2.12 Ugly Truths
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Naron
I trust you know where the happy button is?
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The Rounds left them with a lot of trouble. Even ignoring the sudden and very real prospect of marriage, Nunnally and Lelouch had to explain Geass to Kallen and Jeremiah.
He took the reason for why he acted as he did during the Orange incident with relief. She was the opposite.
Aside from when she got agitated, Kallen was deceptively smart. She quickly realised how suspicious it was that the Black Knights followed their big plan without a fuss. There was not a single deserter, not a single voice to disagree from even the former hardliners. It was too perfect and they all knew it. Lelouch did not even bother trying to hide it.
The fact Kallen herself joined voluntarily did not make it any better.
Now they were bereft of a redhead, who stomped off and slammed the door.
"Well," Nunnally mused, looking around. "That could have been worse?"
Kaguya just sighed in response, though Lelouch inclined his head in agreement. C.C. showed no reaction whatsoever, having listened to the brewing argument with veiled interest.
None of them answered her, but Jeremiah did: "Dame Stadtfeldt is still young and full of fire. But as she has shown with her swift deductions, she is also smart enough to understand that she loses everything if she breaks ties with you now."
While Nunnally agreed with his assessment, she was still worried. Lelouch took the words right out of her mouth: "But she's emotional at the moment, which is not conductive for making the prudent choice."
Even Jeremiah did not refute that point. C.C. grinned at the side, the most aware of them all that Lelouch spoke from experience.
"Then I shall watch over her for the time being," Sayoko announced. She was the only member of staff they allowed into the room, now she gave a faint bow and took her leave.
This left only five people. Nunnally, Lelouch, Jeremiah, Kaguya, and C.C.. The Code bearer kept quiet during the Geass 101, now she watched them curiously, since caught on that the meeting was not over yet. Nunnally turned her way now, a little wary of having to ask but knowing that she must.
"Is it true? That you can only die by passing this 'Code' onto someone else?"
There was no surprise. No reaction whatsoever, in fact. C.C. met her gaze evenly, even though Nunnally tried to convey her desire to know the truth. She slowly began to comprehend just how ancient the other woman must be. With it came a startling realisation: C.C.'s eyes held so little luster. Sometimes they flashed with humour, but more often than not she seemed almost empty.
"It is," C.C. confirmed, for once without any obfuscation. "The Code is passed from one owner to the next across time, nestled within a fully developed Geass. No power in this world can cause a lasting death for as long as one carries it."
She sounded bored, as if reciting from a textbook she did not care to read properly.
It felt wrong.
"And that's why you gave Geass to Lelouch?" Nunnally tried.
C.C. nodded. "And yourself, girl," she reminded, her blank look fading in favour of some light amusement. "One of you will one day take my Code, so that I can finally die. That is our contract, that is my wish."
The cheerful way she spoke of her own approaching death made Nunnally shudder. Kaguya seemed to feel just as lost, going by how she leaned forward in obvious concern and piped up.
"But why do you want to die so bad? Is this Code making you want to?"
"It's your youth speaking there, girl," C.C. explained with a tired smile, almost indulgent. "I was born long before Oda and Tokugawa. Ages passed me by while I stayed young, but the mind can not stop aging. I am tired of this unending live, much like one who has not slept four days yearns to rest their head on a soft pillow."
Then she reached out and rubbed Kaguya's head. No more was said, the affectionate gesture giving the teen pause. She did not resist, too confused to do so.
Nunnally was uncertain what to say, too. Or if she should say anything at all. She could not understand a desire like that, she wanted to live more than anything all her life. Lelouch seemed equally stumped, probably for the same reason as her. How could they comprehend a woman who was more than fifty times their age?
In the end it was Kaguya who responded. Slowly, hesitantly, but curious: "You met Oda and Tokugawa?"
C.C. let up in her affection with a huff, leaning back into the chair she took. "No, the first time I entered Japan was recent. The world is a big place, and it was even more so before the advent of cars, trains, and airplanes."
Kaguya nodded, now disappointed. C.C. seemed willing to indulge the one question, but Nunnally felt she would quickly get bored if they kept asking about history. But they had confirmation that Anya knew what she was talking about. That she knew the assassin's identity, too.
But at the same time, there was another question on Nunnally's mind: "When is a Geass fully developed, C.C.? How can we tell that they stopped growing stronger?"
"It expands to both eyes," C.C. told her idly, as if it was the easiest thing in the world. She tapped her closed eyelid for emphasis.
"And you had one, too?"
"Yes."
She was about to inquire further, but realised in time that C.C. did not want to talk about it. So Nunnally dropped the subject with a sigh before slumping in her chair.
"So Dame Alstreim means business," she changed the subject. "How did she even find out about this?"
It was an open question, but she hoped C.C. would give more insight. Unfortunately, the immortal kept her silence.
"She is a duchess and Knight of Six," Lelouch suggested. "It's possible that the Empire knows of Geass, at least in the abstract. If this is true, then we need to be more careful with the original plan."
