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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. moralrelativity

    moralrelativity Recovering pendant.

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    delete "they're"
    a -> I
     
  2. DrThoth

    DrThoth I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    De-aging Henry should be something Paragon is able and motivated to do (honestly I think healing the comatose woman, if framed as 'facilitating me getting Henry available sooner', is also feasible).
     
  3. Vaermina

    Vaermina Versed in the lewd.

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    And this is where you offer to make him twenty years younger.
     
  4. Darko

    Darko Well worn.

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    maybe just 'Phillip'

    maybe 'with hearsay they can use it to'

    maybe remove 'they're'

    maybe remove one 'in'

    'I healed'

    maybe add a comma 'everyone, I got'

    maybe 'about it'

    He may have the motivation for it, but he may be hesitant due to Henry being a metahuman.

    Paul has been hesitant in healing metahumans with his ring due to fearing he may somehow damage them, like when he didn't heal Captain Comet after rescuing him.

    Though healing the woman may work.
     
  5. Sockmonkey

    Sockmonkey Not too sore, are you?

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    Well, there's always Alan Scott.
     
  6. Queshire

    Queshire Not too sore, are you?

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    "Pay" must be an interesting thing in a case like this. Gold? Well it was easy enough for OL to do some asteroid mining back on day 1. Now he could probably do it without blinking. Land? Well find a world with a medieval tech level, pick out a nice tropical island no one is using, and you're fine. Tech? Well there's some potential there, though I'm not sure what he'd want.
     
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  7. DrThoth

    DrThoth I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    I don't recall that, though Captain Comet's state of injury was hardly normal. Paragon's healed Kid Flash before with no apparent issue. I suppose de-aging a telepath's brain can be more complicated; I'm not sure if there would be ramifications if he de-aged the rest of Henry a bit while leaving the brain untouched.
     
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  8. Vaermina

    Vaermina Versed in the lewd.

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    Maybe, but I doubt the solar systems mineral rights are open any more.
     
  9. Alasnuyo

    Alasnuyo I am always here

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    May I ask for the source of this image? This looks interesting.
     
  10. zeebza

    zeebza Getting out there.

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    Overly Sarcastic Productions a YouTube channel specifically their series on Journey to the West.
     
  11. Darko

    Darko Well worn.

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    Kori basically asked him why he didn't heal him and he replied that due to being a metahuman his physiology may be different.

    remove the 'I'

    Maybe change it to 'Damyn', in the rest of the text that's how it's spelled, or maybe the 'Damyn' part is wrong.

    maybe 'off of him'

    maybe 'you'd know'
     
  12. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    Henry King Jr, aka Brain Wave II, for those wondering. The Paragon's go-to telepathic trainer. Lining up the training position for any White Martians he recruits, evidently.

    Being called in on some manner of case, then? I suppose 'consulting telepath' is a growing market. And a fun thing to have on a business card.

    A regular encounter, eh? I'm guessing he does a lot of consulting for the local police force of his home town.

    And a veiled accusation of a conflict of interest? That's always a wrinkle.

    Joy of being in a very exclusive group. IE The next evolution of humanity. Not that there hasn't been quite a few of them over the years in DC. :confused: I remember one Superman story from the early eighties with genetically engineered psychics whose makers had the psychics' little fingers turned into a second thumb, for some reason...

    Different field. It's like asking a podiatrist to look at a brain surgery case. Sure, both work with the body, but in different ways.

    And I suspect it'd be a lot harder to read angry memories than avaricious ones, too.

    So... Someone in a coma, involved in something violent. Easy enough to pick up the details of the case as we go...

    Still doesn't mean Henry'll accept your offer, OL. But we all know how persuasive you can be...

    If it's a private room, it might already be crowded. Have you seen how small some of them are?

    Heh, like I said. No police officer to observe? Or is this not a criminal matter.. yet?

    Ah, the good old walk-and-talk scene. remember how often this used to happen?

    ...Ah. Sounds like her neighbour's the prime suspect, then. I wonder which one was the noisemaker?

    So... The police are trying not to make more work for themselves?

    The lady's family suing the neighbour? And no doubt depending on the outcome of this, there may be criminal charges to apply too? I bet OL's ring could pick up all manner of forensic traces...

    That depends. How much can you make him want to do it?

    Because the medical industry is a bad-tempered 800-pound gorilla with a fear of new things? :)eek: No RL comments, please!) Especially in the DC Universe, with gods, magic and advanced technology all capable of advanced or even perfect healing...

    Might be easier to allow him to do a quick telepathic read of the events in OL's head. I'm sure he can summarize effectively, anyway

    Though it's worth noting, as has been argued here often, that the colour is reinforced mentally as much as physically... And that's a depressingly good read of the situation, I suspect...

    Just a bit, yes. How has M'gann's training been going, anyway? Has she learned everything he can teach her yet?

    That's probably a good thing, really. No risk of accidental mental illusion reinforcements, either... Just a matter of drilling in good telepathic ethics...

    I hope they have a way to speed it up. I don't think Henry has enough time to manage all of them individually...

    Ah, good point. Teach a few, they can teach more, and those can teach more still. The hard part is making sure the lessons don't get distorted in the mental game of Chinese Whispers.

    Who might well set a new record for individual staff payments.

    That's... Quite the trip for a kind-of temporary job. :p On the other hand, he'd get to meet all manner of space babes, green and otherwise ...

