1. Due to issues with external spam filters, QQ is currently unable to send any mail to Microsoft E-mail addresses. This includes any account at live.com, hotmail.com or msn.com. Signing up to the forum with one of these addresses will result in your verification E-mail never arriving. For best results, please use a different E-mail provider for your QQ address.
    Dismiss Notice
  2. For prospective new members, a word of warning: don't use common names like Dennis, Simon, or Kenny if you decide to create an account. Spammers have used them all before you and gotten those names flagged in the anti-spam databases. Your account registration will be rejected because of it.
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Since it has happened MULTIPLE times now, I want to be very clear about this. You do not get to abandon an account and create a new one. You do not get to pass an account to someone else and create a new one. If you do so anyway, you will be banned for creating sockpuppets.
    Dismiss Notice
  4. If you wish to change your username, please ask via conversation to tehelgee instead of asking via my profile. I'd like to not clutter it up with such requests.
    Dismiss Notice
  5. Due to the actions of particularly persistent spammers and trolls, we will be banning disposable email addresses from today onward.
    Dismiss Notice
  6. We have added another rule, please check the Rules post for more information.
    Dismiss Notice

For the She-lulz (She-ra 2018/gamer/oc)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by mkasana, May 20, 2019.

Loading...
  1. Furian

    Furian Just here to deliver chicken

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2018
    Messages:
    1,169
    Likes Received:
    6,856
    Is the original of this series good? Considered watching it for nostalgia purposes but I couldn't be assed to rewatch he man from so many years ago. Is this better?
     
  2. Threadmarks: 4. For the Survivalz
    mkasana

    mkasana About as omniscient as everyone else

    Joined:
    May 8, 2019
    Messages:
    152
    Likes Received:
    2,891
    We can’t do this.

    We can’t do this at all.

    Ancient Dracobug
    HP: 119 950/120 000
    Level: 50

    Ten shots from Rogelio was the only thing did any kind of damage to this thing.
    [​IMG]
    He’s using heavy duty rifle. Weapon so rare it’s used only in the most strategically significant of places. That thing doesn’t have infinite ammo. It has like five shots a mag. He has like four of them. The only reason we have them is because Shadow weaver wanted to have us prepared for this. I guess robots are less expendable than super rare weapons that are hardly used.
    The rest are weapons he brought for us in case we need them.

    “Rogelio, pass the weapons!” I yell at him to which he nods and throws me two handguns.
    [​IMG]
    I take aim and shoot at the monster.
    -1HP
    Well, shit.

    The name really describes it well. A combination of a lizard and a bug. Its torso made of reptilian leather ending near the limbs where a chitinous exoskeleton protects them. The body is covered in moss, really selling the whole ancient thing. Its eyes are like that of a fly. Which is weird since its head is made in such a fashion that its eyes are facing forwards like that of a lion or other predators so that negates the 360-degree vision.
    Doesn’t stop it from being perceptive as hell.

    Oh, it’s after me now. Great. I immediately run towards the nearest tree to climb it and hope this thing doesn’t have the intellect to bring the tree down to get to me.

    I somehow manage to climb a tree and the creature tries to jump up and get me.
    Meanwhile Rogelio climbed tree opposite of me, which was pretty far away since the monster is in a field encircled by trees. The fact that it looks like an arena is purely accidental.

    He takes aim and shoots it
    -5HP

    Yay! We’ll be here for less than half an eternity at this rate.
    It gets pissed of again at Rogelio aggroing it.

    At the moment the monster leaves me be Catra jumps from an adjacent tree to mine and pokes me in the shoulder.

    “So, how are we getting out of this mess?” She asks me as the monster charges the tree Rogelio is shooting from

    “Why don’t you ask Adora? She surely is working on a plan.” She just snorts.
    “Yeah, well she’s been trying to come up with something for the last five minutes and nothing comes to mind. Better to ask you than just wait till something falls from the tree. In our case literally.”

    I look at the Dracobug and see how it acts and moves.
    It’s too heavy to lift itself upright, every step causes the ground to make way for the weight of its limbs.

    Perhaps. Yes, that could work. It might even damage it a lot.
    “Catra reach into my backpack and pull out the small black boxes.” She nods and takes them out. There are 10 of them. I’d do it myself but there’s not enough room for me to move much on the branch.

    “Okay, now what.” She asks.

    “You should be able to pull one side out.” She does so and since I hear a click. So, I continue. “As you probably noticed the side you tried to pull out most probably stopped a centimeter before actually being pulled out. That’s fine it’s supposed to do that. Now you can turn the extended side by 180 degrees. After you do that you just push it back in.”

    I wait a while for her to do so.
    “Ok what now.”

    “Congratulations! You just primed a bomb!”

    “What?!” She exclaims.

    “Relax it’s a mine. So long as you don’t press the side that you pulled out, you’ll be fine.”
    I hear her gulp. Probably should have told her what it was shouldn’t I. Oh well there’s hopefully a next time.

    “Ok. My plan is simple. You and Lonny both take these boxes and prime them. Then you scatter them across the field. Me, Rogelio and Adora will get it’s attention by firing at it. As it goes after us it will eventually step on these mines. And detonate them. It should do a considerable amount of damage to it. Hopefully enough for it to retreat.” I finish and am met with silence.

    “You want me to go down there and put bombs under it’s legs? Are you insane?!” She screeches.

    “Yes.” I give her a simple reply. In the end aren’t we all a bit crazy.

    She blinks a couple of times and gains a resigned look. “Fine, but you owe me. Alright?”

    “Everyone’s lives are on the line and you want to make a deal for it? Yeah, sure whatever. I’ll do what you want so long as it isn’t anything too bad.” She just jumped away and I readied my pistols.

    I shoot.
    -1HP

    It turns to me and starts to charge. I see to my right that Catra and Lonny run into the open field and start planting the bombs.
    I keep shooting as you might think it does little.

    It rams into the tree and it starts to bend over.
    Shit it’s going to fall!

    I jump to another tree. The dracobug tries to claw at me as I jump, but I’m too high up for it to reach.

    I immediately take out my communicator. In hindsight we should’ve activated them since we disembarked, mistakes were made, and we’ll live another day to not do them again.
    I wave it around hoping that Rogelio will see it. He is hard to see from this distance and him being green in front of green background, but the mimicking wave is enough for me to notice something gray in his hands.

    “Rogelio, I need you to shoot the bug again. The field is filled with mines so it should take some damage as it tries to rush at you.” I tell him through my communicator. I hear a hiss from the other end and take it as confirmation.

