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[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

Reader mode
AndrewJTalon said:
I did have a fun idea. Ruby finds a magical artifact... That makes everyone but Jaune think they are their fairy tale or mythical inspirations. Jaune misses it because he tripped over a sock he didn't put away.

So... Yeah, he's the only one who can figure out how to fix this as Beacon turns into absolute bedlam.

He is soooo screwed.

Glynda is the Good Witch.

And tries to help Jaune solve the issue... But can't actually do anything.

Jaune: "So... All you can do is tell me what to do but can't do anything to help me?"

Glynda: brightly "That is correct!"

Glynda: "Do you have ruby slippers?"

Jaune: "... I have Ruby's slippers?"

Glynda: "Close enough!"
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Is Blake hiding in a giant boot, or running around Beacon only wearing boots?
 
Wait so Roman Is loosely based on Joker? Or maybe Riddler?

And Neo was basically inspired by the female cosplay of Roman.

So would they become Joker and Harley Quin or Double Riddler?

Either way Vale is fucked.

Does Salem become a gestalt entity of every person who was tried during the Salem witch trials or does she become the Wicked Witch of West?

Oh wait, Mercury becomes the Trickster God who has helped Humanity throughout the ages.

Huh, Vale might not be fucked.


......Shit Sun becomes wukong which is a 50 50 with armageddon or helpful, Neptune..... Yo somebody Hide Weiss, Neptune's not used to taking no for an answer if we go by Greco-Roman syncretism.

And Frejya is there too. As is the Grimm reaper.

Dammit it's too complicated to calculate all these various entities in one story.

And that's not even beginning to unravel Ozpin, He is Merlin, Odin, Wizard of Oz, Possibly Arthur too with how many relics he had the Last King and those relics are definitely Fae relics.
 
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zMADLAXz said:
Wait so Roman Is loosely based on Joker? Or maybe Riddler?

And Neo was basically inspired by the female cosplay of Roman.

So would they become Joker and Harley Quin or Double Riddler?

Either way Vale is fucked.
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Roman is the gentleman thief. Think Lupin.
Balorak146 said:
I maintain the belief that something about that woman is suspicious AF.
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Only because in the movie they combine two characters so it looks like Glinda could have sent Dorothy home at once. In the books there's a different witch who tells Dorothy to go find the Wizard with Glinda basically helping immediately.
 
digcat said:
Especially love the last two. More Weiss is always a good thing. As well the more it's pointed out that Hazel is a bitch the better. Also where did you find the Weiss one.
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the multi weiss edit is from reddit r/FNKI
Cinder in beacon checking out Jaune
if-a-woman-referred-to-me-as-a-temptation-id-be-smiling-v0-ekcuti6134lh1.jpeg
manga timeline made it canon she either had a crush or wanted to cuck Pyrrha
ghosts-of-cinders-past-murders-v0-q9mz7095vdlh1.jpeg
what Emerald could do to her and i'd love it
dorks in training to professional dorks
jaune-and-ruby-by-on-twitter-v0-d73opsq78elh1.jpeg
them literally five minutes later
my-cool-and-easy-to-understand-classmate-chan-by-v0-1iy11lctxalh1.jpeg
this dynamic his happening with Ace Ops and the Happy Huntress
favorite-duo-thats-an-example-of-this-trope-v0-irimml1qhalh1.jpeg
would make both more likeable, instead of the insufferable twats we got
 
zMADLAXz said:
What is Clockwork Orange. I'll have to see cause this series always pops up whenever I ask about Roman.
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This is a Google summary
Clockwork Orange is a 1971 dystopian crime film written, produced, and directed by Stanley Kubrick, based on Anthony Burgess's 1962 novel
The Story: Set in a dystopian near-future Britain, the film follows Alex DeLarge (Malcolm McDowell), a charismatic and sadistic delinquent who leads a small gang of "droogs".
Ultraviolence: Alex and his friends spend their nights drinking at the Korova Milkbar before committing random acts of theft, assault, and extreme violence, all while Alex listens to Beethoven.
The Ludovico Technique: After being betrayed by his gang and convicted of murder following a break-in, Alex is incarcerated. He volunteers for an experimental state-sponsored aversion therapy known as the Ludovico Technique
Loss of Free Will: The treatment conditions Alex to experience crippling nausea whenever he encounters or thinks about violence or sex, effectively stripping him of his personal agency and free will.
Revenge and Reversal: Released back into society, a defenseless Alex becomes the victim of his prior victims. After a suicide attempt and a political scandal over the government's methods, his conditioning is reversed, restoring his capacity for violence and his freedom.

