The New Abnormal (My Hero Academia/Celestial Mutation)

[CosmicBigfoot]

While cooking is chemistry, it's a much different specialization within that field than what you'd use for support gear that could explode but doesn't except when it's supposed to.

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It's been a while since I wrote that line but I'm pretty sure the joke was earlier someone implied everyone uses home ec class as an excuse to flirt. Aka, they're practicing chemistry with one another.

 

[CosmicBigfoot]

Cpuld we please have a Index with the powers listed pls?

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Sure. This was what I'm using to pull powers from for this specific fic.

Chapter 1 powers:

Diagnosis

This Quirk can be used to give the user incredible amounts of varied and specific knowledge on the body of those visually observed. With this power, the user is able to get precise measurements of all kinds, age, medical conditions, broken bones, birth marks and more. The longer the user continues to observe a target, the more details they are able to learn, almost endlessly. Useful for locating enemy weaknesses or applying medical treatment in equal parts. The user must continue observing for additional details and observe a target in person. Collected details through this Quirk can be remembered incredibly well.

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Chapter 2 powers:

Somnambulist

The quirk user is able to produce a highly potent, sleep-inducing aroma from their body on command that can quickly propagate through an area. Even highly aggressive individuals may soon lose consciousness upon getting a wiff of it. The sleep inducing aroma does have the weakness of enemies needing to actually breath it in for it to work, meaning those who can avoid doing so will remain unaffected. The aroma is more effective against the opposite gender compared to the same gender of the quirk user.

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Chapter 4 powers:

Programming and Computer Science

Supercomputers are your bread and butter, and Artificial Intelligence is your idea of a PDA. Data, programs, and digital devices are your playthings, not to mention that your understanding of such systems mean you can hack anything that could possibly be hacked. There isn't really any limit on the extent you could push computing hardware, and any kind of software you can imagine is within your grasp. Please do note that flaunting this is likely to attract some attention from a few major players in particular. Then again that might not be a bad thing depending on your disposition and plans.

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[nayrik]

Wait a minute, reading the coding power, it also gives computer making superpowers, if to a seemingly lesser extent.

 

[BloodFartMoon]

Wait a minute, reading the coding power, it also gives computer making superpowers, if to a seemingly lesser extent.

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I mean he did say he made a small server for his little Self help Neural Network, and tooru said those are usually big resources hogs unlike Tojis. Therefore implying that Tojis stuff is built different and reafirming tech is dogshit even 200 years in future because Quirk society is in fact a post post apocalypse like Fallout New Vegas

 

[Crista20]

Interesting idea, especially the mother Son relationship and an actual one, hope you continue this

 

[CosmicBigfoot]

Toru knew on an objective level that her bestie was a bit of a, shall she say, big derpy neet… and she appreciated that! Really! He was the yin to her yang! And by yang she meant 'extroverted girlboss', which everyone knew was basically the textbook antonym of a neet!

But still, she couldn't help but notice a few quirks of his that most people would file firmly under 'super fucking annoying!!!', for example: his terminal case of scatterbrain!

It wasn't until they were halfway through riding the train with Toji to go see 'a neat thing' with her neet that she realized he hadn't actually told her what the thing was, which made her ask, which made him reveal his plans on trying to snuff out her exhibitionism like a damp cigarette (very rude!), which then lead to her actual freakout…

"What do you mean you got accepted into U.A.?! Testing isn't even for the next few months!" Toji rubbed his neck as her stared at all the train passengers now staring at them and their conversation, and to that she had to say… oops! But also, maybe he shouldn't have told her screaming material in a whisper environment.

"I dunno. I kind of just ranted about drug statistics with the principal and bombed a few tests." Toru was suddenly no longer worried about her odds of making it into U.A.

"It's that easy?!" Toji's only response was to shrug at that, and she was starting to learn that was just the American version of a moody thumbs up, so that was an amazing sign!

"I guess? I feel like I got in less on merit and more on a lunchables raffle system. You know, like the Vietnam war."

While Toru's sure an American a century in the past would've loved to hear a random teenage kid say that while on public transportation, she was pretty sure they had better things to talk about… like her being forced to wear clothes!

"You know that I don't need a hero uniform, right? I mean, I was totally going to get one, but if this ends up becoming a total mess then… uhh…" What was the polite way to tell someone 'Better get used to seeing me naked' while on public transportation?

Thankfully Toji was checked in to the same yin-yang flow state as her, because he picked up what she put down almost immediately. Unfortunately for her, that also meant he was moving in the opposite direction.