He glanced to C.C. for confirmation, only to get stonewalled with an impish grin. After rolling his eyes, Lelouch returned to the subject at hand: "She must have learned about it from somewhere, else she couldn't have spotted my Geass. That aside, we need to think about how to respond to her demand."
"There is some time, your highness," Jeremiah mused with an idle motion. "Dame Alstreim has yet to see her fifteenth birthday. A noble lady is not supposed to marry before sixteen at the earliest. Although the peerage will expect to see an heir shortly after, so eighteen should be more advisable if you were to accept her offer."
Four years, then. They technically had that long to think, but any day they did not make a decision was one further day they did not know who took their mother away.
"So we need to wait two years before anything happens either way?" Kaguya asked, slightly confused. Nunnally wondered about the logistics as well, so she glanced back to her knight, who explained with only the slightest bit of hesitation.
"Not exactly, Lady Sumeragi. The practice of betrothals in childhood has fallen out of favour over the last century, but it is very much alive for teens. They are not ironclad, but breaking one once announced without due reason is a certain way to destroy one's reputation. If his highness wished to accept and announce as such tomorrow, I believe that would satisfy Dame Alstreim's demand."
While Kaguya nodded her understanding, Nunnally tried not to let her distaste show. She did not want Lelouch to get engaged, especially not against his will. Even if it was supposedly his choice, Anya practically twisted his arm. This was the very thing they wanted to prevent.
"Is there another way to figure out who did it?" she asked the room, only to be answered with silence.
Her gaze passed from an uncertain Kaguya to Lelouch, who seemed deep in thought. Then to Jeremiah, who squirmed uncomfortably. He clearly did not like being asked this sort of question, recognising the volatile subject for what it was.
Once he had her attention however, he explained haltingly: "I, well, I do not believe there is. As you know, any investigation was cancelled by his majesty's decree. His majesty may know the assailant's identity, but I doubt you would rather ask him."
The blank face he got in response told him all he needed to know. Nunnally was quietly disgusted with the mere idea of crawling to that man for anything. Even marrying someone off was less infuriating than that.
"In that case your only option is Dame Alstreim," Jeremiah noted. "If she truly was a witness that day, then she is the only one."
But just because it was the lesser evil did not mean that Nunnally liked it the slightest bit. She glowered in response and leaned back in her chair. Looking to Lelouch again and finding him still so deep in thought made her suspicious, though.
"You aren't seriously considering this?"
All attention went to her brother now, whose gaze slowly found hers. "It bears consideration, is all," Lelouch explained softly. "Is knowing the perpetrator worth marrying her over?"
"We came back like this specifically so we won't get married off against our will!"
Her voice rose in volume, but Lelouch bore the indignation with almost unnatural calm. "I know," he agreed. "But this is still a choice, I'm not forced to do it."
"I don't want you to," Nunnally shot back, still unhappy. Lelouch showed her the faintest smile in turn and did not argue, but she knew that did not mean he agreed.
Then Jeremiah chimed in again, much to her dismay: "May I inquire what the issue with this matter is, exactly?"
Her unamused look was weathered without issue. Whatever her expression told him, he decided to elaborate.
"I understand that your values differ from those raised in noble environments. However, you chose to return into the fold. Even if you planned to reject all convention eventually, you must first know and accept the current rules. Each of your hands in marriage is another bargaining chip that you currently hold, of which there are precious few. Refusing such a powerful tool on principle may well cause severe problems down the line."
He spoke reasonable and made sense. It made Nunnally gnash her teeth all the more. She did not interrupt because she could see his wisdom, even if she hated it.
A hand gently landed on her shoulder, reminding of Kaguya's presence. Her friend did not try comfort her beyond just being there, though. Now was not the time and they both knew it.
Meanwhile, Lelouch continued to mull over the situation. Some time passed like this before he addressed Jeremiah.
"What are your thoughts on Dame Alstreim, especially as a match?"
The older man considering it, but he did not need long to start laying out his thoughts.
"Age-wise, wedding Dame Alstreim as soon as possible would be a minor scandal, though not problematic. The right framing would even allow to earn some positive attention if your highness were to take my advice and wait until she is of age. The girl herself is of a stock where nobody will question the match; if memory serves, her family splits from the royal line three generations back. She is, however, the last member of the main line. I must admit that I am unaware of the reasons behind her parents' passing."
He left a pause there to let them digest the information. Nunnally actively had to stop herself from sympathising; being an orphan did not excuse forcing a choice like this on them. Whatever her final goal with this was, Nunnally wanted nothing of it.
"Outside of that," Jeremiah continued laying it out, "she has not given any public indicators of her political leanings yet. The lesser nobility affiliated with her would become allied and follow your highness's stance out of obligation. Although she has no great amount of allies at court, neither does she have enemies. Overall, I would deem her a safe choice for a match. Wedding Dame Alstreim will guarantee your highness a stable foundation to build a strong political front from, assuming that is your desire."
Where Nunnally was still quietly annoyed, Lelouch had soaked up every word. She could tell he did, and she liked this entire situation even less because even she could see how advantageous this was for them. Anya must know it too, or at least Gino.
