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SHINOBI: The RPG - Act 2 (Naruto/Fallout SI)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Fulcon, May 7, 2019.

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  1. Fulcon

    Fulcon Wim Hoff Method Initiate

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    She got dealt a raw hand this time.

    Daisuke: So didn't either of you have the option of staying home with your eight-year-old daughter?

    Hisako's Dad: I didn't, but I wish I could've. Didn't you have the option of not being a bloodthirsty psycho?

    Daisuke: Hey, I only killed people when they attacked me first. Don't change the subject, this is about how you abandoned your daughter and let her fall into my arms, so to speak.

    Hisako's Mom: The number of times you've broken her heart, you need to stay away from her.

    Daisuke: Hey, she's not entitled to my attentions-

    ...and it turn into this massive argument.

    No, they run missions to the Land of Lightning and are absent from the village for most of the year.

    They would rather her daughter find a boy that was actually loyal to the village and wasn't such a headcase. They'll talk to him if they have to, but other than that, they'd like to steer clear of him.

    As in, at the Chunin exams?

    No.

    They would much rather run for their lives.
     
  2. Kejmur

    Kejmur I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    In most cases I see in fanfiction stories she ends up with Kiba once Naruto is 'taken' by someone else. While there are similarities between them... let's say I'm not a fan of Kiba and move on.

    But whoever she ends up with, I suspect it must be some sort of optimist/determinator, who will be able to support her and cheer her up no matter what. And to be honest finding someone similar to Naruto may be... very tricky in this kind of world to be honest.

    Oh, Nawaki would do the trick. And Daisuke may revive the guy. Pretty much when Tsunade observed Naruto he always reminded her of her little Nawaki Senju. And what little we know they are pretty similar, at least in most basic acting patterns.

    Karin could also possibly work and in the end it's reasonable to assume both are straight, but I think it would be interesting to see? As LGBT culture in Japan has very long traditions in fact and are in fact pretty tolerant towards those, which links describe in detail pretty well.

    From what I remember I read about some time ago, some more conservative Japanese have very specific approach towards two younger females being in the relationship of the same gender, which is still something that shows up in their society. That some people believe that girls 'experiment' and may grow up from their lesbian relationship. Important thing to note is that this doesn't apply to M/M relationships.

    I assume Hisako's family doesn't have any sort of relatives or hire some people to entertain her daughter (like team of genin) for someone to take care of her when they were missing?

    Although I suspect it may be also some sort of shinobi paranoia that doesn't let them trust anyone who may be considered a stranger or something similar.

    Ahh Shinobi the 'bastions of sanity'. Yeah, right :p.

    I suspect it's that far lower tolerance towards differences which in feudal era was pretty popular. Unlike in our times people which were outside of the norm ended up often as 'heretics', 'blasphemers' or they simply ended up dead because society couldn't either afford to raise them (too time consuming or too expensive to take care of the potential cripple or mentally different) or it would make them too different from acceptable back then forms.

    Many, MANY people struggle to think outside of established stereotypes as they are too close minded so instead of actually trying something difficult like learning about them it's either to dislike/hate them and isolate them, so they can stick closer to people they have far easier time to relate to.

    This kind of discrimination in Naruto does show up pretty often, like shinobi against shinobi from different villages or whole Jinchuuriki messes.

    Because this is true. While Classic Naruto tried to promote 'hard work pays off!' message via for example Rock Lee, Kishimoto dunked his own... message/idea and turned Shippuden into a bloodline/bullshit hax/power up out of nowhere escalating power fest. I still wonder why he did it. He tried to copy DBZ model to gain additional popularity? Meh, whatever. Anyway point is that unless you are really lucky (like receive good teacher) if you don't have specific biological advantages, you start from a pretty shitty position in this world.

    And I will simply state that Naruto is hardcore oddity, which I would never expect in real life. Would you expect anyone to grow up like him after the shit and abuse he needed to deal with? Most people would either commit suicide, snap or be completely depressed. It's a MIRACLE Naruto ended up the way he is and honestly I suspect him being Asura's reincarnation is something that helped here alot to survive. Pretty much anyone else wouldn't handle this kind of abuse in the long run the way he did. It's almost impossible.
     
  3. TheLostArchivist

    TheLostArchivist Your first time is always over so quickly, isn't it?

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    I'm sorry, but I think the whole harem thing's absolutely stupid.

    Let me count the ways:

    Anko wants more people involved because she's covering for PTSD (and doing a rather poor job, possibly making it worse by bringing in other people who might result in her getting dropped). She also doesn't trust Dasuke, which is understandable but also partially her fault because they didn't need to instantly bang. (There's this thing called dating...) For that matter, she already got along with him perfectly well because he was a gentleman and helped her out quite a lot for half of a year! (Which counted right up until it didn't, in what seems slightly like a retcon.) So, this could have been avoided with a bit of communication and not being an idiot.

    Dasuke is highly against the idea (or at least wants to be, and compromising morals for things you have dark desires for is a very dangerous slope), and was tricked into agreeing to it. He would have been perfectly happy with Anko, but now he has to deal with the whole "circus" again once word inevitably gets out to ALL the inbred, entitled, shallow idiots who want his babies that he's in an open marriage that he didn't sign up for or have control over. I don't particularly LIKE either of his previous love interests. Also, aside from the circus thing, he didn't want a harem, and IS mad at Anko for forcing him into this (though I still think he could just cut that off, promise or no -- it's not really healthy when your wife tries to set you up with other women because she's insecure and wants to sabotage herself).

