31 - Doubt, Part Three
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CCClover
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31. Doubt, Part Three
Trias' head spun with all that Uriel had told him.
He did not know how the Seraphim could speak of such things so casually. His whole existence, Trias had known nothing but the endless war between Light and Dark. How many had given everything in that conflict? Entire cities ravaged in blazes of hellfire, countless dead, endless sacrifice…all for a victory that, apparently, the Seraphic Council did not consider a victory at all. There might be more worlds, with more battles to be fought. How many? How many lifetimes would the war go on…?
But, in truth, none of that seemed to matter. He could still feel her in the back of his mind. Teralel, her body wracked by pain. There could be a billion wars waiting for him, but right now that was all he could think about.
Trias knew exactly where he was going. And so he found himself back in the same old place. Standing before the vortex of light where evil itself lay imprisoned. And it was not long before the voice of the Enemy came to him.
"So," the Heart of Darkness purred. "You want something from me. Don't you, Trias?"
"No," Trias lied.
The Dark One was in a fine mood today. "Tut tut. It will not do for an angel to lie, not here. You've been hanging around me too often, I think. Will you make me guess?"
All at once, Trias felt pathetic. How had he ever stood before the Great Enemy with pride and scorn on his lips? How had he ever had so much faith in Heaven's design? "You…you cannot know," he said feebly. "You…you cannot touch my mind…"
Suddenly an icy cold washed over him, and even here, standing before the torrent of light that was the Dark One's prison, gloom seemed to settle in.
"Don't you listen, Trias?" the Great Enemy hissed with the voice of a thousand damned souls. "I don't need to touch your mind to know what you're thinking. As if it weren't obvious. Oh, you're so very upset, aren't you? Here's my guess: your little Teralel has run into trouble on the hunt. Captured, perhaps. And now you've come to me to plead for mercy on her behalf. Well, I don't know if I could win her a reprieve, even if I wanted to. I don't know whether Malak or Cara would still obey my orders."
Trias was taken aback. Was it so obvious that this was what he came here for? Was his heresy so plain? "I…you…you would never order them to stand down, in any case."
"How little you know me, Trias. I would. On some conditions, of course. I mean, I don't expect to be freed, but you know it's pretty sparse inside this crystal, right? I could use some better accommodations. A chalkboard. A chair. Something to read, at least. So, they did capture her, huh?"
Trias hesitated. Oh, he shouldn't be speaking to the Enemy, he knew it, deep in his bones he knew it, but…when Heaven denied him, what was he supposed to do? "I…I don't know. I don't think so. All I know is that she is in pain…"
"Well, go pull her bacon out of the fire, then. You're her Luminary, right? Isn't she your responsibility?"
Sudden rage flooded Trias' thoughts. But it was not the righteous fury he was so familiar with. This was a rage that tossed him about like a boat in the midst of a tempest; a rage he could not control. "Yes," he roared, and the whirlpool of light before him wavered. "I want to, don't you think I want to? But it is the…the judgment of Heaven that no one risks themselves for her!"
There was a moment of silence as his rage echoed through the sacred halls, and for a moment Trias believed he'd receive no answer. But then the Dark One spoke again.
"Ooh, that's rough, buddy. Well, that's Heaven for ya. So, what, are they just going to leave her there? I mean, I guess it makes sense in a way. If Malakar and Carassiso beat your angel, that means they found a way to beat Uriel's seal, too. No point sending good angels after bad, right?"
"It was not her fault! She was…unready, thrown into a task far beyond her!"
"Sure, sure," said the Dark One soothingly. "Only…look, that's just how Seraphim think of things. You can understand, surely? You were a soldier, in a war. They need to make long-term decisions. Teralel was a scout, and sometimes scouts don't come back. That's all."
