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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Ah, making a reference to a rapist, pedophile,necrophiliac, that is somehow meant to make this better.

    Guilt is a good reason for him reversing their conditioning.

    He could also just try to get away from them after he reverses them so he can finish with the rest.

    Paragon may also not be all that comfortable with mind controlling tyrants, seeing as he's fighting the Reach now, who mind control people and who he has been shown to dislike.

    And putting quote marks when you wrote heroes makes it sound like you don't actually consider them to be heroes when they are.
     
  2. Maxx Crowley

    Maxx Crowley I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    I swear to god.....if people who wanna argue with Zoat about the semantics of what amounts to a one off side character that literally doesn't matter in the slightest, and that gets Zoat to say something that runs afoul of the rules, and this piece of work gets kicked off this site...I am going to be pissed.
     
  3. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    This is...honestly one the most half assed excuses I have ever read on why something that is very clearly something is not that something.
     
  4. Flightless Man

    Flightless Man Versed in the lewd.

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    Your example is correct, but culturally and psychollogically, what he Tangsied does to Dianna is torture.

    Having a choice to kill someone quickly and the wound takes longer to bleed out is one thing. Choosing a long drawn out way of killing someone is torture when he could have branded/OL copied her for same general result.

    Now i like Tangsied existing as a worst case scenario, I like seeing what horrible things you can do with him. I see it as dark mirrrors of earlier times when Paul/Grayven were shown similar oprotunities that they resisted. Like how Paul told Zatana his age and didn't hook up with a lovepowered girl.

    Paul and even his darker renegade side have shown Zoat doesnt't morrally agree with the evil versions, so attributing Zoat to what kind of monsters his villains are is very unfair and only being done because we have a PoV of him.
     
  5. DAT_NOOB

    DAT_NOOB Accused of writing in a far away land

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    No, no I mean the currently mind-controlled "heroes" who have had their brains rewritten is who I was referring to.

    Perhaps I should have made that more clear.

    I was thinking tangseid had a contingency for being 'returned to baseline' and have plans for the 'baseline' Tanglseid to get mobbed and redosed.
     
  6. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    I wasn't trying to compare their characteristics to Zoat, but rather trying to show that his reasoning was flawed.

    Sadly you may have a point about that contingency thing.
     
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  7. Flightless Man

    Flightless Man Versed in the lewd.

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    You did not succeed then. It really comes across like your calling Zoat evil.

    Your well reasoned parts got mixed with the snarkier comments and it blends your responses, making it unclear your intent.
     
  8. DAT_NOOB

    DAT_NOOB Accused of writing in a far away land

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    I mean if I had my mind altered into an 'evil' (evil in quotation because that would imply I'm good) and the 'evil' version of me liked how I now was it's the first thing I'd do.
     
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  9. Pez

    Pez Spaceman

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    Zoat's not doing anything against the rules. This is in the SFW section, and it is. If you're looking for something darker, I believe Cambrian has a one-shot where a WW clone is captured by a Circe clone, who mind breaks her by having her constantly raped by giant pigs.

    Rape and mind control are semi-common themes in comics. I mean, Superman almost filed a sex tape with Big Barda. What Zoat's doing here is tame. Now, if he put some of these as sidestories in the Eros thread... Great, now I really want that.

    This is QQ. Kink shaming is discouraged. Bad guys are bad guys. I'm not trying to claim that that version of Paul is good, though I'd love to see what made him decide to do that to WW. I can't fathom a valid reason for it, but I'd love to see if there was a reason other than "I really want to fuck her, and I really want her to want to fuck me."

    [Edit: fixed typo. And to hell with French kings.]
     
    Last edited: Dec 22, 2020
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  10. DAT_NOOB

    DAT_NOOB Accused of writing in a far away land

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    Plot twist eros paul is actually tangseid.
     
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  11. Maxx Crowley

    Maxx Crowley I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    I think Louis XVIII of France should be ashamed that no one in his family could think up a better name after 17 other tries, and I'm not afraid to say it. What's the matter frenchy? Bad food, too much cheese, can't think of names?
     
  12. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Sorry if you thought that but I was just trying to show that his reasoning was flawed, not imply Zoat is evil.

    Well seeing as this one jumped at the chance for an upgrade even though he didn't know what said upgrade would do to humans, maybe he'll be a bit more reckless and hopefully not make such a contingency.

