show you, then? This place is the buffalo of game design! Nothing is wasted.”

“Yeah, except for our time.” Homura said mockingly. “Can you just tell us where we have to go? I can’t read English and no one else here can either.”

“I can, but I agree.” Matsu responded. “Narrator, would you possibly be able to change the language of these signs to Kanji? It’d make our time here less difficult.”

“Sorry, no can do. Those signs don’t have language options. Besides, then I would be confused. Japanese words simply aren’t tangible for me.”

“For the record, Kanji aren’t words. They’re characters.”

[BGM: Elevator]

“Characters you say? Well if that’s the case they’re the most uninteresting and shallow characters I’ve ever seen put to writing. They all look different, sure, but none have even a single defining trait to them. No, wait, scratch that. They all have one in common: They're all unreadable.”

“No, you’re just an idiot that won’t read a book.” Homura scoffed.

“I haven’t the time to learn a new language, and I doubt you all are patient enough for me to go about learning it to help you. Tell you what? How about instead I watch the anime you’re from to familiarize myself with you as well as the world you’re from? It shouldn’t take too long. Just sit tight and I’ll be right back…” there was a pause. “Hold on, I have no idea what anime you’re even from. What is it called, do you know?”

“But we’re real-life people.” Miya declared, raising a brow. “I don’t know where you keep getting this anime nonsense from. The fact you’re talking to us right now in the flesh should be proof of that.”

“You seem to be in denial over your predicament. Let’s see, hmm, how can I remedy this blunder? Hmm, perhaps learning your names will help? You, with the glasses, tell me yours first.”

“I’m Matsu.” she said, raising her hand. Everyone else followed her lead.

“I’m Kuu.”

“Homura.”

“Miya.”

“Musubi.

“Kazehana.”

And last but not least…

“Spit it out, blondie. What’s your name?”

“Tsukiumi.”

“...I beg your pardon?”

“Are thou deaf? Tsukiumi!”

The narrator grew infuriated, but why? “Have you no shame, woman! A child is present!”

“What the devil art thou on about!” She repeated herself louder. “Tsukiumi!”

“Absolutely not!”

She decided to say it really slowly this time. “SKYOO-ME!”

“FOR THE LAST TIME! I WILL NOT SCREW YOU!”

Tsukiumi’s face began to boil red like a lobster’s armor. “WHAAAAAAT?! THAT’S WHAT THOU THOUGHT I SAID?!”

“Well, if you’re not going to tell me your name, I will need to find another means of tracking down this blasted anime. Let me give this a moment of thought… Ah, yes! The one in the purple singlet mentioned something about all of you being aliens! Perhaps giving me the name of your species will aid in matters?”

“We’re called ‘Sekirei’.” Musubi shared.

“Thank you. Allow me just a minute while I search the term on eBay and see what pops up. Sit tight and I’ll be right back…”

“Hold on! If you go now, we’ll all just be sitting ducks with no direction! We don’t want to be trapped here for hours!” Matsu shouted.

“It matters not. I’m from a plane of existence where time passes differently. Once I leave my recording booth to do my own thing it may take me a few days in my time, but for you, only a few seconds will go by. Now, if you excuse me, I must go about purchasing this Blu-ray set…”

“Something tells me this isn’t going to end well for him…” Kazehana sighed. She didn’t know the half of it.

Sure enough, the narrator returned not a second later, throwing a wobbly. “THREE-HUNDRED DOLLARS?! What is this nonsense?! Is it out of print or something?! Why would Funimation deny perverts the chance to give them their hard-earned money while still shilling overrated garbage like Highschool DxD?! Enabling scalpers like this is highway robbery and I will not placate them! I won’t do it! I won’t do it! I won’t do it!” the narrator seethed as his skin crawled. “I have no choice now. I have to pirate it.”

“The narrator is going to break the law?” Kuu chirped with a head tilt.

“As if I have a choice in the matter? Honestly, I doubt your softcore porn series is worth even paying even a tenth of that for anyway if my experience watching Highschool DxD is anything to go by. I slogged through all 4 seasons of it and I still have no idea what the plot was. Oh wait, I know. Sex.” He declared, then grumbled. “No, scratch that, I retract that statement. It's not even sex. It's no sex. No sex for anyone ever. It has to be the horniest anime about not getting any I've ever seen. And I doubt your story will be any different. WCOfun, here I come. God help me…”

A moment passes and the narrator returns. “Well, I must say, that was rather unexpected.”

“What’s up?” Matsu asked, confused as ever much like everyone else.

“Your series, this Sekirei…it’s good. Dare I say, it’s fantastic! Completely blew my expectations out of the water! Part of me wants to call it a guilty pleasure, but that would be a lie. I genuinely loved it. It had some flaws, sure, but for the most part, it was consistent. A death battle tournament featuring superpowered aliens that grow stronger from the power of love? It’s quite a marvel. Why did this only get two seasons? Who in their right mind would cancel this and let Highschool DxD become the front-runner for all harem anime? This isn’t fair. You all deserve better. In fact, I will give you better! I will make this demo from here on out your much-deserved third season! Forget Stanley, this is your story now.”

“I don’t know about you guys,” Homura swallowed. “but I’m terrified.”