    Ino tried to mind-rape/possess him to prevent him from leaving. She also managed to obtain his most important secret (or at least a glimpse of it, even if she didn't figure it out). If there's anyone I expected to him to actually kill, it would be her. That freedom is the one thing, more than the ex-"child"-hotbutton that I can see him blowing up for. Otherwise, I just saw her as essentially a noble heiress who wants a trophy husband and has managed to convince herself that 'she wants the beefcake'. I don't see much understanding toward his actual personality, goals, or desires until far too late, and I'm unsure how much ANY (including Anko) will EVER understand this since they are all indoctrinated by the Village system. (~...Here in our town, where we don't have to wait, To find out that our destiny, Is just to emulate...~)

    Hisako apparently has a stalker crush on him, since he's a worthy opponent (bleh). Again, it was only quite recently that she even took enough of a knock to the head to realize that she was an idiot who only wanted him for his skills (I suppose it could go there if you have a dirty mind (sadly, who doesn't), but that's really not what I meant). He has a freaking wife and they are still chasing him, trying to get into his bed! She has NO understanding of who he really is or what he'd want out of life, and instead seems to want to mold him into a safe, boring chakra sponge to make her all-powerful on the way to ultimate ninjahood. The former would also be something that he's tried to tell her multiple times (CHA didn't really help there, admittedly) and one you'd think that his marriage would finally underscore.

    Whatsername, the Chief's Daughter, simply pulled the political marriage card to learn cool stuffs. We don't even know who the hell she is, and the very first time she actually appeared in the story she signed up as a concubine. I don't CARE if you have mind-reading ninja skills now, that's not healthy! Sure, it fits in character, but if not for Anko's stupid meddling, she'd have quite reasonably gotten dropped like a radioactive mutant potato!

    His "bloodline" is, as far as I can tell, an excuse, and his children probably won't have Gamer powers. I at least am under the (who knows if I am mistaken) impression that they know he has bullshit abilities, but not that there's nothing particularly special about him biologically (in specific, they can't tell for sure since his powers are so bullshit that they don't know what to look for in the first place). Him being a dropped-in reincarnate with a System would normally imply that it's just him, and not just something that can be farmed (which is something I fully expect they will try to do -- which it seems Anko might be trying to help them with. I hope that she's not a plant or going "...and think of Konoha" because that no-suicide quest might just get failed otherwise). To be fair, he's told no one this fact, with possible exception of Anko, so that's only an annoying fact to the readers and not necessarily the characters. But it doesn't help.

    Also, this is partially the God of Evulz' fault, but Naruto is being an idiot and I can see that not ending well when he just ignores Dasuke's actually good intentions and halfway-not-sucky plan to go "We want you back in our village of serfdom, nepotism, and mercantilism because you are too dumb to realize how great it is here, and what a good thing you had going!"
    It's kinda unfair; Dasuke's actually improved slightly by this point.




    Now, for things I liked, because I share some commonalities with the main character and tend to just whine about things I dislike rather than admit I enjoyed things.

    I quite liked the system and how the mechanics work. I doubt that the chakra combinations are all canon (I've not seen Naruto and am going by what I've heard in some fanfics, some of which were never completed), so inventing the new ones and the certainly the jutsu is a lot of effort and deserves a mention for adding to worldbuilding.

    Dasuke's a believable character, and you did an excellent job balancing his knowledge and maturity against his actual age and 12-year-old maturity. Which takes a lot of effort, and is normally handwaved with random crying jags in places that don't necessarily make sense. So, that was very well done, and I appreciate that you didn't do that. I do think his sudden bout of CHA maturity was somewhat overdone, but it was still quite in-character if less plausible in a few places.

    The missions are quite good too, and you had no fear of derailing canon in some places. I'm happy that it wasn't a rehash of canon despite his involvement. I'm slightly annoyed that his failing memory is responsible for not taking out Tobi and the mad moon cult, but I'll let that go for now.

    All in all, it was a very good story right up until he suddenly decided to kill Orochimaru (as much as that was deserved, because the Akatsuki are evil) and then got angry at the village he's been dealing with for his whole life (their unsavory actions aside, reform is still easier from within. At least to that village). Past that point I'm a bit less sure, but I'll wait to see how this goes.





    Can you please not show as many lurid details, though, once they are out of the honeymoon phase?
     
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  4. Fulcon

    Fulcon Wim Hoff Method Initiate

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    I don't really have much to say to this. Everything you're complaining about is either something I like about what I've written, there by design, or is part of the fabric of canon that I'm using.

    So...I'm sorry? What do I say to this? I don't feel like it would be right to change anything.

    Thank you. :)

    *shrugs*

    I tried my best. I'm glad you liked it, though.

    Again, thank you. I personally dislike rehashing canon, so I do my best to change things up.

    It was at that moment where I changed from writing because I wanted to enjoy something to writing it just to finish it. Not particularly healthy, but I needed to finish something since I hadn't done that before.
     
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  5. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Getting sticky.

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    There's a spectrum necessary to criticism and understanding it. The quality and personal enjoyment spectrum.

    You can have something really well done in subject material that you actually like.

    You can have something badly done in subject matter you enjoy.

    You can have something with a clearly high amount of quality with subject matter you don't like.

    And you can have something with awful quality in subject matter you don't like.

    What we're seeing here is someone just straight up doesn't like harem elements. He sees the inherent crazy character problems that such elements usually demand as issues, rather than enjoyable parts of the narrative there for a purpose. He also had mostly good to say about the rest of the work.

    While criticism is a spectrum as opposed to a binary set of two variables, it seems we're mostly on quality product with disagreeable subject matter.
     
  6. Krazyfan1

    Krazyfan1 I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    too bad theres no jutsu to cause them to feel everything that their daughter felt because of them and show them why they were wrong
     
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  7. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Getting sticky.

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    Oh Daisuke could do that easy. One mind reading jutsu for appropriately accurate emotional content, one genjutsu to force the emotion. This is of course assuming you can't just make them ninshu each other.
     
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  8. Mike45

    Mike45 Getting some practice in, huh?

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    Okay, maybe i'm not seeing something or i don't get it ?

