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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. rthomas2

    rthomas2 _

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    Brooks was responsible for disarming bombs. During the Battle of the Bulge. In no man’s land. Apparently the Germans began playing propaganda over their speakers, and he responded by setting up his own, playing Al Jolson songs.

    https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilear...urce=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

    Balls of steel, I think is the phrase.

    As for guesses: Beesley might count as a wax pun? Or Hindle, if that’s close enough in sound to Candle?
     
  2. LazySloth13

    LazySloth13 Versed in the lewd.

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    Paul did say he tell Dox that his/their Corp was going to be similar to the Green Lanterns but with 'blackjack and hookers' and one of those perks is listening to music while they fight the Reach, which maybe a result of the more creative recruits wanting to listen to something more exciting or with context they can understand.

    Man I wonder what that video game OST Paul commissioned would sound like, part orchestral part techno, especially the combat sequences.

    Plus I figured the reason why Dox isn't responding is because he's doing the Coluan equivalent of slamming his head into the nearest flat object, because despite his vast intellect he's been once again outdone by someone who relies upon metaphysical abilities to outpace the competition and made it difficult for people to take him seriously.
     
  3. Vaermina

    Vaermina Well worn.

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    You are assuming a lot while forgetting it's been two minutes real time since everything went down.

    Fact is there's no reason for Dox to assume that Paragon would, upon finding him busy for thirty seconds, decide to seize command.
     
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  4. Nervaqus987

    Nervaqus987 Well worn.

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    Two minutes real time is plenty of time when you're an 10th level intellect and have a power ring that massively boost your information processing speed.

    Hate to break it to you, but when military plan derails due to an unknown third party if you are in charge then you absolutely have to respond promptly when your subordinates request orders about what to do.

    Especially since he had multiple subordinates, both OL and the Legion Flag commander have attempted to contact him, both of whom were unable to reach him.
     
  5. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    I'm still convinced that Dox not answering is because Grayven is blocking communications.

    And if he has frozen up then it's due to Grayven using his god powers on him, like when Renegade made a bunch of lawyers lose confidence in their case, and not because he bacame afraid in his first military campaign.
     
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  6. Shotiegun11

    Shotiegun11 Know what you're doing yet?

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    Possible, except the SI has...heard? sensed?...every other bit of God Speech. Even when it was directed very far away from him at the ships and moon.

    If Grayven was using the it on Dox, who is relatively a LOT closer than those things, I think the SI would have noticed.
     
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  7. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Paragon isn't exactly an expert on god speech like renegade is, and has some small problems in fully hearing it, so Grayven may have just used it and he didn't hear it.
     
  8. Threadmarks: Over Reaching (part 11)
    Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    3rd July 2012
    10:23 GMT -5


    "Oh orange light, orange light
    Show us the sign!
    Your Lanterns have waited to see!
    The morning will come
    When the gal'xy's mine!"

    I Think Not.

    The space between us and the dreadnaught is obscured as the dreadnaught's main gun fires, a test of the strength of my desire for the fulfilment of my mission.

    A test of the strength of the mortal's desire for the fulfilment of his mission against my drive to conquer. Can he hear me, I wonder? Some mortals long accustomed to divine power can become aware of us, though I've yet to see one with any degree of true insight.

    I smile as I feel something other than the power of the main gun directed at me from the dreadnaught. Hello there.

    "Tomorrow belongs to me!"

    I pointedly turn away from the blazing fury raining down on my shield. The Lanterns I assigned to tow duty appear to have found a workable method for ducking the jamming. It's not exactly fast, but it's faster than light and that's fast enough. They should only need a few minutes.

    "Alright, let's try that again, but I expect you all to join in this time."

    Tomorrow belongs to ME, mortal, and all of the days thereafter.

    Yes, there's a New God over there, and they know who I am. But this is my Lantern Corps, and if they need a victory then I will ensure that they have one. My vision of the future won't be stopped by a demigod with a big… 'Ship'.

    My vision won't be stopped by a mortal with a glowing ring.

    "Oh orange light, orange light
    Show us the-!"

    No one's joining in.

    "Oh, come on. Most of your cultures have a concept of music! And the rest of you-"

    The dreadnaught accelerates, coming steadily closer.

    I Am Inevitable.

    It fires again, the ravening energies once more obscuring the wider universe on the other side of my barrier. Yes, yes, it's a very big gun. But these Lanterns are mine, and that's more important.

