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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. Buggy123

    Buggy123 I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    When one has just swum out of a sea of shit, even a toilet seems like the cleanest thing in the world.


    (In other words, I'm still amazed and happy that we're somewhere where you can say things and not immediately get banned for it. Combine with the fact that I'm still thoroughly in the habit of brown-nosing so hard that you have to be careful to avoid teeth, because that's what you do on SV to not get banned, and yeah I can understand why you'd think that.)
     
  2. Threadmarks: Z-E-R-O (part 15)
    Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    2nd January
    16:23 GMT -5


    "Thank you, detective."

    I smile politely, then open the door to the interview room where Mr Hamill is sitting… Pacing in a state of agitation.

    "This is bull-!"

    I raise my hands, and she cuts herself off. I nod and smile in thanks, then turn and close the door.

    "Mister Hamill-."

    "On top of everything else, I gotta get a lawyer now?!"

    "Good news: I'm a lawyer."

    She stops, frowning. "What? Is that some sort of.. superhero sideline thing?"

    "Sort of." I gesture to one of the chairs with my right hand. "Would you like to sit down?"

    She shakes her head a little, but pulls out the indicated chair and slumps into it.

    "Both presently existing Lantern Corps are run by members of a species that originated on the planet Maltus. They're a very old species, and.. more than a little arrogant. Now, because they went pretty much everywhere in the galaxy before the species living there now -including ours- even existed, they… Say that they have a prior claim over the territory. They're generously letting us use our own worlds for now, but they claim the right to intervene as they see fit."

    "Sound like a bunch of pricks."

    "It's a.. posture. And most places are very happy to have Lanterns around. But, one of the ways this 'universal jurisdiction' manifests is that they consider themselves authorised to practise law anywhere. And once they started hiring people from younger species to work for them, they extended that to Corps officers as well. As a result, I can practise law pretty much anywhere in the universe. So right now I'm having my ring feed me everything I need to know about American criminal law, and it's giving me a bit of a headache. So."

    I pull out the chair opposite and sit down.

    "The two men you're alleged to have assaulted."

    "They literally told me that they robbed a place. They said they thought I was a supervillain! They were trying to hire me!"

    "And I believe you." I make a point of maintaining eye contact for a moment. "Do you remember exactly what they said?"

    "Ah… Guy with the bag didn't say nothing. Guy at the front… Ah… Said I was… A long way from Gotham… Tried guessing my superhero name, and… Asked if I was a bad.. girl…" She frowns. "Huh."

    "Huh?"

    "I'm not like a total knuckle-dragger or nothing… But-." She focuses on me. "If you were working with your shirt off and some chick whistled at you, how would you take it?"

    I shrug. "I know I look good. I'd find being whistled at.. a bit odd, but if it was just a one-off thing I think I'd smile, and.. maybe pose a little. I mean, if I wasn't fighting a supervillain at the time or something."

    "Right, see, I always figured I'd do the same? Never happened, but…"

    "But?"

    "He was leering and shit, and he grabbed my tits."

    "That makes things legally simpler."

    "I don't know what I'd have done if some chick did that to my actual body… Some chick who wasn't Amy-" She smiles. "-'cause I've got a pretty good idea what I'd do there. Know what I'd do if a guy did it… So I guess that's equality for you?" She shakes her head. "Grabbing a chick's tits. I mean, who the fuck does that?"

    "Apparently, Mark Bardon, arrested on suspicion of eight counts of breaking and entering and presently in hospital with electrical burns."

    "Is-? I mean, is he gunna die or something? I was just trying to shock him…"

    "The police weren't willing to say. But since I have a power ring, no, he's not going to die. He'll be completely fine in a few weeks. You did less damage than you would if you had shot him."

    Mr Hamill pulls a face. "Bastard. So what the hell am I here for?"

    "He claims that you blasted him with lightning and took his money."

    "His money?"

    "I… Suggest that whether he stole it first or not doesn't help your position unless you immediately returned it to the person you believed to be the lawful owner."

    "Okay, yeah, I guess… But what the fuck was I supposed to do? My wallet disappeared when all my clothes did. And Amy didn't believe I'm who I said I was."

    I nod, sitting back slightly. "Okay. You weren't carrying the money when you entered the Themysciran Embassy. Where did it go?"

    "I stuck it out the way on the roof of the next building."

    Ring…

    Item located.

    "Okay, good. Did you spend any of it?"

    She shrugs. "I bought dinner…"

    I nod. "Okay. I'll get the bag and hand it to the police. Generally they're prepared to overlook minor offences when something sufficiently weird is going on, but I would encourage you to tell me now if you hit anyone else, or… Did anything else that might constitute a criminal offence."