    Minato kills around a thousand+ enemy shinobi (during heavy wartime but still) no one calls him a disgusting butcher of human meat :eek:(except Iwa of course, over there he is pretty much their Finnish White Death Sniper-like figure), instead he is lauded as one of Konoha's greatest heroes/idols................yeah i'm actually pretty sure some people will suck him off on the street with the level of Konoha's idolatry i'm getting about Minato, Konoha's idolatry culture sometimes gets really bizarre to me.

    Daisuke kills some number of enemy shinobi and summon beasts purely in defense of himself and fellow Konoha servicemen and/or for the success of the mission at hand, insures the survival of Konoha's next generation in the cursed sewers........gets called a bloodthirsty sicko.

    Daisuke's only flaws/eccentricities (as if there are shinobi without them) is that he's rather fast and loose with the proper chain of command protocols, he's got somewhat an attitude problem with COs (doesn't seems to be a huge problem for Mr.Mac Generic Main Superhero Pants Naruto...........fucking annoying) and tends to be extremely awkward in anything that requires social interactions/navigation (doesn't seem to stop Rock Lee or Gai all that much)

    so how exactly Daisuke is BLOODTHRISTY/NEXT OROCHIMARU PSYCHO by the standards of your average battle-tested shinobi or any shinobi specializing in diving headfirst into combat ? (until the breakaway incident at the end of Part 1 and even then he only used the equivalent of rubber bullets/tazers to the legs, ungrateful bastards)

    Konoha (especially under Danzo's invisible hand) seems to have habit of being ungrateful, impossible to please bunch of cunts for the most arbitrary of reasons.
     
    Last edited: Jul 9, 2019
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  9. MMMm

    MMMm Know what you're doing yet?

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    It's because you're supposed to smile and give a peace sign after you do it, then when everyone's gathered together you give a pep talk and end with a friendship speech.

    It's all about marketing and presentation. It changes people's perceptions entirely.

    If Daisuke spent his free time planting trees, helping out at homeless shelters and preaching about how much he loves the village, then turning and giving a salute to the Hokage monument, then people would just see him as this awesome patriot who uses extreme means to defend his country, and seeks to gain power to better protect it.

    But without all of that, their minds just fill in the blanks in unfavorable ways.
     
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  10. Mike45

    Mike45 Getting some practice in, huh?

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    (So basically be a pro-Konoha ass-kisser 24/7, strange how other shinobi don't have to live up to these ridiculous double-standards when a simple ANBU check-up on him should show that Daisuke despite his incredible superpowers lived a barely "working poor" existence, mostly one room with no furniture, never arrogant and bragging by putting standard shinobi down despite his social autism, at least not intentionally)

    Meh I still call them ungrateful "Burn The Witch !" pieces of shit, wasn't he volunteering at the hospital and providing the academy teachers with new sweet techniques for free in Part 1 ?
     
    Last edited: Jul 8, 2019
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  11. MMMm

    MMMm Know what you're doing yet?

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    Oh, I would never try to defend his friends. He'd have been better off on any other team. Can you imagine this story with Might Guy as his teacher and Lee and Tenten as his teammates? Far less misery for everyone.
     
  12. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Getting sticky.

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    Wrong generation to be teamed with Lee I think. Lee was a the year before Naruto, where I think Daisuke's team was before that. Still, YES HE WOULD'VE DONE BETTER UNDER GAI! That massive pile of earnest loves students with crippling flaws, and will work to ensure the best for them with all the power hidden in his eyebrows. Could've had an excellent tank caster relationship with Lee too. Probably replace Tenten over Neji though. She was pretty blatantly designed as a filler character with minimal screen time or development where neji has actual arcs and effects on other characters.
     
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  13. Mike45

    Mike45 Getting some practice in, huh?

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    I'm starting to get reminded of Irredeemable by Mark Waid, a story where basically a Kryptonian/Superman expy after a number of unfortunate mistakes, kinda goes like "Ehhhh.........you know what ? 'sigh' fuck it :rolleyes:, i'm just gonna enjoy mutilating your corpses instead, how that sounds ? :mad:"

    mind you i read that almost a decade ago so i'm just roughly paraphrasing the gist of it: "I can build a literal heaven on earth for these people on top of a volcano but all i'm gonna get from these ungrateful ants is an endless, indignant RAGE for how dare i not solve all their problems FASTER !, i swear it's like making magic tricks for a dog"
     
    Last edited: Jul 9, 2019
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  14. Fulcon

    Fulcon Wim Hoff Method Initiate

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    Nope, same year.

    It's like you need a reason to do good beyond other people's approval because, as I have been told, many times, you cannot please everyone.
     
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  15. gustyeagle

    gustyeagle Getting sticky.

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    I know how to solve both of these problems and literally every other problem, the infinite tsukuyomi.
    If you want to torture people you don't like , infinite tsukuyomi some completely reasonable and rather inept parents.
    Want to please everyone and fix everything, infinite tsukuyomi those bitches.
    Infinite Tsukuyomi, will literally solve every problem, guaranteed
     
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  16. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Getting sticky.

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    No. Infinite Tsukuyomi is where Zetsu come from. It's why Tobi and Madara only had a few tens of thousands despite "growing" them for years. Infinite Tsukuyomi hits everyone with a genjutsu where they live their perfect day. While the people's actual bodies stop moving the great tree encases them. Over an exceedingly long period of time the mind gradually dulls to repeated information which loses details to dull faster as the mind becomes less equipped to notice. Once it's completely inert the Zetsu programming, mentally and physically, begins.

    Kaguya intended to use them as foot-soldiers when her relatives came to investigate her going rogue. Even before going completely insane, Kaguya wasn't a good person.
     
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  17. gustyeagle

    gustyeagle Getting sticky.

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    Just make a Infinite Tsukuyomi that doesn't do that.
     
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  18. MMMm

    MMMm Know what you're doing yet?

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    You're better off skipping the middle man and just killing everyone yourself. The afterlife is already a paradise.
     