The short of it was that this offer was too good to refuse.
"I understand," Lelouch said, still thoughtful. "She will know at least most of what you told us, too. No fool would become Knight of Six at fourteen."
"What is she after?" Nunnally asked, not that she expected an answer. It was important to keep this in mind, that everyone wanted something in this damned country. Yet she failed to make her brother stop thinking about it.
While their conversation petered out, Kallen hid in one of the guest rooms to brood.
She should have known there was something off. It all went too smoothly, too easily. Swaying so many people to do something they should by all means be opposed to; she even thought something stunk about it at first, but got carried along by the wave. And how should she have guessed something like this? Psychic powers that affected the mind, perfect control over people even.
Lelouch up and admitted he used it on her before, even!
But what was she supposed to do about it? What could she do, anyway?
Her thoughts kept circling around those two questions. Nobody would believe her if she spilled the secret, then she would be silenced. Staying quiet somehow felt worse; it made her an accessory in this madness, more so than she already was.
Ohgi would believe her, she was sure of that much. But what could he alone do here? And what if he was under Geass? Could he even take her side anymore?
A soft knock on wood dispersed the morbid thoughts somewhat. Kallen turned to glare at whoever disturbed her, but it became even more venomous when she spotted Sayoko of all people.
"Get lost," she bit out.
Yet contrary to her hissed order, the maid stepped into the room and closed the door behind her.
"I believe neither of us is helped by your shutting people out, Kozuki-san," she told her gently. Her words were as even as ever, perhaps kind. But right now the nerve to use her actual name like this pissed Kallen off even more.
"I'm not talking to a traitor," she snapped. "Working for Britannians like some dog for a treat, don't you have any pride?"
She wanted to hurt the other woman, but her words just seemed to roll off of Sayoko.
"Are you a traitor to your people for being raised in a Britannian household after the invasion?" she asked back. The polite rebuttal hit harder than Kallen liked, her wordless glower enough of an answer. Sayoko smiled kindly.
"Glass houses, Kozuki-san."
Kallen gnashed her teeth and stood in response; she was not tall enough to tower over Sayoko, but definitely tall enough to loom.
"You have no idea what you're talking about," she hissed.
"Then explain to me."
Be it the reminder that she was half while Sayoko was pure Japanese. Be it that unflinching smile in the face of Kallen's anger. Be it even that she was a maid who spoke out against her. Kallen was sick of it, she just wanted to mess her up.
So she swung her fist, fully intent on dealing at least a bloody nose to the bitch.
Sayoko took a single, almost airy step to the side. Kallen's swing went wide, but she did not even comprehend it happening until her arm was grasped firmly. She was swung around with force she could not match, any attempt to fight back failed. Those hands around her arm and shoulder were like iron vices, implacable.
Before she knew it, Kallen was painfully pressed against the wall. Her right arm was behind her back, pulled up to the point of pain. She squirmed in place, but Sayoko turned from a gentle wave into a mountain.
"I don't want to hurt you, Kozuki-san," she spoke almost right into her ear, voice firmer now. "But I won't let go unless you promise not to try that again."
Kallen's thoughts went to the sword strapped to her hip. Then the gun in its holster. If she could get her weapon, maybe there was a chance.
But then what?
Even if she could fight Sayoko off, what would happen after? It was not like she could fight her way out of this when Nunnally could just make her unable to fight. Or when C.C. just did not die.
Kallen fell slack, all the fight leaving her. She wanted to resist more, but what was the point? She already tied herself to this plan, knowingly or not. The only power she had was what crumbs Lelouch and Nunnally gave her; she could change nothing unless she went and killed them. But despite everything, the thought of doing that made her shudder.
Despite what she said before, Sayoko let go. She did not demand that promise, but neither did Kallen consider hitting her again. She slowly removed herself from the wall, absently rubbing her cheek.
The maid tugged at her other hand, sitting her down on the bed. Then she settled right next to Kallen, spending comfort in silence. The hands holding hers were warm and calloused, almost like her mother's.
She did not have the energy to glare anymore, now she was just depressed.
"Big brother didn't die for this," Kallen muttered.
The words came softly, she did not even realise she fell back on Japanese until after. Sayoko gently squeezed her hand by way of response, coaxing Kallen to keep talking: "Joining Britannia, supporting a prince, mind control. I just know he'd be disgusted with all of us. What were we thinking? No, what was I thinking? Ohgi-san's probably...."
She did not even manage to say it out loud. The futility of her own position crashed over her anew, driving tears to Kallen's eyes. She was already bound to them in any way that mattered.
Sayoko did not respond in words. Rather, Kallen was pulled forward with utmost gentleness, then enveloped her in a warm embrace. She was held against the older woman's chest while Sayoko petted her head.
It was a near thing not to break into a crying mess, but she could not stop the words from blubbering out: "M-Mom's in hospital, my brother's dead, and my friends are mind controlled. What do I do?"
