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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. Cuchulin

    Cuchulin Versed in the lewd.

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    "A little above subsistence level"? That is pushing it quite a bit since the Invaders are basically the Roman Empire only slightly more advance and with magic. Certainly they don't have anything the capacity to do more than feed a small percentage of Japan, but they do have the capacity to feed a relatively large military as well as having plenty for a more or less idle upper class.
     
  2. DAT_NOOB

    DAT_NOOB Accused of writing in a far away land

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    I think both countries would prefer that than the other getting a hand in that pie.
     
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  3. Yog

    Yog Know what you're doing yet?

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    China and U.S.A. will be the ones pushing for it. China first, Russia second, and U.S.A. third. Because existence of the Gate is an existential threat to their existence. Starting from the mundane threat of unknown diseases and continuing with "if a Gate opened in TOkyo, what are the chances that another one will get opened somewhere else"?

    The Gate is a very classic example of OCP existential threat to modern world. Technology to open Gates represents an unassailable asset, akin to nuclear ballistic missiles in WW2. The potential of Gates opening at random places represents existential threat that needs to be defended against.

    And there are established mutual defense treaties that would allow U.S.A. to act immediately. Basically, U.S.A. can cite that an attack on Japan by means of OCP magic represents an immediate danger to U.S.A.'s existence and security and invade in all but name. The treaty is there for them to do so.

    And no, China and Russia will be at the table. Because frankly, one inconveniently placed Gate is far more a danger than an opportunity.
    Are we talking real Rome or completely fantasy Rome? Wiki gives me the maximum size of Roman army to be 450k people. Which is not a lot.
     
  4. Cuchulin

    Cuchulin Versed in the lewd.

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    Some where in between I think. Also while not impressive by modern standards it is far, far more than "A little above subsistence level" would support, especially considering cliché of "Roman decadence" they were living up to at least partly, and the fact that they were a professional military meaning for about twenty years about all they did was be soldiers rather than raise crops or live stock.
     
  5. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Goo goo g'joob.
    As I understand it, in gate canon the Japanese government repudiated that treaty prior to the start of the story. Which is a wasted opportunity to do it in story as a demonstration of how bad relations are getting, but no one is arguing that Gate is good.
     
  6. Threadmarks: Summer's End (part 2)
    Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Trudge
    Trudge

    "…covered up forever." Artemis shrugs as we continue marching through the dingy grey landscape.

    I nod. "Is she alright? She knows there's no way she could-."

    "Yeah, she… Knows. But it was still her powers that got them killed. She feels guilty."

    I suppose it was inevitable that Miss Kane would discover that the car crash which killed her family was the result of a flare in her magnetic abilities. Natural that after being around superheroes and being trained to investigate crimes that she'd want to look into it. But as the song goes, 'Knowledge can also destroy'.

    "You and Master Xu getting on alright?"

    "Uh-huh." She glances around. "Uh."

    "What?"

    "I've got three arrows left."

    "If you'd added an Apokoliptian blaster when you were upgrading-."

    "Can you make more?"

    "Yyyes, because fletching is something I'm super interested in, as bows are the cutting edge of space age weaponry."

    She rolls her eyes.

    "I mean with your Mother Box or whatever."

    "Puuuuuuugggggh-."

    I pat Mother Box's case lightly. "Don't strain yourself. And the answer is maybe. Usually I do most of my fabrication work by power ring with Mother Box's guidance, but my rings are out of power and Mother Box is struggling. And I don't have any other equipment or raw materials."

    "How about this.. coral..? Stuff?"

    "Yes, I guess I could build a simple lathe and shape a shaft." I stop for a moment and tap an outcrop with my right forefinger. "Don't know how it would shoot without fletching, but the stuff does seem to be surviving here."

    "I'd cope. It's that or keep reusing these arrows. Apokoliptian arrows are kinda deadly."

    "Well… Yes."

    "Look, I… Get it. Killing… But I don't wanna kill someone unless I have to."

    "She probably had torture arrows." I shrug. I don't remember there being an Apokoliptian archer, but it wouldn't exactly astonish me. "Besides, target arrows aren't exactly low-lethality at your level of strength."

    "I can shoot to wound. With my… 'God powers'. So long as the arrows don't explode."

    "Fair point. Okay, once we get somewhere I'll see about sorting you out. When did you last eat?"

    "This morning. How long can… We, go without eating?"

