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Orignal Fiction idea thread

Discussion in 'CW Index' started by Adyen, Sep 4, 2014.

  1. Adyen

    Adyen Well-Known Member

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    I actually had two original ideas I had wanted to explore. The first one I already have the world-buildinng down especially with regards to the quest based on it.

    The second one is actually from all the 'reincarnation' stories I've been reading these days. I don't know if it's a fad or something, but it gave me a rather interesting idea: What if someone was reincarnated into the same world that they had been living in, and back to the same period of time that they were alive?

    I was planning on using a fantasy setting where the main character either reincarnates into someone really famous during their period of time, or the reverse in which the main character was really famous but then died and reincarnated into someone they've never even heard of before.

    Which idea of the two sounds more interesting?
     
  2. Ct613hulu

    Ct613hulu Vote Cthulhu

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    Please tell us more about your first idea.

    I like your second idea. Giving a character to examine their actions from a outside perspective and deal with how their behavior effects their fellows seems like a very interesting way to demonstrate character growth. You can also have some rather thought provoking and kinky sex scenes if you choose to have the reincarnation become romantically involved with their original. This sounds like a great idea and I would love to read it.

    I think that your second idea would also be very interesting if it were used as a plot for some fanfiction. Seeing Sasuke reincarnated as one of his potential fan girls or reincarnating Azula in the role of Katara immediately come to mind.
     
  3. Jaertin

    Jaertin Well-Known Member

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    In the reincarnation scenario both options sound interesting. Which is preferred would probably depend on what kind of plot you have in mind. Also important what kind of famous person is it, a war hero, a philosopher, a ruler, a Kardashian famous for being famous type?

    Reincarnating into a famous and important person lends itself better to actiony plots, while both options could be character pieces or romances.
     
  4. Himura

    Himura The Cleverest of Fools

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    The Immortal Queen lay dead through unknown means, the world she kept alight begins to darken. The sun crumbles as it cools. A princess must journey, to find the temple where the kingdom was born. But as the world slowly dies, some only wish to watch it burn.

    The Kingdom of Galentine, the eternal country, had stood for for longer than mortal memory. The greatest superpower of the world, born like a salamander from the ashes following the Great Inferno. It was ruled by an immortal queen, a witch of such power as to chain the very will of the world to herself. To protect the burgeoning kingdom she ripped it from the mainland and while the rest of the world warred for what little could be found she provided for her subjects all they could every want.

    In the 108th of the 2nd era the Queens children learn along with the rest of the country of the death of the queen. The sun stalls in an eternal dusk and Magic, once orderly, begins to reek havoc. The very world itself is dying. The Kingdom, having lost it's sheperd is lost.

    The youngest Princess, Ally, remembers the stories she'd been told by her mother. Of the holy cauldron, far beyond the walls and across the sea. The place the Queen had forged the chains to hold the world together. She, along with her servant Colette, sneak out of the country and make their way to the place where it all began.
     
  5. Himura

    Himura The Cleverest of Fools

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    Idea: Assassin Suite
    A group of spies/assassins, 5 years after being recalled to their home state, meet back up for old times sake. The group is 12 in a broad range of characters. Those still alive gathered together in an isolated Villa. After the first day one is found dead by another guest of the resort. Investigation shows that the victim trusted the agressor enough that he didn't react quick enough at first and the agressor was skilled enough to overcome them even if they were injured. Now its a race for them to figure out who among their numbers is the traitor before they can strike again.

    All of them vary wildly, in age, personality, and methodology, but all are quite capable physically though some are more so than others.

    Agent 1 "Alita Gretchov" - Age 24 - Infiltraition specialist.
    Nice girl, polite demure. Not in a relationship but expecting.​
    Agent 2 Urabuchi "The Butcher" Gorou - age 26 - Interigation and terror specialist
    Constantly grinning and polite he seems to give off an aura of a viper luring in it's prey. He's openly a sadist.​
    Agent 3 Ikov - Age 50+ - Military General (The one who dies)
    An old general who was a traitor from the start, the oldest member. He's strict, ruthless, and a cunning strategist.​
    Agent 4 Conner - Age 32 - Assassination
    An unassuming man who is a bit of a ditz. The most lethal QCQ and urban skirmish specialist of the group.​
    Agent 5 Anya Stalina - 19 - Assassination
    Quiet and cool she's still getting used to life outside of being an assassin, has an almost childlike innocence. Loves sweets and cute things.​
    Agent 6 Nanashi - Age 25 - Mass Media and Croud Control Specialist
    Another unassuming young man, a bit of a whimp but arguable the most dangerous to upset. Generally very nice and helpful, weakest in combat. In love with Alita.​
    Agent 7 - Jeane - Age 20 - Survailence
    A shut in who's obsessed with games and anime. Unpredicatable, she does as she likes and is capable of tricking even the others into her schemes.​
    Agent 8 - Ken Yakata - 36 - Munitions Expert
    Possibly insane, he loves violence, guns, explosives, beer, and America. Extremely deadly with guns or explosives, to friend and foe alike.​
    Agent 9 - Nikoli Stalina - Age 19 - Military Discord
    A gruff abrasive man, doesn't know much outside of the battlefield and his default responses are to treat everything as such.​
    Agent 10 - Lucus - Age 22 - Abduction
    A lustful psychopath more than willing to rape or extort girls for sex. He is extremely cunning and capable despite his erratic behavior.​
    Agent 11 - Lin Yi - Age 21 - Deep Cover
    A normal lady, pretty well adjusted and enjoys a modern lifestyle. She's active and outgoing.​
    Agent 12 - Kortic - 14 - Assassination
    A hedonistic and sadistic child assassin who take pride in her work, willing to do anything to complete a job.​
     
