Cooking Thread~ Recipes & Things

Those are basically potato chips, not fries

So here, a fun little recipe for steak.

WARNING: This can smoke you out if you don't have a good stove hood. Man your windows, fans, and smoke alarms appropriately.


Ingredients:
1 good steak. You want something about an inch thick, nicely marbled. You're probably not going to get one at your local supermarket, but you don't learn how to cook steak with expensive steak anyway.
A pepper cracker. If you don't have one already, you want one. Get a disposable prefilled one if nothing else.
Kosher salt. Regular salt won't work, it will just burn away.
1 tbsp butter. Real butter, not fake. In a square.
Your favorite oil. I use canola. EDIT: You'll want something with a high smoke point or it'll all just dissapear.

Tools:
Oven
Cast Iron Skillet
Tongs
Really, really good oven mitts.

Prep:
So you've got a thawed steak in your fridge, it's ready to cook, right? Nope, take it out, open it up, and set it aside for 15-30 minutes.
While it's doing that, preheat your oven. How high does it go? Set it to that.
More seriously, you'll want to set your oven to 500F, and a burner on your stovetop to high. (I'm sure you're aware that you're not supposed to set your stovetop to high. In this case, the cast iron skillet can take it.)
Now, take your kosher salt, spread some on the side of the steak facing up. We don't want a coating here, we just want the presence of salt. We're not salting the steak- we just want the salt to help with the juices.
Now crack some pepper on the same side. I prefer less, find out what you like.
Flip the steak over, salt and pepper it the same way.
Brush oil on the top and bottom (NOT the sides) of the steak. This is difficult- if you have too much oil, it flavors the steak and makes it oily. If you have too little oil, heat won't be distributed as well and your steak will charcoal on the outside. Try to wipe the majority off- leave no 'glops' of oil, but leave a solid coat.

Cooking instructions:
To check and see if your skillet is to heat yet, drop a single droplet of oil onto your skillet. If it goes straight past shimmering and dances, it's hot enough. make sure your oven is preheated.
Next, take your steak and drop it in the center of the skillet.
Wait a minute and a half. There will be disturbing amounts of smoke coming out the skillet. This is normal.
Flip the steak.
Wait a minute and a half.
Take you pat of butter and slap it on the middle of your steak. This caramelizes it and gives a nice, nutty flavor.
Get your thickest, best oven mitts on. You're about to pick up 10 pounds of 600 degree cast iron and trying to wrestle it onto your stove rack.
Wrestle it onto your stove rack,.
This next part requires you to know your oven- mine is weirdly shaped and, as such, cooks fast. I can't give you a time here.
But you want the center of the steak to be 115F for rare, 125F for medium rare, and those are the only temperatures that matter

EDIT: A good point of safety info: When you open your oven, there's going to be a huge blast of smoke and heat that will explode straight at your face. You should duck.

Now, take your steak and put it on a warm plate (otherwise you're just sucking all that heat out) and wrap the thing in aluminum foil.
Leave the steak alone. No, seriously, just leave it alone for like 15 minutes. All the juice is squeezing into the center of the steak. Give it some time to let it finish cooking and let the juice redistribute.

After 15 minutes, grab a knife, grab a fork. Put away your ketchup and your steak sauce. This is a steak that's meant to stand alone, and trust me, it will.

 

LOADED POTATO SKINS
Makes 20 stuffed potato skins

Ingredients
10 baking potatoes
250g strong cheddar
250ml sour cream
4 spring onions
1/2 to 1 teaspoon of table salt (or to taste)
good grinding of black pepper
3 teaspoon of Worcestershire sauce

Preparation
Preheat your oven to 200C/180C fan/400F/gas 6. Pricking you potatoes thoroughly and rub a little of the salt on the outsides. Bake for about one and a half hours, or until the skins are crisp and the insides fluffy. As soon as you can bear to tackle the hot potatoes, cut them in half lengthways and scoop out as much of the insides as you can without breaking the skins into a large mixing bowl. (An ice-cream scoop with an insulated handle plus an oven glove works well.)

