"Mister Morillo and Mister Tell are violent thieves, but the damage they usually do is nothing compared to the average week in some places. The fact that they put on a-"
I glance at the two where they glower up us, in Mr. Tell's case through the hood of a nanotube-reinforced straitjacket in order to prevent him… Firing his… Skin cards.
Not the
strangest superpower around, really. Disgusting, but honestly
threatening to humans.
Ew.
Technically, neither of them have 'costumes'. Mr. Morillo has fairly functional schizo tech body armour while Mr. Tell just has a pair of jeans so that he can reach the skin cards which cover his torso, though I suppose that the cards themselves could count.
Especially if they form in aesthetically pleasing patterns. Like Red suits on his left side, Black on the right, that sort of thing.
"-n exotic appearance doesn't somehow 'prove' that they're worse."
She frowns. "Tell me where's worse, then!"
Please don't, she'll go off...
"Tijuana still has the highest murder rate-."
There's a roar of displaced air and she's gone, and I silently mouth 'thank you, Eris' to myself.
...half-cocked. Oh,
boy. The United Mexican States is not going to know
what hit it...
Then I turn to the unexpectedly expanded Garrick family.
"Sorry about that."
...She's new. And , uh...
special.
"That vas a accurate assessment. Did you have that one saved up for long?"
"She means well, but she's... Ah…"
...Really hard to come up with ways to explain her
unique outlook.
Jay nods. "Easily distracted and a bit headstrong."
Blitzen nods. "If her head can survive an impact mit concrete like that, it must be strong. She is your Overgirl?"
...Ah, that literal German mind.
"No, 'headstrong'. Impulsive and determined in following through on those impulses. And she's certainly someone's Overgirl."
"Ah." She nods. "I see. That is not a problem that Angelika has. She is always very deliberate."
And I'm sure Earth-10 is
thankful for that.
"Where is she, anyway?"
"Taking my place in the Neu Reichsmen while I am here. She and Overman are planning somethink, but I just vant them to spent a little time together. He does not like to show it, but he was very scared when she disappeared."
I really hope your method of transit is either very
limited in usable access or very easy to negate.
I look from her to Jay and back again.
"A… Nd..?"
"For a Nazi, she's not too bad."
To be fair, Jay, the Nazis you used to punch out were
assholes. Or at least stuck
working for assholes.
Blitzen grins.
"Danke schön, vater. For a degenerate whose culture is based on that of the two vorts I am not meant to say, you are not too bad either."
...Dare I ask
which two 'bad words' she means? Because I bet there's a
lot she's not allowed to say in 'polite' company around here.
"You can say 'Jew'. It's not considered pejorative."
"Okay, but that vas not the vort I vas going to use."
...Okay. That I did
not expect...
Jay takes a moment. "Was it like this for you, working with Angelika like this?"
I shake my head. "No, Angelika was far less self-confident. And she still doesn't except the name 'Nazi'."
Well, she has
literally never known any other way of life until she arrived here. It's understandable.
"I try to avoid self-deception. I know vhat ve are."
"But… I rather got the impression that Nazis were better at mental conditioning than this. You're being surprisingly flippant."
Why do I get the feeling she'll be a little bit Abridged!Alucard by the time she goes home?
"Ah." She shrugs. "As the degenerates say, 'ficken the man'. The Nazis have very strange mixed messages for actual superhumans."
"Angelika had a… Issue-."
Case in point. I pity whoever is in command of her back home, they're about to have quite a few headaches.
"Jah, jah, she's sterile. How many children do you think any of us have?"
"I'd-. Assumed some? I mean, the whole traditional family role-."
Probably easier for the
male ubermensch.
They can stop by home every once in a while, let the 'little lady' handle the child-rearing.

Gits.
"It doesn't mesh with superhumans. We're supposed to be… Ah… Elevated, jah? Above petty concerns and slave morality. We don't get normal lives. The women are supposed to conform to woman social ideas unt also not, because we are above that. And if you are a madman in command of a project that can produce superhumans, then you were always right and everything you did to make them was right. They didn't even give me a name other than 'Blitzen'."
Playing the 'Jungian archetype' card on her, eh? "She is
Speed. She need be nothing more."
"Huh?"
"Jah, that was very funny. 'Hallo everyone, here is Blitzen, our latest ubermensch, unbound by personal identification but rather a pure expression of an ideal'. 'Jah, but you can call me Johanna Garrick.'" She grins. "I thought they were going to shit themselves!"
Oh,
yes. I am loving her anti-authoritarian streak.
I frown and glance at Jay-.
"I've already had this talk. I'm not surprised that Nazis aren't even nice to other Nazis."
Well, they inevitably needed
someone to be assholes to. Why
not their rivals for power?
"It's the 'survival of the fittest' part of the philosophy. They let madmen do mad things, and if it doesn't work out? Kill them. The idea was that superhumans naturally vould confirm to the higher morality and so to Nazi ideals, because of course that makes sense."
Jay shakes his head. "I still don't understand how they rationalized that."
They're very good at self-deception. You'd think
some of them might look at themselves and ask 'Are we ze baddies?' But
no.
"I said mad scientist, jah? The people who kept going with superhuman cloning research vhen Overman banned them from vorking on his body. They dream a mad dream and do not understand why no one else alzo dreams it."
"So how are you finding this degenerate world?"
I'm sure the leadership
encourages their wunderwaffen research. Never know if you're going to get something
useful, but you never
know, might get the next Overman.
She looks around, then shrugs. "It is okay? On a political level, I do not believe that refusing to ask a question is better that getting the answer wrong. There are many things that your civilisation has that are worse than mine. Is deliberate murder worse than a dereliction of duty which even more deaths?"
Jay nods. "Yes. Much worse. You had worldwide death camps!"
On the other hand, I think I can
guess where she'd stand on people like the
Joker...
"And we did not have the communists. Our civilisation is stronk, vhere as yours could not come together even during an invasion of your whole vorld. The Other Flash feels zo terrible for killing their queen when he should be exalted as a hero."
I smile. "Jay, why don't you take the rest of the evening off? I can ride herd on Blitzen, and I think I've got a job for her that fits her skills perfectly."
And
there's the controversial opinions. Not surprising she'd default to 'Strength good, weakness bad. Unity strong!' Let's hope OL can
work on that.
Jay looks at me, clearly working out how to phrase his scepticism.
"Paul, I'm not sure that's exactly a safe option."
'This isn't a team, it's a
chemical mixture.' And the end result might be
hilarious to some, but not for those at ground zero.
"It's a Justice League mission. I'm working under their rules of engagement, and I just need… Miss Garrick-"
"Hah!"
Well, it's as good a name as any. I wonder if Jay's been living up to the mental image she no doubt had of him.
"-to go to a meeting or two and report back. She'll get to meet a colourful cross-section of the American population and learn about how a society's responses to crises don't have to come from a government entity."
"I…" He thinks for a moment. "Justice League rules?"
Ideally, she won't even see a lick of combat. Realistically, she can at least
end any fight faster than anyone else here. And if she's bound by league rules, she won't even
kill any of them.
"Justice League rules."
"That should be alright. Jo?"
"As a proud daughter of the vaterland, I am eager to start!"
Probably eager to meet all
manner of strange new 'degenerates', I bet. Why do I get the feeling she's something of a
xenophile, due to her upbringing?