  6. inverted_helix

    inverted_helix Well-Known Member

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    So I've been wondering if other people ever end up spending huge amounts of time dreaming up a world, and then realize they can't come up with a story to use it for?
     
  7. macdjord

    macdjord Well-Known Member

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    Adyen: Unless you want to get into free will/predestination paradox issues, it would have to be a famous person reincarnated as a nobody. If the character were reincarnated as somebody famous, they would know how their future is 'supposed' to go - and then either it does, raising issues of free will, or it doesn't, raising issues of how they've changed things.
     
    Adyen likes this.
  8. Reinhard Von Lohengramm

    Reinhard Von Lohengramm My comments are so edgy they'll make you bleed. Donator

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    I want to write a piece of original fiction "in the vein" of Worm, as in I want to write a whole load for free.

    Problem is, I don't know what to write. I have a fetish for ambitious long-haired pretty men like Reinhard and Griffith and I'm also an armchair general, go I wonder if I can go with a military sci-fi theme.

    Is there any premise that others want me to write?

    Right now, on my mind, I want to write about a character who commits suicide, only to find out that it is a reset button for his life.
     
  9. Master of Squirrel-fu

    Master of Squirrel-fu Étoile de l'Espée Moderator Subscriber Donator

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    Ministra Unending:

    Set in some undisclosed distant future, humanity ended up reaching beyond their own universe having found little in their own. In their hubris they broke the locks that kept not just their reality but all realities safe. Causality shattered and creatures from Outside invaded, beings larger than whole realities began to try and enter the kaleidoscope of worlds. During this time heroes rose, from the infinite worlds came infinite heroes to try and beat back the tides. Among them were the Five Holy Maidens, whom eventually traveled into the den of chaos that rested just outside the multiverse and sacrificed themselves forever seal off the multiverse. Though safe from the Great Ones the damage done was not disappeared, and holes still existed where the creatures tore reality in twain. Gaps between worlds. Earth itself, having been ground zero was knocked out of it's place and sent hurtling along a path between, passing and colliding with other versions of itself in it's mad spin.

    The story begins centuries later in one of the major cities having been rebuilt in the wake of the Great War. Thanks to the Warp centralizing government beyond city states and alliances is impossible as entire villages can often appear or disappear at random and even cities constantly shift as different versions of themselves layer upon each other. Any land outside of the Cities alter constantly, paths rarely ever staying the same. And monsters crawl from the shadows appearing from the aether itself. In this world, thanks to the influence of cultures of alternate versions of their city magics and sciences beyond counting flourish and heroes step up to fight back the tides of monsters.

    Magister, the name of the of heroes and Magistra the heroines, those who seek to defend their cities from the forces of darkness and evil. Beneath them are their juniors The Ministers and Ministra, boys and girls training to become heroes themselves. Fighting monsters, fighting crime, occasionally fighting each other. They are not a truly united force, divided into several major forces and many smaller ones there is much infighting for status and resources. Teams of Ministra compete against each other for rankings, Magisters and Magistra seek to advance themselves in their organizations, what was once a sacred duty eventually becomes just another career choice.

    The story follows the lives of several very different people in the City of New Alexandria:

    Rebecca Ito: A young girl who decided to Join the Ministra Corps as a part time job after finishing Mandatory Schooling. Given a generic power broach she bounty hunts Daemons in her district as Praelia Pugno Petra, a Fist weapon using Ministra. She is partnered with two other newbies, Arya Avicci aka Tela Vesti Linen Sew and Rus Urd, and is learning what it means to be a "Magical Girl".

    Cinque: A newly created member of the Legionettes, a union of clones of and created by the power of The Luminous Maiden whom are espers linked by a mental network. Having only been "Born" months ago and only just leaving the protection of her Big Sisters to gain experience about the world she has quite a bit to learn while working as a substitute Magical Girl for groups looking for temporary members.

    Midoriko: A 10 year veteran of the Ministra Corps, in charge of Maguca Beat a small and low ranking Ministra group made mostly of Ministra who were unwilling or unable to join other teams. For undisclosed reasons she never graduated from the Ministra Corps to a Magistra and thus is mocked by both for being a grown woman whom still uses a young girl's Power Up. She manages a team and acts as a surrogate mother for a few of them.

    Abigail O'rly: An intern at the Department of Extraplanier Transmigration whom had her simple life shattered when The Demon Queen decided freeload off her. The Maoh claims her to be the reincarnation of an old lover from a few millennia back and wishes to rekindle an old romance.