    I doubt there was any deeper reason than that, and even if we are given one it will most likely be an extremely hollow one that makes little sense to anyone but his deluded self.

    Not really.

    Eros Paul is just a version of paragon that decided to accept a three way invitation.

    He's enlightened, Tangseid is not.

    He cares about consent, Tangseid does not.

    Though I'm assuming you were just joking there.
     
    Last edited: Dec 22, 2020
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  13. Doccer

    Doccer I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Hear Hear!
    Correct. Especially in a culture where men are notorious for forcing women into a subservient role of being obedient objects for their pleasure.
    Assuming of course the purpose was to kill quickly and he was unable to finish the job or unable to heal/alleviate the injury/pain in an expedient manner due to some physically blocked reason that kept you from doing so.
    I mean there are a number situational factors that can apply and be argued with with only the knowledge of:
    What that Paul did was wrong. And not just for the parts that Mr Zoat is aware of.
     
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  14. Flightless Man

    Flightless Man Versed in the lewd.

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    That is fair, and i do agree with his reasoning being an end result i would not reach (It's not flawed though, it follows a logical train of thought even if we disagree.). Its a difference of opinion, not factually incorrect.

    I was trying to explain. But i failed and came across accusatory instead, which was not my intent.

    I apologize. My goal was to clear up the snarky comments that were intermingled with the comments on this topic and highlight were the argument why your responses were getting so much push back. It was not my intent to come across as another hostile. I am bad at explaining myself and generally need several tries for clarification.
     
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  15. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Yeah, I also sometimes have trouble explaining myself, at least in verbal conversations, so I can sympathise.
     
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  16. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    No, Superman did film a sex tape with Big Barda. Darkseid shows it to Scott earlier in that comic. Scott just stops him filming another one.
     
  17. Rafin

    Rafin Not too sore, are you?

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    I meant "property values" in the same vein as white flight in US history where white people rapidly sold their houses after black people managed to move in.

    Where does the White Martian conversing with Paul have the term Neapolitan Laws from? Did Paul mention this quip on Martian live TV in the past?
     
  18. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    The term could have been used in some of the materials Martian Womanhunter brought with him.

    I'm assuming that not all of it was porn.

    That, or the ring just translated whatever word he used into 'Neapolitan', since it had the closest meaning.
     
    Last edited: Dec 23, 2020
  19. DAT_NOOB

    DAT_NOOB Accused of writing in a far away land

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    I still don't understand what ice cream has to do with this.
     
  20. Someguy Somewhere

    Someguy Somewhere The Critical Fumbler

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    Ice cream that has 3 distinct colours

    Martians have 3 distinct colours.

    Its a sort of nick name for policy.

    We have plenty of weird names for laws in this world.
     
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  21. Flightless Man

    Flightless Man Versed in the lewd.

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    Well its also used to refer to someone from Naples.

    Origin of 3 color icecream is Believed to be Naples from all evidence.

    3 color icecream is also called Harlequin icecream in many areas. (i doubt Harley is on the moon sadly)
    Chocolate/vanilla/strawberry was only popularized in america. in Italy it was made to look like the flag with things like pistachio. Now in my head, all Martians have an Italian accent.
     
    Last edited: Dec 23, 2020
  22. Sockmonkey

    Sockmonkey I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Snart can care. His issue is that his brain can no longer grok the concept of long-term safety.
     
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  23. DAT_NOOB

    DAT_NOOB Accused of writing in a far away land

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    Thank you for clarifying.
     
  24. thebishop8

    thebishop8 Umm, ackchyually...

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  25. Threadmarks: Back Seat (part 4)
    Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    4th July 2012
    21:39 GMT


    The White Martian with the guns pointed at him looks my way.



    "If you think I'm lowering my telepathic defences in a situation like this, you've got another thing coming. I realise that it's not your preferred way of communicating, but I would appreciate it if you could speak out loud."

    The shape of that Martian's throat changes slightly.

    "This.. is.. inefficient."

    "Direct contact with my mind can be… Unhealthy. Non-green power rings require a rather emotional mind state, and I've knocked Manhunters out through simple mental contact before. Besides, would you want-" I glance at the four… No, now eight Manhunters who are guarding the tunnel. "-to risk them influencing me into attacking you?"

    One of the Manhunters jerks his head my way, his form shifting into that of a J'onn lookalike.