The older woman hummed in response, her ministrations never ceasing. Kallen knew she would get no help from her, but there was nobody else left to ask.
Yet she did speak, answering in the same Japanese Kallen used thus far.
"You're scared for your lack of power over your own circumstances, not to mention those of people you care about. There is nothing wrong with that. Adrift at sea with no safe haven in sight, at the mercy of the ocean's waves."
She said it almost soothingly, prompting Kallen to nod against her chest.
"We have all felt that way sometime or other, Kallen. I wish I could give you a proper answer, but none of us found it yet. All you can do is endure, see how to stack the deck in your favour as time goes on. Both of them have done the same ever since they were cast away from the royal family."
"This isn't the same and you know it," Kallen muttered, barely managing not to cry for real.
"Is it not?" Sayoko asked back. She started gently scratching Kallen's scalp, making the younger woman relax against her almost involuntarily. Her voice remained soothing and soft.
"I was taught to fight since I could walk. Yet I find a strength I will never have in my young mistress. Nunnally was forced to depend on others for seven long years. She still depends on us even now. The only thing she could do was to have faith in the goodness of people, yet she kept on smiling. And it is my firm belief that I can put the same faith in her."
"It's scary to yield control, Kallen. I know. But is it so bad a thing to trust?"
The worst part that she was not even wrong. Kallen wanted to trust. She wanted to believe that everything would work out. She trusted Naoto and Ohgi. But she just could not bring herself to do it now.
"Mind control," she reiterated the big problem.
"Which affects neither you nor Ohgi-san," Sayoko countered. "You didn't remain long enough to even ask."
The way she said it gave Kallen pause. Once she looked up at the genially smiling maid, Sayoko elaborated for her: "Ohgi-san and Tohdoh-san both agreed to this of their own volition. The same is true of Sumeragi-san. The ones master Lelouch had to force were the radicals among the freedom fighters. Though I wonder some days if this is not kinder, even if it violates their free will. Their lives are saved and used for a greater purpose after all, to obtain the very thing they're ready to lay it down for."
At first she felt disbelief, but by the end Kallen had to snort. "I can tell propaganda when I hear it," she snarked half-heartedly.
Sayoko grinned back. "Worth a try."
After saying that, she went back to petting her head and Kallen melted back into her ministrations. The tension bled out of her now.
"I'm biased because I served faithfully for many years," Sayoko admitted. "I will follow them wherever they go, regardless the danger or dishonour. Some have called me a traitor, others questioned my lack of pride. But their words mean nothing to me, Kallen. I could not be more proud to have found a master worth following to hell and back. Even if you disagree, I only ask you to try seeing what I see. Give them a chance to do right by you and yours."
At her heart of hearts, Kallen liked the way Sayoko outlined it. It did not sound so bad, even if it was still scary. Even if Kallen was still wary. At the same time, she knew that none of what she was told could be backed with proof.
All she knew was that she was not under Geass. If she were, she could not even consider refusing.
And despite it all, she did want to believe them. Lelouch and Nunnally both.
"Not like I have a choice," she finally said, failing to even grouse. She was already in the thick of it, there was no backing out. The only way past was through.
Another huff came from Sayoko, this one more felt than heard. "Such is life," she mused. "We can only hold onto something stable and wait out the storm."
Kallen accepted her wisdom with a slow nod and pulled back. Sayoko let go without a fuss, allowing her to stretch.
"And that was a weird posture to be in."
"You're a bit too big to sit on my lap," Sayoko teased kindly. "Not to mention that this would appear inappropriate."
The joke startled a laugh out of Kallen, who still felt oddly comfortable. "What, do you do that with Lelouch?"
Whether she noticed the attempt to snark or not, Sayoko's response was earnest all the same: "I used to when he was younger. He complained more, though."
"Hah. Boys."
"Quite."
A short pause followed, during which she clasped Kallen's hands again. "But if you need someone to lend an ear or spend comfort, do not hesitate to call on me, Kallen."
She just nodded, still overwhelmed by the sheer kindness heaped on her. Kallen barely did not duck her head under it.
"What's with the lack of honorifics?" she mumbled, which caused Sayoko's smile to widen a fraction.
"Spending comfort somewhat contradicts being respectful. But you're right, Kozuki-san. Now let me see to your face, then I will find you some ice cream."
She just sat there and let Sayoko clean up her lightly muddled makeup. Getting out of that woman's fussing felt all but impossible, she just had that sort of energy about her. Something motherly.
And somehow, Kallen could not find it in herself to be mad anymore.
Sayoko was right. She was in a bad spot right now, but better opportunities would come eventually. For now, Kallen could just bide her time and see what happened. And maybe, just maybe, Lelouch and Nunnally would do the right thing after all.
The pair passed by C.C., who was now lounging around in the hallway. The immortal woman's gaze followed them for a moment, though neither noticed her pleased smile.
"Some days I wonder how these children do it," she mused out loud. "Then again, all of history is riddled with oddities like them. But what game are you playing now?"