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  19. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Getting sticky.

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    Even in a world where the endless illusion DOESN'T turn all targets into mindless drones you have other problems. What's to provide the body life support, like food, water, and bathroom services if you remove the tree? Further, there's liable to be beings immune to this. What's stopping them from harming the bodies? And oh, wait a tick, who's going to maintain the illusion? Can't imagine doing it yourself and watching over a bunch of vegetables would be fun. It's just not a good plan.
     
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  20. gustyeagle

    gustyeagle Getting sticky.

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    Except he doesn't want to kill everyone or himself, so not really a paradise for him though.
    Otherwise that would be the best method, and something I recommended like a thread ago.

    I don't understand the reason to get rid of the tree, just link everyone up with the magic wood stuff. the Infinite Tsukuyomi canonically keeps people alive for years before transforming them into White Zetsu, the life support is a trivial problem at best. The only ones who can resist it are Rinnegan users, who want it to happen, Zetsu who also want it to happen, and dead people, just re-dead them or make one that works on them.

    People harming the bodies, is easier to stop after Infinite Tsukuyomi, then before. Also the Infinite Tsukuyomi maintains itself / isn't very hard to use . Or just use a clone to maintain it

    If you are bored there is a way to solve that problem, use Infinite Tsukuyomi on yourself as long as you don't want to be bored.

    Also he doesn't really have a plan now except for work towards making a better world and chilling. Infinite Tsukuyomi is a plan that is at least as effect as what he is doing right now.
     
  21. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Getting sticky.

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    Did you just forget the deities, the system's ability to spawn arbitrary and thus immune enemies, or the fact that you can't cast genjutsu on yourself? Or how the tree is literally a part of Kaguya and requires recombining the tailed beasts? Or the fact that even if you could genjutsu yourself you'd never actually get much from it from much the same reason playing a game of checkers with yourself is pointless from an enjoyment standpoint?

    Or the fact that the system is geared toward conflict, and turning everyone immobile will effectively make them all hostages?

    Or the fact that Nagato, the only one with Rinnegan alive right now, has absolutely no idea of the moon's eye plan, and no reason to support it because of this?

    You're not going to find an end to these objections. The plan is fundamentally flawed at outset.
     
  22. Fulcon

    Fulcon Wim Hoff Method Initiate

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    Guys, I've got an ear infection, so the next chapter...is on hold until it gets cleared up. It's just completely messing with my head and concentration. :(
     
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  23. SirTinal

    SirTinal Verified TinFoilHat

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    Wow those literally suck donkey balls, I hope you get well soon
     
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  24. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Getting sticky.

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    We understand. Better to let the author write when he's in his best headspace. It's just a small setback.
     
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  25. MutantRancor

    MutantRancor [Suspected Sithspawn]

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    If it's Swimmer's Ear, I recommend using an eyedropper to fill your ear canal with hydrogen peroxide. That's always cleared it right up for me within a few applications.

    Just make sure you're lying on a disposable towel, or else you might get bleached spots on your pillowcase.
     
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  26. Threadmarks: Chapter 23: The Discussion
    Fulcon

    Fulcon Wim Hoff Method Initiate

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    The Following is a fanbased work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

    ---

    One of the things I found charming about Anko was, well, her hair.

    Anko’s violet hair was really spiky; like an anime-protagonists in the back, but it would spike forward and get into her eyes. She tied it back to keep her vision clear with an elastic. She took it out at night when she went to bed and it would stay out of her face until morning when it just covered the entire top of her face until she tied it back again with the band on the nightstand.

    I don’t know, I just really like it.

    “Good morning,” I told her with a smile.

    “Good morning,” She replied with a brilliant smile. “How’d you sleep?”

    “Fantastic,” I said. “Just like always. You?”

    “It’s always a good night with you,” Anko said with a giggle, leaning in to peck me on the lips. “Did you want to shower first?”

    “Nah, go ahead,” I said, cleaning myself off with a jutsu and pulling a new set of clothes out of the drawer. “There’s a part of the vault I needed to build.”

    “Alright honey,” She replied, sliding out of bed with a smile. “Have fun. See you at breakfast?”

    She walked toward the bathroom with a slightly exaggerated sway of her hips, giving me a great view of the finest bottom that I’ve ever seen. “See you then.”

    I took a deep breath and let it out.

    When she said ‘every night’ she meant it. Luckiest. Man. On the planet.

    With that pleasant thought ringing in my head, I dashed walked out of the bedroom, listening to the sound of the pipes I built coursing with water as Anko turned on the shower. I dropped to the first floor, and turned, creating a new door.

    Given our…topic of discussion today, I think giving Anko something here would be great to let her know that I’m not…mad at her. I’m really not. Befuddled maybe, annoyed sure. But I’m not mad.

    I open the door, coming straight to the stone of the mountain I dug my vault out of and got to work.

    The present I’m giving is a Chashitsu, a tea-house for Anko to host tea-ceremonies, since this is a fairly big deal for her. When we get back, I’ll make another one at the compound once I get a feel for how Anko likes this one.

    First is the house, then the path leading around to the entrance. Create a bench there for guests, a small bathroom over there. Now we plant the garden, some tea plants, other plants, some trees here and there to stretch up and cover the wall. On the upper area, I carved out a wider section and placed a seal up there, using wind release to, well, create wind, get a pleasant breeze going through it to make everyone inside feel like they were actually outside.

    I walked around the trail and crouched down to get inside…good, the matts are in the right formation. Set up the hearth, good. Then the Tokonoma, from which hangs a scroll featuring a quote or artistic calligraphy.

    This scroll had a quote from the Buddha. Well, technically a quote from Civilization IV, but it was ascribed to the Buddha and read by Spock.

    “Meditation brings wisdom; lack of meditation leaves ignorance. Know well what leads you forward and what holds you back.”