    Then a big blast hits the shell of the monster.
    -10 HP

    Must have been a critical.
    How much HP does it have anyway?

    Ancient Dracobug
    HP: 119 800/120 000
    Level: 50

    It once again refocuses on Rogelio and start to rush at his tree. It has very basic mind set. Get attacked attack the thing that harmed you. Pretty sure were nothing more than annoyances to it if the damage were dealing to it is anything to go by.
    That means we’re closer than we think if my gaming sense is right and this is some sort of temple guardian.

    The creature rushes across the field until a very audible click was heard and the fireworks started.
    The explosion engulfed the entire limb and sent a shock wave that almost made me fall of off the tree.

    -10 000 HP

    The chitinous armor that made up its leg was fractured and in someplace fell apart entirely. It screeched in pain and stumbled to the left to relieve its right leg of the pain caused by the explosion only to step on another mine.

    -10 000 HP

    Another howl of pain echoes throughout the forest.

    -50 HP

    -50 HP

    It’s taking damage from the wounds now. Good, that makes it so much easier.

    Ancient Dracobug
    HP: 99 700/120 000
    Level: 50

    Now it’s trashing around, completely confused and blinded by the pain as it moves erratically in every direction.

    Give it a moment. Another click. Another explosion.

    -5 000 HP

    The damage decreased. Why?
    Ah. It stepped on another mine with the same leg as before and now it’s just a stump. There is only so much damage you can cause before the limb gets destroyed huh.

    I take my com and talk to Rogelio to shoot the bugs exposed limbs.
    I hear a sizzling sound and a green color as it hits the Dracobug’s exposed leg.

    -350 HP

    No defense bonuses for you sucker.

    It steps on another mine with its right hind leg.
    -10 000 HP

    Another leg without armor, but that is not what interests me. The moment the first explosion happened I felt something. It’s hard to describe, the best I can come up with is like me being a radar and it appears like a blip to me. Short, always when explosion happens and then it disappears with the explosion.

    Basic fire manipulation level up.

    Oh, huh that’s neat, I guess.

    The Dracobug screeches and starts to run away as Rogelio now joined with other keep on shooting its exposed limbs.

    Ancient Dracobug
    HP: 88 200/120 000
    Level: 50

    It ran away. Huh so we survived. None got hurt either, so that’s bonus.

    Congratulations! You survived an encounter with an Ancient Dracobug and made it flee.
    Reward: 100 Exp, 1 000 Hord tokens, Basic loot chest


    You leveled up x4
    48 Stat points available

    A loot chest? Really? Was this made by EA? If so, I’ll GG out of this now to save myself the suffering of DLCs and other shit.

    How would I even pay? Doesn’t matter they would probably find a way.

    I jump down form the tree I was on and dismiss the notification.

    Being the smart guy that I am I walk around the open field to not set off any mines and soon enough I meet up with my family.

    “Good work Catra, Lonny.” I nod at each of them.

    “Yeah, well nest time you’re the one who’ll plant them.” She said grumpily. Pouty Catra is adorable Catra.
    Lonny just shrugged.

    Rogelio checks his weapon for any possible damage.

    Adora walks up to us with Kyle hiding behind her.

    “Good work Markus with the plan.” She nods at me which I return.

    “We shouldn’t be that far from our objective.” I tell them as I look at the datapad.

    They nod and we resume our walk.
    “And turn on your coms so we can talk if we get separated.” I hear various sounds of agreements.

    “That was terrifying how did you guys remain so calm?” Asks Kyle still a bit shook from our boss battle experience.

    Adora decides to start.
    “As you captain, I have to make sure you survive long enough to complete our mission. I trust Markus’s and Rogelio’s actions since they are both extremely capable each in their own rights. I took you with me since you are the least experienced of us. Catra followed me, but she does that most of the time so it wasn’t unexpected. Thus I decided to send her to ask Markus to make a plan whilst I would try and make my own. His plan whilst more dangerous was faster and the advantages would outstrip the downsides enough to be worth it.”

    Kyle just nods at her explanation. He turns to Rogelio who just hisses at him.

    Then he turns to Catra. “I just followed Adora as she said. Though I expected that I’d be sent to talk with Markus about a plan. Otherwise yeah, I was bit scared since I had to be in the same field as that thing. It worked out in the end and Markus owes me, so I’d say it turned out well.”

    Lonny decides to chime in. “Wait Markus promised you something for planting those bombs whilst I get nothing! That’s not fair!”

    Catra just smirks. “What is it that Markus often says in the mornings? Early bird gets the worm? Guess you should have been there as well.” She says amused.
    Lonny left eye twitches. “I wouldn’t be able to climb that tree fast enough to ask him anything. You were the first logical option since you’re the most agile out of all of us.”

    Catra shrugs her shoulders. “Not my problem, Lonny not my problem at all.” She says that with a lot of glee in her voice.

    “You can ask of me anything too Lonny.” I tell her. This bickering is really pointless and headache inducing.
    What ever she wanted to say dies in her mouth, and she shuts up.

    Kyle then turn to me. I think of what to say.
    It wasn’t as bad as I feared, but it definitely was tiring.

    “Annoying. That is the best way to describe this fight. It dragged on for too long because it was well defended, and it pisses me off that we faced such a dangerous creature so soon. I know that The Shimmering woods are dangerous, but not enough to encounter a monster like this so soon. If we brought a tank, then we could’ve killed it very quickly. Sadly, we don’t have that privilege, and this happened.
    If we receive another mission into this place, I’ll drag the person responsible for our supplies through whatever toxic waste I can find!”

    I got a bit ranty there.

    “You know that that person is Shadow weaver, right?” Catra replies.

    “I retract my statement about dragging.” Was my immediate reply and instead I focus on my stat screen.
    Markus
    Novakid
    AGE: 8,5 YEARS
    STR:275
    AGI: 231
    DEX: 173
    INT: 258
    WIS: 137
    CHA: 176
    SP: 48
    HP: 2275/2275
    MP: 1840/1840

    Not bad, not bad. With how things are now I should probably increase my Dex and Int stats. Maybe add a bit into Wis? 16 points to each.

    Markus
    Novakid
    AGE: 8,5 YEARS
    STR:275
    AGI: 231
    DEX: 189
    INT: 274
    WIS: 153
    CHA: 176
    SP: 0
    HP: 2275/2275
    MP: 1922/1922

    Nice.

    Soon enough we reach a cave that should if the coordinates are right be the entrance to the place where the artifact lies.
    I get the feeling it will only get worse from here on out.




