2nd January
15:39 GMT -5
"…Electro Lass, A Five Nine."
"'Electro Lass'?" Mr Hamill half-turns to stare at the zeta tube with a look of disquiet. "The fuck is
that about?"
With the destruction of KordTech New York, the usual zeta tube station has ceased to be. I'm a little more saddened about that than I thought I'd be. While most zeta tubes are tucked out of the way to keep them from being staked out by the paparazzi, the KordTech one was both isolated and afforded a good view of New York City. Even though it was just as easy for me to get here by ring, I'd sometimes use the tube to get here because I
liked taking in the view for a few moments. And now if they even include a tube in the new design they'll probably put it in a bunker underground.
I don't know. Maybe… John is all about the journey rather than the destination. I've been more of a destination sort of person. If I'm going somewhere, it's because I want to get there and do the thing. But… Maybe that's one of the things I should take away from this whole 'being dead' thing. I used to fly for fun, now I mostly do it when it would be inconvenient to walk.
"Just in case you decide you
don't want everyone to know about your…" Beryl points her right hand at her head and lowers it, indicating Mr Hamill's transformed body. "
Changes."
She shakes her head. "We wrap this up in a couple a' days an' then I'm drinking until I start to find this
funny. What's the point in trying to keep it secret? Not like-." She pauses for a moment. "I mean, y'know, no disrespect or anything-."
"Superheroing isn't for everyone.
"
"And being one takes a bit more than getting powers."
Mr Hamill looks at her for a moment, then switches her attention to me, grins and points at Beryl with her right index finger.
"I'm
familiar with the sentiment, Mister Hamill, but Squire actually
does have a superpower.
" She lowers her hand.
"And I'll caution you to be aware that you're
probably not bulletproof, and if you're not bulletproof then you're not bulletproof in the country with the largest number of privately owned firearms in the world. Superpowers aren't a fix-all.
"
"She does?"
Anyway, the Embassy still has a zeta tube, so that's where we appeared. I lead the way out via the delivery entrance, a couple of tourists stopping to take pictures as we leave through the gate.
"Sure." Beryl triggers her kinetic belt and rises off the ground. "You alright to fly yourself home, or do you want us to call a taxi?"
Mr Hamill hesitates for a moment, thin strands of plasma forming and discharging around her body. Then there's a
flash as she shoots into the air in a
semi-controlled fashion, and Beryl and I take off after her.
"I'm not sure
most people count '
improved inductive reasoning' as a superpower. That said, I'm
pretty sure you know something about this… Whatever it is."
"It grants superpowers and causes physical transformations. Look for outbursts of superheroic activity with multiple superheroes who aren't seen together and are… Poorly trained.
"
"Already
done.
And sent to Robin. Not sure it'll be much
help, though. America's got a
lot of badly trained superheroes, and the statistics I'm using aren't exactly
reliable. It's 'improved reasoning', not 'magical guesswork'."
She turns, flying backwards while I keep an eye on Mr Hamill. Fortunately she's sensible enough to stay high enough that her momentary lapses in control aren't resulting in her hitting anything. She's actually got a pretty good turn of speed.
"It wasn't
you, was it?"
"If I had something like that, it wouldn't have fallen into the hands of an uncontrolled test subject.
"
"But you've
heard of it before."
"I've tried tracking down all
sorts of schizo tech. There was a.. rumour about a shapeshifting superhero in Colorado during the sixties who had a dial, but I wasn't ever able to confirm its existence. If I
had, I'd have researched it myself. I don't even know what it
looks like.
"
She folds her arms across her chest. "And you didn't mention this
because..?"
"Because I've got stories about hundreds of devices whose existence I couldn't verify and didn't know anything useful about it?
" I shrug.
"John Constantine once sold a fake magic clock to this American millionaire and there was this one serial killer who thought he had the body of the infant Anti-Christ in a box…
"
"Did he?"
"No. He had a rat. That was eating him. Because he went mental, stuck it in a box and taped it to his chest. I mean, I'm glad I
caught him but the undead corpse of the Anti-Christ would have come in
really handy last week.
"
"Hm. And how exactly would Jade feel about you using the dial to 'explore your feminine side'?"
"While she's on the other side of the galaxy doing Darkstar training? Not a lot?
"
She nods, turning around to face her direction of travel once more. "You were trying to put him at his ease."
"It worked with Jade. People can get a bit stunned when they have to deal with superheroes at close quarters-.
"
"But if you play the lad they think you're one of the guys. Not a crazy snake monster."
"I'll settle for 'not a crazy cake monster'.
"
"And he calmed down a whole lot. Which
also means that he's less likely to blow a hole in a wall again."
I frown.
"Again?
"
She points and
oh. The flat Mr Hamill.. shares? With Ms Miller, is sporting a hole in the wall to the master bedroom. Mr Hamill is head downward-.
"Ur-gh."
Still working on his landings, but she managed that with a stagger rather than a collapse so it seems like she's
learning. Okay, I think that was a window, but he took out some of the surrounding brickwork as well. I think I can handle
that.
Mr Hamill walks around to the balcony door and reaches down to her right pocket for her keys before remembering that she's not wearing her own clothes. She knocks on the door instead.
"Am-?
Amy, honey?" Her voice deepens as she tries to affect her original male voice. "
You home?"
Squire lands beside her as she sort of fidgets nervously, not quite able to stand comfortably-.
Ms Miller opens the door. Mr Hamill's
face lights up and she takes a half-step forward… Then stops when Ms Miller shrinks back slightly.
"Amy, those sidekicks told you I'm
me,
right?"
Ms Miller nods, her eyes alighting briefly on Beryl before moving up to take in
me.
"Yea
h. Yeah, I
know, you're just… Kind of a lot to take in right now."
"I get it? I
get that? This is.. pretty weird for me too."
I try to tune them out as I finish patching up the hole. Good as…
Better than new, if not quite up to the standard of what I did for Holly. Still, I do prefer it when innocent bystanders don't have to suff-.
"You..?
Joseph.. Hamill?"
I turn back to the entrance of their home as a couple of uniformed police officers walk up. Mr Hamill smiles.
"
Yes,
Joseph! I didn't think the paperwork would go through that qu-."
"You're under arrest, ma'am."
"What?"
What?