    Misha Caglietti: The Fairy Godmother, as in the Godmother of the local chapter of the Unsidhe Mafia. A young Mafia Princess promoted fairly young due to a coup gone wrong. While willing to live up to her duty she lacks the training as her late older sisters were meant to be the possible heirs. She does what she can to regain her Family's honor and power.
     
  10. OedonWrithe

    OedonWrithe Yharnam Optometrist

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    All right. I have a world with 200 years of approximate history where it diverges from our own and I've had the world in my mind for a good 5 or so years. My main thing is that I don't want it to turn into a thing like Bloodborne -- I don't want the story to become about how the setting came to be, even though the story leads to uncovering vast conspiracies and does unveil stuff that, if revealed to the rest of society would be catastrophic. But it's more like... the main character just starts learning the connections she has to these events...

    Okay actually thank you for letting me talk to myself. I've figured out what my problem was. The problem with Bloodborne was that there wasn't any forward goal or potential future for the setting. It was dead. Done. My setting has a future and a fight for that future so I think I was angsting over a non-issue.

    The only work I need to do now before I start REALLY writing is I need to set up a sort of bestiary thing for my own made up terminology regarding ghosts.

    My best description of the premise is currently "bureaucratic military-organized modern day Witchers." Except it is really a lot more complex than that. My big holdup has been doing my best not to info-dump too much. I'm gonna list at the end of this the stuff that should have been picked up on by the end of this snip and I'd like if someone told me if they picked up on those facts.

    So, uh, here's part of the first chapter of the first book of Paranormal Marionette.



    "About time he proposed. How long’s it been? Three years?”

    The driver snorted and as the light turned green, she hit the gas. “Five, actually,” she corrected.

    “Five, huh?” Her partner, Linda, mused, relaxing back in her seat. It took a few moments for the other shoe to drop. She bolted up straight, eyes wide. “Wait, five? You mean… the both of you… while we were still in school…?!”

    A smirk reached Eliza's face, wiped away quickly as she returned her focus to the road. Traffic in Kiev was killer this week, likely because the senators were coming in to campaign with elections coming up. Wherever a senator went came the entirety of their retinue, and Kiev campaign festivals usually brought in considerable tourism. Great. That meant festival demonstrations and patrols on top of the already burgeoning workload.

    “Yeah. We kept it discreet, though.”

    Linda, predictably, was having a small meltdown. “I mean... You would've been eighteen but...! How-- what-- did Anderson know?”

    Eliza shook her head. “I think he had an idea, but you know him. Probably didn’t care as long as we kept quiet. That, and Cecilia could have had a talk with him.”

    “His mom was in on it?!” the brunette squeaked.

    “Where do you think I went over the summer? Back to the Springs? Cecilia let me stay at her place.”

    Unbuttoning the top button of her uniform, Linda flopped back in her seat. “I need a drink. I can’t believe you had an affair with your teacher -- living at his house -- without me noticing.”

    The dark-skinned driver laughed, turning onto Dykans’kyi Lane, making it back into a district that managed to retain the original Ukrainian street names. These were never fun, what with her job forcing her to slowly adopt Enochian as a primary language. With Latin as a first and Ukrainian at a shaky second, three alphabets and a multitude of languages constantly shifting in and out of usage around her as she navigated the city, it was no surprise that the borders started to blur.

    “It’s not like we were doing anything -- oh, for crying out loud.” She pulled to stop in front of some jerkwad’s lousy parking job. The street was thin -- practically an alley -- and this guy had parked his car to take up enough room for two.

    Eliza looked ahead, but no viable space was in sight. She shrugged and flexed a mental muscle. The offending white sedan lifted a centimeter or so off the ground and kindly slid over to make room.

    Cracking her neck from the casual telekinetic strain, she brought the car in order to park parallel in the newly-opened spot.

    After turning off the engine, she checked herself in the rearview mirror. A couple smoothed over lapels and hairflips later, she got out of my black, nondescript government issued car.

    “Fix your uniform, Lin,” Eliza reminded her as she locked the car behind them.

    Lin's bright red lips pouted in protest but she did anyway, adjusting her mini-cape and making sure her tasteful crown of braids was in order before scooping up a worn out pink stuffed bunny and hugging it to her chest.

    The house in front of us was an older number, a nice red brick three-story… at least, she thought it was three stories. The top window could just be an attic or some fancy sunroom shenanigans.

    Eliza pushed open the gate and let Lin walk through before they approached the door. Her badge holder -- including her government certification and Lin’s combat and communication license -- was in her hand before she rang the doorbell. “Guardsmen,” she announced twice -- once in Ukrainian and again in Enochian -- loud and clear, enough so that any neighbors could make sure to keep their children inside or evacuate if they so choose.

    A few moments passed, reaching almost a minute before she could hear the telltale sound of at least four locks and latches coming undone. A thin man opened the door, eyes sunken and searching as he peered out. “Y-Yes?”