"No way. If we don't do it now you'll probably just put it off until you're literally forced to. Better try and get you some pants now before we get hit by a blizzard. Or an ice age quirk. Whatever comes first."

Considering the fact that trees still had green leaves in February nowadays, Toru was pretty sure it was going to be the ice age quirk.

"Dangit, Toji! Why can't you just be a regular dude and do that thing where you stammer like a diesel engine and cover your eyes while staring through your fingers! Aren't Americans supposed to be puritans?"

Feeling their train slowly roll to a stop at their station, Toji just shrugged at her as they both got up and made a break for the exit before continuing to speak after they left the train together, their shoulders bumping against one another as they squeezed through the crowded train station.

"If I wanted to act like a limp-wrist I'd use Yelp and wear khakis. Aren't you supposed to pretend to be embarrassed so the girl doesn't feel like she's getting creeped on? Or uh, objectified. Or whatever the hell the new-age version of the term is. If you're chill with walking around my house naked then I don't see the point in freaking out about it."

"Arrgh! Toji! Why are we going out to get me clothing if your decency isn't acting up!" Toji tilted his glasses down to give her one heck of a stare at that one.

"Because I don't enjoy the thought of me being all snuggled up in my neet-dome on a cold winter night while my best friend's shivering her tits off on a cold street corner? What, you thought this was over me being a prude?"

Well, he doesn't really react much to her running around, and certainly didn't act like a mischievous gooner up to no good so… kinda?

"You know I can handle the cold, no problem! As long as I'm not walking on ice, or stuck in the snow, or uh… out on a really windy day…"

Alright, maybe she did need an actual costume. To stop the wind, if nothing else. It's not like anyone could ever prove she wasn't wearing the costume…

Besides Toji Kayama, of course. God bless him and his creeper peepers.

"Listen, this probably won't go anywhere and we can just call it a wash and go eat somewhere decent. It'll be on me. I released a shitty phone game yesterday I made in like, six hours so I probably have at least twenty bucks by now. I based it off those shitty ice fishing ads I used to see on tumblr, so I know it'll get someone."

This dude had two centuries worth of shit to rip off and he chose ice fishing ads?! What the fuck was her bestie smoking, and why haven't his doctor's picked it up on his tests yet?!

"Hmm… I feel like I'm the one that should be paying for lunch, since you just kinda got accepted into U.A. early… Apparently!" Not that she didn't believe him. His mom worked at the school and she had seen the bullshit he could code if he actually put some work in. She could totally believe Toji was U.A. material.

But still, it was pretty weird to think that he friend just… did that! Just woke up the other day and went 'guess I'm gonna go get an education now' and clinched it out before the day was even over. She guessed he at least fit the school motto. Plus Ultra, indeed!

The conversation passed pretty quickly after that, a majority of their attention taken up by trying not to run each other off the sidewalk as they repeatedly drifted into one another throughout their revolving door of a conversation that neither one of them even realized they had reached the support shop until Toji's phone let out a cheerful tune.

"Hmm… bad news Toji; I think Selfie sent you their home address by accident." Staring up at the modern suburban home her friend's direction had dragged them to, it took Toru several seconds of searching before she noticed the neon pink sign in the window that read 'Lightly Labs~ (make sure to make it fully capitalized!)'.

Alright, at least that was kind of adorable. Maybe Toji had the right place after all? Trailing behind Toji as he walked up to the garage by the house and raised his hand to knock on the door, Toru felt herself getting blown back onto her rear as something slammed into Toji and pushed him back into her chest as they landed in the shallow snowbank a foot or so away from the doorway.

Maybe it was just because Toru was used to heavy objects crashing into her and sending her flying, but she almost didn't mind having to wrap herself around her friend as she caught him like a lead football. It felt kind of nice being able to help him out for a change.

Looking around Toji's shoulder at the person that was now lying atop the both of them, Toru's gaze was immediately drawn to the cute girl that was their age currently straddling Toji's hips with a soot stained grin, Toru felt a flash of frustration roll through her at this.

She didn't question the feeling all that much; clearly she was just jealous of her bestie for managing to hog the lap-stealer all to himself! Why was Toji always the one having all the baddies falling into his lap?!

Pulling her stained google up to her pink dreads with a raucous laugh, the cross-hair eyed woman just smiled down at Toji with a wide grin and made absolutely no attempts to pick herself off his lap.

"Hahaha, thanks for breaking my fall! Hey, by any chance are you the guy that was emailing me yesterday? Because if you are then good news, I just got finished with my last project! It exploded and sent me flying right into my next project, funny how that work GrrKKk-!"