The servants near enough to hear thought her to be talking to herself. In fact, she did. But nobody wondered who it was she addressed, even if her question would not be heard. None noticed that her gaze rested on a painting of Empress Marianne.
He took the reason for why he acted as he did during the Orange incident with relief. She was the opposite.
Aside from when she got agitated, Kallen was deceptively smart. She quickly realised how suspicious it was that the Black Knights followed their big plan without a fuss. There was not a single deserter, not a single voice to disagree from even the former hardliners. It was too perfect and they all knew it. Lelouch did not even bother trying to hide it.
The fact Kallen herself joined voluntarily did not make it any better.
Now they were bereft of a redhead, who stomped off and slammed the door.
"Well," Nunnally mused, looking around. "That could have been worse?"
Kaguya just sighed in response, though Lelouch inclined his head in agreement. C.C. showed no reaction whatsoever, having listened to the brewing argument with veiled interest.
None of them answered her, but Jeremiah did: "Dame Stadtfeldt is still young and full of fire. But as she has shown with her swift deductions, she is also smart enough to understand that she loses everything if she breaks ties with you now."
While Nunnally agreed with his assessment, she was still worried. Lelouch took the words right out of her mouth: "But she's emotional at the moment, which is not conductive for making the prudent choice."
Even Jeremiah did not refute that point. C.C. grinned at the side, the most aware of them all that Lelouch spoke from experience.
"Then I shall watch over her for the time being," Sayoko announced. She was the only member of staff they allowed into the room, now she gave a faint bow and took her leave.
This left only five people. Nunnally, Lelouch, Jeremiah, Kaguya, and C.C.. The Code bearer kept quiet during the Geass 101, now she watched them curiously, since caught on that the meeting was not over yet. Nunnally turned her way now, a little wary of having to ask but knowing that she must.
"Is it true? That you can only die by passing this 'Code' onto someone else?"
There was no surprise. No reaction whatsoever, in fact. C.C. met her gaze evenly, even though Nunnally tried to convey her desire to know the truth. She slowly began to comprehend just how ancient the other woman must be. With it came a startling realisation: C.C.'s eyes held so little luster. Sometimes they flashed with humour, but more often than not she seemed almost empty.
"It is," C.C. confirmed, for once without any obfuscation. "The Code is passed from one owner to the next across time, nestled within a fully developed Geass. No power in this world can cause a lasting death for as long as one carries it."
She sounded bored, as if reciting from a textbook she did not care to read properly.
It felt wrong.
"And that's why you gave Geass to Lelouch?" Nunnally tried.
C.C. nodded. "And yourself, girl," she reminded, her blank look fading in favour of some light amusement. "One of you will one day take my Code, so that I can finally die. That is our contract, that is my wish."
The cheerful way she spoke of her own approaching death made Nunnally shudder. Kaguya seemed to feel just as lost, going by how she leaned forward in obvious concern and piped up.
"But why do you want to die so bad? Is this Code making you want to?"
"It's your youth speaking there, girl," C.C. explained with a tired smile, almost indulgent. "I was born long before Oda and Tokugawa. Ages passed me by while I stayed young, but the mind can not stop aging. I am tired of this unending live, much like one who has not slept four days yearns to rest their head on a soft pillow."
Then she reached out and rubbed Kaguya's head. No more was said, the affectionate gesture giving the teen pause. She did not resist, too confused to do so.
Nunnally was uncertain what to say, too. Or if she should say anything at all. She could not understand a desire like that, she wanted to live more than anything all her life. Lelouch seemed equally stumped, probably for the same reason as her. How could they comprehend a woman who was more than fifty times their age?
In the end it was Kaguya who responded. Slowly, hesitantly, but curious: "You met Oda and Tokugawa?"
C.C. let up in her affection with a huff, leaning back into the chair she took. "No, the first time I entered Japan was recent. The world is a big place, and it was even more so before the advent of cars, trains, and airplanes."
Kaguya nodded, now disappointed. C.C. seemed willing to indulge the one question, but Nunnally felt she would quickly get bored if they kept asking about history. But they had confirmation that Anya knew what she was talking about. That she knew the assassin's identity, too.
But at the same time, there was another question on Nunnally's mind: "When is a Geass fully developed, C.C.? How can we tell that they stopped growing stronger?"
"It expands to both eyes," C.C. told her idly, as if it was the easiest thing in the world. She tapped her closed eyelid for emphasis.
"And you had one, too?"
"Yes."
She was about to inquire further, but realised in time that C.C. did not want to talk about it. So Nunnally dropped the subject with a sigh before slumping in her chair.
"So Dame Alstreim means business," she changed the subject. "How did she even find out about this?"
It was an open question, but she hoped C.C. would give more insight. Unfortunately, the immortal kept her silence.
"She is a duchess and Knight of Six," Lelouch suggested. "It's possible that the Empire knows of Geass, at least in the abstract. If this is true, then we need to be more careful with the original plan."
He glanced to C.C. for confirmation, only to get stonewalled with an impish grin. After rolling his eyes, Lelouch returned to the subject at hand: "She must have learned about it from somewhere, else she couldn't have spotted my Geass. That aside, we need to think about how to respond to her demand."