If the words were meant to be comforting, they achieved the opposite effect. They cut Trias to the bone, precisely because they seemed so reasonable. He had said much the same thing countless times throughout his long life. How many had died because he gave similar orders, under the exact same rationale? Shouldn't he have been ready for the same to happen to Teralel? Only, now…
"Or maybe you don't like that idea." The dark one's voice was a mocking whisper in his ear. "Maybe you want some special treatment. Maybe, when it comes right down to it, you cared for this Teralel of yours just a little bit more than was proper for a Luminary. Not that you'd ever let it slip, of course. And who could blame you…? A Luminary is very close with their subordinate. You saw her through all the way to the end of the war. She seemed…young, for an angel, from what I saw of her. Perhaps you cherished the idea of knowing that her heart would be unstained by the endless battles. Perhaps you thought that, in a world without war, you might get to bask in the sweet innocence of her spirit…just you and her…"
"Silence!" Trias cried. He had meant it to be a harsh bark of command, but instead it came out as an anguished cry. "Silence! Please, I beg you…"
"She was supposed to be safe. And now, she may be in the hands of two demon lords…and oh, if she is, they'll ruin her, Trias. She'll never be pure again."
"Silence!"
"You might prefer that she die. And perhaps she will. Perhaps you'll be granted that small mercy. All of this, and Heaven won't lift a finger to help. And you are powerless to do anything to save her. Utterly powerless."
Trias turned away and hid his face in shame. Teralel and her light filled all of his thoughts. Why had he been so harsh with her…? But he knew why. His anger had been a wall, a shield, and now…he had seen so much light extinguished throughout the years, but now the thought of hers going out was more than he could bear.
"I'm sorry, Trias," said the Dark One. "I just believe that you would be best served by hearing the unvarnished truth." A pause, then, which to Trias seemed to contain all his nightmares of what might be happening to Teralel, right that very moment. "There was one little lie in what I said, however," the Dark One continued. "You aren't completely powerless. If you could help me, I can help you."
"How?" Trias was surprised to hear his voice asking the question, and alarmed by how immediately it came. Yet why should he be so surprised? Deep down, didn't he know that was why he had come here at all? On the wild hope that some power opposed to Heaven might be the one to offer salvation from Heaven's harsh judgment? "How is it that you could help?"
"How. Yes, that is the issue, isn't it." The Dark One paused and let the enormity of what was being suggested really sink in. "Did you know, my dear Archangel, that time works differently within my prison than it does without? It runs much quicker in here. For me, centuries have passed between our little chats. It has left me with plenty of time to think. I told you before that I was a philosopher and a theoretician, didn't I? Well, as it turns out, when you're stuck in complete emptiness there's only so much philosophizing you can handle. So much for brains in a box and realms of perfect thought. You need outside stimulus."
Trias was practically dancing with frustration. "Speak quickly, and do not torment me! Anything could be happening…"
"Oh, cool your jets. A few moments aren't going to make the difference. Anyway, during the war I was always busy with, you know, the war stuff, which is why I fobbed off research on portaling onto Malakar. But with some time to think to myself, I believe I've puzzled a few things out. I could make a portal for you into this other world, Trias. And I would do it…if it weren't for the fact that I am, well, imprisoned. My power cannot touch the outside world."
"I will not free you," Trias said quickly, though even as he did he realized with wonder that he was not quite so certain this was the case. What was the Dark One, really, when Uriel had told him of how the world decayed even now, even when the war had been won? That even now the Seraphim still had visions of some dark force plaguing not just his world, but all others as well? Had the Great Enemy ever really been what to worry about…?
Or was Malakar, perhaps, the real threat?
"I'm not asking you to free me," said the Dark One. "Really, Trias. You couldn't even if you tried, you do realize that, right? My prison was constructed by the Seraphic Council itself. Yet I do not need to be freed in order to work my will. Just the tiniest crack in the prison, and I could help. But I cannot make it myself. The Seraphim know what they're doing; from the inside, this is quite impervious. But no Seal is perfect. From the outside, if you could just make just the smallest little fracture…."
Trias closed his eyes and reached out with his angelic power. The magical nature of the Dark One's prison appeared in his mind: seals upon seals upon seals, runes of terrible holy power, woven together into a box, so fine and perfect that it was the greatest marvel of divine magic that he had ever seen. For a moment, his power brushed against the prison's walls.
