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How Taylor Hebert Agreed to Be a Slut [Worm/Slut Life]

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Ack, May 24, 2018.

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  1. FlyingWaffle

    FlyingWaffle [Verified Pastry]

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    Thank you for the update Ack. This resolves all of my major complaints. :)
    I appreciate that you have put up with us whiny readers for so long.
     
  2. Dobb

    Dobb Dedicated lurker

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    Thanks! The new versions make much more sense and are actually enjoyable. I'm so relieved I can finally like those chapters! :]
     
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  3. Jetsmillion

    Jetsmillion Not Gay if it is Cute

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    Personally, I'm expecting Taylor to run into a succubus or incubus while with the Magical Girl owner. Taylor locked down all the paths that will force her to have sex, but nothing is stopping SL from throwing temptation after temptation at her. I'm sure that SL has some employees or contacts that are really experienced at making the thought of sex sound very, VERY tempting.

    I'm looking forward to seeing if Taylor's resolve not to have sex will last with all the temptations that she'll have to deal with.
     
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  4. Vague Wanderer

    Vague Wanderer Well worn.

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    Just found this; like it a lot. Using Annette as a carrot is neat. Very interested to see where this is going, and if Taylor will hold onto her convictions.

    Though now that you've brought up idea of having SL revive Annette, I'm kind of wondering about a different potential candidate: Danny. Set up would be different, but Danny agreeing to be a contestant on SL, possibly with genderbending to get Annette back might be good. But that's probably talk for another thread.
     
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  5. necrolectric

    necrolectric [Lazy Catgirl Enthusiast]

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    Well, shit, now I really need to get cracking on writing mine. I want to give it the title "Take Three", which is both a reference to how it would be the third fic to use the premise of Taylor in Slut Life and an oblique reference to certain plot events. But that really only works if I hurry up and write it before someone else does...
    Don't take this the wrong way, but with that context in mind, you might be able to see why I'm somewhat relieved to see you say that you've decided not to write yours.
     
    Shoes likes this.
  6. Guardian54

    Guardian54 Versed in the lewd.

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    Take Three? Is this where the whole Hebert family gets yoinked to join up i.e. Danny and Taylor are bribed with Annette's return?

    Cause they'd have taken three participants...
     
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  7. SaintMichael95

    SaintMichael95 Not too sore, are you?

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    Yeah still don't like it after the rewrite. I said this in the other thread, but them messing up Annette's hormones is so fucking dumb. The whole plot point is fucking retarded and no matter how its spun it's still cheating... Annette still cheated on Danny with another woman and also a futa, which have dicks, so it most definitely counts as cheating. Fuck this bullshit. It would be far better off if that whole part was just deleted from the story. Either way I'm not going to continue reading this story and you have very much soured me to reading any of your future stories Ack. Jesus fucking christ.

    Edit: I mean for fucksake you don't even have cheating in the tags! Wtf?!
     
    Ergoan likes this.
  8. Guardian54

    Guardian54 Versed in the lewd.

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    If dealing with medical conditions makes you sick then good luck when you get older and grow ill more often.
     
  9. SaintMichael95

    SaintMichael95 Not too sore, are you?

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    Oh don't give me that medical condition BS. My whole problem is the sole fact that her cheating is being blamed on a "medical condition". Its horribly contrived.

    Edit: and besides, if she didn't want to cheat an Danny, and the very fact that she's trying to rationalize it would point to that fact, then why didn't she simply opt for being put under until it could be corrected right from the get go? See what I mean by horribly contrived? Don't get me wrong, I think Ack is a great writer, but I also think he has horribly fucked up with this story to the point that it's basically not salvageable without a complete rewrite.
     
    Last edited: Jun 15, 2018
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  10. Ack

    Ack (Verified Ratbag) (Unverified Great Old One)

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    Okay, so who else has a serious problem with Raffie being part of the Annette threesome?
     
  11. Darkarma

    Darkarma Loli Ōtsutsuki

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    I don't. At least not yet. Unless I'm forgetting something I don't think we've even met them. Until then no opinion?
     