"There is some time, your highness," Jeremiah mused with an idle motion. "Dame Alstreim has yet to see her fifteenth birthday. A noble lady is not supposed to marry before sixteen at the earliest. Although the peerage will expect to see an heir shortly after, so eighteen should be more advisable if you were to accept her offer."
Four years, then. They technically had that long to think, but any day they did not make a decision was one further day they did not know who took their mother away.
"So we need to wait two years before anything happens either way?" Kaguya asked, slightly confused. Nunnally wondered about the logistics as well, so she glanced back to her knight, who explained with only the slightest bit of hesitation.
"Not exactly, Lady Sumeragi. The practice of betrothals in childhood has fallen out of favour over the last century, but it is very much alive for teens. They are not ironclad, but breaking one once announced without due reason is a certain way to destroy one's reputation. If his highness wished to accept and announce as such tomorrow, I believe that would satisfy Dame Alstreim's demand."
While Kaguya nodded her understanding, Nunnally tried not to let her distaste show. She did not want Lelouch to get engaged, especially not against his will. Even if it was supposedly his choice, Anya practically twisted his arm. This was the very thing they wanted to prevent.
"Is there another way to figure out who did it?" she asked the room, only to be answered with silence.
Her gaze passed from an uncertain Kaguya to Lelouch, who seemed deep in thought. Then to Jeremiah, who squirmed uncomfortably. He clearly did not like being asked this sort of question, recognising the volatile subject for what it was.
Once he had her attention however, he explained haltingly: "I, well, I do not believe there is. As you know, any investigation was cancelled by his majesty's decree. His majesty may know the assailant's identity, but I doubt you would rather ask him."
The blank face he got in response told him all he needed to know. Nunnally was quietly disgusted with the mere idea of crawling to that man for anything. Even marrying someone off was less infuriating than that.
"In that case your only option is Dame Alstreim," Jeremiah noted. "If she truly was a witness that day, then she is the only one."
But just because it was the lesser evil did not mean that Nunnally liked it the slightest bit. She glowered in response and leaned back in her chair. Looking to Lelouch again and finding him still so deep in thought made her suspicious, though.
"You aren't seriously considering this?"
All attention went to her brother now, whose gaze slowly found hers. "It bears consideration, is all," Lelouch explained softly. "Is knowing the perpetrator worth marrying her over?"
"We came back like this specifically so we won't get married off against our will!"
Her voice rose in volume, but Lelouch bore the indignation with almost unnatural calm. "I know," he agreed. "But this is still a choice, I'm not forced to do it."
"I don't want you to," Nunnally shot back, still unhappy. Lelouch showed her the faintest smile in turn and did not argue, but she knew that did not mean he agreed.
Then Jeremiah chimed in again, much to her dismay: "May I inquire what the issue with this matter is, exactly?"
Her unamused look was weathered without issue. Whatever her expression told him, he decided to elaborate.
"I understand that your values differ from those raised in noble environments. However, you chose to return into the fold. Even if you planned to reject all convention eventually, you must first know and accept the current rules. Each of your hands in marriage is another bargaining chip that you currently hold, of which there are precious few. Refusing such a powerful tool on principle may well cause severe problems down the line."
He spoke reasonable and made sense. It made Nunnally gnash her teeth all the more. She did not interrupt because she could see his wisdom, even if she hated it.
A hand gently landed on her shoulder, reminding of Kaguya's presence. Her friend did not try comfort her beyond just being there, though. Now was not the time and they both knew it.
Meanwhile, Lelouch continued to mull over the situation. Some time passed like this before he addressed Jeremiah.
"What are your thoughts on Dame Alstreim, especially as a match?"
The older man considering it, but he did not need long to start laying out his thoughts.
"Age-wise, wedding Dame Alstreim as soon as possible would be a minor scandal, though not problematic. The right framing would even allow to earn some positive attention if your highness were to take my advice and wait until she is of age. The girl herself is of a stock where nobody will question the match; if memory serves, her family splits from the royal line three generations back. She is, however, the last member of the main line. I must admit that I am unaware of the reasons behind her parents' passing."
He left a pause there to let them digest the information. Nunnally actively had to stop herself from sympathising; being an orphan did not excuse forcing a choice like this on them. Whatever her final goal with this was, Nunnally wanted nothing of it.
"Outside of that," Jeremiah continued laying it out, "she has not given any public indicators of her political leanings yet. The lesser nobility affiliated with her would become allied and follow your highness's stance out of obligation. Although she has no great amount of allies at court, neither does she have enemies. Overall, I would deem her a safe choice for a match. Wedding Dame Alstreim will guarantee your highness a stable foundation to build a strong political front from, assuming that is your desire."
Where Nunnally was still quietly annoyed, Lelouch had soaked up every word. She could tell he did, and she liked this entire situation even less because even she could see how advantageous this was for them. Anya must know it too, or at least Gino.
The short of it was that this offer was too good to refuse.