    Eliza showed him the badge and their papers, not that it did any better to ease his nerves to see the Imperial seal all over everything. She held back a sigh. “Mister Sewick, this is Guardsmen Medium Linda Sharp. I am Elizabetha Thompson, her attending Exorcist. We’ve received reports of a spiritual disturbance. May we come in?” It wasn’t like she actually needed to ask permission -- in fact, they were typically advised to be as forceful and inquisition-like as possible -- but she didn’t want to give the poor man a heart attack.

    He nodded vigorously. “Yes, yes, please, my wife was just making tea,” he stammered out, opening the door fully and letting the two of them in.

    As he did, the mid-morning sun hit his pendant and made it shine. Eliza's golden gaze flicked to it and she couldn’t stop her eyes from widening in recognition.

    Sewick noticed and panic set in, his calloused hand reaching up to hide his rosary. “I-It belonged to my mother, I- I swear, I only keep it because--”

    Damn it. If this was another call because someone saw a cross or some other Judeo-Christian symbol and mistook it for some sort of spooky scary spirit talisman, she was going to level the PR department. Keeping people frightened and aware was one thing, but wasting valuable time was a whole other matter. This wasn’t the first time someone got scared about this sort of thing in front of her. She held up a pair of placating hands.

    Unfortunately, Eliza didn’t think that through. He flinched, stumbling back from her in fear. She'd already declared she was an Exorcist; of course he’d shy away from a hyper-powerful telekinetic raising their hands at him.

    With no sudden movements, Eliza lowered her hands and stepped into the house far enough to let Lin close the door behind them. “Mister Sewick, I’m fully aware that your faith has nothing to do with the Lacuna. I had a traditional Christian upbringing, myself. Please, sir, the sooner we have your cooperation, the sooner we can resolve this issue.”

    The young Exorcist did her initial cursory scan, a little surprised to see faded areas on the wall, as if something had recently been removed. The shape made her think they kept crosses. Her heart sunk at the thought of people being so scared that they stripped precious keepsakes from their walls in fear of prosecution.

    A new voice entered the conversation. “Oh, little cambion girl says she got raised properly. Where would someone like you get an upbringing like that?”

    Mrs. Sewick had come in from the kitchen, tray of freshly brewed tea in her hands. She was rounder than her husband, but still almost shockingly thin. Eliza noted her aged visage showed light signs of the pox as her gaze bore down on the government official, her eyes locked on the nubby demon horns that grew from Eliza's forehead.

    The half-demon's posture straightened. “Holy Springs, ma’am,” she answered, ignoring the darker memories mentioning it brought. "Latin is my first language."

    Mrs. Sewick turned her hard gaze towards Lin. “And what about you, girl? You don’t look like you’ve got mixed blood.”

    Lin, who had already started snooping around and going into business-mode, ignored her and lifted a cloth from a pile of neatly stacked decorative crosses. “What kind of talismans are these? They don’t have any spiritual charge.”

    Eliza pulled her charge away from the wall decorations. “Go put your nose to the ground somewhere else, Fido,” she deadpanned, pushing her dazed partner in a different direction.

    Lin wandered further into the house, whispering quietly to her stuffed rabbit.

    Turning back to the Sewicks, Eliza held back the urge to sigh. Exorcists as powerful as her were rare, but that didn't exempt her from the less glamorous parts of the job. Citizens were, for the most part, kept in the dark and fed Agency-approved propaganda. Thus, as the attending Exorcist, it was her job to keep suspects and victims calm and comfortable while a Medium swept the area for anomalies. This included kissing as much ass and being as compliant as possible. “Excuse my partner; her trances tend to be a bit deeper than average,” she apologized. “No, Guardsman Sharp is devoutly Alician. We’re not sure what she is, but you can rest assured she is cleared for duty. My partner's case was handled personally by High Inquisitor Lee, so you can expect the pinnacle of excellence."

    Mrs Sewick scowled. "I still want those things out of here as soon as possible. We don't welcome spirits in this house."

    The half-demon felt her teeth grind before she corrected her persona. "I assure you, my partner's Link is stable and well-tamed," She lied. Eliza allowed myself to partake in a cup of tea before shooing them out and assuming a stance in the center of the room. Granted, she didn't need to stand to meditate, but showing off every once in awhile did no harm.

    Her feet rooted to the floor, tailbone dropping as she took several deep breaths.

    She lifted her arms and slowly, slowly, brought her hands down to nest at her navel.

    A flare of energy washed over her, a bit irritated.

    "Sorry to keep you waiting," she said. "Do you feel something here?"

    Annoyance. Confusion. Frustration.

    "What? Is there something here or not?"

    Irritation. Indignance.

    "Are you telling me you don't know what it is?"

    Agreement. Frustration. Indignance.

    "Oh, the mighty spirit has finally been bested by one of its own. It is a dark day."

    Caution. Exasperation. Suspicion.

    That caught Eliza's attention more than her whining. "What do you suspect?"

    Amusement. Anticipation. Thirst.

    She suppressed a snort. "From you or the anomaly?"

    Agreement. Amusement.