Themes and Novel Differences
Free Will vs. Morality: The film explores whether forced goodness is true morality, arguing that a person stripped of the choice to do evil is no longer fully human.
Novel Ending Omission: The film omits the 21st chapter of Anthony Burgess's original novel, which depicts Alex maturing and voluntarily choosing to abandon his violent lifestyle. The film instead ends with Alex remaining unrepentant and imagining himself returning to his old ways.

Controversy and Censorship
Backlash: Upon release, the film sparked intense debate, receiving an X-rating in the United States and facing accusations of glorifying brutality.
The UK Ban: Amid reports of copycat crimes in Britain allegedly inspired by the movie, Stanley Kubrick requested that Warner Bros. withdraw the film from UK distribution in 1973.
Restoration: The movie remained largely unavailable in the UK, Australia, and a few other countries for nearly 30 years until the ban was lifted following Kubrick's death in 1999.
 
zMADLAXz said:
I don't know Lupin. I mean I know there is a Lupin in Harry Potter but he isn't a gentleman thief as far as I know.
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zMADLAXz said:
What is Clockwork Orange. I'll have to see cause this series always pops up whenever I ask about Roman.
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You disgust me.

Anyway Arsène Lupin is a French novel by Maurice Leblanc about a gentleman thief. It was the French's answer to Sherlock Holmes, who appears in the seventh Arsène Lupin book. It is more famous because of the manga/anime that starts the grandson of Arsène Lupin, Lupin III.

Clockwork Orange is a dystopian crime from the 70's
 
cavalal386 said:
You disgust me.

Anyway Arsène Lupin is a French novel by Maurice Leblanc about a gentleman thief. It was the French's answer to Sherlock Holmes, who appears in the seventh Arsène Lupin book. It is more famous because of the manga/anime that starts the grandson of Arsène Lupin, Lupin III.

Clockwork Orange is a dystopian crime from the 70's
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And the theme song, alone, from the Anime Series "Lupin the 3rd" is awesome. In any of its' variations.
 
BaffledSatire said:
I AM A MAN.
I...I know.
GOOD BECAUSE I AM IN FACT A MAN. AND I HAVE THE PENIS TO PROVE- holy shit why do I have a penis?!
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I know it's probably not the one intended, but does Ren now have a wise cracking tiny red dragon, and a lucky cricket following him around?
 
The Arc Clan: Uncle Alexander and Church Sisters Heinkel and Yumiko New
Jaune climbed the last stretch of the worn stone path, boots crunching on the gravel that had been swept into neat piles by some dutiful groundskeeper. The Beacon Cathedral rose before him like a stubborn old sentinel—its gray walls patched and repatched across centuries, stained-glass windows catching the late afternoon sun in fractured rainbows of emerald, sapphire, and gold. He'd read the plaques a dozen times during orientation tours. First Emerald Dynasty temple to the Pagan Gods. Remodeled under the Third when the Dawn Chaser dropped off Tablebreaker missionaries who convinced the royal family the Broken Table was the only truth worth kneeling for. Then the Sixth Jade Dynasty ripped it back to the old Pagans, the Fourth Malachite turned it into a shrine to the God of Animals complete with carved paw prints in the lintels, and then it went back to the Tablebreaker and stayed. Every dynasty after just kept adding wings, spires, and patches until it became the rambling, beautiful mess it was today.

These days it was more museum than sanctuary. No bishop lived here full-time; the airbuses made Sunday services in Vale proper too convenient. Most students only wandered in for the occasional special service or when they needed a quiet place to panic about midterms.

Jaune liked it anyway. The silence felt honest.

He pushed through the heavy oak doors and the scent of old incense, lemon oil, and fresh sawdust hit him all at once.

"Uncle Alex?"

A muffled grunt echoed from the transept. Father Alexander Arc stood on a short ladder, sleeves rolled to the elbows of his black cassock, wrestling with a loose section of crown molding.

"Jaune, lad!" Alexander's face split into a grin as he finished getting the molding back into place. He climbed down, wiping dust on his trousers. As always, he was built like a brick wall that had decided to grow a five o'clock shadow—broad shoulders, sun-creased skin, the same Arc-blue eyes that had stared down Grimm and misbehaving children alike. "Good to see you!"

They clasped forearms the way Arc men did—solid, no-nonsense.

"What are you doing here?" Jaune asked with a laugh, "Why didn't you call ahead?"