Put the husk-like skins of the potatoes on a tray and, when cool, cover until you are ready to fill them. Let the potato cool in the bowl, and then cover until needed.

Grate the cheese, and add 200g of it to the cold potato along with the sour cream. Chop the spring onions and add to the potato, with the salt, pepper and Worcestershire sauce. Mix thoroughly (Mixing in the Worcestershire sauce a teaspoon at a time helps mix it properly.)

Spoon the potato filling into the potato skins, and lay each half on a baking tray so they fit snugly together. Sprinkle over the remaining cheese, giving each potato skin a light covering.

Storage
If not being cooked immediately then the skins can be covered loosely and keep in the fridge for up to two days. Alternatively filled potato skins can be wrapped in cling film and frozen for up to one week.

Cooking
Preheat your oven to 200C/180C fan/400F/gas 6.

From chilled or freshly made: cook for twenty to thirty minutes until golden.

To cook from frozen: lay the frozen potato skins on a baking sheet and cover loosely with foil. Cook in the oven for thirty five to forty minutes minutes, removing the foil after the first fifteen minutes.

 

Southern Sweet Tea-

2 cups water
1/2 cup Sugar
6 packets Lipton Tea or equivalent

Put water on. Once it reaches a boil, add tea packets. Boil vigorously for about three minutes, and add sugar. Boil another two minutes, then turn off heat, remove tea-bags, and serve.

Makes 1 mug tea, more or less.

 

Maple Glazed Triple Chocolate Chunk Brownies with Bacon Crumble.

What you need:
Betty Crocker Triple Chocolate Chuck Brownie Mix
1/4 cup 100% Pure Maple Syrup. None of that corn syrup crap.
1 cup Confectioner's Sugar
BACON

Step 1: Betty Crocker Triple Chocolate Chuck Brownie Mix, get some.
Step 2: Mix that shit. People say that you can over-mix but mixing the hell out of it only seems to make it better.
Step 3: BAKE IT.
Step 4: Sift sugar into maple syrup over medium heat. Reduce. Beware for syrup caramelizes easier than sugar.
Step 5: Cook bacon, break into half-inch pieces.
Step 6: Pour glaze onto brownies, then sprinkle bacon on top. Work quickly cause the glaze hardens very fast.

STEP 7: EAT THAT SHIT. MAKE YOUR FRIENDS EAT IT. IT'S FUCKING DELICIOUS.

 

So I makes this on the 1st of the month because I got drunk once and made it on the 1st.

Weird story I know.

It'll probably kill me unfortunately as it's very unhealthy.

The Artery Clogging Meatato Explosion
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
What you'll need:
-6 potatoes(not sure which but about the size of a coke can)
-A bag of cheese cubes(quarter pound)
-thing of chopped green onions(container is the size of a box made of bread)
-2 rolls of sausage
-pack of bacon

Take the potatoes and wrap them in saran wrap(88cents a potato pre wrapped at walmart) poke holes into potatoes
Put potatoes in microwave turning every 5 minutes until soft

Brown sausage through

Cut bacon into chunks then brown

Cut cooked potatoes into chunks

Toss everything into large pot and mix

Then eat and enjoy your heart attack.

 

1 Extra-Thin Pizza Shell
1/2 lb mild Italian Sausage
1/4 lb Mozzarella, grated
1/4 lb Cheddar, grated
1/2 large bottle Marinara
3 Tbsp Sriracha

Sautee sausage, drain grease. Preheat oven to 425. Grease pizza pan, place shell on it. Spread Marinara and Sriracha on shell. Add sausage, then cover with cheese.

Bake 12 minutes.

Remove from heat, cool, and slice.

 

Best bacon I've ever had.

Rather than using a pan, heat up a pot on a burner. After it's hot enough, cut your strips of bacon into three pieces (you can make more, but I find that thirds are the best size), and put them into the pot. Don't cover the pot. After that, just let it cook, and you'll have some nice, crispy bacon. It works best if you use a lot of bacon, and a relatively small pot, since the grease will basically deep-fry the bacon.