    Amazing. Looks like the paperwork pile was going to be a mile high if this went where she expected it was. "You're the expert. Where do you want me? If it's going to poltergeist, you'll want me providing support on the physical plane."

    Hesitation. Caution. Trepidation.

    One foot in both sides until she figured out what was going on. Got it.

    "What's Lin's opinion?" Had to make sure to get that second opinion when working with her Link spirit.

    Dismissal. Annoyance. Eliza interpreted that as "we don't need your help."

    I grinded my teeth. "Heart, patch her through."

    Irritation. Hesitation. Compliance.

    The sharp presence of Linda's Link gave way to a gentler, benign aura.

    "Lin? Is she behaving?"

    A mental yawn stretched through the connection. "Mmm? Oh. Yeah. This house is weird, Liz. Activate a Tether and step into the Lacuna side. I think Miss Heart is freaking out," Lin reported. "I think I might be freaking out."

    Miss Heart? Freaking out? Eliza could understand Lin freaking out. In fact, she was pretty sure that unless Lin was piss drunk she was always freaking out in some capacity. Painfully aware -- that was the phrase. But Miss Heart, one of the most vicious and bloodthirsty Link spirits on duty, losing her cool up against anything or anyone that wasn't Anderson? Something was up.

    Eliza retrieved a short, rune-covered rod from her belt. A push of a button revealed a small needle which she jammed into her thigh, drawing blood. The runes glowed a radiant blue as she dropped the Tether to the floor where it remained upright. She tested it, kicking it lightly with a foot to knock it over. It righted itself immediately, vibrating with the strength of Eliza's aura.

    The anchor was a bit weak for her standards, but it would suffice. She grabbed another length of rune-covered metal from my belt and flicked the switch, sending a needle into her thumb. Springs expanded the device into a glowing blue quarterstaff, about three-fourths her height.

    The blood conducted spiritual energy along the staff, humming with power as she closed her eyes and stepped into the Lacuna.

    Her stomach churned, nausea hitting before she even opened her eyes. It didn't get any better when she did.

    "Oh, what the fuck, guys."

    Writhing tendrils replaced the walls and creeped along the crumbling stone floors, oozing and covering the floor with a layer of sticky black blood. The centerpiece of the whole scene was a man -- or what was left of him -- hanging from the ceiling by his limbs like some sort of horror game monster. His eyes were blank, white with only a black, hollow circle for his pupils. An inhumanly wide mouth hung open, the black ectoplasmic fluids falling from his face in streams and globs like some sort of ghost syrup.

    The Sewicks' spiritual projections -- almost unsurprisingly at this point -- were strung up in the wall-tentacles, the filthy guck siphoning over their faces to leak into any hole it could find.

    Lin was there, too, but instead of being tangled up she was futilely slicing through the tentacles with her giant, ornate scythe, trying to free the Sewicks from their prison. "I can't get them loose!" She shouted as she sensed her partner's presence. "Do your Exorcist thing!"

    A shudder went through her whole body. Happy twenty-third birthday, Eliza, have a giant, ectoplasm-happy tentacle monster!

    The condition of Lin's Link made Eliza do a double take. Goo had crusted over the massive blade's intricate details, more flowing over and adding to it with each effortless swing. Lin shouted in frustration, slamming the incongruously dainty weapon repeatedly into the muck until the suction proved too much. She pressed a foot against the wall for leverage and tried to pull it free, but the thin haft was too slick.

    "Lin! Be careful!" Eliza called.

    "I got it!" Lin retorted as she continued to tug.

    The spirit turned its ponderous gaze towards the struggling Medium for a moment before carelessly swatting her aside with a tendril, slamming her into the opposite wall and integrating her into the teeming mass. The scythe faded, disintegrating back into its inactive form -- a stuffed rabbit -- and joining Lin in the sticky mess.

    Eliza scowled. Lin was almost certainly uninjured, but now she'd lack backup for a hostile ghost.

    "That hurt me," it groaned, words distorted by the waterfall of ghost goo. "You're mean." It returned its bizarre eyes to the remaining Guardsman. "What manner of spirit are you, Golden One?"

    Eliza straightened her posture, assuming a military-trained stance. "I am Guardsmen Exorcist Thompson, sir, and I regret to inform you that your presence here is in violation of several Inquisitorial laws--" she didn't get to finish.

    "Eeeexorcist? Guardsmen? Inquisition?" It echoed. It's face scrunched up. "Inquisition. Inquisitor." Then it twisted, body contorting against its bindings with pain and fear.

    It screamed, which wasn't quite the correct word. Roars ripped out from all sides, an exclamation of desperation and terror. For a moment, it was so intense that Eliza thought the Tether was going to pull her out.

    "You've been sent to kill me!" It bellowed.

    Eliza tumbled away from the incoming tentacle, watching as it slammed into the space she had just vacated, sending black ichor flying and adding new cracks to the dilapidated floor.

    "I knew you'd come! She sent you, didn't she?"

    She flipped back and evaded another strike, this time planting a hand on top of the slimy appendage and vaulting over, launching steel-toes boots into its face.

    It howled as its face sizzled from impact.