    This ship is mine. My capital. My throne. And it is of more significance than your cluster of mental defectives.

    "-can just chant it?"

    Most of the L.E.G.I.O.N. ships are nearing the edge of the jamming limit now, the Lanterns who moved fastest dumping their loads before flying back to aid the slower ones.

    "Oh orange light, orange light!"

    There's a reluctant muttering along from the Lanterns surrounding me, which is mildly frustrating as their shield is inside my shield and as such isn't actually getting shot at the moment. You'd think they could multitask well enough to sing.

    "Show us the sign!"

    With a little effort, I add an orange sigil wider than planet Earth to the inside of my shield.

    "Your Lanterns have waited to see!"

    I will show them their futures in a handful of ash.

    "The morning will come!"

    Now the dreadnaught's secondary batteries open fire as well, testing the outer parts of my shield. Yes, still strong there as well.

    "When the gal'xy's mine!"

    Slightly more Lanterns singing along now. Actually-. Ah, a proportion of those on tow duty have returned and joined in. I suppose that from a distance my shield is visible and the dreadnaught's own weaponsfire obscures it.

    "Tomorrow belongs to me!"

    Everyone who's still here sings a line, and inside my helmet I'm smiling broadly.

    Enough of this!

    The main gun shuts down, though the dreadnaught is still coming closer.

    "There, that wasn't so hard, was it? Upon my order, disengage in small groups and link up with the L.E.G.I.O.N. fleet. I'll tell you when."

    I begin sending orders direct to their rings, flecks of orange light across the emptiness of the outer system blurring as they head away. A hundred and twenty two Lanterns to a hundred and twelve. A hundred and one. Ninety, and the only reason I'm going this slowly is to make it completely clear to everyone that this is a controlled withdrawal.

    The dreadnaught slows to a relative stop, its bow almost touching my barrier. Generally speaking, if your super gun didn't work then ramming probably won't either. Why are they..?

    A small boom tube opens near the bow of the vessel and a single humanoid steps out, arms folded behind… His back. Big fellow. I guess this is the warchief that no one challenges. No one inside the clan challenges.

    "Remaining Lanterns may disengage on their own recognisance. Shield going down."

    Rather than simply dismiss it, I allow the construct to shrink inwards, until it's merely the size of the great orange sigil. Lanterns retreat, but nothing like as fast as they would be if they earnestly desired to flee. I think a few are actually loitering.

    "As much as I appreciate the offer of backup, the fleet does actually need you. Get moving. That is an order."

    And they're going. I float closer, making eye contact with the hulking figure acting as his ship's hood ornament. And I have no doubt that it is his; he has New God armour similar in general design to what the other New Gods of my acquaintance wear, though a little more sombre in tone. Dull gold and black, his face bare and a cascade of white hair drifting in the vacuum.

    I have no idea who this is. The face and grey-blue skin tone reminds me a little of Marvel's Thanos, but otherwise, I've got nothing. I didn't learn all that much about the backgrounds of the New Gods on Earth Prime because… Whatever the original idea was, when I was younger they were serving as minor Superman characters with grand-sounding names but little actual plot relevance.

    Of course, if Canis is anything to go by, he's not exactly going to be shy about telling me. So… Fully disengaged? Yes, just me left on our side, except perhaps for a few Lanterns who are really good at stealth. I make sure that I have eye contact and then lightly tap the shield from my side with the knuckles of my right hand as I allow it to evaporate.

    "Hello there! I'm the Illustres of the Orange Lantern Corps. Mind if I come aboard?"

    "You have my permission to stand before me."

    The voice is as deep as I'd expect for a chest of that volume, but also… Dusty? There's a mildly wheezing quality to it that I find a little odd. I suppose that could just be a result of talking in a vacuum; I'm not totally clear how he's managing that.

    I fly through space, over the bow of the ship and land a short distance ahead of him.

    "And whom do I have the pleasure of addressing?"

    "I am Grayven." "I am Conquest."
     
    Last edited: Dec 7, 2020
  9. TheLunarwolf

    TheLunarwolf Making the rounds.

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    Oh yay, actual Grayven.
     
  10. moralrelativity

    moralrelativity Recovering pendant.

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    Impressive strength and composure demonstrated by OL here. He seems to be understanding more of the god speech, and not being harmed by it. Grayven is curious and not going all out. It's going to be very interesting to see how this goes.
     