 

Just made some deviled eggs that came out pretty good as a sorta early mother's day thing, thought I'd share:

What you need:
9 XL eggs*
Mayo
Mustard
Paprika
Ranch Dressing (optional)
Salt (optional)
Vinegar (I used white wine but any kind should work. Pickle brine also works well in place of plain vinegar)
A stove
A pot
A slotted spoon (or something you can fake it with to scoop eggs out of hot water)
A fork
A knife
A good sized bowl
Something to put your eggs on or in
Water

It's best to use eggs that have been in your fridge for a week or so. If they're too fresh they're harder to peel. I did 9 here because we had that many left in the older carton and it was a good amount of eggs to fill up our deviled egg platter + a few extras for 'quality control'. This is one of those recipes that doesn't take that much more work to do a big batch than a small one so you'll probably want to do the biggest batch you think you'll eat before they go off so you get the biggest reward for your effort.

Get a pot big enough to fit all your eggs in a single layer at the bottom. Fill it with cold water to about an inch above your eggs. Leaving the pot uncovered for now, bring to a full boil over high heat. Once the pot's boiling good, cover and remove from heat. Let it stand for 15 minutes.

When the 15 minutes starts going down, fill a bowl with ice water (just cold will do if you don't have an ice maker or whatever, but ice is better here). Once the time is up, transfer the eggs from the hot water to the ice water. I find a slotted spoon works well for this. Let them cool for at least 5 minutes.

Get your eggs out of the bowl and empty the water. If you only have one big bowl or you don't want to make more dishes, dry the bowl out now, cause you'll need it again in a bit.

Peel your eggs. I like to put down a paper towel, lightly tap them around the wide end on the counter to crack them at the air pocket there and then gently roll them a bit under my palm to crack them up all around before peeling off the shell, using the membrane to help get big swaths of it in one go then rinsing them under cold water after to get any shell fragments that may be left off but everyone has their own techniques for this. Experiment a little, you'll find something that works for you. If you actually want them to look fancy the first time you're doing this you'll probably want to make a few extras cause you'll probably screw up an a egg or three. If you don't care about looks they'll still work fine unless you absolutely mangle them though.

Once all your eggs are peeled, slice them in half the long way. Pop both halves of the yolk out into your bowl and lay the whites out on your tray or whatever you're using with the hole where the yolk went facing upwards. Using a fork, crumble up all the yolks fairly finely. Add 1/2-3/4 of a cup of mayo (depending on the consistency you want), a bit of ranch dressing (to taste) if you like (use slightly less mayo if you do), 1&1/2 tablespoons of mustard, a pinch of salt (if you like) and one tablespoon of vinegar. Stir it all together until it's nice and creamy.

Use the fork to fill in all your eggs. You may need more utensils to properly clear out the bowl. With the extra material each egg should be heaped a bit.

Lightly sprinkle your eggs with paprika. You can eat them at this point, but they're better if you leave them in the fridge to chill for a while before you do.

 

Thought I'd add another thing I made today, polish style potato pancakes:

What you need:
Lots of potatoes
Onion
Flour
Eggs
Salt and Pepper
Oil (usually use canola)
A peeler
A grater (or a food processor that can stand in for one)
A stove
A nice big mixing bowl
A frying pan

Optional:
Lemon juice*
Cottage Cheese or Applesauce to garnish them once they're done


So this is another recipe where a big batch isn't much harder than a small batch. And you'll definitely want to go big for these, they're pretty labor intensive to do so leftovers make the whole thing much more rewarding. This is also probably something you'll want help with. One person can do this, but it's a lot easier if you have 2-3 people to divvy up tasks between.


The actual doing is fairly simple: peel and coarsely grate up your potatoes and onion, add eggs, flour and a bit of salt and pepper. Ratios are 2 eggs and 2-3 tablespoons of flour + 1 small-medium onion (or half a big onion) for every 2 pounds or so of potatoes. You want just enough egg and flour to bind it without making it taste super eggy or floury. Stir it all up well then let it sit in your fridge for 10-15 minutes or so. This gives the mixture a chance to set up a bit.