    I had to change the wording for the actual translation so it actually read well. Anything else? Ah, yeah. The Chabana. A flower arrangement that goes inside the Tokonoma beside the scroll. Very simple, with white and red blooms in a vase.

    Alright, there we go, one tea house and presumably many tea ceremonies throughout the years.

    Anko wanted to make breakfast today, so I can wait for her. Kitchen and dining area’s clean, right? Let’s go check.

    I zipped out of my new tea-area and flew over to the diner. Yeah, tables are all clean…wait. Oh, whoops. I forgot about dishes last night. Well, let’s get them done.


    Literally just a snap of the fingers to clean the entire kitchen. My old mother would be so jealous it makes me laugh.

    ---

    “So.” Anko took a deep breath. Her trench coat looking crisp and clean since she washed it this morning. Her fingers were interlocked in front of her over the folder containing the legalese for…harems. “Before we start talking about this, I have something to say.”

    “Lay it on me,” I said.

    “Well, when I was thinking about getting this for you, I thought that the main issue would be that you were a prude,” Anko began. “I thought you were sexually repressed and that this gift, in addition to making sure your biggest need as a man is fulfilled, would help you overcome that.”

    “I was repressed,” I said with a nod. “But then we got married.”

    Anko got a small smile on her face, in spite of herself. “You’re right. We did. But what I’m trying to say is that I thought your issue was that you had unhealthy views on sex, I didn’t realize one of your biggest moral anchors was monogamy.

    “You know, that makes a lot of sense,” I replied. “I thought you were just shoring up the defenses in case I fell out of love with you.”

    Anko tossed that thought around in her head with an uncomfortable expression. “I was doing that too.”

    “So, you realize this isn’t necessary,” I said with concern, stretching my hand out to take hers. “I’m committed. And I want to help you, love you, stay with you forever. You know this.”

    “Thanks to Katsuki,” Anko began, grabbing my hand. “I can actually see how we can keep our marriage alive forever. I can see it. But I still want to give you a harem.”

    I wanted to slam my face into the table. Hard enough to leave an imprint in the steel. But I didn’t, because that would upset Anko and this is not a discussion where we need hurt feelings clouding up the discussion. “Why?”

    Anko’s frown got deeper. “Before we go into why, can we try to clear up any misunderstandings about this? I feel like there’s a few.”

    Alright, that makes sense. “Sure.”

    “When you think of a harem, what comes to mind?”

    “A prison,” I replied with a frown.

    Anko blinked in surprise. “Seriously?”

    “Technically a gilded cage,” I elaborated. “The women there are slaves and they’re guarded by men who’ve had their privates chopped off, to stop them from leaving or to stop them from having boyfriends come over. They are not allowed to leave. Sure, they have servants, luxury, etcetera. But they’re in captivity.”

    “That sounds like something you’d hate,” Anko replied, slowly nodding.

    “I mean, I’ve heard that there were cases where harems were just buildings were the women lived and they weren’t all wives of the owner,” I continued to explain. “But when you say harem, I think of the first example. I don’t want to be responsible for that, no thank you.”

    Anko got an inquisitive expression on her face. “Alright…by the way, why exactly don’t men want women being as promiscuous as they usually are?”

    “No man wants to slave away for all his life providing for a child that’s not his,” I answered. “The kind of heartbreak that ensues can drive men to homicidal rage, as I understand it.”

    “Ah.” Anko said, nodding slowly. “I’ve always wondered. That clears things up quite a bit. Thank you!”

    “So, I’m assuming that harems are slightly different here?” I asked with a frown.

    “Well, yes. They are,” Anko said, opening the binder and flipping to the first couple of pages. “There are two kinds of harems and neither of them are quite like that.

    I simply kept silent and let her keep talking.

    “The first type is the type usually seen in Konohagakure,” Anko started. “A new bloodline shows up in the village somehow and we want more people with it. So, the village drafts up a bunch of concubines for him to impregnate, around twenty to thirty. They can be prostitutes, kunoichi, regular civilian women wanting to climb the social ladder, etcetera. Each of these women are bound to the man until they’ve had one child. Then they can decide if they want to stay on or not.”

    “They can choose to leave,” I said with some surprise.

    Anko nodded. “In either type of harem, it’s on a volunteer basis. In the first case, they’re required to remain until they’ve given the man a child and they’re contractually obligated to be completely physically faithful until that child is born.”

    “That’s…better, I guess,” I said with a shrug. “Everyone’s an adult and can make that decision. The ‘stay until a kid is born’ is kind of annoying to me, but if they’re trying to build a clan, it makes sense. Were you thinking of getting me that harem or the second one?”

    “The second kind,” Anko replied. “Instead of the women being drafted up by the village, we would pick which girls would be allowed in. It is technically a marriage, though they have less rights than I do and they can leave at any time. They get full custody of the children they have, if they want it, in the event they decide to leave.”

    “Well, okay,” I said with a shrug. “That’s…not the nightmare I was expecting, actually.”

    “Were you thinking I was going to go kidnapping girls in the dead of night for you to ravish?” Anko asked with a teasing grin.

    “You know, I didn’t actually think about it,” I replied with the shake of my head. “What exactly would your involvement be in this?”

    “I would be the officiator,” Anko said. “The one in charge, the queen, the mistress, the one that beats them if they misbehave.”

    I leaned forward and started rubbing my eyes. “There’s beatings?”

    “Only in two cases,” Anko replied sheepishly. “The first where they refuse you their bed and the second when they maliciously disrespect you or me. Basically insubordination. Anything more serious than that just gets them dismissed.”

    “The first isn’t a beatable offense,” I argued back. “If they’re not in the mood, they’re not in the mood. The second, well, I mean, people get heated and say things they regret all the time. Myself included. We don’t need to beat them over a few words.”

    “I’m just explaining the law to you,” Anko replied, now frowning. “How we implement that law is up to us.”