    Normally, such an attack would do very little, but knowing my tendency to kick ghosts into submission, she'd commissioned a pair of boots with runes etched into the hidden steel. The results could be easily viewed on this freak's bubbling face.
    "It hurts! It hurts! Maaaamaaaa!"

    It wasn't rare for a violent spirit to call for their mamas, but it still gave Eliza pause every time...

    ... Which was why she failed to dodge when the next tentacle pinned her to the ground.

    She swore as she felt something crack -- a rib, most likely -- and jabbed a small rune knife from her concealed wristband into the slimy flesh. It sizzled as the skin around the blade boiled, the tentacle recoiling away in pain.

    Eliza tumbled back, ignoring the pain as bone grinded against itself. She swore again, swiftly and under her breath while she fumbled around her belt to find the right tool.

    "Yoooouuu... I didn't see it before, but after tasting the Red One... You're both like me, aren't you?" It laughed, loud and disturbed enough to make the Exorcist pause and look. His face had twisted upward, stretching in an unnatural euphoria. "Hooowww cruel and fitting!"

    Another tendril came at her from the side, but this time she was ready and batted it away with her staff. The runes left marks like burns on the ectoplasm-covered hide, but the monster had stopped caring. Tendrils made grabs at her, only to get repelled by rune-marked bits of metal while she fought the larger appendages.

    All it took was one slip on the slick floor to give it an opening. Tentacles wrapped around her body, squeezing tight and binding her arms to her sides. The rune staff went clattering to the floor, leaving Eliza unarmed.

    The Exorcist reached out a mental muscle, snatching up the rod with her mind, but before it reached her a tentacle slammed down on top of it. It writhed in agony as the blessed metal seared it's wicked flesh, but it stayed out out of sheer willpower.

    With a gurgling sound, the lump in the wall where Linda had been absorbed began to move upward. The lump came to a stop above the suspended spirit as a gargantuan mouth erupted from its back in a burst of black goop.

    "I'm going to eaaaaat you, little Exorcist. Then... I'll be sooooo powerful... Even she won't be able to kill me!"

    Eliza stared at the thing in disbelief. It... It was actually serious?

    In spite of the pain, she laughed.

    It visibly was thrown off by this. "What--"

    A flash of red was the only warning it received before huge black blade swiped through and severed its support tendrils, causing the spirit to collapse down into its own piles of ectoplasmic goo.

    "Trickery! No fair! No fair!" It screamed.

    Lin fell from the ceiling, landing firmly on the spirit's back with an audible squelch. Despite severe shortness of breath, she brought her scythe down to pin the spirit to the ground.

    The room's constant motion had ceased now that the ghost had disconnected from his limbs. Eliza retrieved her rune staff and approached it, flipping the weapon so the rune-laden end faced the spirit's head. With the flick of a wrist, an audio recorder floated up into her hand. "If you would kindly state your name for filing purposes."

    "Go fuck yourself, demon whore," it moaned.

    She frowned. "Casper Doe, then. Technically humanoid, but clearly Grudgekin. Emophage." She nodded to Lin.

    Lin's scowl deepened as she swung her blade, the spirit disintegrating the moment the reddish-black metal passed through its neck.

    "Exorcised," Eliza concluded, flicking the switch on the recorder.

    They dropped out of the Lacuna, falling back into the Sewicks' living room. Furniture and trinkets were flung all across the room -- a consequence of the spirit poltergeisting. The couple was nowhere to be seen, but if they survived, they would see a marked increase in their quality of life now that they no longer had a spirit feeding off their emotions.

    Lin looked up. "That was the opposite of fun."

    Eliza grimaced. She hadn't expected it to be strong enough to land a hit on her -- let alone on Lin. Plus, all that drivel about the three of them being the same rubbed her wrong. Of course, spirits were known to spout nonsense, sure, but this...
    The Exorcist coughed and the pain reminded her of her broken ribs. Damn.

    With help from her telekinesis, she peeled Lin off the floor.

    "Ugh, my head--"

    "Shh, you have Advil in the car."

    Lin staggered to her feet, Miss Heart clutched at her side. Thankfully, her glasses had survived this incursion. "I don't need Advil, I need alcohol. A lot of alcohol."



    Here's what I tried to get across in this:
    • Christianity is no longer the major religion in the world and is treated much the way that Islam is our world. There's a whole new religion instead.
    • Eliza is black. She's also cambion -- half-demon -- and this is not an abnormal thing for people to be.
    • People are scared of the government, but mostly of ghosts.
    • Lin has some really huge problems
    That's about it. Other than the fact that there's a separate plane called the Lacuna where most ghosts dwell and they can indirectly influence mortals through it. Thank you if you read this far. I'm super grateful.
     
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  11. OedonWrithe

    OedonWrithe Yharnam Optometrist

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    *coughs a little bit* that setting is remarkably similar to mine in your first couple of sentences there. I got kinda nervous for a second.