"I understand," Lelouch said, still thoughtful. "She will know at least most of what you told us, too. No fool would become Knight of Six at fourteen."
"What is she after?" Nunnally asked, not that she expected an answer. It was important to keep this in mind, that everyone wanted something in this damned country. Yet she failed to make her brother stop thinking about it.
While their conversation petered out, Kallen hid in one of the guest rooms to brood.
She should have known there was something off. It all went too smoothly, too easily. Swaying so many people to do something they should by all means be opposed to; she even thought something stunk about it at first, but got carried along by the wave. And how should she have guessed something like this? Psychic powers that affected the mind, perfect control over people even.
Lelouch up and admitted he used it on her before, even!
But what was she supposed to do about it? What could she do, anyway?
Her thoughts kept circling around those two questions. Nobody would believe her if she spilled the secret, then she would be silenced. Staying quiet somehow felt worse; it made her an accessory in this madness, more so than she already was.
Ohgi would believe her, she was sure of that much. But what could he alone do here? And what if he was under Geass? Could he even take her side anymore?
A soft knock on wood dispersed the morbid thoughts somewhat. Kallen turned to glare at whoever disturbed her, but it became even more venomous when she spotted Sayoko of all people.
"Get lost," she bit out.
Yet contrary to her hissed order, the maid stepped into the room and closed the door behind her.
"I believe neither of us is helped by your shutting people out, Kozuki-san," she told her gently. Her words were as even as ever, perhaps kind. But right now the nerve to use her actual name like this pissed Kallen off even more.
"I'm not talking to a traitor," she snapped. "Working for Britannians like some dog for a treat, don't you have any pride?"
She wanted to hurt the other woman, but her words just seemed to roll off of Sayoko.
"Are you a traitor to your people for being raised in a Britannian household after the invasion?" she asked back. The polite rebuttal hit harder than Kallen liked, her wordless glower enough of an answer. Sayoko smiled kindly.
"Glass houses, Kozuki-san."
Kallen gnashed her teeth and stood in response; she was not tall enough to tower over Sayoko, but definitely tall enough to loom.
"You have no idea what you're talking about," she hissed.
"Then explain to me."
Be it the reminder that she was half while Sayoko was pure Japanese. Be it that unflinching smile in the face of Kallen's anger. Be it even that she was a maid who spoke out against her. Kallen was sick of it, she just wanted to mess her up.
So she swung her fist, fully intent on dealing at least a bloody nose to the bitch.
Sayoko took a single, almost airy step to the side. Kallen's swing went wide, but she did not even comprehend it happening until her arm was grasped firmly. She was swung around with force she could not match, any attempt to fight back failed. Those hands around her arm and shoulder were like iron vices, implacable.
Before she knew it, Kallen was painfully pressed against the wall. Her right arm was behind her back, pulled up to the point of pain. She squirmed in place, but Sayoko turned from a gentle wave into a mountain.
"I don't want to hurt you, Kozuki-san," she spoke almost right into her ear, voice firmer now. "But I won't let go unless you promise not to try that again."
Kallen's thoughts went to the sword strapped to her hip. Then the gun in its holster. If she could get her weapon, maybe there was a chance.
But then what?
Even if she could fight Sayoko off, what would happen after? It was not like she could fight her way out of this when Nunnally could just make her unable to fight. Or when C.C. just did not die.
Kallen fell slack, all the fight leaving her. She wanted to resist more, but what was the point? She already tied herself to this plan, knowingly or not. The only power she had was what crumbs Lelouch and Nunnally gave her; she could change nothing unless she went and killed them. But despite everything, the thought of doing that made her shudder.
Despite what she said before, Sayoko let go. She did not demand that promise, but neither did Kallen consider hitting her again. She slowly removed herself from the wall, absently rubbing her cheek.
The maid tugged at her other hand, sitting her down on the bed. Then she settled right next to Kallen, spending comfort in silence. The hands holding hers were warm and calloused, almost like her mother's.
She did not have the energy to glare anymore, now she was just depressed.
"Big brother didn't die for this," Kallen muttered.
The words came softly, she did not even realise she fell back on Japanese until after. Sayoko gently squeezed her hand by way of response, coaxing Kallen to keep talking: "Joining Britannia, supporting a prince, mind control. I just know he'd be disgusted with all of us. What were we thinking? No, what was I thinking? Ohgi-san's probably...."
She did not even manage to say it out loud. The futility of her own position crashed over her anew, driving tears to Kallen's eyes. She was already bound to them in any way that mattered.
Sayoko did not respond in words. Rather, Kallen was pulled forward with utmost gentleness, then enveloped her in a warm embrace. She was held against the older woman's chest while Sayoko petted her head.
It was a near thing not to break into a crying mess, but she could not stop the words from blubbering out: "M-Mom's in hospital, my brother's dead, and my friends are mind controlled. What do I do?"
The older woman hummed in response, her ministrations never ceasing. Kallen knew she would get no help from her, but there was nobody else left to ask.
Yet she did speak, answering in the same Japanese Kallen used thus far.