    I started grumbling, because, well, it just felt wrong.

    “Daisuke, sex-slave is literally their job description,” Anko said, her frown getting deeper. “They would know that coming in. And you wouldn’t have to treat them as just a few holes with a nice package. I would be shocked if you did and a little disappointed.”

    “Oh, I don’t,” I said with a frown.

    “You don’t,” Anko shook her head. “You really don’t. If you have a relationship where you just have casual sex every once in a while, or every day, or have something more, that’s up to you and the concubine. You can like them. You can treat them. You can even love them.”

    “Okay, that? No. No, no, no.” I started shaking my head. “Anko, if I started loving other women, you’ll start having sleepless nights terrified that I’m going to leave you for one of them. I will not put you through that.”

    “Daisuke…thank you,” Anko said with a nod. “I really, really appreciate you thinking about that. That actually makes me feel better. So, here’s what I want you to understand; if they’re a threat to our marriage, I’m throwing them out of the harem. No questions. They’ll understand. Do you accept that?”

    “We could dodge the issue entirely by not going through this,” I pointed out with a frown. “Why are you so insistent that I have a harem?”

    Anko licked her lips. “My reasoning’s changed over the past few days.”

    “Lay it on me,” I told her.

    “First, and I’m sure you’re probably aware, is that I have thought you deserved this since the day you removed my cursed seal,” Anko explained. “I’ve always believed you should’ve had a harem of willing slaves and now I’ve got the ability to put my money where my mouth is, so to speak.”

    “Anko, it was no trouble. You don’t have to pay me back for that,” I said, squeezing her hand. “Really, it was my pleasure to help you. It doesn’t need repayment.”

    “I know,” Anko said with a tender smile. “That’s why you should have this.”

    I sighed. “Alright, what are the other reasons?”

    “The second reason is that you really haven’t had a lot of love over the course of your life,” Anko continued. “I mean, you were basically starved for it. Enough that you were seriously considering Hisako for a girlfriend. That…no. As far as I’m concerned, something needs to pick up the slack for both of your lives. I’ve had more than a few partners over the course of my life. I’m number two in yours. There is no reason life should’ve been that unfair to you, so now it’s going to balance the scales.”

    “Fairness is subjective, Anko,” I replied. “What’s fair to one person is obvious and horrific injustice to the other. Just having you as my wife is more than fair enough for me.”

    I could see her heart melting behind her eyes. “Thank you. But I want to give you everything I can and…this is what I’ve got.”

    “Look, I see you’ve got reasons, I guess,” I shrugged. “But I’m fine. Really.”

    “Well, you say that now,” Anko said. “Another reason? I don’t think you understand how much it’s going to crush you when I’m not in the mood.”

    “If you’re not in the mood, you’re not in the mood,” I repeated the line from earlier. “Seriously, it’s not a problem.”

    “You say that now,” Anko repeated. “Daisuke, I will never say no to you. Ever. You want it, you’ll get it. No matter how much it hurts. But there will be times when I’m not going to want it, you’re going to feel it, and that’s going to kill your drive. You’re going to feel heartbroken; I promise you.”

    “Have I hurt you?” I asked quickly with more than a little alarm.

    “Only in the ways I’ve wanted to be hurt.” Anko said with a reassuring and naughty grin. “You give a mean spanking.”

    “Thanks.” Whew, I was really worried I injured her there for a second.

    “But back on topic,” Anko cleared her throat. “You’re going to be able to tell I’m not enjoying it, because I won’t be as into it as I normally am. It’s going to crush you. I know this because I’ve seen you. I understand you. But, if you had someone else, someone who did want it, who will not say no, that would take a lot of pressure off of me to be on all the time. It’d give me time to breathe, clear out the distractions and get back in order. Even better if you had a variety of girls to choose from so there’s redundancy in place.”

    Ninjutsu Check Success: 100/65.

    “Can’t you just use clones?” I asked with a frown. “I mean, sure, there’s the argument that clones come from you and would suffer from the same…lack motivation, but I just came up with a clone jutsu I could teach you that could give long-lasting clones. Clones that can last for years. Clones with variety. Clones that can handle sex with me.”

    “Well, I mean, the clans don’t usually practice harems or polygyny because of clones.” Anko shrugged. “But that doesn’t take care of the ‘you need more love in your life’ thing I talked about. I can only give so much.”

    “I can have love from, say, Ino or, I don’t know, someone else without having sex with them,” I pointed out.

    “But then I’d be your sole provider of that and as I’ve said, it’s not going to work out,” Anko rebutted back at me. “Then, well, there’s the fact that we’re immortal.”

    “What does us being immortal have to do with it?” I asked, my head tilting.

    “Eventually, the two of us are going to outlive and outlast our friends,” Anko said. “It’s just the way our life is going to be. Because of that, our…grounding with other people is going to corrode and die. They’ll go from possible friends…to people…to just mortals. But if you had a harem, a group of people you have all the reason in the world to gift with immortality, eternal youth, not godhood unless they really earn it, we could both have a larger network of people to keep social with instead of just us.”

    “Shinigami straight up told me he doesn’t want me making everyone immortal,” I answered with a frown. “I mean, I don’t think he’d mind one or two people but…I don’t know. I’d have to ask him. Of course, if we just didn’t go down this route, we could just, I don’t know, make people immortal as time went on?”

    “Daisuke, unless there’s rules in place, the number of immortals we associate with could become endless,” Anko pointed out. “That would really tick off the Shinigami. Besides, we both need friends. Friends with benefits for you, girlfriends for me.”

    “Girlfriends?” I asked.

    “Yeah, girlfriends,” Anko nodded. “People that I can talk too when you’re spent and need time alone. People that, well, I can trust and can relate to as time goes on. You need that too.”

    “I guess,” I replied with a shrug. “But, well, we don’t need to involve them sexually, do we?”