Then he recoiled. He could not really be considering this, could he? Oh, he was truly lost. "I…I cannot. It is too strong for me to do anything…"
"Ah. Well then, you're just as powerless to save Teralel as I initially thought. I have nothing to say to you, in that case. Good-bye!"
A silence fell, then, in which Trias was left alone with Teralel's pain.
"What would you do with that crack?" Trias whispered into that silence.
The voice of the Dark One returned, a thousand whispers in his head like an endless fall of leaves. "Come now, Trias. You aren't stupid. What do you think I'd do? I'd try to exploit it to free myself."
"So you are asking me to free you."
"No. I'm only asking for a chance. Look, you know you've got me over a barrel in this little tete-a-tete of ours, right? You can't free me, Trias. Whatever damage you can do to the prison, I know it won't be much, but it's the only chance I've got, right? And it's not even much of a chance, is it? There's nothing to stop you from going straight to the Seraphim after it's done, and they'll rush right over to repair it."
"Then why would you ever make such a deal…?" Trias asked.
"Well, what other chance would I ever have? Besides, even if it doesn't work out, I'll still have gotten the chance to fuck with them, right? I mean, you know that if you do this, you're screwed. Just being up front here. Even if the Seraphim repair my prison and there's no real harm done, they're going to come down on you hard. I'll get to claim I corrupted an archangel, even imprisoned as I am. I do have a certain mystique to maintain, after all."
Yes. Trias knew that was true, at least. The Seraphic Council would not forgive him, and…what would happen to him, in the end? Might he be exiled? Imprisoned himself? He did not know, and it did not matter. "How do I know you will keep your word?"
"The same way I'll know that you won't just go traipsing off to the Seraphim right away. I do want at least some chance to play with the damage you do, after all. I'll make the portal. You go through and see that I sent you to the right place. I'll keep the portal open for your return for as long as the Seraphim don't come to check on me. That way, I'll have the time to mess with the crack for as long as it takes you to go rescue Teralel. Of course, this is another bargain that heavily favors you. You might have another way to return and decide you don't need my portal back, so you tell the Seraphim right away. But I'm not exactly negotiating from a position of strength, here."
When the Dark One fell silent, Trias did not speak. For a few long moments, he simply floated there at the edge of the torrent of light, staring at the black speck in its center, where evil's heart was chained.
Then he flung his power against the Enemy's prison.
A deal with the Dark One? Trias could scarcely believe that he was doing this. He almost felt as though he were someone else, watching himself betray everything he had ever fought for. Yet what had he fought for really? For the Seraphic Council, which had hid so much from him? Who demanded Teralel's death out of sheer cowardice? For Uriel, who had let Malakar and Carassiso escape in the first place? None of this would even be happening, if Uriel had done his job. Teralel would not be suffering.
The Seraphic seals were so, so strong, so far beyond anything Trias had ever encountered before. To set his power against them was like trying to move a mountain with the wind. Yet that only stirred his rage further. The Seraphim had set Teralel, poor, sweet Teralel, against such power. Sealed away or no, this was beyond her! Couldn't they see that?
"Let's go, Trias," said the Dark One. "Just a tiny little crack, that's all I'm asking for. Can't you even do that?"
His words were full of cruel mockery, but Trias ignored them. Let the Enemy have his fun. He was just a tool in this situation.
Trias poured everything he had into his assault. And when he thought that he had no more to spend, he thought of Teralel's flame guttering out, and he gave more. And finally, finally, the Seals, they…
Well, they did not crack. That was for certain. They shifted, changing somehow, like machinery in motion, like gears rotating against each other. But Trias barely had time to think what it could mean, for the moment that the seals shifted, a flood of darkness came pouring out of the prison and washed over him, drowning him in ice-cold shadow.
"Oh, you fool," laughed the Dark One from deep within his head. "You complete and utter moron. You boob. Don't worry, Trias. I'm going to keep my promise, and send you to your little friend. But I'm going to do it my way."
Those were the last words Trias heard before his consciousness fled.