    AN: Sorry it took so long. Hope you enjoyed it. Next chapter will arrive within this century don’t worry.

    EDIT: Added weapons images
     
    Last edited: Jun 24, 2019
  3. Malbutorius

    Malbutorius Xenophile

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2016
    Messages:
    4,142
    Likes Received:
    12,138
    Looks like you're going to be leaning heavily into the Gamer mechanics side of things, I'd hoped you just put it in there to encourage the MC to get better, as a sort of motivational thing. But I guess not. Oh well, at least it's inspired me to write a fic myself.
     
  4. jo demon

    jo demon Undertale, Yay

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2016
    Messages:
    6,092
    Likes Received:
    19,412
    Is it a she-ra fic?
     
  5. The Hangman's laugh

    The Hangman's laugh I trust you know where the happy button is?

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2017
    Messages:
    885
    Likes Received:
    2,945
    Mind linking when you post it might be worth a look see.
     
  6. Sidvious

    Sidvious Not too sore, are you?

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2018
    Messages:
    297
    Likes Received:
    1,627
    You just gonna leave a small minefield laying around? Not gonna maybe mark them just in case you ever need to come back?
     
  7. mkasana

    mkasana About as omniscient as everyone else

    Joined:
    May 8, 2019
    Messages:
    152
    Likes Received:
    2,891
    Not that much. If I had to write stats for every creature he meets then I'd go insane. The way the damage was distributed was something that I thought of when I was listening to some music whilst thinking how to take down this mighty beast.
    The mine damage was chosen at random really. Wanted to give them something that would make it somewhat plausible for them to win without a curbstomp. Everything after that just came naturaly.

    It's gonna be fine. Plus seeing some rebellion shmuck get blown to bits would propably make their day.
     
  8. Sidvious

    Sidvious Not too sore, are you?

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2018
    Messages:
    297
    Likes Received:
    1,627
    Or y'know really break it for some other horde troopers one day.

    Markus: "Why did I just get random xp from horde soldiers?"
     
    OrigamiPhoenix likes this.
  9. The Hangman's laugh

    The Hangman's laugh I trust you know where the happy button is?

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2017
    Messages:
    885
    Likes Received:
    2,945
    I hope Markus stays with the Horde because I just started to watch this show, and honesty they seem to have the only interesting characters plus, I don't know why but pastel colours really irritate me.
     
  10. jo demon

    jo demon Undertale, Yay

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2016
    Messages:
    6,092
    Likes Received:
    19,412
    It took me a bit to get used to the odd coloring for the princesses too.
     
  11. The Hangman's laugh

    The Hangman's laugh I trust you know where the happy button is?

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2017
    Messages:
    885
    Likes Received:
    2,945
    please tell be Adora at least changes her Horde uniform to something safer to wear around,the horde's enemy's because dear god she may as well be wearing a shirt saying "I'm a spy shoot in the head"

    Or so who thought Princess who none of them seem to have a training in anything, battle related lead a fucking. Or at least dose Seahawk die painfully as a sailor the way he treats his boats is just unforgivable.
     
  12. jo demon

    jo demon Undertale, Yay

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2016
    Messages:
    6,092
    Likes Received:
    19,412
    Nope. Quite honestly, I'm not even sure she owns any other clothing, it doesn't seem like it.
    I don't understand the first question.
     
    The Hangman's laugh likes this.
  13. The Hangman's laugh

    The Hangman's laugh I trust you know where the happy button is?

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2017
    Messages:
    885
    Likes Received:
    2,945
    Really they own kingdoms and they can't get the girl a jacket or something.

    And sorry about mess the second question was it was late, it was more a rant on the fact they put the princess who none of them seem a single clue of how to lead, plan and can barely fight in charge of their army.
     
  14. Threadmarks: 5. For the Explorerz
    mkasana

    mkasana About as omniscient as everyone else

    Joined:
    May 8, 2019
    Messages:
    152
    Likes Received:
    2,891
    The cave is surprisingly comfortable. I few spiders here and there. The air is getting warmer the deeper we go.

    Soon enough we come to a halt. Infront of us stands a crystal wall with carvings too precise to be made by hand. The crystals were glowing, yet our flashlights couldn’t cause such a show when they hit the wall.

    “C’mon there must be some way of getting in!” Lonny shouts angrily. It has been 10 minutes since we arrived, and we have yet to find a way to open the doors.

    “Markus you’re the tech guy. Isn’t there something you can do?” Really? I guess some things don’t change no matter what world you’re in. Help one guy run a game by downloading graphic drivers because his were too old and you’re praised as the greatest I.T. prodigy of all time. Here fix a stupid datapad because a battery malfunctioned so you change it and you’re a super genius.

    “Look these ruins are older than the Hord itself. There is no goddamn way that I can open them. Sides it’s not just tech, it’s magic as well and who knows how that works. I sure don’t. Shadow weaver never taught any magic to anyone.”

    My response only makes Lonny angrier. “Are you serious! This entire mission was completely pointless!” She shouts.

    Rogelio opens a lazy eye at her.

    Lonny blushes a little in embarrassment. “Oh, sorry. I lost my cool. Sorry for waking you up Rogelio.”

    He fell asleep within three minutes, curled into ball and closed his eyes. Apparently, it’s cold enough for him to feel sleepy. So, I’ll have to wake him up with the tail trick again.

    Adora meanwhile was in deep thought, pacing around. Makes me think she’ll make a trench just by stepping the ground too much.

    Kyle was with Rogelio his head on the reptiles’ back. He kept looking around in worry. How he finds his scaly body comfortable I don’t know maybe the fact that there could be a monster ready to attack you at any moment enough incentive to see Rogelio’s’ back as the comfortable options out of whatever his scared mind can come up with.
    At least that is what I think.

    As for Catra…

    I felt vibrations on my back. As you probably guessed it’s Catra purring whilst laying on my back. At least Rogelio has the decency to honor his deal, she just waltzes to me and lays on me like she owns me, the fool. Soon it will be you who will be used as a warming toy as I lay on you and slowly start to touch that soft fur- NO! God, why did I want to take it that way. Ew. No, just no.

    “Does it matter? If we can’t get it then there is no reason to feel afraid of failure. We can’t get punished for something we aren’t responsible for.” She says nonchalantly.

    “You just want Hordak to shout at Shadow weaver, right?” I ask her.

    She hums in conformation.

    “You do realize that if he shouts at her she’ll be pissed at us. Right?” She stills, gets up and backflips so she can see me face to face.
    “You need to get this door open yesterday!” Heh, works every time. Sadly, it works that well for everyone. Even me.