    "I don't know. It's never really come up before. Hunger weakens us, but I've never heard of a New God dying of hunger." … "But that's probably more because we lack the patience to wait for each other to die than any indication of immunity."

    "Great." She huffs. "How're we getting back to the present, anyway?"

    "Depends when we are. If it turns out that we're in the past I can just build a stasis chamber of some sort and we can wait it out." I remember a comic where the Justice Society did exactly that. Bit of a plot hole about why Black Adam didn't kill them off while he was in evil mode, but the idea was sound. "Depending on when we are. I'm hoping that the skies will clear and we can work it out roughly from the stars."

    "And if we're in the future?"

    "Then.. we.. have to hope that the Castle Revolving comes back at some point, or some other time traveller comes to pick us up. Failing that, we can settle in for the long haul and build a portal to a parallel universe."

    "And just abandon everyone? What about your kids?!"

    "By this point… I mean, if we are in the future, then I imagine that they're long dead, along with everyone else we know."

    "And that's… Fine?"

    "They're alive in the past. Either we get back, in which case I continue to raise them to the best of my ability, or we don’t and… It stopped being a problem a long time ago." I shrug. "I can work out how annoyed I should get once we have a better idea of when we are."

    She nods, and we continue to walk in silence for a few… I'm not sure, actually. With no power rings and with Mother Box not doing all that well I don't have any reliable way to tell the time. Never occurred to me to make a New God watch.

    Those actually do exist.

    "So you're… Dating a pony."

    "Princess Luna of Equestria. We have a magic portal which links an area of Sunset's laboratory to a mirror in her palace. Going through turns humans into ponies and ponies into humans."

    "That's how Sunset got here in the first place, right?"

    I nod. "Do you want to go through and frolic in a meadow as a quadruped? I'm sure you're due some downtime after this."

    "I don't think that's really me…"

    "I frolic. I sang musical numbers with magic ponies."

    "M-musical numbers?" She doesn't look like she believes me. "Really?"

    "Yeah, they just sort of happen there. It's like a Disney film. Bit PG in places…"

    "I don't think I need to know-."

    "No, I'm not… Boasting. They're just anatomically complete and don't wear any clothes. Their tails usually cover their genitals but they're definitely there."

    "So I'd be 'frolicking' naked."

    "No, no, you can wear clothes. They just don't usually bother with that themselves."

    "What do you look like as a pony?"

    "I'm huge and grey. Grey pelt, dark grey mane and tail, grey horn and membranous wings."

    She stops, staring at me. "You turn into a flying unicorn pony?"

    I wiggle my eyebrows. "And you would, too. And… Not exactly on the 'flying'. Turns out that flying with two additional limbs is actually quite difficult. Luna got a laugh out of it, but I don't want to give the impression that it comes-."

    "Did you kill my Dad?"

    That… Catches me a little off guard. Lying and covering up would be my usual approach, but we could be stuck here for a very long time, and I think she has a right to know.

    "Yes."

    She doesn't look surprised. I suppose that Paula would have had to explain the body somehow.

    "When?"

    "Santa Prisca, the first time."

    She frowns, then her eyebrows shoot up. "That was-. Like, your first mission. You still looked human back then."

    "Yep."

    "You didn't have your Apokoliptian memories back. You thought you were just some.. regular office worker guy, and you killed him."

    "Yep. I had a power ring and he had a crossbow. Wasn't exactly hard and he definitely had it coming." I raise my eyebrows. "You going to tell me I'm wrong?"

    "No…"

    "I was honestly surprised that no one called me on it at the time. Batman at least."

    "And the-." Her eyes widen. "You injected yourself with venom buster on purpose! How did-?!"

    "Obviously. How did I what?"

    She stares at me in astonishment. "How did you get away with that?"

    I shake my head, shrugging. "Pass. Ask Batman when you get back."
     
  7. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    Are they dating?

    I remember that there was a New God archer in the n52 comics that belonged to the Council of Eight from New Genesis.

    Maybe 'called me out on it'

    Author bullshit of course.
     
  8. Queshire

    Queshire Not too sore, are you?

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    My, my, poking fun at your own plot holes?
     
  9. thebishop8

    thebishop8 Umm, ackchyually...

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    Did she think it was an accident? What the hell kind of excuse did he give back then?
     
  10. King of Frost

    King of Frost Wishing I was somewhere colder no doubt.

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    If Zoat changes it then that's correct too, but "called me on it" is used enough everywhere that I don't see it as weird.
     
  11. Handlewithcare

    Handlewithcare Versed in the lewd.

