1. Due to issues with external spam filters, QQ is currently unable to send any mail to Microsoft E-mail addresses. This includes any account at live.com, hotmail.com or msn.com. Signing up to the forum with one of these addresses will result in your verification E-mail never arriving. For best results, please use a different E-mail provider for your QQ address.
    Dismiss Notice
  2. For prospective new members, a word of warning: don't use common names like Dennis, Simon, or Kenny if you decide to create an account. Spammers have used them all before you and gotten those names flagged in the anti-spam databases. Your account registration will be rejected because of it.
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Since it has happened MULTIPLE times now, I want to be very clear about this. You do not get to abandon an account and create a new one. You do not get to pass an account to someone else and create a new one. If you do so anyway, you will be banned for creating sockpuppets.
    Dismiss Notice
  4. If you wish to change your username, please ask via conversation to tehelgee instead of asking via my profile. I'd like to not clutter it up with such requests.
    Dismiss Notice
  5. Due to the actions of particularly persistent spammers and trolls, we will be banning disposable email addresses from today onward.
    Dismiss Notice
  6. A note about the current Ukraine situation: Discussion of it is still prohibited as per Rule 8
    Dismiss Notice
  7. The rules regarding NSFW links have been updated. See here for details.
    Dismiss Notice
Mail delivery issues Usernames Rule 4 Clarification Username Change Requests Disposable Email Addresses Ukraine Rule update
John_Oakman
Joined:
Sep 27, 2016
Messages:
10,692
Likes Received:
260,542

Following 1

  1. Cyberweasel89

Followers 61

  1. Coleray
  2. Charles Markov
  3. corndogman
  4. Mquz
  5. Alejandro7u7
  6. Lemonbarb
Show All
Gender:
Male

John_Oakman

Come touch my hentai machine, Male

Stolen valor is just shitty cosplayers getting called out on their shitty cosplay. May 26, 2023 at 11:48 PM

    1. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Stolen valor is just shitty cosplayers getting called out on their shitty cosplay.
      May 26, 2023 at 11:48 PM
    2. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Executing the hero after he defeated the maou is basically generic fantasy isekai's version of demobilization.
      May 19, 2023
    3. Guardian Box
      Guardian Box
      would you be offended if I called you "The Chicken Man"?
      Apr 29, 2023
      2. View previous comments...
      3. Guardian Box
        Guardian Box
        you cheeky bugger

        how long have you waited to make that joke :V
        Apr 29, 2023
        Imabot likes this.
      4. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        My family started raising hens and my brother took advantage of the fact to snap a pic.
        Apr 29, 2023
        Imabot likes this.
      5. Guardian Box
        Guardian Box
        so a pun that spans generations

        not something one sees every day let me tell you :V
        Apr 29, 2023
    4. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Hol up, has no one here ever read any of Dorsai novels?
      Apr 14, 2023
      1. sendali likes this.
      2. ZurigaSungama
        ZurigaSungama
        Are they any good?
        Apr 14, 2023
      3. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        Very solid worldbuilding in creating multiple cultures that aren't 1 dimensional, some of the plots of individual novels might be dated, but overall pretty good. Also has an FTL system that sidestep the whole time dilation thing (sort of).
        Apr 14, 2023
        ZurigaSungama likes this.
      4. sendali
        sendali
        Soldier, Ask Not.
        and remember, the first rule of gambling is to never gamble.
        Apr 14, 2023
        John_Oakman likes this.
    5. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Don't you hate it when you finished writing a really good chapter, but now has to slog through a bunch just to reach that point?
      Apr 4, 2023
    6. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      If you think about it, the average story in SFW is probably of a higher quality than the ones in NSFW.
      Feb 15, 2023
      1. Venyr4434 and Treble like this.
      2. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        Because usually they haul in a fraction of the likes and feedback, so are far more likely to be fueled by passion for the project itself.
        Feb 15, 2023
        Venyr4434 and Treble like this.
      3. Treble
        Treble
        Implying that passion is proportional to quality....
        Mar 20, 2023
    7. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      After talking to someone from Ohio, I'm convinced that the entire Dead Space trilogy took place in that state.
      Jan 23, 2023
    8. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Есть у нас ещё в резерве Деньги, водка и консервы, И могила, занесённая песком.
      Jan 23, 2023
    9. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Gmax is finally dead as the dodo, time to move on to blender.
      Jan 17, 2023
    10. Megaolix
      Megaolix
      You know you don't have to comment on every hacked account spam thread? Just report and move on, we nuke the threads.
      Jan 15, 2023
      1. ZurigaSungama likes this.
      2. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        I'm just doing it for entertainment purposes.
        Jan 15, 2023
    11. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      QQ, QQ, the capital of the degenerates. QuestionableQuesting, no shame, nor any glory.
      Dec 16, 2022
    12. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Где надежда уйдёт как жена, всё потом, всё потом.
      Dec 12, 2022
      2. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        Yes, your waifu will leave you too.
        Dec 12, 2022
    13. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      If you follow me because of shit I wrote years ago, prepared to be disappointed as fuck.
      Dec 6, 2022
    14. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Пускай не судит однобоко Нас кабинетный грамотей.
      Nov 14, 2022
    15. Nicodemus
      Nicodemus
      You got your blues ready, lol?