"You're scared for your lack of power over your own circumstances, not to mention those of people you care about. There is nothing wrong with that. Adrift at sea with no safe haven in sight, at the mercy of the ocean's waves."
She said it almost soothingly, prompting Kallen to nod against her chest.
"We have all felt that way sometime or other, Kallen. I wish I could give you a proper answer, but none of us found it yet. All you can do is endure, see how to stack the deck in your favour as time goes on. Both of them have done the same ever since they were cast away from the royal family."
"This isn't the same and you know it," Kallen muttered, barely managing not to cry for real.
"Is it not?" Sayoko asked back. She started gently scratching Kallen's scalp, making the younger woman relax against her almost involuntarily. Her voice remained soothing and soft.
"I was taught to fight since I could walk. Yet I find a strength I will never have in my young mistress. Nunnally was forced to depend on others for seven long years. She still depends on us even now. The only thing she could do was to have faith in the goodness of people, yet she kept on smiling. And it is my firm belief that I can put the same faith in her."
"It's scary to yield control, Kallen. I know. But is it so bad a thing to trust?"
The worst part that she was not even wrong. Kallen wanted to trust. She wanted to believe that everything would work out. She trusted Naoto and Ohgi. But she just could not bring herself to do it now.
"Mind control," she reiterated the big problem.
"Which affects neither you nor Ohgi-san," Sayoko countered. "You didn't remain long enough to even ask."
The way she said it gave Kallen pause. Once she looked up at the genially smiling maid, Sayoko elaborated for her: "Ohgi-san and Tohdoh-san both agreed to this of their own volition. The same is true of Sumeragi-san. The ones master Lelouch had to force were the radicals among the freedom fighters. Though I wonder some days if this is not kinder, even if it violates their free will. Their lives are saved and used for a greater purpose after all, to obtain the very thing they're ready to lay it down for."
At first she felt disbelief, but by the end Kallen had to snort. "I can tell propaganda when I hear it," she snarked half-heartedly.
Sayoko grinned back. "Worth a try."
After saying that, she went back to petting her head and Kallen melted back into her ministrations. The tension bled out of her now.
"I'm biased because I served faithfully for many years," Sayoko admitted. "I will follow them wherever they go, regardless the danger or dishonour. Some have called me a traitor, others questioned my lack of pride. But their words mean nothing to me, Kallen. I could not be more proud to have found a master worth following to hell and back. Even if you disagree, I only ask you to try seeing what I see. Give them a chance to do right by you and yours."
At her heart of hearts, Kallen liked the way Sayoko outlined it. It did not sound so bad, even if it was still scary. Even if Kallen was still wary. At the same time, she knew that none of what she was told could be backed with proof.
All she knew was that she was not under Geass. If she were, she could not even consider refusing.
And despite it all, she did want to believe them. Lelouch and Nunnally both.
"Not like I have a choice," she finally said, failing to even grouse. She was already in the thick of it, there was no backing out. The only way past was through.
Another huff came from Sayoko, this one more felt than heard. "Such is life," she mused. "We can only hold onto something stable and wait out the storm."
Kallen accepted her wisdom with a slow nod and pulled back. Sayoko let go without a fuss, allowing her to stretch.
"And that was a weird posture to be in."
"You're a bit too big to sit on my lap," Sayoko teased kindly. "Not to mention that this would appear inappropriate."
The joke startled a laugh out of Kallen, who still felt oddly comfortable. "What, do you do that with Lelouch?"
Whether she noticed the attempt to snark or not, Sayoko's response was earnest all the same: "I used to when he was younger. He complained more, though."
"Hah. Boys."
"Quite."
A short pause followed, during which she clasped Kallen's hands again. "But if you need someone to lend an ear or spend comfort, do not hesitate to call on me, Kallen."
She just nodded, still overwhelmed by the sheer kindness heaped on her. Kallen barely did not duck her head under it.
"What's with the lack of honorifics?" she mumbled, which caused Sayoko's smile to widen a fraction.
"Spending comfort somewhat contradicts being respectful. But you're right, Kozuki-san. Now let me see to your face, then I will find you some ice cream."
She just sat there and let Sayoko clean up her lightly muddled makeup. Getting out of that woman's fussing felt all but impossible, she just had that sort of energy about her. Something motherly.
And somehow, Kallen could not find it in herself to be mad anymore.
Sayoko was right. She was in a bad spot right now, but better opportunities would come eventually. For now, Kallen could just bide her time and see what happened. And maybe, just maybe, Lelouch and Nunnally would do the right thing after all.
The pair passed by C.C., who was now lounging around in the hallway. The immortal woman's gaze followed them for a moment, though neither noticed her pleased smile.
"Some days I wonder how these children do it," she mused out loud. "Then again, all of history is riddled with oddities like them. But what game are you playing now?"
The servants near enough to hear thought her to be talking to herself. In fact, she did. But nobody wondered who it was she addressed, even if her question would not be heard. None noticed that her gaze rested on a painting of Empress Marianne.