    "Ah… I mighta damaged Dan's truck when I changed." She shrugs. "I didn't really see…"

    "Anything else?"

    "No. Just… On the truck, transformed, flew home -you know about that-, ran into the guys on the roof, kinda wandered around for a bit, got something to eat, wandered around a bit more, then… Went to the embassy."

    I nod. "Alright. Now, going back to your encounter with the two on the roof. What were you doing when you first encountered them?"

    "Amy… Took pity on me. She gave me some of her clothes when I left, but they didn't.. fit..?" I nod. "I was trying to get them on anyway. I guess I heard them coming up the fire escape, but I didn't really notice until… What'd you say his name was? Mark? Until he started talking. The guy with the bag stayed back until I blasted Mark, then he shot me a couple a' times-."

    "I'm sorry, shot you?"

    "He didn't hit me." She shrugs. "So I blasted him too. He alright?"

    I sit back. "The police only arrested Mark. Since he wasn't on the rooftop, I think we can reasonably assume that he recovered somewhat. Finding him should serve to keep the police occupied, at least. Now, the detective overseeing the investigation wants to conduct an interview. Obviously, I'll be here to offer advice, but these are the key points as I see it. You were attacked and acted in self-defence. You did take the money, but there were extenuating circumstances and it's going to be returned. And you don't intend to take up vigilantism as a hobby. Okay?"

    She nods, and I get up and head for the door.
     
    Last edited: May 21, 2019
  3. Sceptic

    Sceptic Critical Irrationalist

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    Well yeah, but we're here, not SpaceBattles. :p

    In the SV mods' defense... wait, I got nothing :p
     
  4. Dakkan Sall

    Dakkan Sall Random Encounter

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    Should be "wandered" I believe. Or at least I've never heard "wondered around" before in any context.
     
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  5. Queshire

    Queshire Not too sore, are you?

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    might be an accent
     
  6. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
    How do you mean?
     
  7. Dakkan Sall

    Dakkan Sall Random Encounter

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    It's nothing major. QQ's threadmark dropdown just happens to be organized newest to oldest, compared to SB and SV's being oldest to newest.
     
  8. david15

    david15 Not too sore, are you?

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    It comes up as 15,14,13,12 I wouldn't worry about it I think this site just has it so the newest chapters are listed at the top of the threadmarks list
     
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  9. Yog

    Yog Know what you're doing yet?

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    I am pretty sure that this is not how license to practice law works. Paul would have to be acknowledged by the local lawyer association / government, or there would have to be some pre-existing general agreement with the OLC. Now, at least in Red Lantern community that was taken into account, with Paul using a loophole where the color of the lantern was not specified in a U.N. agreement (and that was shaky ground for sure). Something like that ("U.N. agreement with GLC / Justice League makes me a licensed lawyer") would work better here, at least in my opinion.
     
  10. Vaermina

    Vaermina Well worn.

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    It was the bank thing, called it. :D

    The State of New York would need to have a reciprocity agreement with Maltus for that to work.

    Otherwise you're just some guy who, temporarily, knows the law.
     
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  11. Queshire

    Queshire Not too sore, are you?

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    Hrm, since you can represent yourself even if you're not a lawyer then you'd think that you could have someone else represent you even if not a lawyer. I think you just couldn't call yourself a lawyer? Still, it's not like it's a big thing.

    Honestly I would have thought that more places would have problems with Lanterns acting as cops. Even for places that are good, they'd still be an agent of a foreign power acting as police, and I doubt many planets have the concept of superheroes to excuse it.
     
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  12. RichardWhereat

    RichardWhereat Aia airëa Fëanáro.

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    Maybe that same thing exists here? Only different enough to allow it.
     
  13. Selias

    Selias Well worn.

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    Anyone know what chapters the Teen Titans and MCU timelines/omakes/whatever were in?
     
  14. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    Oh, he has no idea...

    Oh, hey, a case for self-defence.

    "So I blasted him too. He alright?"

    A nice-clean wrap-up. Of course it can't be that simple... There's still the Dial, after all...
     
    Last edited: Sep 7, 2019
  15. RichardWhereat

    RichardWhereat Aia airëa Fëanáro.

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    Fools Canon. I think.
     