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  12. Chojomeka

    Chojomeka Sexy and I know it

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    None from me.

    EDIT: Got around and finally read the rewrite....much much better Ack.
     
  13. Shoes

    Shoes (Verified Desu)

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    Just have Annette tape it for Danny's cuck fetish, have her fantasize about his eyes on her as she gives out blowjobs and shit. It's fine otherwise.
     
  14. Ack

    Ack (Verified Ratbag) (Unverified Great Old One)

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    Please read the rewrite.
    It's in the NSFW section.
     
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  15. Jon

    Jon Making the rounds.

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    I'm not sure what everyone is complaining about the whole story seems totally fine to me. Maybe it was massively different before the rewrite or some such.
     
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  16. SaintMichael95

    SaintMichael95 Not too sore, are you?

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    I want to point out that my problem isn't with the inclusion of Raffle herself, but rather the execution of it. With Annette trying to rationalize it away as not being cheating because it's with a woman is completely contradicted when she has sex with a futa, because they have dicks. The whole idea of it not being cheating because it's with a woman is the fact that there won't be any real dick going in there. Which btw is ridiculous, but that's neither here nor there. If it was established that Annette and Danny were swingers before hand, or even better yet, had them bring in Danny before hand, before Taylor even woke up, it wouldn't have been such an irritating development. Even better yet, if you are actually aiming for the whole Swingers route, which that doesn't seem to be the case, what you could do is simply drop the hormone fuck up plot point, and instead when they offer Annette the chance to be on the show, have her counter offer by suggesting that they bring Danny on as well. That would completely blindside Taylor, and when Annette explains that she and Danny were Swingers but left that life behind when Taylor was born, it would offer an interesting conundrum for Taylor with out it being "Taylor is suffering" and neatly avoiding the "Annette is a cheating slut trying to rationalize it away" bit. You could even add in that Annette and Danny have been with Futa's before, (tinker tech). That way literally everyone wins.

    edit: Annette and Danny get to have some no holds barred sexy orgies with women and futas. SL get not one, not two, but THREE new contestants. And Taylor gets both of her parents back and gets to treat SL as a superhero academy. Of course there need to be drama or conflict. It wouldn't be a worm story without it. But that could, instead of being the cliche betraying cheating mother, be Taylor struggling with her growing desires with all of the sex happening around her. Because as has been pointed out before, her contract doesn't stop her own desires after all.

    Ohhhh it was. It was... you can go read through the thread, this one and the nsfw one, to get an idea of what it was like before. It is a massive improvement, I will say that, but still has some major things that keep me personally from enjoying it.
     
    Last edited: Jun 15, 2018
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  17. aaronboy22

    aaronboy22 Getting sticky.

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    In the original version Taylor was tricked into thinking she had been entrapped into a different contract, and then watched her mother get gangraped for 20~ hours.

    Then it was revealed that the entire situation was a result of Annette' 'hormone imbalance' making her incredibly horny, so she wanted a gangbang. She then got her fuck buddy on the SL Crew to help her trick Taylor into believing she had been entrapped so she could say she wasn't cheating. (This comes with the included bit of Taylor watching the gangbang and being convinced it was rape, because she was the one Annette wanted to believe it wasn't cheating.)
    .
    The majority of the ones you replied to aren't even invalidated by the rewrite.

    Annette is still cheating. She's still being an idiot. She's still going to lie to Taylor. My read on her character might be pretty wrong because, like I said in the NSFW thread, the original version of this story has actually poisoned the character for me.

    No offense, but after this discussion I'm gonna be avoiding your threads and stories for a month or so to avoid getting incredibly angry.
     
    Last edited: Jun 15, 2018
  18. redfog

    redfog I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Personally, I feel like most of this is a natural consequence of the whole "Taylor is a massive control freak so she doesn't pick any interesting options in her contract despite immortality being on offer" thing. There's not much to do with that that isn't horribly contrived.
     