"Bringing the orphanage kids to the festival," Alexander said, nodding toward a stack of freshly painted banners leaning against a pew. "Figured I'd give the old girl a spit-shine before the crowds show up. And I tried but eh… Had to protect a village on the way and lost my Scroll. You planning on making us proud in the tournament?"

Jaune rubbed the back of his neck, then caught himself and gave his uncle a determined look. "I'm… I'm gonna put my all into it."

Alexander grinned and nodded.

"Good man. Now… About those women you're leading on?"

Jaune flushed. "Uncle! I'm not-I'm not leading them on!"

Alexander's eyebrow climbed. "Lad, you've got more female attention than any one man has a right to. Pick one already! End it and stop all this turmoil! Your mother thinks you're a shameless playboy!"

Jaune's stomach twisted. "I just… I don't wanna break anyone's heart."

"Pain's unavoidable in this life, lad." Alexander's voice softened, but the steel underneath remained. "Indecision just drags it out longer and makes it meaner. You think I got this far by dithering? You'd never catch me acting so shamelessly."

A side door creaked. Alexander and Jaune's eyes turned to the eastern side door. Alexander's eyes widened.

"Hello, Father."

The woman who stepped through moved like someone who'd spent years walking battlefields and catwalks in equal measure. Tall—easily six feet—statuesque, blonde hair pulled into a severe braid that brushed the small of her back. A black eyepatch covered her left eye; the right was ice-blue and sharp enough to cut. Wolf ears twitched beneath the edge of a long charcoal coat, scarf loose around her throat. An x-shaped Tablebreaker cross rested against her substantial bust, catching the light as she smiled.

Alexander's pleasant expression didn't flicker, but Jaune felt the sudden tension in the air like a drawn bowstring.

"Hello, Sister Heinkel."

Jaune blinked. "Sister?"

"Ja." Heinkel's Allomenian accent rolled the word like a revolver cylinder. "Sister Heinkel Wolfe. I help with the orphanage and Section XIII when the good Father needs someone who can shoot straigh. I also bring good news, Father~!" She produced a crisp parchment with a flourish. "Look. Ze Lion Pope's new decree!"

Alexander took it, eyes scanning. His shoulders sagged on the exhale.

Jaune leaned in. "What is it?"

"To promote family and the fruits of the spirit," Alexander read aloud, voice flat, "Tablebreaker priests now have more latitude to marry and have children… and are strongly encouraged to do so."

Heinkel's grin could have powered half of Vale. "You can't get out of this anymore, Alex~…"

Alexander took a slow, deep breath.

"Lass, it's a bit complicated—"

"HEINKELLLL!"

The opposite side door slammed open hard enough to rattle the nearest stained-glass panel. A Fuujin woman in a modified nun's habit stormed through—black and crimson fabric that somehow managed to look both devout and ready for a street brawl. Her eyes were black and charming behind her large, round glasses, and a katana rested across her back. She pointed an accusing finger at Heinkel, cheeks flushed, eyes sparkling with betrayed fury and something far warmer when they landed on Alexander.

"You said we'd tell him together!"

Heinkel didn't even turn. "You were dithering!"

"You didn't mention me!"

"Why should I?!"

"I—I just want to have a nice conversation with Alexander about OUR future!"

"No, OUR future!"

"OURS!"

Alexander's voice cracked like a whip. "LASSIES! This is a house of God! If you're gonna fight, do it outside!"

Both women froze, then chorused a mortified "Sorry, Father," before scurrying out the side door like scolded schoolgirls.

For three full seconds the cathedral was silent.

Then the world exploded.

Automatic pistol fire stitched the air outside—BRRRRT-BRRT-BRRT—followed by Heinkel's manic laughter and the unmistakable ring of a katana clearing its sheath. "BLOOD OF THE HEATHEN!" Yumiko shrieked, voice bright with holy zeal and romantic rage.

"BITCH HE'S MINE!" Heinkel roared.

More gunfire. A windowpane somewhere on the east side cracked. Something heavy thudded against the stone wall hard enough to shake dust from the rafters.

Jaune slowly turned his head, one eyebrow climbing toward his hairline.

"What was that you were saying about not acting shamelessly-?"

Alexander's glare could have flash-fried a Beowolf. "Shut it."

Jaune bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing.

---

They are both from Hellsing too.

An Alucard chapter is in the works but I have a lot of other crossovers lined up first. But thank you so much for keeping up with the story!

More is on the way!
 
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