    “I told you I can’t open whatever door there is to be unlocked. It’s ancient and I don’t have the technology or the resources to find and open them…And shouting at me won’t make it any quicker.”
    She stops herself from whatever verbal lashing she wanted to unleash upon me and instead resorts to glaring.

    We hear the movement of rock and see the crystal wall have its hidden door open. Of course, it is none other than Adora who is standing next to the newly opened passage, looking just as confused as the rest of us.

    I immediately march up to her making Catra fall on her back and cry out in pain.

    “How did you do that!” She flinches back bit from my outburst.

    “I-I just touched this rhombus and the doors just opened. I swear.” She takes a step back a bit of sweat.

    “Hey, Markus, you should calm down.” Catra slowly tells me. I look at her and the others and see what’s wrong. Rogelio has fully woken up staring at me. Kyle is hiding behind him and Lonny is sweating up a waterfall.

    Now that I look, I notice their shadows are completely wrong. They’re extending away from me like I’m the source of of the light that is…
    I take a strand of my hair and see that it’s trying to float upwards or more importantly it’s glowing.

    Okay. Fine, calm down. The shadows start to change positions, indicating that I stopped being a light house.

    “Seriously, how did you do that?” She shrugs.

    “I don’t know I just touched it and it opened on its own.” I sigh at her answer and start to move into the entrance.

    Everyone starts to follow. Adora takes the lead and we start to explore this cave temple.

    “Seems you’re not as good as you thought. Right Markus?” Lonny says with a joking tone.

    “Oh, right how could I forget the ancient and proven method of hacking magitech. Touching the fucking wall.”

    Everyone turned to me.

    “Did you just cuss?” Catra asks amused.

    “Yes, so what if I fucking did?” I retort.

    “If Shadow weaver were here, she would smack you around so hard. It would actually be funny to see.” She says.

    “You know she would probably find a reason to drag you into the punishment as well. Right?”

    She shrugs. “I know. Don’t care. Your face would be hilarious though.”

    “Well she’s not here so who fucking cares?”

    “Yes, so what if I fucking did?” I hear my voice and slowly turn to its’ source.

    Out of all the people here I didn’t expect Rogelio to do this.
    He’s holding a small datapad that I made as a gift for everyone on their seventh birthday.

    “Really? You Rogelio? Out of all the people here? You?” He only shrugs.

    I groan. “Fine what do you want?”

    He just raises two fingers. “Fine. You can have me as your heat lamp for two hours a day. Happy.”
    He nods and fiddles with the datapad. I guess I’ll take his word or the lack of it.

    We continue to explore.
    Sometime later
    I never would have thought that exploring ancient temples made out of magitech would be so boring. No traps, no security drones, no anything really.

    I check the datapad. Huh, we must be getting close cuz’ these energy readings are through the roof.

    We eventually come to a room, most probably a throne room. What lead me to believe that this was the case is probably the giant chair that was in the middle. Unless this temple was a giant spaceship. But that would be stupid. Who would have the time to repurpose the entire ship to be a labyrinth and have it in near perfect condition. I mean aside from being buried under a shit ton of rock.

    As we near the center few holographic screens pop to life. Each containing complete gibberish. I guess the software didn’t survive.

    “So where is this artifact that we’re supposed to get?” Asks Catra.

    “Hmm. It should be in the room behind the throne. That’s where the readings are strongest.”

    “Let’s go then.” Says Lonny very excited at the idea of leaving this place.

    I nod and open the door. It looks like the ship idea is more plausible than I thought.

    The room looks like captain’s quarters. It has some really old ornate bed its support made out of crystals like the rest of the ship and they even made a tunnel that leads fucking nowhere. We’d be too lucky if this was a way out of here.

    On the table is a simple holographic device with our objective as a power source.

    I take it out and give it to Adora. “This is what we’re here for. Let’s go back.”

    As we are about to enter between the crystal temple and the cave it’s buried in the entire place starts to shake. Some rocks fall and the entrance that we came through is blocked.

    What? I am not surprised in the slightest. That’s how it usually is in these situations. That or running from a rock ball Indiana Jones style.

    Everyone looks completely terrified by what happened. Except Rogelio. He’s as unimpressed with this as everything else. Lonny after a short while growls in frustration.

    I sigh.

    “Alright everyone we’re leaving through the hole that was dug by whomever lived here.”

    So we go all the way back.

    We hesitantly take few steps. Expecting some sort of trap or some sort of spell, maybe even a boss. Oh, that reminds me I still need to open that Basic Loot Chest. Maybe I’ll get some good gear out of it.

    After around half an hour we enter into this I don’t know what to call it. It’s like the heart of multiple tunnels. A lot of the tunnels seem natural and so does this cave. How that guy knew that dug this tunnel knew this was here will probably remain a mystery forever. A shame indeed. It would prove quite useful in survival training.

    I check the gamers map to see the best route out of this annoying place.

    “Alright, let’s go that way.” I gesture towards.

    “How can you be so sure.” Asks Catra.

    “The air isn’t as foul as the other tunnels.” She looks at me like I’m some sort of idiot. My dear girl I find that look utterly hurtful. Rogelio gives me a nod of support which makes me feel a bit better.

    “Ok let’s go then.” Adora says.

    That’s when the world decided to say fuck you and the entire place started to shake. Rocks started to fall all around us.

    “Run for it quickly!” I shout and everyone does so.

    “Catra watch out!” I yell at her as I lunge at her making us both fall to the ground.

    “Hey what was that for?!” Right after she finishes a rock falls where she would have been had I not jumped for her.

    We both get up and start running again. That delay made us the last of the group who had to run towards the tunnel.

    It seems that Lady Luck is suffering from a bipolar disorder. Because just as me and Catra are about to reach them a big rock falls in front of the entrance sealing it of for us and a making the ground beneath us crack.

    We as ordered by the laws of gravity fall into the pit. I must have been hit by a rock because I lost my consciousness when I felt something hit the back of my head.




    AN: I don’t really have an excuse for not updating for so long aside form general laziness.
     
  15. jo demon

    jo demon Undertale, Yay

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2016
    Messages:
    6,092
    Likes Received:
    19,412
    Lazyness, truly the most insidious enemy.
     
    mkasana and Chaospawn like this.
  16. mirasin

    mirasin Know what you're doing yet?

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2019
    Messages:
    231
    Likes Received:
    656
    Mc × catra? Please. I hope he gets stronger soon, learns some magic.
     