    "You have been invited here by the Prelate. Your person is inviolable. I would rather let this mob cut off my arms than disobey her command."

    "Let us say that I accept that you would not do so deliberately. Do you know enough about unshielded human minds to avoid doing so accidentally, by inadvertently imprinting your schematic models into my thought processes?"

    "It.. should not-. No." The Manhunter doesn't look around, but the rest of the squad ripple and either adopt a similar shape -and given the appearance of one of them, they've clearly been watching Mr. J'aarkn's recording- or at least add a larynx to their default shape. "Are you satisfied?"

    "I can only talk with people who can talk." I turn my head towards John. "Lantern Stewart, what set this off?"

    "The Manhunters don't want to let anyone other than B'enn B'lanx talk to us. Which means everyone else has to stay outside. Mister B'lanx's followers aren't happy with that."

    Gun-target White Martian inclines his head slightly.

    "They think I might have an accident."

    "I don't care enough about what happens here to want to kill you."

    "So you say. But we Whites don't get access to planetwide news messages unless we steal them. I have no idea who you are or what you've done."

    "You know how Mars has a habitable surface now?"

    "It does?"

    "Yes. Well, breathable atmosphere and enough of a magnetic field that you don't have to worry about cosmic rays. It's not exactly liveable yet, due to being a barren wasteland, but that's a work in progress. I was going to claim credit on the grounds that it was an Orange Lantern who got things to this stage at my request, but I suppose… If you didn't know about it there's no credit to claim."

    "I suppose that it's nice that you made an effort."

    "I'm also why most Martian cities have relaxed or abolished restrictions on their White inhabitants. I assume that you knew about that?"

    "Yes. Why?"

    "Because colour-based restrictions with no basis in biological reality are horribly unfair. I have a White-."

    "You have a White. Best. Friend."

    "M'gann M'orzz is the only Martian I know well enough to call a friend, and she's been on Earth for over two years."

    For a moment I consider creating a construct image with her likeness, but of course colour is important. Instead, I take out a hologram projector and generate an image of her default form, next to one of her monochrome mission form.

    "Have her reports of earthly heroism made it this far?"

    "No. We would never be told anything about a heroic White."

    Well, darn. No, I suppose that they wouldn't, and Martians probably wouldn't consider heroics on Earth all that important anyway.

    I tap the side of my forehead with my right forefinger.

    "Alright. I'll focus on everything heroic I've seen her do. For your own safety, don't stray from my surface thoughts. And-" I look around the crowd. "-just you."

    "Fine."

    I feel a slight push even as I go through the mental transformations needed to remove my shields. My familiarity with M'gann and Henry means that I also feel his response to an alien mindscape: a distinct hesitation. Good. That shows good sense and is what I wanted anyway.

    **[Meeting M'gann for the first time.] [The fight with Mister Twister.] [Santa Prisca.] [Red Volcano.] [J'aarkn, when she went white full time.] [The Young Offenders.]**

    I skip the Burner without making it obvious that I'm skipping something. If he were more used to my mind he might spot it, but since he knows that he's getting a slideshow it doesn't appear to register.

    **[The Star Conquerors.] [And a hundred snapshots of minor social interactions and heroic deeds that didn't qualify as full-fledged missions.]**

    "I see."

    His eyes glow faintly, and from the way the Martians closest to him are doing the same I assume that he's sharing what he saw with them.

    "Do you accept that on the balance of probability I do in fact have a White friend?"

    "Yes. And you have no special reason to harm me." He raises his right arm and points to the talkative Manhunter. "That one does."

    "Would you accept a smaller bodyguard? The rest could stay in the next cavern and watch telepathically."

    The talkative Manhunter grimaces. "They should do what they are told."

    "You can go back to beating up unarmed civil rights activists once I'm gone. My understanding is that you've been told that I'm allowed to have this meeting. I'm choosing to have it with…" I count Manhunters. "Twenty White Martians rather than a hundred. Or one. Is complying with my request a problem?"

    "Yes. They aren't our only security concern."

    "Last year the Hyperclan tried to kill me when they tried to undo the mental reprogramming of a convicted rapist and murderer I was visiting. The fight ended with most of them retreating while one remained in Manhunter custody. I doubt that the violent fringe of the White Rights movement regards me fondly."

    I pause.

    "You have access to those records, don't you?"