    Also I know you didn't ask for advice, but I'd like to give my input based on my own experiences. Either choose one main character out of that cast (keep the others and KNOW their backgrounds but keep it to yourself and use their actions to build the world and their pasts to make it feel more alive) or divide it up into different books or short stories. The Night World books by L.J. Smith come to mind. Loosely connected stories that could stand as light novels on their own but could also easily be bound in collections.

    All of those characters look freaking amazing and I actually really want to read Abigail O'rly's story once it's written. I'd love to see some sort of romance in some of them (hopefully all of them even if it doesn't work out for them). I see so much potential in this, like, my mouth is watering over it.
     
  12. OedonWrithe

    OedonWrithe Yharnam Optometrist

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    So this is a direct continuation off of the previous snip of Paranormal Marionette.




    The Exorcist coughed and the pain reminded her of her broken ribs. Damn.

    With help from her telekinesis, she peeled Lin off the floor.

    "Ugh, my head--"

    "Shh, you have Advil in the car."

    Lin staggered to her feet, Miss Heart clutched at her side. Thankfully, her glasses had survived this incursion. "I don't need Advil, I need alcohol. A lot of alcohol."

    Sighing, Eliza left a notice for the Sewicks informing them that the job was complete and listing the services rendered. It would be up to the Agency to decide whether or not they would receive a bill for it all.

    In that time, Linda had found the old couple huddled up unconscious in a cabinet beneath the stairs. Spooked by the poltergeisting -- objects flying around did little to calm most people -- they'd hidden and likely passed out due upon the emophage's demise. The thing had been connected to them like a leech and from its state of entrenchment it had likely been eating their positive emotions for quite some time.

    Eliza pulled out her cell phone and made sure the correct people were aware of the situation before she herded Linda back to the car.
    Lin went to get in the passenger's side.

    "Nope. You're driving," Eliza said.

    "What? I was like... eaten by that thing. I shouldn't be driving."

    "It broke my ribs, Lin. I can feel it poking my lungs."

    That shut her up. "Hospital?"

    The Exorcist nodded. "Hospital."


    ooo


    "So what are they saying, sweetheart?"

    Eliza shifted the phone to her other ear, trying not to get the cord tangled up with her IV tubes as she skimmed through the pile of paperwork they'd dropped off for her. "I apparently grazed a lung. No punctures or anything -- they just want me off active duty for two months to reduce the risk of breaking the bone again and actually doing serious damage. The only reason I'm even still here is because some genius wants to make sure I don't start hemorrhaging or something."

    "How horrible!"

    On the other end of the line, Cecilia Michaels fended off a gaggle of interns and shut the door behind her. Finally, a quiet office in which to talk to her future daughter-in-law. The olive-skinned mother of a twenty-something teacher perched in a high-backed chair behind mountains of letters and forms, bills and proposals. She took a moment to straighten her headscarf, making sure the supple silk covered her twisted ram horns.

    "Yeah, the doctor has something against Guardsmen. Or at least our lack of respect for employee safety codes. I don't see how they expect any downtime to be viable. You know better than anyone: it is campaign season," came Eliza's dry snark.

    Sipping a mug of coffee, the senator logged into her email and immediately checked for messages from her favorite headmaster. Unfortunately, it looked like he hadn't gotten back to her since earlier that morning. Still, something he'd mentioned stuck out at her. "Y'know, Eliza, Faye was telling me about how he'd sent in a request for enhanced security detail. I know you can't sit still, so maybe that's your chance. An easy job in a familiar place."

    Eliza snorted. "The doctors implied I was supposed to relax. Being around Anderson and Duemmel is the opposite of relaxation."

    Mama Michaels grinned. "I could get Mavro to take you on as his teaching assistant," she cooed. "With all the accolades that includes."

    A flash of fantasy fluttered in the front of the young Exorcist's mind. A free period. No students. His desk. His hands...! Eliza suppressed a shudder.
    "You're naughty."

    The senator laughed. "Tell me something I don't know, sweetheart."

    A knock at the door made Cecilia pause. Damn, did she have appointments already? "Eliza, sugar-sweetie-baby-bear, I'm gonna have to let you get back to your paperwork."

    They exchanged a few further pleasantries while Cecilia leaned to try to see her visitor through the blinds of her office window. All she saw was a single shocking lock of light blond -- enough to make her stiffen. Cecilia's hands shook as she hung up on Mavro's fiancée, her face losing its color. "Come in," she choked out.

    The door cracked open with a quiet squeak. A pair of horns similar to a gazelle peaked through first before a perfect political face joined them. Big brown eyes twinkled with excitement. "Senator! I was wondering if you'd forgotten about me!" she sang.

    Cecilia swallowed, but her mouth had gone dry. "Cordelia, I'd never forget you."

    The tiny lion-like woman slid into a comfortable chair and crossed her legs, an action barely noticeable beneath the heavy layers of her imperial regalia. She had every trait of an ideal Inquisitor: sharp eyes, imposing features, all while being small enough to engage in stealth. Not that a woman of Cordelia Lee's standing would ever need to perform field work, no, the station of High Inquisitor proved itself a passive one that held the Emperor's ear, administrative command of the Guardsmen Agency, and far too much legal freedom.

