"I suppose that depends on what you mean by 'deal with'."
"Ego management."
Still feeling frustrated by Cranius, OL?
"No." He shakes his head, eyes dropping momentarily to his glass. "I came close to needing to have a word with Starman about his… Relationship, but he did the right thing before it got that far."
"Oh. I wasn't sure that you knew about that."
Which Starman? The alien one? I suppose he
might have been controversial back in the day...
He shrugs. "Like I said, he ended it before it went any further. I didn't have any reason to bring it up with anyone. And that was still true after Interceptor brought it up in front of Dinah, because that was a parallel universe. How did you know about it?"
"Found the private detective's notes."
That must have taken some serious digging. I doubt the guy had digital copies anywhere...
"Huh." He makes an amused exhalation. "I'm surprised they were still intact."
"I didn't say that finding them was easy. But you never had to deal with anyone like Cranius?"
To be fair, OL... The sort of super-science Cranius works with would have been considered supervillainy.
"That's a fairly niche set of motives. Didn't..? His eyes narrow in through. "Didn't Batman fight someone like that? Professor… Pig?"
"Doctor Valentin turned people into living dolls under his control. It's… Really not the same thing." Hm. "Unless the person in question wanted to be a doll, I suppose. But even then, there's no improvement in function. It's more like… When Doctor Crane had his brain transplanted from his Robotman body into Charles Grayson's body."
...The same Robotman body from Doom Patrol? Impressive.
He looks contemplative for a moment. "Huh. Yeah, I guess it is. I only spoke to him a few times afterwards, but I do remember him being a whole lot more cheerful about life."
"He never said anything about building robot bodies for anyone else?"
OL, most people don't want to be a super-powered cyborg. And if it has bad drawbacks, then it's understandable.
"No. There wasn't a whole lot of demand for it."
"Really? No polio patients stuck in iron lungs who were interested in giving it a try?"
If you've got technology that can transfer brains, what's to stop you making artificial lungs anyway?
"Ah… Don't take this the wrong way, Paul, but most people like being as human as they can be. Crane spent about twenty years totally numb to all sensation. And that was after… For a while after he first got put in that thing, he kept getting phantom sensations in body parts he didn't have anymore. And he had a lot of trouble sleeping… I suppose I don't know if it was better or worse than an iron lung, but I can understand people not exactly being eager."
See? Drawbacks from heck. You'd have to be a strange person indeed to
enjoy that.
"But Morrow already had realistic robot skin back then. If he combined the two, and maybe made a robot body with slightly more human proportions, it would have been much better."
Sure, but that means working with
T.O.Morrow. Most people aren't that desperate.
"Except that he couldn't. Morrow was… Well, he was a lot of things, but he was definitely a genius. Crane could hit harder than most people because his body was made of metal. A lot of his joints weren't actually all that strong. One time, he clocked a regular guy across the jaw and needed to replace one of his fingers afterwards. If he was gunna do what you said, he's probably be better getting Morrow to design the whole thing and just let him and Grayson handle the surgery and the interface." He chuckles quietly. "And if supervillains did things like that without someone walking them through it, you'd be a whole lot less busy."
Yes, because they wouldn't
need to be supervillains. Sadly, their egos get in the way of simpel money-making. It's the Sauron (Marvel) classic: "I don't
want to cure Cancer. I want to make dinosaur people!"
"Ah, not right now."
I take a moment to look around the restaurant. Things are… Well, before the Broadcast I get the impression that this was a medium tier restaurant. The menu would be written in French, but they'd include a translation without sniffing at you. Now… They've had to rewrite their menu based on what's available, and the near-collapse of the currency means that things are a good deal more plebeian.
It's probably had quite the humbling effect on the culinary snobs of the world, certainly.
I sip my apple juice, and-.
Bring-bring! Bring-bring!
Isn't it always the way? Just getting a chance to relax, and someone calls...
Alan and I both check our rings.
"It's me. Hello?"
Amusing that they use the same ringtone.
"Did you put Guy up to this?"
"Hello Beatriz, lovely to hear from you."
Well, that's a hell of a thing to start a conversation with. care to unpack that cryptic statement?
"Yes, yes, hello. Did you?"
"I've had an influence on Guy for a while. What exactly are you talking about?"
Definitely a positive influence. Whatever Bea might think.
"Do you know about… His… Family?"
"Ah, that's still not very precise, but probably. And I know that he runs an anger…" Huh. "Management class. Has he..?"
Oh, no. He didn't suggest she enrol, did she?
"Said I should come along? Yes."
"Well, it's almost certainly an honest attempt to help, because he's been in the same sort of situation. And I didn't put him up to it, as you put it. Oh, and I mentioned the tidying up thing, let me know how that goes."
You do understand that not everyone reacts
reasonably when someone suggests they have a problem?
"You really didn't put him up to it?"
"You.. know that Guy used to work as a prison therapist, right? His job was helping people serving custodial sentences get their heads on straight. If he's offered to help you, then it's a serious offer."
So yes, he
is a professional.
Better than Black Canary, that's for sure.
"So you've given up on curing me."
Ah… "What's Norway's position on marijuana legalisation?"
"Prescription only."
Why do I get the feeling 'blazing up' would take on a more literal meanign with her?
"Well, there's… That." Oh. "Or I know a specialist in metahuman medicine, but last time he worked on someone who could manipulate fire, they ended up without a head."
"That's supposed to be an expert?"
...OL, do not think of suggesting she meet Cranius!
"He re-engineered their body so that they wouldn't need a head after they received a fatal head injury. The result.. isn't pretty, but it's functional. He's good, but he likes doing radical transformations."
"I'll make that my fourth option."
...That
high? Then again, she probably doesn't have many options yet.
"Alright. Any news on the search?"
"No. Has the Justice League heard anything?"
They'd certainly be better placed to aggregate information, for a start, yes...
"Too much. With medicine production and transportation well below normal levels, there are quacks all over the place."
"'Quacks'?"
Ever seen old cowboy movies with the typical 'travelling medicine salesman' type?
"Fraudsters. Fakes. We can't find the one you're looking for because there are too many. I'll let you know-."
"Hang on, I've got another call."
...Boy, she's not big on basic phone etiquette, is she? Taking another call while she's talking to someone she called?
...And she put OL on
hold?
I frown, and Alan raises his eyebrows. "Is there a problem?"
"She had another caller. I'm on-"
Such is the modern generation, I suppose.
Beep.
"He proposed?!"
"-hold."
Well... I guess Guy and Tora deserve congratulations.