  11. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    maybe 'orders directly'

    Shouldn't his hair be black?

    Unless something happened to him.

    Abridged Red Tornado: Because magic you fucking potato.
     
  12. DAT_NOOB

    DAT_NOOB Accused of writing in a far away land

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    Irrelevant, at the very least once he is aware of the new fleet arriving he should begin giving orders and informing his subordinates that he is opening negotiations if you don't and just assume everyone will wait on you after seeing that kind of overwhelming power you get a mutiny.

    I don't know if you noticed but a massive unidentified fleet turned up out of nowhere belonging to a third unknown faction.

    Dox should at least inform his subordinates as to what he's doing before they panic and open fire/retreat/scuttle their ships in a disorganised mess.

    EDIT: It's a moot point know if Dox was negotiating then Grayven wouldn't bother with talking to OL.
     
  13. DrThoth

    DrThoth I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    I wonder if the title 'Over Reaching' will apply more to Paragon or to Grayven in this upcoming interaction. It might be the closest we get to a stand-off between Paragon and Renegade in the story.
     
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  14. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    For the Invisitext impaired.
    ;) Actual commentary soon!
     
  15. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Dox could have been taken out by Grayven's god powers.

    We know New Gods can do that, renegade did that to a bunch of lawyers who were working against him and used his powers to help Kon focus more on his schoolwork, so it wouldn't be odd if Grayven just mind whammied Dox to mess up the command structure of potential enemies.
     
  16. Ngamer11

    Ngamer11 Experienced.

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    I hope Paul will knowingly use Godspeech against Grayven, greatly surprising the New God of Conquest. I don't expect this to be easy for Paul, but neither do I expect this to be a curbstomp. It should be enough to demonstrate to Grayven that Paul isn't someone he can play around with, setting up further conflict in the future. Also, I hope that Grayven being a bigger part of the story, at least in the Paragon timeline, will encourage the fans of the story to call the Renegade!OL 'the Renegade' instead of 'Grayven', so as to avoid future confusion.
     
  17. DAT_NOOB

    DAT_NOOB Accused of writing in a far away land

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    Uhh... I was responding to a person suggesting that Dox might still be active but just busy negotiating with Grayven, and further suggesting that while Dox is negotiating he would have no reason to expect OL to take command.

    I'd expect Dox to expect OL to take command if he was incapacitated.
     
  18. BlueMangoAdea

    BlueMangoAdea Alive. For now.

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    Right. It's part of his duty as Illustres of the Orange Lantern Corps.
     
  19. Agent Orange

    Agent Orange Experienced.

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    Well this was hilarious :)
    Not quite a Cake Off but close enough.
    Two self-absorbed characters yelling at the universe that their toys are more important to them than they are to the other person and the universe just throwing its hands up and leaving the room in frustration.
     
  20. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
    [​IMG]
     
  21. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Is renegades hair colour also white now?
     
  22. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    I see Grayven-16 isn't in the mood to allow resistance to his Conquest... OL is going to have such a headache soon.

    And it appears the New God is as curious about OL's nascent ability to perceive Godspeech as we are. No doubt he plans to experiment...

    And OL's definitely beginning to pick up on it properly. I foresee him finally breaking through and being able to catch it clearly this episode, if not this segment...

    Ah, the greatest insult you can offer a prideful foe: Irrelevance. That's not going to make Grayven-16 any happier.

    So the Gordanian delegation definitely conveyed their impressions of him. Assuming Big G wasn't watching through their eyes anyway... And even OL can pick up on the clear overcompensation. Nice.

    So, making up the song as he goes, or subbing lyrics for another? In the finest bardic tradition, of course.

    Well, OL, they aren't quite as capable of working while being shit-scared. Unless you want to be able to build a wall out of bricks...

    You Are Also Annoying. Seriously, he's not even sure OL can hear him, and he's monologuing. The Ego on this God...

    ...Holy crap, Grayven-16 heard him thinking back? :eek: Holy shit, OL's Godspeech Tourette's pays off. And while that may make the Dreadnaught stronger while he empowers it, it'll also cost him more mojo if it gets damaged or even destroyed... After all, how worthy is a king of command, if his castle can be assaulted so easily?

    Jolly Cooperation! And a healthy amount of self-preservation, no doubt...