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    Batman would turn into a literal Batpony. And hate it.

    I think Supes and Wonder Woman would enjoy the singing and general happiness and stuff though.

    Jonn has turned into weirder...or, wait, would he become a Changeling?

    Flash would turn into a Pegasus I think and Aquaman into a Seapony/Siren.

    Cyborg...dragon? Cyborg earth pony? Or unicorn?
     
  12. Thrackerzod

    Thrackerzod Just a regular, magical unicorn

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    Missing threadmark.
     
  13. Mquz

    Mquz Versed in the lewd.

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    Huh... guess whatever is keeping people from asking questions whenever a hero does something questionable but not villainous is based off of nanomachines then? Now... whose evil plot is that involved in? A technology villain pretending to be a hero? Unless the vampire sun also works on magic - in which case it’s just Dr. Fate.
     
  14. Mquz

    Mquz Versed in the lewd.

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    Batman at the very least would just be a normal pony wearing a bat costume. Flash would be an Earth pony, just REALLY REALLY GOOD at running.
     
  15. ChiChi

    ChiChi I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    seems to be missing a threadmark
     
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  16. Stsword

    Stsword Versed in the lewd.

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    Artemiz the Fury of Apokalips has homing explosive arrows by the by.

    I assume that's what the "if the arrows don't explode" comment was in reference too.
     
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  17. rkyeun

    rkyeun Cabbitus Maximus

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    I've stopped keeping count of how many updates literally nothing happens.
     
  18. Agent Orange

    Agent Orange Experienced.

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    I think he's just mentoring her on the whole 'being a (magical) pointy stick launcher guy' on their respective teams. He's significantly older than her. He's Mr Tao from Paragon's side.

    Tripped into it probably. Or got drenched in it when the chopper exploded (basically Flash's origin story) or something to that end I think.
     
  19. PJCG

    PJCG Getting sticky.

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    Wait....
    That was his excuse?
     
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  20. Sockmonkey

    Sockmonkey I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    I just realized that the lantern oath uses the same cadence as star light star bright.
     
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  21. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    That would be Frances finding out about the tragedy of her tragic backstory, I suppose. Hopefully with Wally's help and the rest of the team's support, she'll not go crazy.

    :( As I said, with any luck she won't fall down. This Frances has a lot more support than the comics version. She might hate herself for a while, but with enough people telling her it wasn't her fault, she might actually start to accept it.

    Heh, young godly love. Or infatuation. Not everyone meets the One in their first relationship. That's usually the one where you learn the pitfalls of other people...

    Heh, bit worried about her role as 'pointy stick launcher'? Seriously, diversification, girl. Should have got more weapons when she had the chance...

    Yes, that's totally the best use of your time... Then again, you don't seem to be getting anywhere anyway...

    Okay, Grayven, dial it back a little. There's sarcasm, and then there's being an asshole.

    Boy, it's a good thing Mother Boxes can't vomit. She sounds like she's suffering the world's biggest hangover, and it just. Won't. Stop.

    Workable, if you find enough straightish pieces of it. Even if it weren't her Godly archery powers would probably compensate a little.

    ...Yes, and? That's like complaining that the Sun shines. Or that water is wet. Apokalips doesn't particularly do non-lethal, not willingly at least.

    Oh, sure, you've never had someone you shoot at move slightly while the arrow's in flight, and turn a wounding shot into a riskier hit? Arrows are not the most gentle of weapons, you know.

    True, there is that. I mean, she can probably shoot around corners by now.

    And that's quite a good question. Have there ever been scenes of New Gods going hungry in the comics? After they awakened their Godhood, that is. There's no doubt Granny's charges often went to be with empty bellies...

    On to more important topics. No-nonsense, I like that. Not sure whether you'd want to eat anything here anyway.

    I remember that storyline. I suspect 'evil' Adam just didn't care, or he felt a duty of honour not to harm them. Or the writer forgot that detail, as so often happens. :rolleyes:

    A parallel universe where you can recharge the rings and get out from under the Vampire Sun's light. Good planning. Wonder how you can manage it without conventional technology.

    Perspective. For all they know, the Human race has died out completely after one of those alien invasions, that seem to happen every Thursday in the comics. Admittedly, even if they haven't died out, you'd be hard pressed to recognise them as human anyway.

    Good plan. Don't sweat stuff you can't do anything about. The obvious goals now are food, shelter, and information. And a passing Sheeda patrol would fix at least two of those things.