  17. Threadmarks: 6. For the Comfortz
    mkasana

    mkasana About as omniscient as everyone else

    Joined:
    May 8, 2019
    Messages:
    152
    Likes Received:
    2,891
    Ow.

    I don’t know what’s worse the pain in the back of my head or the fact that I am down to 500 HP.
    I slowly get up only to stumble back on to the floor.

    Yep.

    The headache is worse. Since trying to get up is really hard right now I change tactics and walk on all fours. Damn it I just want to lay in bed and do nothing.

    Why is it so dark in here! My flashlight is broken, others probably got to safety which is good and Catra… Catra!

    “Catra! Are you alright!” I shout hoping she’s fine.

    “Yeah, I’m over here!” I look around and see only darkness. I heard her voice come from every direction.

    “How about something more specific. I can’t see shit right now.”

    “What do you mean you can’t see shit? I can see you just fine.”

    “You’re a literal cat person of course you can see in the dark!” There was silence for a short time.

    “Walk forward. “I slowly try to get back up and start slowly walking towards her. Then something makes me trip and I fall face first into the ground.

    “Pfff, hahahaha!” Catra starts laughing like a lunatic. Must’ve bumped her head as well if she’s acting like this.
    “Sorry, sorry. I couldn’t resist.” I only grunt in annoyance.

    “I don’t know about you Catra, but I would love to get out of here and reunite with the rest of the team.”

    Right. Well I wasn’t joking when I said to go forward, you just need to take big steps to not fall again because some rocks are inconveniently misplaced.”

    I think for a moment. “How about you come to me Catra. Then you can help me walk us out of here.”

    I heard some rocks moving and then a yelp of pain. “Ow! Damn I think my ankle is broken.”
    Hard way it is then.

    “Just navigate me.”

    It took some time with few falls at my expense but eventually I reached her.

    “So, what now?” She asks. I think for a short while. Hopefully we’re still in the cave system with a way out. If my hunch is correct, I’d be fine without food or water thanks to gamer but Catra? She’d die of thirst and hunger.

    “We’ll look for a way out. Get on my back and show me the way.” I tell her as I crouch and turn my back against her.
    She seems to hesitate a bit considering I don’t feel her moving at all.

    “You sure? You aren’t exactly the strongest.” I can lift 30 kilos which admittedly isn’t a lot by this worlds’ standard. Pretty sure I would blow a few biologists minds back in my old world with this body.

    “What? You afraid about weighting a bit too much?” I ask with a bit of chuckle.

    “Ha, ha. Funny.” She says in completely dead-bored tone. I hear rock moving. She’s probably getting up and... yep, I feel her hands on my shoulders as she’s trying to balance on one foot.

    She hugs me by the neck from behind and I hold her by the thigs.

    “Comfortable?” I ask her. I don’t get a reply.

    “Catra?”

    “Huh? Yeah, comfy.” Hmm. I look at her arms and use observe.

    Catra
    Felinid
    AGE: 7 YEARS
    STR:109
    AGI:535
    DEX:365
    INT:205
    WIS:93
    CHA:73
    HP:10000/10900
    MP:-
    STATUS: Exhausted (5 hours)/Broken: Ankle (1 month)/Headache (2 hours)

    “You’re exhausted. I know it’s a bit stupid to ask this after we fell down a hole but does your head hurt?” She didn’t respond for a while.

    “Yeah. Not much but I do feel it. Walk forward I think I saw a path that way.” Thus, I simply followed her orders.




    We’ve been walking for a while now. Neither of us said a word. I’m focusing on not tripping on any rocks and Catra’s… She still has a headache and suffers from slight exhaustion.

    “Say Markus.” I tilt my head and hum questioningly.

    “Why are you the way you are?” Where did that come from?

    “What do you mean by that?” Seriously how am I supposed to answer this.

    “Aside from Adora you’re the only one who seems to care about others.” Why I care is what you’re asking, basically.

    “Family I guess.”

    “Family unit? As far as I know we’re all orphans. There’s nothing tying us together.” Seriously? Did I misjudge the relationship in our team? Nah, maybe a misunderstanding.

    “Oh? So, we aren’t friends?” She tries to move a bit.

    “What?! No, of course you’re a friend. A bit annoying at times when you talk about your technobabble and all that, but you are the best resting spot in the Horde.” Really, that’s what our relationship is based on? I’m the most comfortable heater around so you stick with me.

    “So, I’m just an over glorified heater and seater to you?” She completely stiffens at that.

    “That’s not what I meant! I was just…joking around about that. I genuinely think you’re not terrible or a moron. I mean we’ve known each other for… I don’t even know how long, but you’re not someone I’d like to lose.” She says in a small sad voice. That sounds like… heh.

    “Hehehe. You sound like Adora right now you know that?” She tightened her hold around my neck with her arms. Really, it’s almost like she’s hugging me I mean the alternative is falling to a cold, hard ground headfirst.

    “Don’t even joke about that! I’d sooner go to the Beast Island than sound like Adora.” She says with a fake tone of anger, it’s more playful than anything else really.

    “Family. What I imagine under family is a group of people that support each other through thick and thin. No matter their allegiances. Family would come first above all else. You don’t help the member because you might gain something out of it but because it’s just the right thing to do.”

    “Now who sounds like Adora?” I snort at that. “Me? Sound like Adora? Are you sure you’re fine? Wanna take a break and rest for a while?”

    “Don’t patronize me.” She says with a pout. At least I imagine she’s pouting since I can’t see her.

    “I’m serious. Head injuries are pretty bad if left unattended.” A simple headache could be more that just a small pain from a fall. We should really find a way out.

    “Jeez don’t babysit me like a toddler.” Fine. The moment I’ll see your status getting worse I’m turning full nursery mode. I have 2000 Hord Tokens and access to shop. I’m sure there are few medical supplies that I can buy and apply to teammates.

    Hmmm.
    [SHOP]
    [Factions:]
    [-Hord]
    [+Armor]
    [+Weapons]
    [+Boxes (Locked)]
    [+Materials (Locked)]
    [+Vehicles (Locked)]
    [+Miscellaneous]
    ---------------------------------
    [+Princess Alliance (Locked)]

    I look through the miscellaneous section and see few first aid kits of varying sizes and prices. The most basic is about the size of my hand at 50 tokens. It’s really just bandages with and few plasters of several sizes.
    The bigger one is filled with few more things like Sterile Eye Dressing and Triangular bandages. Personally, I never used a first aid kit in either of my lives so I don’t know what one would have a triangular bandage for when you have the basic one. Oh, and safety pins. Can’t forget those. That one is 250 tokens.
    The last one has everything. Just…everything, definitely more than I even imagined a first aid kit would have. This one is 750 tokens.