    "Yes." The eyes of another member of the squad light up, presumably the communications specialist. "We will confirm-." An eye-flicker. "I see. Very well. We accept your claim. We will permit you to discuss matters with a small group. The rest will disperse."

    "The rest will remain outside."

    He stares at me, and his eyes flicker for a moment.

    "Very well."

    "But. " I turn back to Mr. B'lanx. "No one with the Hyperclan symbol. They already tried to kill me once. I'm not keen on them trying again."
     
    Last edited: Jan 15, 2021
  26. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    I doubt he's all that flattered that a potential racist is a fan.

    Sweet Christ, they honestly aren't informed of even that?

    Ohh, so do Martians have something similar to that 'I have many black friends' thing, but use Whites?

    'means'

    'regards'
     
  27. Idkusername

    Idkusername Versed in the lewd.

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    Does Martian society have whiteface? /s
     
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  28. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Maybe, we know M'gann had greenface for several months.
     
  29. SpiritualSlacker

    SpiritualSlacker Nurse God of Mischief

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    Martians could likely only have white/green/red/whateverface in the obviously inauthentic way, at least within their own culture, since they identify each other through telepathic contact rather than visual markers (which makes sense, considering they are shapeshifters).
     
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  30. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    He's trying to make contact, isn't he? As if anyone would leave themselves undefended in this situation?

    At least the fellow's doing as he's asked. After all, what reason does he have to distrust OL and GL?

    And you know at least one of them might. If only to justify a crackdown on the 'uppity' Whites...

    Okay, that's a decent cop. He lives for the job, doesn't he? No political bias, just the law and his duty above all?

    Morphing into a more human form to put the outsiders at ease? There's a subtle touch.

    Wow, is that stupid. With their prior behaviour, why wouldn't the White group assume they'll casually 'disappear' B'lanx as soon as they get the chance.

    See/ Even he thinks the same way I do.

    Probably a top-level decision. Don't let the 'animals' get ideas 'above their station' by controlling what information they do get. And every reveal makes the local leaders look worse and worse...

    That's just... :eek: What, did the Reds and Greens plan to take the surface, and leave the White living in the caverns? Because I would not put it past the hardliners to be planning just that...

    Even B'enn here doesn't sound like he expects to ever see any benefit from it... God, I want to see the Whites rise up forcefully just to make up for this shit...

    Why? Because seeing such inequality is an insult to him? Because all this racial tension and misunderstanding is wasteful, both in time and lives? Because he wants a better world for everyone, regardless of who or what they are? Take your pick.

    ;) Okay, I'll give B'enn that. It does sound like a horrible cliche.

    Because she owns her birth colour these days. No hiding in a green palette swap for a long time now. And it is satisfying.

    Honestly, I doubt the Greens would share that info anyway. One more 'uppity White' in their eyes, I bet. Even though she's half-Green.

    Nothing like first-hand experience of someone's character.

    The suggestion that anyone else, Green or White, will run into massive shields is probably not lost on the crowd. There's probably something of a social faux pas there, maybe...

    Including the recap of her alternate's details, no doubt. Man, OL is in complete control of this interaction, isn't he?

    And since she's one of his closest friends on the team, early on at least, there's probably a lot of such moments. x3

    Which OL fully expected him to do, no doubt. Which means the entire White population in the area will know within hours. That's a definite morale win for the White population.

    And we're back to the original problem. But now OL has that big bonus to his social checks with B'enn... Joy of conversational side-tracks...

    Okay, dude? That attitude is exactly what they're having a problem with. But clearly he and his have never considered that <gasp> They could be wrong!

    And you have a Green Lantern here to help keep the peace (Depending on whether John chooses to wait out here or not.) Whether it's the Whites who start something or you Greens...

    That's putting it mild as milquetoast. I suspect more than a few of the older Hyperclan members still want his head. What their leader wants? :sneaky: We haven't seen that yet...

    To echo Captain America here: "Son... Just.. don't." That is not going to happen, I think.

    If he thinks he can bully the Whites into moving on, He is seriously mistaken. Unless he wants to trigger a race war in his town?

    Smart. It's going to be tense enough keeping the peace in there without some bravo deciding he stands a chance at starting something...

    Well, one confrontation averted... And a handy sampler of M'Gann's heroism dropped into the local headspace. Who knows what effect seeing that will have on some plucky youngster, whatever their colour?


    ...to avoid doing so accidentally...
    If he were more used to my mind...
     
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