Once it's set you'll want to heat up a generous amount of oil in a skillet. You're not trying to deep fry these or anything but it should definitely be well coated. Medium to Medium-High heat works well. Once it's nice and hot add a couple pancakes. Each one should be about 1/3 of a cup worth of your mixture. Cook till it's golden brown on both sides then put on some paper towels to cool a bit and soak up excess oil before eating. You'll want to rotate the pancakes in place a few times on each side so they cook evenly all around and you'll need to add a bit of oil between batches.

They go really well topped with applesauce or cottage cheese but are also good plain. You could probably put other stuff on there too I guess.

*if you're doing a big batch you can add a small amount of lemon juice to your potatoes every so often as you're grating and mix it through to prevent the potatoes oxidizing and going all bluish, doesn't actually hurt anything if they do though so this is strictly optional

 

Simple Seared Fish

It is less recipe and more technique, I guess. Yes, yes, searing won't seal the juice or something like that, but it will result in juicier fish. Go bug actual chef for reason.

Anyway, you will need:

A fish. I usually use tuna, but I think other kind of fish can be used as well.
Salt.
Vegetable oil. I use palm oil, but that's more because it is the most widely-available one, here.

A large skillet/frying pan. Sticky one is far preferable, but non-stick is possible.
Stove. Obviously.

Optional:
Pepper. I always forgot to add one, but salt is enough anyway.

Process:
1. Fillet the fish. Cut it further to your preference - do make sure it is at most 1 cm thick, which is, err, 3 inches, I guess? Why can't we use metric?
2. Make sure the fish's surface is as dry as possible. Use paper towel, or even tissue, to dry it.
3. Sprinkle salt at skin side of the fillet. Left it for 20 minutes or so.
4. Add oil to your frying pan. I use something like two tablespoon per 4 fillets.
5. Turn on your stove, to the hottest possible. Wait until the oil is smoking. Then Immediately put the fish on the pan, skinside down.
6. Let it be for couple minutes. After 3/4 is cooked (look at the side of the fillet), flip it.
7. Turn off your stove - the remaining heat should be enough to cook your fish.
8. Transfer it to plate; add pepper, if you wish. Eat immediately - leaving it too long may cause the juice to leak out!


Simple Risotto

Much like searing, Risotto is more technique than specific recipe. It kinda remind me with fried rice, honestly, though of course,it is not... well, not precisely.

Anyway, you will need:
White rice. I use 3/4 litre for 2 portions. I think brown rice can be used, but I've yet to try it, so...
Stock. Use whatever you want - fish, poultry, beef, vegetable.
Onion.
Shallot.
Garlic.
Celery head.
Salt. Maybe pepper, I guess.
Vegetable oil, roughly 3 tbs.

Frying pan.
Saucepan, or whatever to hold the stock while it is heated.
Stove.

Process:
1. Heat the stock at separate pan, keep it low.
2. Wash the white rice
3. Chop the onion, shallot, garlic, and celery head.
4. Put the oil at the frying pan.
5. Turn on the stove - keep it low.
6. Saute the onion, shallot, garlic, chopped celery, until you can smell the aroma.
7. Add the rice. Stir it, until it is coated with oil.
8. Add a ladle of stock to the pan. Keep stirring the rice, until all the stock absorbed.
9. Keep adding stock, wait until it is absorbed, then add another ladle of stock... etcetera, until the rice is cooked, with a slight bite to the taste.
10. Do add pepper and salt if that's your preference.
11. Add a final ladle of stock, then put a lid on your pan for a minute or two. Turn off the stove.
12. Transfer to plate. Eat immediately.

Huh. Translating recipe ain't easy, I swear.

 

Black Bean Tortillas
1.5 cups/1 can cooked black beans
salsa (about a 1/2 cup)
shredded cheese (about a cup) x2
1.5 cups/1 can refried beans
handful spinach leaves, chopped (or frozen package, use less salsa due to liquid content)
Tortillas, 1 package from store

Mash the black beans with a fork or dough masher.
Add the salsa, mash some more.
Add the cheese x1, mash some more.
Add the refried beans, mash some more.
Add spinach, mash some more.
Refrigerate if you aren't using it at once.