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  16. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
     
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  17. Buggy123

    Buggy123 I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    A lot of the time it seems like the bureaucracy of the law is simultaneously complicated, convoluted, and yet flexible enough that unless you really push, you can get away with a lot of things if no one has a issue with it. It could very well be that despite the technical issues people have brought up with Maltusians claiming universal jurisdiction, OL can still act as a lawyer because no one's wanted to contradict him. Especially since in a universe as weird as DC, they'd definitely have to learn to be a little flexible.

    I bet he basically just talked briefly with the local police captain, and on hearing the explanation the captain just said "Eh, whatever, go talk with your client. I gotta keep working on this paperwork for that guy that swapped brains with someone else and then robbed a bank."
     
  18. Grek

    Grek (she/her)

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    I am seriously hoping that OL gets laughed out of court with that argument that he's qualified to practice law.
     
  19. Chaoswind

    Chaoswind Lord of nonsense

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    The US government is going to argue against the guys that have had a fucking sentient planet operating in the Solar system? A planet big enough to support life IE at least around the same size/mass of mars.

    You are SERIOUSLY overstimating how stupid the governments would be... in comic book land the argument would have merit, but in this fic the stupid politicians have been wising up after all the shit that has happened in this fic that Paul has been spearheading.
     
  20. Pinklestia

    Pinklestia Well worn.

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    Comic Books Logic.

    You know how foreign medics can be granted a temporary licence so they can assist in a great medical emergency without getting sued?

    Well, The DC Earth in Young Justice made a deal to grant all ring wearers honorary lawyer titles.. without getting specific it had to be the Green ones.

    Is explained on the Red Paul snips.
     
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  21. Buggy123

    Buggy123 I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    "And what makes you qualified to speak on the behalf of your client, if you haven't been certified as a lawyer by the state?"

    "The alien supercomputer that I wear on my finger implanted a entire law doctorate into my brain fifteen minutes ago."

    "... Fine. It beats that guy with two heads who served as both the defense and prosecuting attorney last week."
     
  22. Vaermina

    Vaermina Well worn.

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    Eh, the issue isn't likely to actually make it to court.
     
  23. Queshire

    Queshire Not too sore, are you?

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    If an appeal to force works for the good guys then it'd work for the bad guys too.
     
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  24. RichardWhereat

    RichardWhereat Aia airëa Fëanáro.

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    Appeals to force do work for good guys and bad guys. When they work though, they're legitimised.
     
  25. Xelloss

    Xelloss Know what you're doing yet?

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  26. Mquz

    Mquz Versed in the lewd.

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    Also, would it really matter if bad guys could represent each other in court? Either they’re not allowed to be there because they’re convicted bad guys or they could just get a mob lawyer or something anyways.
    On a side note, does DC have any superhero lawyers? I know marvel has plenty including she-hulk and daredevil, but does DC?
    Edit: looking it up, the list only has Icon, who is Rocket’s partner who was briefly mentioned in this fic once or twice.
     
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2019
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  27. Ct613hulu

    Ct613hulu Experienced.

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    I would assume that the argument of force majeure would prove sufficient in most cases for any sane earth government to respect the authority of the Green Lanterns. The Green Lantern Corps is vastly more powerful than any earth nation and has a history that make the accomplishments of humanity seem meaningless in comparison. Earth Courts declaring the authority of Green Lanterns to be illegitimate is much the same as a single american declaring his home his castle and deciding that the laws of the United States no longer apply with the key difference being a much larger distinction in terms of power and legitimacy. The weaker power can ultimately only get away with their claims so long as the stronger power considers it beneath their interests.

    This is exactly what happens. A cursory study of history shows that horrific crimes go unpunished all the time when the perpetrator is too powerful to punish.
     
  28. Vaermina

    Vaermina Well worn.

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    A funny thing about the Law is that a significant portion of the case history needed isn't digitized.

    So Paul's ring probably has some rather hilarious holes in it's knowledge.
     
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  29. Maxx Crowley

    Maxx Crowley I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Icon I believe. But I'd never even heard of him or Rocket before this fic. So I don't know any more than that.

    Besides...are we really arguing the DC justice system? The same system that allows the Joker to commit mass murder time and time again, while letting him off with an "insanity plea"? That never seizes his stolen assets, allows him to use them to fund a legal "dream team", and I feel I should stress again....continually allows him to plead "Insanity" after committing mass murder. (Which, while I'm no legalmatition, I'm fairly certain is NOT how insanity pleas work, and certainly could not be used over and over.) Oh, and they do this while in the very next breath, he cackles about how he'll do it all again same time next month.
     
  30. RichardWhereat

    RichardWhereat Aia airëa Fëanáro.

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    He's able to scan books into digital knowledge.
     
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