  19. CrimsonFate

    CrimsonFate Versed in the lewd.

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    I wonder what will happen if Taylor didn't have her bug powers and how will that affects her choice in Slut Life.
     
  20. slicedtoad

    slicedtoad -

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    It's fine for me. Sure, the futa is maybe kinda hypocritical, but, meh. Cheating isn't a good thing but it's far from, say, rape, and it's really common. Add in the unnaturally inflated hormones and it basically becomes "I cheated on you after being drugged out of mind against my will." I really don't think Danny will give a shit. His wife has been dead for like 3 years and he hasn't remotely recovered. Her coming back is going to completely overshadow some sex she had due to hormone instability. And, if anything, he's going to be upset that Taylor was on a reality TV show called "slut life".
     
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  21. aaronboy22

    aaronboy22 Getting sticky.

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    Hormones don't change that much. Even more, if they did why would Annette feel so guilty, and lie about it to Taylor?
     
    Last edited: Jun 15, 2018
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  22. Jim Starluck

    Jim Starluck CO, ICS Vanguard

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    I didn't get a chance to see the original chapter before the rewrite, but damn, it must've been baaad to get this kind of reaction on QQ of all places.

    I'm also now wondering what, if any, safeguards or contingencies Slut Life has for accidentally pissing off an ROB.
     
  23. aaronboy22

    aaronboy22 Getting sticky.

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    to quote myself...
     
  24. eddyforty

    eddyforty Getting out there.

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    i've not god any problems with the rewrite, i like it better then the original
     
  25. MudkipSage

    MudkipSage Versed in the lewd.

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    I never read the original, but the current one didn't feel too rapy.

    I kinda just wanna read about Magical Girl Bombshell Skitter, who gets stressed out over a couple of days of being completely bombarded with sexuality and not having any outlet, and fucking goes full skitter on some hapless bad guys of the week, and intimidating him into submission.

    Maybe she ends up getting more and more popular specifically because she doesn't do lewd things. Forbidden fruit, and whatnot.

    People wanna see her switch between being super embarrassed (and cute) and super domineering (and hot). Maybe offer her a contract extension, with interesting options for when she gets back to home?
     
  26. edale

    edale Versed in the lewd.

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    Right now her only conviction is "I was willing to fuck random strangers to get mom back, but then they tried to screw me over with that, so I'm gonna take them for everything they're worth, without giving them the one thing that they obviously want (Taylor having lots of sex on screen), while making sure I get what they originally promised me."
    Hmm... And in the Annon Must Die difficulty you are forced to "take three" owners...
    In the original version:

    Right as Taylor signs the contract, the computer screen flickers, and Taylor sees something is different, the contract disappears. Tori can't retrieve it, and tells Taylor that she's going to get everything straightened out, but do NOT go with anyone if they come before she sees the contract. Seconds later the security team shows up to take Taylor to the med bay for her (currently unknown) modifications. Lines like "if I had a penny for every time a contestant tried to back out the second ink was on paper," were thrown around, a firefight (with stunners) results and Taylor forces them to take her to Arbor, who they say was in a sleep cycle and will be very annoyed to be woken up, "but if you just come with us to the med bay, we'll just ignore this as a misunderstanding."

    Arbor pulls up the contract. The altered contract had, amongst pretty much all the worst options (Tyrone anyone?), the sex slavery adjustment, AKA a 50 year contract as a slave after you finish your run on the show.

    Arbor doesn't believe them about it being altered, despite it violating 2 verbal contracts, one of which was with Arbor himself, and even asks if Tori wants to file for reparations for Taylor breaking the verbal that Tori would be her Cutie, and orders Taylor taken away. Taylor comes up with the idea to check the cameras in the bathroom where they signed the contract, which proved that the contract was altered. Arbor refuses to do anything to fix it without getting something in return, such as Annette signing a contract with stipulations requiring things like Taylor/Annette/random guy threesomes.