Heat oven to 350 degrees.
On a baking sheet, over aluminum foil place a tortilla and large spoonful of Black Bean filling.
Spread the filling so it occupies half the tortilla.
Add any toppings like lettuce, chopped black olives, onions, spanish rice, whatever.
Sprinkle some shredded cheese over the filling.
Fold the tortilla over so it is a taco shape.
Repeat until the sheet is full of tortillas.
Bake 12 minutes.

 

Maple Bourbon Bacon Jam

Prep Time: 10 minutes Cook Time: 1 hour 50 minutes Total Time: 2 hoursServings: 1
A sweet, salty, smoky, spicy and down right tasty bacon jam that is the definition of umami! This bacon jam goes well on toast for breakfast and makes for a great condiment in sandwiches and burgers of all sorts!

ingredients

• 1 pound thick smoked bacon, cut into 1 inch pieces
• 1 large onion, sliced
• 4 cloves garlic, chopped
• 1/4 cup cider vinegar
• 3/4 cup coffee (brewed)
• 1/4 cup brown sugar
• 1/4 cup maple syrup
• 1/4 cup bourbon
• 1-2 chipotle chilis in adobo, chopped
• 1/2 teaspoon cumin
• pepper to taste

directions

1. Cook the bacon in a large sauce pan an over medium heat until the fat has rendered and the bacon starts to get crispy and set aside, reserving 1 tablespoon of the grease in the pan.
2. Add the onions and saute until tender, about 5-7 minutes.
3. Add the garlic and saute until fragrant, about a minute.
4. Add the vinegar and deglaze the pan.
5. Add the coffee, brown sugar, maple syrup, bourbon, bacon, chipotle chilies, cumin and pepper, reduce the heat and simmer until reduced to a syrupy consistency, about 1-2 hours.
6. Process the jam in a food processor to smooth it out a bit but not too much as you want to have the texture of the bacon.
7. If you do not finish it all in one sitting, store it in a sealed container in the fridge for up to 4 weeks.

 

Bacon Cheeseburger Poptarts

Ingredients
Bacon Onion Jam
1 lb bacon, diced
2 medium onions, diced
1/4 cup brown sugar
1/3 cup strong coffee
1/2 cup water
1 Tbsp balsamic vinegar

Burger
1 lb extra lean ground beef
1/4 cup onion, diced
2 cloves garlic, minced
salt & pepper
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp onion powder

Pastry
2 cups flour
1 Tbsp sugar
pinch salt
1 cup butter, cold
1 egg
2 - 4 Tbsp buttermilk

Extras
cheese
1 egg, beaten
sesame seeds, toasted

Directions
Prepare Bacon Onion Jam - in a large frying pan, fry bacon until it is done but not crispy. Remove cooked bacon and set aside. Drain off all but about a tablespoon of the bacon grease. Add the onions to the pan.
Cook and stir until onions begin to soften, about 5 minutes.
Turn heat to low and add sugar, coffee, water, and the bacon back to the pan.
Let simmer until mixture is thick and reduced, like jam, about 30 minutes, stirring approx every 5 minutes or so to prevent burning.

Spoiler

Remove from heat and stir in the balsamic vinegar. If you are happy with the texture then leave as is, if it seems to thick/chunky then pulse briefly (two or three times) in a blender or food processor to thin it down (see photo below).

Spoiler

You can use this immediately or refrigerate for up to a week. (For the purpose of using in this recipe - chill in fridge until ready to use.)
Prepare Burger mixture - In the frying pan you cooked the Bacon Onion Jam in, cook the beef, onion, and garlic until beef is no longer pink. Sprinkle with spices and stir to evenly distribute.
When everything is cooked, drain the beef to remove any excess liquid.

Spoiler

Let cool. (You can place in fridge to accelerate this process)
Prepare Pastry - In a large mixing bowl, stir together flour, sugar, and salt. Cut in the cold butter using a pastry blender or 2 butter knives. (You can also pulse this all together in a blender or food processor). Mixture should resemble coarse crumbs.
Beat together the egg and 2 Tbsp buttermilk. Using a fork, stir the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients until dough comes together. (You may need to add more buttermilk, a tablespoon at a time, until desired consistency is reached.)
Pat dough into a ball and divide into 4.