    As has been mentioned, he could quite easily be in his thirties again. I'm sure OL could offer that as a bonus, he has plenty of data on Henry's biology.

    I suppose you could count it as a mid-life crisis of sorts? A Seachange? Especially if you do get rejuvenated...

    ...Or maybe set Earth up as a training world for NEMO? Admittedly, it's a bit too far for casual trips, but you never know.

    I see OL's wasting no time setting this thing up. Barely spread the word on Mars, and now lining up the trainer. Certainly, Mister King's his best non-villainous option. There's quite the dearth of heroic telepaths in DC, for some reason. Quite the contrast to Marvel, eh?
     
  13. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
    Dakyn is the name of the admiral they claimed to be fighting for.
    Those work as they are.
     
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  14. Darko

    Darko Well worn.

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    I think there was this one version of Superman that was supposed to be the next stage in human evolution, but it wasn't Red Son.

    Well he'll probably meet the green ones after they free Colu.

    For now he'll have to settle for tall, leggy, buxom gold/orange skinned women.

    Lucky bastard.

    At least the civilians in DC aren't regular winners of the Darwin Award.

    Seriously Marvel civilians are practically the Daniel Day Lewis of Darwin Award winners.
     
    Last edited: Dec 27, 2020
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  15. Radiant Knight

    Radiant Knight Phoenix Fire

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    Should probably be 'an unusually precise empath'
     
  16. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected
    Natural speech.
     
  17. Vice Xarno

    Vice Xarno I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Also how did you get the image onto tyour comment, i looked at its link but it says screenshot, and i have only managed to figure out how to insert edit image by adding a link, not an actual file,

    every image i had to find to post a photo needed a URL, i have not been able to figure out putting screen shots, and it looks like you didn't us a URL for this so how did you do it?
     
  18. Idkusername

    Idkusername Versed in the lewd.

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    I uploaded my screenshot to a free image hosting site and used the url for the uploaded image.
     
  19. Vice Xarno

    Vice Xarno I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    link to the site pls
     
  20. Idkusername

    Idkusername Versed in the lewd.

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    imgbb.com
     
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  21. Gantradies

    Gantradies Not too sore, are you?

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    hat universe's Dianna is Dead-for all intents and purposes "Tangsied"'s screwing her still-breathing corpse >.<
    Corpsefucker incapacitated her,hollowed her mind out of everything other then memories,or and shoved a replacement personality,or at bare minimum systematically rewrote her entire personality/conscious mind in so he could keep screwing his newest sextoy without getting eviscerated/pounded flat by essentially everyone-
    and im assuming he's been doing something similar to everyone who's caught on/he's decided he wanted to fuck and isnt interested in him....
     
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  22. webxro

    webxro Benevolent Bystander

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    Ok so small thing I noticed, at least until page 70 all d.pr links are broken.
     
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  23. Zig

    Zig Know what you're doing yet?

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    There were multiple versions with that explanation including Red Son who wasn't just an evolved human,
    an evolved Luthor
     
  24. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Oh goodness. I knew that had happened, but 70 pages?
     
  25. Stsword

    Stsword I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    As already covered, yes Red Son Superman is in fact a human. But he's not the only human Superman, actually.

    Perhaps you were thinking of the Superman Monster, where Lex Luthor discovered the kryptonian birthing matrix and used it to reanimate a body made from surgerically reattached human body parts with the powers of Superman?

    Or perhaps you are thinking of Clark Kent from Secret Identity, where a boy from Kansas named Clark Kent had the powers of Superman?

    Tim Kelly's son had a soul before getting his father's eye.

    It took decades for Alan to become a will elemental from a leaking ring and that process never finished, but it took the soulless Sybarite decades less time to grow a demonic soul ex nihilo from eating demons.

    Further, it wouldn't make sense for Tangseid to be a New God because he got himself a set of magic warding tattoos after the Crisis of Infinite Pauls.

    Tattoos he would not be allowed to keep as a New God because one of the multiple powers Zoat added to New Gods in this story is a healing factor that doesn't allow the body to be changed, even improvements.

    Magical warding tattoos that would be redundant because one of the other powers Zoat added to New Gods in this story is magic resistance.
     
  26. Darko

    Darko Well worn.

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    I was actually thinking of Harvey Dent.

    I think Tangseid mentioned something about an enhanced meta physique, but that could have been something Circe did instead of him becoming a New God, like maybe a stronger soul.
     
    Last edited: Dec 27, 2020
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  27. webxro

    webxro Benevolent Bystander

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    At least 70, IDK more, I didn't check more.
     
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  28. Coda

    Coda I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Does it bother you that a TV show leaves off mid-storyline before going on season hiatus over the summer? Does it bother you that movies will set up an arc to be resolved in another movie that won't release for another year or two? Have you ever seen Rashomon? (I don't expect the answer to the last one to be yes, but it's an interesting film.)

    meantime

    shows

    bulletproof
     
  29. Vaermina

    Vaermina Versed in the lewd.

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    Yup.

    Let's hope the Book of Destiny kicks off soon and reverses the brainwashing and sends him to the afterlife.
     
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  30. AngelicKnight.

    AngelicKnight. Lewd demon of negotiable affection

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    I wonder if there is a Paul on earth 11? And if that is also genderbent?
     
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