    Heh. Semi-intelligent chronometers that are precise down to the femto-second. Just the thing to time a speedster when they do speedstery things.

    Thankfully they haven't progressed past the dating phase. Can you imagine the fun Grayven could have, oversharing his, shall we say, bedroom successes? But, a gentleman doesn't tell.

    Honestly, she probably could use something like that, between the Sheeda invasion and the 'Mister Sivana's wild ride' trip they're on here. Would be interesting to see team members take him up on that offer, even if they Boom Tube there.

    Oh, yes. Spontaneous Choreography and everything. Amazing what a world-spanning magical field with a sense of humour can do when it flexes.

    :eek: Oh, god, I wasn't serious about sharing! Remember, Grayven, she's all of sixteen or so.

    You'd be in good company? It's not like Ponies feel any shame about it.

    "Well, do you know what a Clydesdale is?"

    Technically, it's an Alicorn. Though that honour is getting more common by the day, if Sunset has her way.

    Whoa, hear the tire screech on that conversational swerve? Did Batman teach her that tactic?

    :D Honesty!

    Keep in mind, she didn't like him. He may have been her father, but he wasn't her Father.

    Amazing what one bad day can do to someone, isn't it?

    Is it that surprising? I mean, most supervillains didn't start as hand-wringing, evil-laugh-giving loonies like the Joker. Is it so hard to beleive a rookie hero might mess up?

    Sportsmaster had a bodycount. Not as big as some of the Shadows' best agents, but he wasn't a nice guy, even if you ignore the abusive child-rearing methods.

    As if you'd try and inject someone you're fighting with a formula that makes them stronger, tougher and drives them into a murderous rage? Any other method would require The Renegade back then to have slapstick-tier clumsiness... With a power ring.

    Batman probably guessed the truth day one. But he allowed it to pass because it made The Renegade more useful. If less covert, mind...

    Honestly, I'm starting to wonder if the Sheeda exist yet. I really figured they'd have noticed the temporal flux of these two's arrival. Or are we likely to see them run into post-apocalytic Columbians soon?
     
  22. moralrelativity

    moralrelativity Recovering pendant.

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    I like this fic because it's a good mix of character development and relationships as well as the super action we all love. And so I liked this installment.

    If you don't like the relationship development then you might need to find a way to just accept or ignore the ones where "literally nothing happens". :rolleyes:
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2020
  23. Xelloss

    Xelloss Know what you're doing yet?

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    I don't mind if nothing happens, if it does in an enjoyable and entertaining fashion.
    But then I enjoy slice-of-life (in reasonable doses) so I guess it's a matter of preferences.
     
  24. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    No, Celestial Archer, Xu Tao, is a teenage member of the Team in the renegade side.

    I think you're thinking about Mr Yao, Accomplished Perfect Physician, whose an adult and is member of the League on the paragon side.

    His powers include sound manipulation and using it for healing and other things.
     
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  25. frommerman

    frommerman Getting out there.

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    A Leslie Fish reference? In my WTR?

    It's more likely than I thought I guess.
     
  26. Agent Orange

    Agent Orange Experienced.

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    Brain fart. You're completely right. My bad.
     
  27. Aeess

    Aeess I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Yes, since New Year when they made out on the watchtower. Tao didn't know if it was appropriate, but Renegade told him it was okay, later Tao started working as a super-hero in Star City to work with Artemis more often.
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2020
  28. nick012000

    nick012000 Gone for Good

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    Cyborg's got a Mother Box powering his cybernetics, doesn't he? He'd probably be an alicorn, or at least he'd be an Earth Pony with cybernetic wings and horns that grant him alicorn powers.
     
  29. Eponymic

    Eponymic Getting sticky.

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    Yes, but Ian Flemming references the difference between old francs and new francs in much the same way in Casino Royal. Where in Bond uses old francs to "feel richer"and new francs to handle debts to make them "feel smaller". In context the proper units of tempature would "feel richer" and the French units would "feel smaller".

    Likely reading too far into it though.
     
  30. CTrees

    CTrees Chasing the ring

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    In comic books, I can't stand the issues where they're just standing around talking. I've dropped multiple books because everyone was just standing around talking in street clothes (looking at you, X-Men).

    But here, my biggest, recurring complaint has been the conversations we don't see. I'm not completely sure what the difference is. Might be Zoat's writing, might be this not being a visual medium. Might be because it tends to be world building.

    Your complaint just made the difference stick out to me.
     
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