      You have one Nut Pass for the our birthday, and one for veterans day, make them count.
      Nov 10, 2022
      1. John_Oakman likes this.
      2. View previous comments...
      3. Nicodemus
        Nicodemus
        No barracks bunny to help you get an NJP? Damn, that sucks.
        Nov 10, 2022
        John_Oakman likes this.
      4. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        Everyone else is already shitfaced and someone got a crossbow- I mean nothing new or unusual to report at this time...
        Nov 10, 2022
        Nicodemus likes this.
      5. Nicodemus
        Nicodemus
        Obviously you need to get your standard issue green dildo (weenie) and attack it to a bolt. Fire it up in the air and have everyone open their mouths.
        Nov 10, 2022
        John_Oakman likes this.
    16. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      In the last week I managed to write -1k words. That's right, I deleted what I had wrote due to some RL observations...
      Oct 15, 2022
    17. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      I'm gonna be real here, I'm probably gonna be on a hiatus for the rest of the year due to some RL things. Not a full stop, but a slowdown.
      Sep 19, 2022
      2. GhanAyllan
        GhanAyllan
        I hope its not something bad and good luck
        Sep 20, 2022
        John_Oakman likes this.
      3. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        It's nothing bad, just life happens.
        Sep 20, 2022
        GhanAyllan likes this.
    18. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Ну а если вдруг не выйду из огня, Ты найдёшь себе другого От несчастия такого, И, быть может, позабудешь про меня.
      Sep 13, 2022
      2. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        The fate of every fanfic writer who falls form grace for whatever reasons...
        Sep 13, 2022
    19. Merlin
      Merlin
      Thank you my dear John of John, son of John, descendant of John the Great of the House of John
      Sep 2, 2022
      1. Lemonbarb and John_Oakman like this.
      2. Lemonbarb
        Lemonbarb
        ... If only, you were a magnificent cock, free of the Amazon rain forest pissing on all the online literature I hold dear.
        Sep 2, 2022
        Merlin likes this.
    20. Autocorruptor
      Autocorruptor
      COME HERE, LEMME TOUCH YO HENTAI MACHINE.
      Aug 31, 2022
      1. Lemonbarb and John_Oakman like this.
      2. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        You come to me. I'm American, and my mobility scooter just ran out of power!
        Aug 31, 2022
        Lemonbarb and Autocorruptor like this.
      3. Lemonbarb
        Lemonbarb
        Foolish american! You should have stuck on yer bike!
        Sep 2, 2022
    21. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Touch grass.
      Aug 3, 2022
      1. Lemonbarb likes this.
      2. d.fish
        d.fish
        Smoke grass.
        Aug 3, 2022
        Merlin likes this.
      3. Lemonbarb
        Lemonbarb
        ...
        Sep 2, 2022
    22. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      While evil might not necessarily have consequences in my stories, stupidity certainly does...
      Jun 22, 2022
      1. Lemonbarb and FTR2017 like this.
    23. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Is it really grimderp if I just bum ideas from history?
      May 24, 2022
      1. FTR2017 likes this.
      2. View previous comments...
      3. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        Well, I'll try to do both at the same time. We'll see how that goes...
        May 25, 2022
        FTR2017 likes this.
      4. FTR2017
        FTR2017
        If you go that way, I suggest going with satire, lampoon the shit out of the idiocy that happens IRL at the highest levels! Think Dilbert and Yes, Minister for two nice examples of fine black comedy. ;)
        May 25, 2022
        John_Oakman likes this.
      5. Lemonbarb
        Lemonbarb
        At risk of dabbing into a certain rule. My mental grimderp ~/~ Bullet Politics. Or...

        "Kill impulse", being a valid excuse for edge lord and hard men tier decisions. It's a 'hard' choice, when people er "threats" are killed.
        Sep 2, 2022
    24. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      I do some research for my stories, I also chose to ignore the research when it gets in the way of the grimderp.
      May 21, 2022
      1. Lemonbarb and FTR2017 like this.
    25. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Время выбрало этих парней, Время выбрало эту страну.
      May 13, 2022
      2. Lemonbarb
        Lemonbarb
        Google says it as; "Time has chosen these guys, Time has chosen this country"

        At a dark stretch, rather fitting, given the interesting times we're in. Is all I'll say.
        Sep 2, 2022
      3. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        Sep 2, 2022
    26. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      On second thought, I think I'll write more cheerful and light hearted isekais instead...
      May 12, 2022
      2. John_Oakman
        John_Oakman
        Or both, I can and have started multiple projects at the same time...
        May 12, 2022
    27. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      Relationship subreddits have the best NTR stories. Even better when you can pretend they're even true!
      Feb 26, 2022
      1. Lemonbarb and Evilhippy like this.
      2. Alaabalanalah
        Alaabalanalah
        NTR is good for the soul. Delicious
        Feb 26, 2022
        Evilhippy and John_Oakman like this.
      3. LordOfPears12
        LordOfPears12
        Ntr is bad civilization.
        Feb 26, 2022
      4. Lemonbarb
        Lemonbarb
        Don't forget diving into the ceasepit that is online image boards. They occasionally throw out gold in horror stories that are in some stretch, true.
        Sep 2, 2022
    28. Lemonbarb
      Lemonbarb
      Feb 25, 2022
      1. John_Oakman likes this.
    29. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      If it succeeds, it makes money. If it fails, it's a tax write off.
      Jan 22, 2022
      1. Lemonbarb likes this.
    30. John_Oakman
      John_Oakman
      AoE3 multiplayer is soaking up way too much of my free time...
      Jan 17, 2022
      1. Lemonbarb likes this.
      2. Lemonbarb
        Lemonbarb
        I know that feeling on the amount of time a really fun game can outright vampirise. I mean, look no further than the joy I had playing/whaling my time in Underrail, for instance. :)
        Feb 25, 2022
    Page 1 of 7
  • Loading...
  • Loading...

  • About

    Gender:
    Male
    My deviantart: https://www.deviantart.com/john-oakman
    (not that there's anything of note so far)

    Interact

    Content:

    Signature

    To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.
    -Ecclesiastes 3.1
    -------------------------------------------
    St. Truck-kun be with us protags! (SFW) (complete) OIL (SFW) (ongoing)