    Tori offers herself for a 12 hour unrestricted slavery contract as an alternate, and when Arbor starts talking about a pay-per-view humiliation gangbang, Annette says she'll join the gangbang on the conditions of no humiliation, no viewer suggestions, no rape, and no pregnancy, Arbor agrees.

    Taylor jumps in that Annette doesn't have the mods to handle a 12 hour gangrape, Arbor agrees, and add on the condition that Taylor watches the gangrape, and has the ability to say when Annette is too tired, and call for a break (pausing the 12 hour timer), as well as deciding when Annette is rested enough to continue. (this was without a doubt my biggest problem with the chapter).

    All 4 agree to the verbal contract (which I noted had no proviso that Arbor had to succeed in getting Taylor out of the altered contract), and Arbor goes off to reverse the altered contract to Taylor can sign the one she actually agreed to.

    Then you had the NSFW chapter (which originally was 3.5, not 2.5, so came after).

    You have Annette and Tori having sex, find out about the hormones, and find out the entire thing was planned out by Annette, so she could get a gangrape before her hormones were fixed.

    So basically the original setup had Annette being the mastermind behind a scheme that would have made The Trio, post-Locker, wince at the sheer level of mind-fuckery involved.

    My post about very easily seeing Taylor snapping and killing everyone it the room was a very real thing that might have happened with canon Taylor. Because remember, Taylor was thinking that she would be watching her mother get raped, not that her mother wanted it.
     
  27. Komrade Comrade

    Komrade Comrade Comrade

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    I think it depends on your definition of problem.

    I see it as cheating, Taylor and Danny probably would see it as cheating, and it even looks like Annette sees it as cheating and is trying to lie to herself about it. I think there would definately be some kind of fallout when they find out, either when Annette spills the beans out of guilt, or the Raffie or Tori spill the beans because they don't see it as much of an issue. Even keeping the secret would be an issue, Raffie and Tori seem to have some level of morality, and keeping secrets that might hurt a family should weigh on them even if the sex itself doesn't. Annette is already feeling guilty.

    It's also something that could happen. Taylor has a perfect image of her mother that Annette may not be able to match up to. Her struggling with that could be an interesting plot by itself.

    We don't know too much about Annette before Danny and Taylor, maybe she was a sex crazy nympho and was only waiting for a chance to jump on a million dicks. (It doesn't seem like this was what you were going for, but her history with feminism can explain her sleeping with Tori.)

    The one thing I hope doesn't happen is that Taylor's contract ends, everything's happy, and right after they sign up for another one a little more risque because everything went so well- the secret comes out to make more drama.

    I think a lot of the issues people have is that she's acting against the few preconceptions we have about Annette.

    1.She's a faithful wife(all the cheating)
    2.She's a loving mother(no longer an issue, unless you count the cheating impacting her relationship with Taylor)

    We (or at least I) expect her to act towards that, or have a good reason why she would act against them. I feel like if she was doing something contrary to that, she would have to be so overcome with lust she wouldn't be able to talk to Taylor in a coherent manner (Or have a really good reason). She hasn't started burning books or anything, so teaching her English doesn't really come into play.
     
    Last edited: Jun 15, 2018
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  28. Jonakhensu

    Jonakhensu I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    The cheating thing is fine, for now, as it is obvious that Annette is trying to lie to herself about it just as much as she's lying to everyone else. This means that she still has time to tell the truth about it later, which could provoke a decent amount of character drama and growth later, either when Taylor finds out or when they get back and Annette admits to Danny that she cheated on him in a moment (week) of weakness.

    Considering Taylor is taking the teleporter options (unless that has changed, too), they could even take Danny to meet the people his wife cheated on him with/got help from.

    All in all, it's a decent set up for future catharsis, which is sucky short term, but has decent potential for long term pay off.
     
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  29. Ack

    Ack (Verified Ratbag) (Unverified Great Old One)

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    I've addressed the cheating aspect in the last rewrite for the current chapters. Here.
     
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  30. Lightxdarkwing

    Lightxdarkwing Versed in the lewd.

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    Thanks again, the rewrites are much better. Can't wait to see where this goes next.
     
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