    Now that I’m thinking about it, I never really got any quest for this mission. I slide mentally into the Quest Log. I have the notifications off. I don’t even remember doing that. Huh, the quest is actually there.
    [1st Mission: Find the Artifact]
    [Lord Hordak wants you and your squad to find an artifact in ruins of of the First Ones]
    [Locate the artifact: FAILED]
    [Find the way out of the cave: ONGOING]
    [Don’t die: ONGOING]
    [Reward: 750 Exp, 1000 Hord tokens, Advanced Loot Chest]


    I hope that the reward won’t be reduced because of the fail. Or is it perhaps already showing the reduced reward?

    After a little while longer we finally reach a place that has light. The problem? Light is green. AM I perhaps in some sort of DC universe and we found a green lantern? Heh, I wish.

    As I reach the place and look onwards, I see something that blanks my mind out.




    Magic.
    It is everywhere. It surrounds us, it penetrates us it binds the world together. At least on this world that is the case.
    Hordak’s existence and the time before his arrival prove worlds beyond Etheria, but what they are like is a mystery.

    The magic of Etheria is hard to learn with exception gifted few. Every wizards and sorceress use magic that exists in the world. The princesses get their magic from their runestones and through their connection to the planet they can use it freely without many drawbacks if any.

    Then there is Markus.
    His magic is self-generating. It comes from nowhere. And over the years it became slightly stronger. Then there’s the fact that he’s generating a lot of heat. It makes me wonder if his excess magic is automatically transforming into heat.

    The child is quite smart, and I have very little doubt that he would have trouble learning magic from me. Perhaps he’s too smart. He made tools and gadgets for his teammates without much prior knowledge. He’s not loyal to the Horde that much is clear to me.

    I, myself am only here to see the fools who wronged me punished and beaten into the ground for their foolishness and stupidity.

    He on the other hand seems to be on the Hord side mostly because of his ‘friends’ or teammates.

    Hmm. Maybe I should give him an offer to teach magic. If he comes back from the mission.

    Honestly, what is Hordak thinking sending children to search for an artifact. Especially if they show so much promise. Adora would definitely become a force captain. Markus is a difficult one to place. He’s someone who’d rather spend his time making things.

    Perhaps I should Hordak about re-equipping our soldiers. They don’t have much in terms of weapons. Firearms are so hard to come by these days we almost never can afford to hand them out. Weird since we build a ridiculous number of droids every week.

    It makes it easier to defend a base without much personnel.’ An explanation that doesn’t really makes spending resources on droids worthwhile. Soldiers with guns had better accuracy than droids when they were shooting at moving targets during weapons tests.

    “Shadow weaver! Ma’am we received reports from the front-line. Soldiers are running out of food.”

    Sigh. Force commander never sleeps. “Just send more. We should have several transports ready for use.” I’ll have to talk to someone and make sure they don’t waste my time with this. They can just contact the food manufacturer themselves.
    At that moment three more people with reports barged in. Never sleeps indeed.




    “Catra! Markus!” Adora shouted as Lonnie and Rogelio tried to get her from the cave entrance.

    They can’t be dead right?! No way they would die so easily!

    “Get a hold of yourself Adora!” Lonnie shouted at Adora trying to calm her down.

    “No, they might still be-“Whatever Adora wanted to say was silenced by Lonnie.

    “Adore even if they are alive, we don’t have a way to help them out as things are now.” Adora stopped trying to get back into the cave.

    “If we get back maybe we could ask Shadow weaver to send someone to look. Right?” Adora says hopefully.

    Lonnie winced a bit. Out of everyone Adora out of all people seemed to live in her bubble where the Hord isn’t the bad side. Literally everyone else knew that wasn’t the case. Even Markus who usually is optimistic about most things know this.

    Thus, the probability of a rescue was extremely slim. Why risk more soldiers for cannon fodder. Lonnie and others don’t really have much value in the eyes of the greater whole.

    It’s pretty obvious to most but every time Lonnie looks at Adora hopeful expression she just can’t bring herself to tell her the truth.

    Lonnie takes a deep breath and looks Adora in the eyes. It really is impossible. “Sure.” Was Lonnie’s only reply.

    If you really are alive Markus and Catra. Please, make it back. If not for your own sake, then for ours.’ Lonnie helped Adora get up and spared one last look to the cave before leaving for the transport.

    Please.




    I don’t know how to feel about this chapter. I kept pushing it away and decided to finish it this week. I hope that it’s not worse than the previous chapters.
     
  18. The Hangman's laugh

    The Hangman's laugh I trust you know where the happy button is?

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2017
    Messages:
    885
    Likes Received:
    2,945
    Good to see you updating again
     
  19. Lifelink

    Lifelink Every flavor in a poke-cup

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2014
    Messages:
    1,743
    Likes Received:
    8,073
    Glad to see this story is being continued.
     
  20. The Hangman's laugh

    The Hangman's laugh I trust you know where the happy button is?

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2017
    Messages:
    885
    Likes Received:
    2,945
    Are there any other faction shops? such as outlander or quest unlocked items?
     
  21. mkasana

    mkasana About as omniscient as everyone else

    Joined:
    May 8, 2019
    Messages:
    152
    Likes Received:
    2,891
    He'll unlock them over time. Since he doesn't know about said factions. He doesn't know the people in the crimson wastes And for tech likes the old Ones would need a quest.
     
  22. Malbutorius

    Malbutorius Xenophile

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2016
    Messages:
    4,142
    Likes Received:
    12,138
    Is the system going to prestige at somepoint? Reducing the stat scaling to being compared to full adults rather than being compared to infants?
     
  23. mkasana

    mkasana About as omniscient as everyone else

    Joined:
    May 8, 2019
    Messages:
    152
    Likes Received:
    2,891
    You mean like when I reach a certain threshold my stats reset and gain something like a star indicating its better rank? I haven't really thought about it. I suppose it could be usefull when the numbers get too ridiculous. He has yet to meet oponents whose stats are high and visible instead of ??? so maybe I could put it in. I'd have to think about at what amount I should cap it. Like every thousand a character gets a star or it should be that at thousand a star at ten thousand two stars and hundred thousand three and so on.

    I'd like to get some opinion on this.
     
  24. The Hangman's laugh

    The Hangman's laugh I trust you know where the happy button is?

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2017
    Messages:
    885
    Likes Received:
    2,945
    It sounds like a good idea and definitely makes sense to stop stats from being absurdly large numbers.
     
