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General chat thread

Reader mode
You know how iconic the image of a cat on the evil mastermind's lap is? I assume James Bond was the source.

But it's just proof that evil masterminds are no better at keeping the cat off their lap while working than anyone else.
 
I recall a quote where a bad guy calls a good(?) guy "Wasted material!" during a fight (could have been "waste of material"; they sound similar). But I can't place it.

Sure it's not anime or a book because I recall it spoken in English and I haven't watched dubbed anime in like 20 years. Fairly sure it's not Star Trek or Doctor Who since I stuck both into chakoteya.net and got no relevant results, although it's possible there's a typo in the transcripts or it's something that only sounds similar. I thought it was Ra's al-Ghul (the real one) from Batman Begins, but I checked all the fight scenes with him and it didn't show up.
 
Also, I've finally started uploading my writing to another thread, is this a good place to plug it?
 
Longtimelurker said:
Also, I've finally started uploading my writing to another thread, is this a good place to plug it?
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You are probably better served to go to one of the threads dedicated to whatever genre or fandom you're writing in to plug it there.

Also: you can put the link to the story in your signature as a relatively not-annoying method of advertising.
 
TanaNari said:
You are probably better served to go to one of the threads dedicated to whatever genre or fandom you're writing in to plug it there.

Also: you can put the link to the story in your signature as a relatively not-annoying method of advertising.
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It's *Gulp* original.
But I will put it in my signature. Thank you for the advice.
 
Looked through the thread, looks pretty neat. With such a big world with diverse factions it would be cool to see a bunch of different perspectives.

Dragon Lizard people are gonna rise up soon though. Someone should probably get on that at some point.
 
GhostHaxStomp said:
Looked through the thread, looks pretty neat. With such a big world with diverse factions it would be cool to see a bunch of different perspectives.

Dragon Lizard people are gonna rise up soon though. Someone should probably get on that at some point.
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Thank you, that means a lot
TheMidnightRook said:
So plug it in the sci-fi thread
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I am very sorry, I cannot find the sci-fi thread that you are talking about
 
I was manning the front desk of the computer lab today. Usually I get adults wanting to access the computers and print things today, but today I got a pair of boys who wanted me to make a photocopy of a juice bottle of all things. :p

They liked the pattern and wanted to display it on their bikes. He only had enough money for one paper and they wanted two, so I just gave them the second for free. Lol.

I will be telling this story for years to come.
 
Autocorruptor said:
I will be telling this story for years to come.
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Oh I have a couple of those. The first one was how I served on a jury for a court case over an exotic dancer. It was still boring.


The second was when I took my driver's education test and was told the following by my instructor...

"I don't scare easily, but your driving scares me. I wish I could fail you, but I legally can't".

I got my driver's license that day. I didn't leave feeling great about it, though.
 
Autocorruptor said:
I will be telling this story for years to come.
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So, a good while ago I was working at a fried chicken restaurant, drive through in the late evening. A lady pulls up to the window with (I assume) her daughter in the passenger's seat. When I open the window, the daughter yells "Hey Hot Stuff!" and her mother turns and hits her shoulder. They're both smiling and laughing. I smile with them but remain professional, taking their money and telling them their order will be ready in a bit (they got a family meal, I think, lots of chicken.) Then I went back to doing- whatever it was I did between orders while I waited for the rest of theirs to come out. It was a busy night though, so it took a few minutes, and I stopped after a bit, looking around for something else that needed to be done... when I happened to check the window, maybe six feet away from it at that point.

They're both looking my way... and the daughter, seeing me looking, opens her mouth and starts rolling her tongue around in a vaguely lewd fashion. Her mother sees me snerk, turns to see what she's doing, and smacks her again. They both turn back to look at me just as I stick my tongue out- nothing fancy, just to the chin. I mean, I'm no Gene Simmons, but... well, both their jaws drop. I laugh, wipe my chin off on my shoulder, and get back to work. A few minutes later I open the window to hand them their order... and the daughter yells "My friend in the back wants your number!"