Spoiler

Cover and let rest for at least 10 - 15 minutes.
Assemble Poptarts - Preheat oven to 350.
Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper, set aside.
Roll out one quarter of the dough into a 12 X 8 rectangle. Cut out 8, 3 X 4 little rectangles. (In the photo below you can see one of my Poptarts is a little smaller than the others. I didn't quite cut my dough into equal quarters so this quarter had a little less dough than the others!)
Using a pastry or basting brush, brush each rectangle with a little of the beaten egg, being sure to get right up to the edge.

Spoiler

Top 4 of the rectangles with a generous spoonful of the cooled hamburger mixture.
Then top with a spoonful of the Bacon Onion Jam. (In the photo below I also topped some with Sue's Rhubarb Relish {we'll share that recipe with you soon!}- middle one, some with just bacon bits - beside the little one, and left one plain -the tiny one on the side.) Be careful to leave about 1/4 inch border around the outside so you can seal the Poptart.

Spoiler

Now top with a little bit of cheese. Again, don't go too crazy! You don't want your Poptart to explode apart.

Spoiler

Flip the bottom piece of dough up over the top piece, so the eggy side is facing in, and lightly press together around the edges.
Using a fork, press the edges firmly together. Then poke a couple of holes on top for the steam to escape.

Spoiler

Brush the tops of the Poptarts with more beaten egg and then sprinkle generously with toasted sesame seeds.

Spoiler

Repeat with remaining pieces of dough until you have used it all up. I got 16 Poptarts total with some of the hamburger filling and bacon jam left over. (You could probably make another batch of dough and get another dozen or so out of the filling.) Place all Poptarts onto prepared cookie sheet.

Spoiler

Bake at 350 until tops are golden brown and pastry is puffed, about 25 - 35 minutes.

Spoiler

Let cool about 5 - 10 minutes before serving. (You can also freeze these and then reheat them in the oven when you want to serve them. I did 350 for about 20 minutes and they were just like when I first made them.)

Spoiler

I could just look at these all day. They're so pretty.

Spoiler

Want a bite?
I'm even willing to share...

Spoiler

You can't see the melty cheese...but it's in there.

Spoiler

We loved the Bacon Onion Jam and the Rhubarb Relish in these. You could also simplify things and top your hamburger with a little mustard and ketchup or even a small bit of chopped pickles.
Go crazy!
Call it a Poptart or whatever you want...but one thing is for sure, you will call it delicious!

We're sharing at these fab linky parties! Be sure to check them out! -

 

Mini Cheeseburger Bites







Here's a recipe when you're looking for an appetizer or snack to serve your family or company. Enjoy!

1 package refrigerator garlic crescent rolls
1 pound hamburger
1/2 cup diced onion
1 cup frozen mixed vegetables
2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce
1/2 teaspoon seasoned salt
1/4 teaspoon black ground pepper
6 slices American cheese, quartered

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. In large skillet, brown hamburger. Add onion, mixed vegetables, Worcestershire sauce, seasoned salt and black pepper. Cook on medium heat until onion is tender and vegetables have cooked through, about 10 minutes.

Meanwhile, prepare mini tart pan. Spray with cooking oil. Roll out crescent and press together at seams. Divide and cut into 24 squares. Press each square into the tart cups, pressing along the bottom and sides. Spoon meat mixture into each cup. Place cheese quarters on top of each prepared cup. Bake for 15-20 minutes until crust is golden brown. Makes 24 bites.

 

Recipe for pork chops covered in buttermilk and Parmesan cheese.
Dip chops in buttermilk; then in bread crumbs.
(If meat is tough, let soak in buttermilk all day)
Put on cookie sheet; sprinkle w/garlic salt and Parmesan cheese
Bake at 400 F for 45 minutes (or longer until brown)
Don't turn the chops!
Spray pan first