    Probably many of them are feeling sheepish at the idea of singing in battle. Those with such a martial tradition might join in happily, but many? It's probably not done.

    An added bit of insult. Oh, Grayven-16 must be fuming...

    Yep, he's getting annoyed. This is probably the most resistance anyone has shown, with or without his Godly mojo backing up the fleet...

    After all, why would one part be weaker than another, if it's all of one piece? It's not like it can suffer from manufacturing defects...

    I suspect nearby star systems are going to have quite the show in a few year's time.

    Finally, the sing-along's getting started. Though I bet some are just going along with the crazy-powerful crazy Boss Lantern.

    Looks like Grayven-16 wants to get this done up close and personal, then. A typically-Apokaliptian mistake, really. It basically says he doesn't trust his warriors to handle this themselves... Though I suppose you could make a case that he's doing this to protect them from a foe they could not overcome... But he's not that good a boss, as far as we know.

    Rather than a headlong retreat under the enemy's guns. Definitely better for morale.

    And he doesn't recognise him instantly because, after all, he's just a minor villain from an obscure run of Kyle Rayner's era...

    No doubt the more warrior-cultured, hoping to watch the Boss fight, if only to learn how Grayven-16 fights.

    ...White hair? That's a change. But then, Renegade is technically brown-haired. I wonder what diverged to cause that? Well, besides the obvious fact of 'that's how he looks in the show...'

    And, as I said, Grayven was a minor villain at the time, for Kyle Rayner of all people. In fact, I think he may well be better known to some of us readers from this story than from the actual comics, am I right? :D

    Heh. Politeness in the face of the Enemy. OL is really playing up his tip-top Britishness for this, isn't he? In the best Doctor tradition.

    Or an old, lingering injury? Or some quirk of his Godly nature. After all, If he sounds like this, imagine how Darkseid sounds... Though honestly, Micheal Ironsides will always be best Darkseid.

    Looks like OL will be doing the negotiating today. Hopefully Dox gets his head back on straight and sorts out a plan...

    Well. This is a meeting that's been some time coming. The only one more anticipated is Grayven-16r properly meeting the Renegade. But I doubt we'll be seeing that anytime soon... Unless it's already happened and I forgot it... :p Bless and curse long-running stories...
     
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2020
  23. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Huh. Haven't decided. The Renegade kind of remembers the black-haired comic Grayven, but his appearance was altered by Father Box who knew the white-haired version. I'm leaning towards dark hair to make it easier to visually distinguish them in this pure text story, but that isn't a firm decision.
     
  24. DrThoth

    DrThoth I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    I don't remember when Renegade saw Earth-16 Grayven for the first time, but I don't believe the latter had white hair then, unless it was edited later.
     
  25. Flightless Man

    Flightless Man Versed in the lewd.

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    What if Dox wanted Paragon removed as "collateral" damage he would have had no tie to. For all we know he told Grayven where Paul was going. It was very secret right? and Grayven arrives in the what 2 minutes the OL corp showed. For all we know he WANTs the Corp to be HIS
     
  26. Vaermina

    Vaermina Well worn.

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    So... Shouldn't Paragon be running about now? Cause last time he fought a New God he got his rings shut down and his ass spanked.
     
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  27. BlueMangoAdea

    BlueMangoAdea Alive. For now.

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    "I have no idea why this is working, but I am not stupid enough to argue against our Illustres."
     
  28. Ngamer11

    Ngamer11 Experienced.

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    Considering what happened, I wouldn't be surprised if he asked Canis for some pointers on how to stop that from happening again. Or at least, what to do to lessen the impact.
     
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  29. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    He may be trying to test out if Paul can hear him, or just trying to defeat his defences.

    Renegade did seem to lose some power after they got back from the future.

    To be fair, his warriors can't beat Paul.

    Maybe as his godhood developed his hair changed.

    Yep, this story is the first time I've ever heard of this guy.

    And don't dis Kyle, he's one of the strongest Lanterns in existence.

    And to be fair even Darkseid has sometimes just been a monster of the week type villain rather than the dreaded conqueror of worlds he's portrayed as.

    I think renegade met Grayven 16 and they fought, but it was a really weird chapter.

    It was after renegade went to Vega and it was in a paragon focused episode.
     
  30. BlueMangoAdea

    BlueMangoAdea Alive. For now.

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    Speaking of New Gods, I wonder what happened to Aurakos.
     
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