I laughed, gave her mother the food (after she smacked her daughter again) and wished them a happy evening.

~~~

Then there was the more recent thing when I worked security at a high-dollar hotel. Not five-star or anything, but in the middle of downtown with lots of rich traffic. This was not the average "Sir, please wear pants in the hallway."

I begin my patrol on the 17th floor. The floors were in an L shape, so I first turn left outside of the elevators, around the corner along the shorter hallway to check the stairs on that side before going to the other end to go down.

As I turn the corner, the first door past the corner opens on the right. I look at the man standing there- older guy, kinda overweight but not fat... and completely naked. I look down to check that he is indeed not wearing anything, then look back up, raising an eyebrow in the process. He shuts the door.

And then there was the night when I discovered it is possible to be too drunk to use a vending machine... second-hand, thankfully.

And then there was the bat... three times, I tell people there's a bat in the stairwell.

"So?"

"It's a bat!"

"So bring it down and put it in the lost and found."

"What?"

"Or throw it in the trash."

"No, it's not a baseball bat, it's a bat, you know, a flying mouse, flap flap squeak squeak?"

Three times I had this conversation, and not a single one of them with the authority to pass it on and maybe have the owner call animal control gave a single fuck.

I finally found him when he was too tuckered out to fly away after panicking up and down the stairwell on the third day. He was hanging from the top of one of those in-door windows, with his front against the glass, so I made a cup out of my suit-jacket's arm and scooped him gently into it, held my other hand over the top to keep him in, raised both hands above my head so I wouldn't trip over the other sleeve, and went down fourteen flights of stairs like that to the ground floor so I could get him outside. He was pretty well-behaved- didn't bite or really scratch me, though he tried to get out a few times he didn't actually resort to violence. Showed a picture to a friend later and she told me it was a "Mexican Freetail."

That was the second bat I've ever removed from a site I was working at. The first was a bit more exciting because it was very energetic- and its echolocation could not apparently pick up a single open door. Opening a set of double doors for it to get out finally worked, thankfully, but I had to chase it around shutting doors behind it for an hour before I managed to corner it in a spot I could do that.
 
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Well I just about had a heart attack. Computer seemed to suddenly crash and wouldn't turn back on. I spent about 3k on this rig- maybe two or three years ago, but it's still in damn good shape and runs games damn good- and it's the second time this has happened in the past few weeks. Last time I thought it was the VR Video program I was using being a bloated hunk of junk. This time it happened just after I hit exit VR mode and went to hang up my headset. I thought something had burned out.

Nope, my goddamned power cord was loose and the vr cable is hanging near it. Probably bumped it free both times.
 
Been reading about Audie Murphy. Real interesting character, that one. Went to Italy as an underweight and impoverished kid from Texas, came out the most decorated US soldier in history. His films actually had to tone down some of his wartime feats to make it more "realistic".

Damn shame that he went loopy after the war, though. He got this creepy unblinking stare, used to wake up at night screaming and shooting (nearly shot his wife after one of his freak outs, which contributed to his divorce), had sudden bizarre flashes of violent rage whenever he got into fights (which was far too often), and even got addicted to painkillers or something.
 
Treble said:
Been reading about Audie Murphy. Real interesting character, that one. Went to Italy as an underweight and impoverished kid from Texas, came out the most decorated US soldier in history. His films actually had to tone down some of his wartime feats to make it more "realistic".

Damn shame that he went loopy after the war, though. He got this creepy unblinking stare, used to wake up at night screaming and shooting (nearly shot his wife after one of his freak outs, which contributed to his divorce), had sudden bizarre flashes of violent rage whenever he got into fights (which was far too often), and even got addicted to painkillers or something.
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PTSD does things to a man. Happens all too often in war. Though at least with regards to his painkiller addiction, he continued his long track record of incredible deeds by deciding to quit all on his own: i.e., going cold-turkey via locking himself in a motel room for a week straight. The man was a legend, and rightfully so. There's a reason why he has a Sabaton song dedicated to him. Shame that he died from, of all things, an airplane crash.
 
Does anyone have stories of getting boners during unfortunate times? When I was a kid, (about 11 or 12 i think?) i got a boner that just wouldn't go down for some reason. Unfortunately, i had to attend a wedding with my parents that same day. Where i grew up, the clothes we wear to such occasions tend to be very thin in material. So i had to spend the entire event trying to cover my boner / hide it from view. And this was a place where there weren't many tables around either. It was pretty embarassing as a kid.
 
salteider said:
Does anyone have stories of getting boners during unfortunate times? When I was a kid, (about 11 or 12 i think?) i got a boner that just wouldn't go down for some reason. Unfortunately, i had to attend a wedding with my parents that same day. Where i grew up, the clothes we wear to such occasions tend to be very thin in material. So i had to spend the entire event trying to cover my boner / hide it from view. And this was a place where there weren't many tables around either. It was pretty embarassing as a kid.
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One of my cats once woke me up by leaping, claws outstretched, after confusing my morning wood for a sneaky mouse hiding under the sheets. Does that count?
 
salteider said:
Does anyone have stories of getting boners during unfortunate times?
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Does all of highschool count as a single unfortunate time, or would that be multiple?

Funniest specific time that I remember would be during AP History when looking at a classmate, but luckily the teacher was older than sin so I just stared at her until the big guy calmed down.
 
During a meeting. I had to introduce myself. Thankfully, everyone was bored half to sleep and probably wouldn't have noticed if I started singing the national anthem.
 
Amazon Climber said:
One of my cats once woke me up by leaping, claws outstretched, after confusing my morning wood for a sneaky mouse hiding under the sheets. Does that count?
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Could have been much worse. It could have bitten down, lol. If it actually mistook your dick for a mouse.

evildice said:
Funniest specific time that I remember would be during AP History when looking at a classmate, but luckily the teacher was older than sin so I just stared at her until the big guy calmed down.
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I don't think i've ever gotten a boner by actually looking at a girl in person. Its easy to hide a boner in class tho due to tables.
 
MadGreenSon said:
Ever take a car to be checked over and have them end up finding a million things wrong?

That's me with my doctor appointment.

9am 07/14 I go in, now I'm bored as shit and super uncomfortable in the hospital for overnight observation.
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I've been there. That was me at fifteen. They found a lot of little things wrong with me.

That's the thing with little things, they aren't individually enough to do anything about.

Hang in there.
 
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