    Lee pulled a file from inside her jacket and began reading it over while Cecilia watched. A full minute or so passed before the Inquisitor snapped it shut. "We are on the cusp of one of the most perilous campaign seasons I've ever seen. Cultists and terrorists will take any foothold they're given, any chance to strike at the government that keeps them in line. Faye Anderson," she scowled, saying the name like a bad word, "has opposed me at every step, like he thinks pre-dating the Conformity makes him special."

    Cecilia flinched.

    Folding her fingers together, the Inquisitor continued. "As someone so... intimate with John Bell Academy, perhaps you can clear something up for me. Why does Faye motherfucking Anderson think his school needs my precious Guardsmen?"

    The senator gripped the arms of her chair and looked Lee in the eyes. "You're afraid of cultists and terrorists? The academy is a supernatural hotspot. My late husband's experiments left the entire property as stable as a powderkeg, and you're asking why?"

    Cordelia's look of disgust deepened. "From my understanding, the staff had the instabilities under control. What changed?"

    Senator Michaels' eyes flickered down. Her lips pulled back to reveal her teeth as she fought against tears of frustration. She spoke, the sound barely there. "My son."

    Lee raised a brow. "Pardon?"

    "My son," she repeated, defeat and shame clear in her wavering voice.

    Cordelia's eyes narrowed in realization as her fingers tightened on the file in her hands.

    The Inquisitor cleared her throat and pulled a pen from her jacket. "Very well. I see that situation's coming to a head, then. However, the Guardsmen are coming from your detail--"

    Cecilia inhaled sharply. "Medium Sharp and Exorcist Thompson."

    Lee's hand paused over the half-open file. "A Medium and an Exorcist? Usually Reapers are more suited for security purposes, especially against the threat you've alluded to."

    The senator glared. "It's time Eliza learned about her family. I'd hoped she would have connected better with him while she was there, but I've been told they barely spoke."

    Cordelia hummed and let pen meet paper as she added her powerful, world-changing signature to the necessary forms. "And I agree that -- as such a unique case -- Guardsman Sharp should remain with her Exorcist. Very well, Senator. John Bell Academy will be receiving two professional Guardsman as security detail for the duration of the campaign season." With that, High Inquisitor Cordelia Lee stood and left without a single word.

    The sound of the door shutting behind her made Cecilia flinch.

    She couldn't believe Cordelia had gone along with that. So many years of refusing backup to John Bell Academy, of hiding her disdain behind excuses of the building's hauntings being anchored to whatever. Cecilia didn't understand much of the fancy vocabulary; she just knew from experience and Faye's feedback that most of what Lee said to her was a load of bologna. They knew which ghost had the others anchored. It was just a matter of getting him to pass on that was too complex of a problem for six Guardsman teachers, several Normals, and a bunch of students to handle.

    Cecilia buried her face in her hands. It hurt. The stable hauntings weren't the only hassle they faced. The entire school sat on a weakened barrier, the space between the Middle Plane and the Lacuna left as only a thin veil after the incident so many years ago. Spirits would make their way through -- often to their doom as it was a Guardsmen school. But even against such formidable obstacles as Headmaster Faye Anderson or Professor Maura Duemmel, students still ended up dead.

    And it was all her fault.


    ooo



    Karina usually didn't stay up so late. One of the housekeepers had already come through and declared lights out, but instead of clambering into the bunk above her sister, the young nephilim sat in front of a makeshift vanity comprised of a propped-up hand mirror and a desk lamp.

    The problem with having angelic heritage was that everyone looked the same. Hair color ran a gamut from snowy white to gunmetal grey. Eyes -- and they could have any number of those -- were purple, grey, or blue. Everyone had thin, delicate little faces and it was a miracle if someone had a trait other than extra eyes to distinguish them.

    In a school filled with exotic faeries and diverse demons, half-angels blended into an indistinguishable blob of grey and pastel.
    Karina's issue was two-fold. A nephilim and a twin, she fought everyday to be noticed, to be seen as herself and not just half of the Polzin twins.

    She realized a little too late that false eyelashes were a horrible idea when you have four eyes. The lashes on her lower ocelli jabbed her main set every time she opened them and the resultant tears were ruining her cheap, bargain-store eyeshadow.

    "Dammit," Karina hissed, setting down the applicator and plucking a wipe from the pile of goodies.

    If she couldn't get herself to stand out, she'd never get her abilities as an Exorcist noticed. The base level professor could barely even remember her name, let alone her accomplishments. If only she could convince them she had potential; Karina could get transferred into Professor Michaels' class and at least be able to get the time of day from people.

    Karina leaned in towards the mirror, trying to clean away the gunk from her reddening, swelling eyes. Great, she had an allergy on top of everything.

    A swirl of movement in her reflection made her freeze.

    Her irises -- all four of them -- split, a spiral of black twisting inwards until it met the pupils.

    Karina dropped the cloth, the wet thud becoming the last thing she heard before her world went black.




    So this is the rest of chapter one, which might end up being cut from the final version altogether because it doesn't contribute to the plot.
     
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