    Anko frowned, squinting as her head tilted. “Daisuke, what is it about your old culture that’s got monogamy stuck in your head so hard?”

    “There’s several reasons,” I started, straightening up. “First off, if I’m your only man, and you’re my only woman, it removes obstacles from the marriage from succeeding. I don’t have other women with a lot of tools at their disposal to try to pry me away from you, you don’t have men trying to get into your pants to use you and then leave you trying to convince me to provide for their spawn.”

    Anko started chuckling. “Their spawn. Heh, funny. It really matters to you that it’s yours, huh?”

    “Oh yes,” I nodded rapidly.

    “Well, it matters to me too,” Anko said with a smile, again, getting that twinkle in her eyes that just melted my heart. “I think the birth of our first child is going to be the happiest day of my life.”

    “Mine too,” I said with a smile to match. “Really. We don’t need to involve other women in this.”

    Anko sighed. “Well, you have any other reasons to stay monogamous?”

    “Just a continuation of the first one,” I continued. “We’ve only been married for less than a week. Adding more women? Women with hopes, dreams, desires of a relationship with me? Some number of them of also scheming of ways to get you and the other concubines out of the picture? That’s going to pull me from you. That’s going to give our marriage a lot of strain and stressors that it doesn’t need. We both need to be present for it, and that’ll be a lot harder for me to be present and help build what we have.”

    “That’s…a good point,” Anko said with a frown. “As I said, I’d throw them out if they were a problem.”

    “But you having to throw concubines out after we’ve been married for…however long we’ve been married when you’ve got it up and running? Something which will probably result in a serious fight if we’re not on the same page about it?” I pressed. “Those are not things we need this early in our marriage.”

    “Okay, that makes sense,” Anko relented.

    “Second reason, a personal reason, is that I am a very private person,” I continued, happy I was finally making some headway. “I went back to Konoha to be with my friends, that’s true. To try to be more social. I wound up married. That’s great. Easily the best thing that’s ever happened to me. But…this is all I can take right now. Involving however many other girls you intend to invite? That’s going to be completely overwhelming.”

    “Oh,” Anko cupped her chin.

    “Then, of course, there’s the fact that I was raised for twenty-four years with monogamy as the default family model,” I replied. “That the father provides a model of masculinity and the mother providing a model of femininity each to whatever degree they had those qualities for their child to see and then develop to whatever side they wound up on as an adult. They were both present. I will not experience my child’s growing years through a clone.”

    “Has your world just not had to repopulate in a while?” Anko asked with a curious frown.

    “The civilization I grew up in hadn’t seen polygyny in use for hundreds of years. Maybe thousands,” I said with a shrug. “I never did dedicated research into the subject, so I’m not sure.”

    “Come on, there had to be one case,” Anko said, her eyes wide in shock. “How could you get that well established?”

    …there was one case. “Well, okay. One.”

    “I knew it. Let’s hear it,” Anko said with a smile.

    “My religion was founded two almost two hundred years ago,” I started to explain. I hated telling this story. It’s honestly all people thought about when they heard it and it detracted from the other things the religion had to teach. “Reception towards it was…hostile. Very, very hostile. Angry mobs, that sort of thing. God, we believed, recognized that we were going to have population problems, so he authorized Polygyny. With the number of times our church and people were chased from place to place, I honestly believe that if it wasn’t authorized, our church would have died out.”

    “Why did they hate your church so much?” Anko asked with interest and a great deal of sympathy.

    “Before the plural marriage, it was the fact that we were telling everyone that we had a prophet, God’s spokesman on the Earth and that no one else had the authority to speak in God’s name,” I explained. “Typical religious infighting, in other words. But once we were chased half-way across the nation, past a giant mountain range where the mobs couldn’t get to us, the practice Polygyny was outlawed. That was almost two hundred years ago.”

    “So, if it was 200 years ago,” Anko started with an analytical expression on her face. “And you believe it was necessary, why do you hate it so much? It’s not considered a shameful part of your church’s history, is it?”

    “By those who don’t understand the history, it is,” I explained. “But I think it had to happen. My issue is that, well, people throughout my nation, throughout the world, still take issue with the practice. Nearly two hundred years ago and they still use it as something to denounce us with. The religion, I remember, made me happy and helped turn me into a better person. I went on a mission to share it with people but…some people would point it out to insult us.”

    “It was a reason for people to not align themselves with your belief system,” Anko said diplomatically.

    “Yes,” I said with a nod. “Yes, that’s exactly it. I just didn’t want them to have that kunai in their holster. That shuriken in the pouch. You know what I mean.”

    That arrow in their quiver.

    That bullet in their magazine.

    I could go on and on.

    “If you don’t mind me saying,” Anko began. “If it wasn’t that, it was going to be something else. They just wanted the moral high ground so they wouldn’t feel like you had a reason to be trying to get them to be better.”

    “It’s not that I thought they were bad,” I replied, shrugging. “I just thought they’d be happier.”

    “Admirable. But, as you said, there’s room in your mind for something like the harem I want to give you in the case of emergencies,” Anko said. “Is that right?”

    “Technically its only if God says so,” I replied. “Because he wants kids to replace oncoming casualties.”

    “Well, aren’t you a god?” Anko rejoined.

    “And you’re goddess enough for me,” I replied with an as warm and inviting smile as I could muster.

    Anko interlocked her fingers. “Well, here’s my last thing. Okay?”

    “Alright,” I said with a frown. “Go ahead.”

    “The world we live in is heading for war,” Anko pointed out. “You know it and you’ve explained it to me. That fact that you’re in Konoha again is only going to slow it down while they figure out how to stop you from raising the dead. You also want to make changes. Big changes. Things that even I’m having trouble wrapping my head around. In order to do that without simply installing yourself as god and commanding the village to worship you, you’ll need willing allies. It’ll be a lot easier for the clans to go along with your plans and edicts if you’re inside their daughters and making them scream your name on a nightly basis.”