    OrigamiPhoenix likes this.
  25. Malbutorius

    Malbutorius Xenophile

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2016
    Messages:
    4,142
    Likes Received:
    12,138
    A little girl has 10K Health, the numbers are already hyper inflated.
     
  26. OrigamiPhoenix

    OrigamiPhoenix Making the rounds.

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2018
    Messages:
    41
    Likes Received:
    147
    I finally realized that the origin of the Gamer system in this universe could be First Ones' magi-tech like a pseudo-Gaia. (If this ruins some twist, I'm willing to spoiler this.)

    If you mean Catra, she's not exactly a little girl. She's a trained cat person and theoretically a much better soldier than Markus... But it is pretty ridiculous compared to Markus' 2k or so.

    @mksana, I recommend making an editing pass over stats in general to reduce stat digits and keep them relatively consistent between each other, then implement the prestige system so every 103x will become a prestige. 1K will be 1 prestige, then 1M will be 2 prestige, then 1B will be 3 prestige, and so on, but I suspect that even 2 prestige will be rare for some time.

    Also, you might want to check back on their ages, since Adora is supposed to be 17/18 by the time of the series' events, and expecting children less than 10 years old to explore a First One's ruin is more stupid evil than the lawful evil we expect from the Horde.
     
  27. Malbutorius

    Malbutorius Xenophile

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2016
    Messages:
    4,142
    Likes Received:
    12,138
    Personally I figured he wanted to get into the action and realized he'd be too strong compared to what he wanted his character to be by the expectations of the Gamer system by then.
     
  28. Threadmarks: 7. For the Expositionz
    mkasana

    mkasana About as omniscient as everyone else

    Joined:
    May 8, 2019
    Messages:
    152
    Likes Received:
    2,891
    Perhaps I should elaborate on blanking out. You see when I saw a green light, I expected something like a secret entrance or something back into the First one’s temple. Instead There’s a big room in front of me with an altar and a giant humanoid sculpture that lacks any facial features and is instead covered in glowing symbols. It sits above it as though judging whatever was meant to be on the table.

    I take a step back which in turn alerts Catra and she tightens her hold on me.

    I look around the tunnel I’m in, then to the room right next to me.

    “Catra, I’ll put you down and look what’s in there.” She just grunted. So, I get on my knee and put her down.

    “Here’s one of my guns and two energy clips. Just in case.”

    “Thanks.” Was all she says. She looks deep in thought. Aight. Let’s hope this isn’t a secret boss room.

    As I start to walk towards the altar in the next room, I notice that the faceless head seems to be looking at me rather than the altar which is weird since I don’t remember it moving.

    The closer I get the brighter the runes on the statue shine.

    Creation.

    ‘What?!’ I immediately stop and look around searching for the source of the voice.

    My dear creation it has been so long since I gazed upon one of you.

    It’s the statue isn’t it? I look at it and see that the runes are moving up to the featureless head and shape into an actual face with eyes and mouth, but no nose oddly enough. When its eyes formed and it finally looked at me I felt a strange sense of warmth, not the same one I feel whenever I ignite in anger or when I purposely try to increase the heat I generate, which proved worthless since I can’t get it above 90O Celsius. Rather it was a warmth of comfort and peace, tranquil peace, no anger, no sadness, no joy, only peace.

    Human, you are… no, you’re not human. Are you? How is this possible? My greatest accomplishment and the most mediocre creation I ever made, copulated and made you. Impossible.

    ‘Gee, thanks for the insult all mighty.’ If I’m right about this then this is The Cultivator.

    You mistake an insult for a fact. It is a physical impossibility for these two creations to reproduce together. Hmm.

    The statue moves and its head reaches closer to me as the glowing eye shaped runes narrow with an inquisitive gaze.

    Interesting. Whomever made you did so through genetic engineering alongside magical rituals. This level of complexity should not be achievable for any mortal race.

    It moves closer.

    I see. Your soul is… Your soul is so much older than your mortal body yet whenever I try to look into your past the closer towards your conception I get, the greater the feeling of absolute annihilation I feel. Your maker must be a being similar to my own if not greater and it is very stingy with who knows about your life before you were born. Hmm, perhaps…

    I never felt more naked in my life, this guy or whatever it is, takes the concept of looking into your soul in the most literal sense. It goes beyond the body. The greater the feeling of something entering my soul to see what makes me tick the more… cautious it gets like it suddenly found itself in a minefield. Then I take a sharp breath as something seemed to snap. The runes glow lessened as its eyes gained surprised and terrified expression. Then it’s brought back into our reality as the stone statue readjusts its sight back at me.

    Very stingy indeed. Though your presence may be a blessing rather than a jest at my expense.

    It got back into its position of looking at the altar.

    I am gone. What you’re speaking to is but a fragment of what I used to be. The Ruin will come back sooner or later.

    Its glow slowly starts to fade.

    I think that with the power given to you by this entity you might be able to slay The Great Ruin. Possibly finally restore the universe to what it should be. Balanced.

    I’m sorry I just had to ask. ‘Does bringing balance mean finding a weapon that erases half of all life in the universe?

    What?! Why would you even… No. It does not. There will be a point in time where creation will reach perfect entropy, an absolute state of no change. That is inevitable for this reality was made this way, but Ruin. Ruin will only speed up the process to the point of it happening within the next millennia should it be freed right now.

    ‘Yeah, here’s the problem. That might’ve already happened. ‘Cuz when I look up into the sky at night there are no stars, only the moons.’

    Your solar system is located in a pocket dimension with next to no way to return. You must find a way out of this place and stop Ruin. I care little as to how you achieve this, but you must do this.

    ‘Why not someone else?’

    I am short on options and combined with the fact that you are probably the only one who can see me as I am-

    ‘As you are?’

    Your felinid friend sees nothing more than a glowing statue and you looking at it.

    I just nod in conformation.

    The Horde would be a useful asset in getting out of this world. Afterall if you can’t do something yourself just create something that can. Which reminds me. Here. This is something I wanted to give the Novakid a long time ago, but Ruin got in the way before I could gift them with it.

    [The Star of The Great West]
    [Rarity: One of a Kind]
    [Rank: SSR]
    Is this what I think it is.
    ‘Is that an artifact for one of the gifted races?’

    It is one meant for the Novakid the oldest and most difficult race I ever had to make. DO not give it to your Lord Hordak. Whatever species he’s supposed to be. Now I must go back to sleep and conserve energy till you find a way out of this dimension.