    “But they’ll hate every second of it,” I said with a frown. “Seriously, if they aren’t attracted to me and are just letting me have my way with them out of duty, they’ll hate it and me. If I make them orgasm, that’ll just make it worse.”

    “Daisuke,” Anko said calmly. “We have Ninshū. I will not allow any woman into your harem that doesn’t want you. If they aren’t attracted to you, if they’re just doing it out of duty, I will not allow them into the harem. They will need to find some other way of securing our allegiance. Unless there’s extenuating circumstances, such as a fear of severe punishment, then we’ll reevaluate and judge on a case by case basis.”

    “Right, and there we can just provide safe haven until we figure out a way to let them down without them getting murdered,” I said. “Well figuratively.”

    “No, it can be literally too,” Anko corrected.

    “That sucks.”

    “It does,” Anko agreed. “So, will you accept the harem? My gift to you?”

    I let out a breath. “I’m sorry, I…I can’t. I just can’t.”

    “That’s okay,” Anko reassured me by placing her other hand on top of mine. She had a disappointed look on her face, but it was one that had undertones of acceptance. “Really, it is. Thank you for hearing me out. But Daisuke? If you ever change your mind, you tell me.”

    “What makes you think I’ll change my mind?” I asked with a frown.

    “You make life changing decisions and go all in on impulse,” Anko replied with a bright smile. “Sure, you think about it in most cases. Long and hard, but…you have the rare ability to make a complete one-eighty on your decisions and stances on things. Not a lot of people can do that.”

    “I had a lot of growing up to do,” I replied. “When I accepted my death, everything fell into place. This? I don’t think this has anything to do with growing up.”

    “No, but in your heart of hearts, you want it,” Anko said. “I know you do. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

    “…I can’t love that many women,” I replied with a frown. “That’s just me being selfish.”

    “I think you can,” Anko said. “I’ve seen that you’ve got it in you, which is the main reason why I don’t have a problem giving this to you. I don’t feel at risk of losing you. But the relationship you have with them is what you make it. It could be loving and adorable from the second it starts, or it could just be casual and grow into something eventually. If you want. But I won’t force this on you. This is something I want you entirely on board with before we go for it.”

    “Thanks, Anko,” I said with a smile. “I love you.”

    “I love you too.”

    “Now, why don’t we just focus on enjoying our honeymoon?”

    “I’d like that.”

    ---

    Author’s Notes: First, an apology. I told everyone last chapter that I’d be writing the reactions of Itachi and others to people returning to life. My muse…was not having any of it. It was really insistent that I write this chapter and take care of this issue because this chapter and this plot point has been keeping me up at night.

    Second, the delay in this chapter. I wound up dealing with an ear infection…then my other ear got the same infection and I couldn’t write with how it was screwing with my concentration.

    Then my Aunt passed away of cancer.

    I took a trip to Utah to go to her funeral. Auntie, if you’re reading this from Paradise, I love you and I look forward to seeing you cartwheel around when I join you in a hundred years when I finally die of old age.

    Fourth…there’s a lot of people who say Daisuke and Anko say I love you too much. Guys…they’re on their freaking honeymoon. How much they say ‘I love you’ is downplayed from how much I think they should be saying it. And, I tell people I love them all the time! I live with my family, my family is awesome, and I want them to know how much I care, love, and think the world of them. There is not something wrong with me, nor is there anything wrong with how Daisuke and Anko talk to each other. It’s their honeymoon for Pete’s sake!

    Shout out goes out too Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Jiopaba, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Sultan Saltlick, Ventari, PbookR, Seij, ChristobalAlvarez, Aenor Knight, Apperatus, EPiCJB19 and Seeking Raven. You guys are awesome.

    Thank you everyone for your patience while I sorted out stuff and got things together. I’ll try not to make you guys wait so long for the next chapter.

    ~Fulcon
     
  27. llat-2

    llat-2 Verified Smooth Criminal

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    I think those people are just jealous.
     
  28. Fulcon

    Fulcon Wim Hoff Method Initiate

    Joined:
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    I don't want them to be jealous, though.

    I want them to enjoy the story. :eek:
     
  29. Zaynal

    Zaynal Gotta get dat power fantasy~

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    You know, harem or not, it won't be there for fanservice or blindly trying to excise it to appease the readers. You're exploring it, you're discussing it, you're making sure that one way or the other, the story doesn't suffer from its inclusion or exclusion. Thank you for that. I've seen so many stories ruined because the author didn't think things through, didn't think about the consequences of including a trope that the story didn't need, or conversely, a good story that got ruined because an essential trope/convention got removed without exploring why it got removed.

    So thank you, regardless of which option you end up taking, I know the story won't suffer for it.
     
    Asmodai, Zsombi, moonmoon and 4 others like this.
  30. Yinko

    Yinko Versed in the lewd.

    Joined:
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    "Responsibility sucks, never touch the stuff. Now, if I could have the harem be completely managed by some third party, kind of like an exclusive brothel. Then obviously I'd have no issue with having a Sears catalogue worth of sex slaves! But where or where would I ever find such a slavishly devoted madam?"

    Honestly pretty stoked that he's so against having a harem. Logistically, clones solve most of the issues, but jealously and other emotional issues would still be a massive problem. Plus, for private or introverted individuals, having to deal with that many other humans seems exhausting just by itself. It'd be like
    "Tell me the story of the hermit god mommy?"
    "Once the sex goddess got her husband a harem of horny superhumans. They milked him dry for seven days and seven nights, never shutting up or leaving him a moments peace to do what he was actually interested in. So he ran away to a cave and sealed it shut... FOREVER! The horny woman had an orgy in from of the cave to try to lure him out, but this was completely counter productive and he dug even deeper so he couldn't hear their wanton moans. To this day he remains in quiet contemplation while his harem rests in intense sexual frustration."
     
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