    ‘Wait! Before you go tell me about the First ones! If you made all life even if you’re a fragment you should know something since, they were on this world, right?’

    It was silent for a while and I started to think that it really dozed off.

    I do not know. They, just like Hordak, aren’t of my creation. That is what I find most disturbing about this world. As an entity that made the universe them existing is something that does not make much sense to me. You should be wary from what little memory I can find they are just as bad as your lord. They turned this world into an unnatural weapon. Thought the reason as to why escapes me.

    Its glow slowly stopped and only few distant echoes were all that was left of a god that stood before me.

    Visit when you have managed to escape this dimension and I shall help in whatever way I can.

    [Epic Quest gained]

    The room was silent only a hallway leading between the legs of the stone statue seemed to be the only thing that changed since I don’t remember seeing it before all this.

    I walk back to Catra. She’s holding the gun in a relaxed position, her hurt leg straight and the other close. She’s looking into the depths of the dark cavern that I can’t see at all. She looks at me.

    “The light in there got dimmer. What did you do?” It wasn’t accusatory more like ‘you did something stupid and I find it funny’.

    I shrug. “Magic stuff. Doesn’t make much sense. Either way a new hole opened under the statue it might lead back into the ruin or even outside. Wanna try it?”

    She lets it go through her head and eventually nods. “We’re probably dead people walking anyway, so sure why not.”

    She climbed back on my back…huh. Anyway, we started walking through the between of the Cultivators legs.

    Finally, after a while we find the light at the end of the tunnel and the moment, we reached the exit the fresh air hit us. I took a deep breath and boy was it the best take of fresh air I’ve ever took. We should probably install ventilation system back in the Fright zone. The wonders a clean nice air make is incredible.

    “Great now instead of being stranded in a cavern in the middle of nowhere we’re in a forest in the middle of nowhere.” Catra says somewhat exhausted. Hey, I did all the walking. Don’t get tired on me.

    “So, what now? Which way to the Horde o warm one?” Well aren’t you the fun one. No wait she is.

    “I don’t know so let’s just pick a direction. Adora had the data pad with the map. Not that it would be of that much use since we don’t know our location to find our way home.” She huffs in annoyance.

    I crouch and grab a long stick and make it stand on its longest. I stop it from falling by ´putting pressure on it with my pointing finger. As I let go it falls to the left.

    “‘Aight let’s go that way.” Catra gave an unintelligent um.

    “You can’t be serious. We’re deciding our survival on a stick? A stick?!” I just turn my head to her, sly smile on my face, though she probably can only see just a half of it.

    “Ye.” She had a glowering expression and I could hear her grouching. Probably in frustration. I would too if I were in her position. But hey, one of us needs to keep it together.

    Okay, okay. I’m not taking it as seriously as I should. I clear my throat.

    “Ahem, right, sorry. We need to choose a way anyhow and I’m still recommending the stick.”

    She groans. “Fiiine. We’ll take your stupid stick path.”

    And so, we walk. A long, boring walk, aside from the encounters with few of the monsters living here. Which we were able to avoid by either hiding behind a tree or climbing it. Those things never really bother looking up.

    After who knows how long. I never bothered to check when we left the cave. We finally arrive at a clearing with a path that leads alongside the edge of the forest all the way to a tower that had a levitating giant glowing egg…. What?

    There’s a bridge leading from the tower towards a big palace that felt really out of place aesthetically when compared to the towers surrounding it alongside the small houses and some farms I see in the distance.

    “No. Nu-uh. There’s no way I’m accepting this!” Catra? What’s wrong?

    “You okay? Catra?” She snorted in slight disbelieve.

    “This is definitely Bright moon. There’s no way that we found our way to Bright moon by following a fucking STICK! And yet. Here. We. Fucking are!” I let her rant out until she falls silent and takes a few deep breaths. She needs some ventilation. In the meanwhile, I just blankly stare at Bright moon, our archnemesis headquarters and think and say only one thing.

    “Shit.” That about describes the whole goddamn situation.

    “We need to get out of here right now!” No need to tell me twice sister.

    “One step back, turn around and run until we’re sure that we’re at least a few kilometers away.” She hummed in agreement and we slowly took one step back and turned around.

    And wouldn’t you know it there was a spear right in front of my face.

    “In the name of Queen Angella, you are under arrest Horde spies!” Said the guard currently almost poking my nose with the spears’ tip.

    I don’t know how Catra didn’t hear them with her hearing, probably magic. Definitely magic. Anyway, a thought returned with vengeance.

    “Double shit.” The guards scowl only deepened.

    Great, now we’ll have to find a way to break out of jail. Fan-fuckin’-tastic.




    AN: I don’t really have an excuse for such a long absence of updates. Aside from general laziness I have few things to deal with that are related to school and they’re really stressing me out.
    I had to write a story in my native language and got the equivalent of an F. Apparently, I used too much artistic description without much happening in the story. I can’t really come up with a continuation of a story in under 60 minutes and within that time also write it down. I really like to write and expand the characters across multiple chapters with few things happening at the beginning and slowly but surely moving forward until I reaches high speeds.

    As for this story. Well, I’m not sure where to take it in the bit more distant future. Like now I can decide whether Marcus should help Catra escape and return to the Horde or help her escape and instead of returning he goes to the Crimson wastes to eventually down the line, definitely before the show would start like a few days, create his own faction. Or in my opinion safest one. Help Catra escape and stay at Bright moon as a prisoner. Since seeing that Horde uses children would disturb Angella and her soldiers, they would try to help him to join their cause to stop Horde from making child soldiers and give him a better life.
     
  29. Malbutorius

    Malbutorius Xenophile

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2016
    Messages:
    4,142
    Likes Received:
    12,138
    ... You're still children though?

    Seriously, you made the character's way too young for me to take the "Horde Spies" idea seriously. I mean, children don't even have enough psychological build up to handle these kinds of missions, let alone be trusted not to get easily swayed by the Rebellion with food, candy, and basic human empathy.

    I mean, the Horde trained children to be soldiers from childhood, but actually using said children as soldiers is non-canon Stupid Evil performance that at this point I think you're doing just to justify an easier time of defection.

    EDIT: Also, to compare your 260 strength to another system designed to handle damn near any kind of character, you'd have a strength of... 3...
     
    Grub and Exist Error like this.
  30. Bigreader

    Bigreader Not too sore, are you?

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2017
    Messages:
    377
    Likes Received:
    1,545
    Who or what is the cultivator not familiar with the Netflix series so maybe it should have been explained in story.
     
Loading...