Welp, Toru guessed the pink haired girl finally knocked her bestie's shades off of his face, if her slowly rolling off of him like an electrified squirrel to twitch face-first in the snowbank next to them was anything to go by.

Feeling her friend pick himself off of her and grab her hands to pull her up, the both of them turned to stand above the still-twitching girl with salmon dreadlocks as she worked through 'pain at first sight' with Toji.

"… Dude, I'm pretty sure I could throw a hobo in a snowbank and they wouldn't make it change color. How is this girl so filthy?" Toru didn't know, but what she did know was she was now jealous of a pile of snow.

Scratching the back of his head as he stared down at the twitching girl (and making no move to help), Toji just shrugged across the sidewalk at her and gestured to the open road with a tilt of his head.

"Ehh… maybe we should just call this a wash and go to that barbecue place you mentioned earlier? I mean, do you really want a costume made by some filthy hobo girl?"

Yes. Toru was positive that this exact person was the only support gear tech she wanted handling her junk.

"Oh come on, Toji! Us just being here already made this stinky girl touch water for a few seconds! We're basically heroes! Which is a good thing, since villains kind of can't go to U.A. They'll explode like vampires entering a church!"

Pulling the pink haired girl out of the snowbank, Toru wasn't afraid to admit that the smile she shot at the girl Toji had brought down to the pavement with a side eye grew a bit brittle as the pinkette moved around her with a laugh to glomp onto her bestie.

"Hahaha, W-O-W! Anyone ever tell you how mean your glare is? Oh man, that felt just like the first time I touched a live wire by accident… how nostalgic! Can you do that again?! You know, with eyes like that I bet you need some googles. Well, I am happy to tell you that Lightly Labs specializes in ALL-!"

Holding up his hands with a nervous laugh, Toji tried pushing the girl away from him and towards herself as he shook his head back and forth, still trying to keep his glasses on his face.

"Right, I'm suddenly starting to realize why mum told me to swing by this place. Listen, I'm already going to U.A. so I'm good on gizmos and gadgets and whatchamacallits. Not that I'd accept one from them, I'd rather not look like the X-Men's punching bag."

To the filthy garage gremlin's credit, she could at least keep the conversation rolling from Toji cutting through the center of it and hitting her with a big fat NO. Too bad her conversation wasn't entirely based in reality…

"Oh, right! The U.A. support course only makes gear for hero students! You probably can't get them to make you anything. But don't worry, because you've got Mei Hatsume standing right in front of you, and she can make anything! … And by she, I mean me!"

"… Holy shit, there's two of them…"

Placing his face into the palms of his hands, Toru watched on from her spot on the sidewalk as her bestie suffered mild ego-death while still standing in front of Mei, who was already back to poking and prodding at her friend's… everything, really.

"Hmm, you feel a bit soft, but your quirk seems good and you've got a pretty face. As far as I care you're already halfway to being a pro! Come on, are you sure you don't want some googles and maybe a jetpack or two? I bet I can even help you climb out of the nosebleeds and kick it with the pros! Stick with Lightly Labs; we'll guide the way!"

"Alright, that's a cute motto. It doesn't really change the fact that I'm not interested in any support gear, but credit where it's due. Also, I'm a support student. Or will be, at least. Can you go poke and prod Toru instead?"

As much as Toru appreciated him trying to get a cute stinky girl to glomp onto her side, watching Toji's cortisol levels rise with every word Mei ignored was funny enough that she was willing to look past her simmering jealously at being the lone gal left out of the glomp fest.

"Wait, you're a support student? Why don't you just make your friend some support gear under the table in your own lab? Are you a stickler or something? Just say it's a failed project and sweep it under the table! I mean, going to me is the smart choice, but can't you make dumb choices all on your own?"

"I'm not really a support student yet, I just got accepted in a bit early. And even if I was I don't know anything that would help make Toru some decent threads. I specialize in programming and computer science, not-"

That was about all Toji managed to get out before Mei pounced on him a second with with a gleeful shriek, the words 'computer science' all it took to send the mechanic into a blood frenzy.

---

To Toru's great surprise, Toji eventually decided to bring Mei along with them to lunch to 'talk over business'. You know, as if they were all seasoned adults with plans and motives and not just three dumb teens that just pushed each other in a snowbank for twenty minutes.

She's a bit surprised that Mei actually listened when her bestie told her she needed to take a shower if she wanted free food though. If someone looked at her and said the dreaded 'Eww, stinky' she would have probably barricaded herself in her bedroom and not come out except to attend her own funeral.

Sitting beside her besting and blocking any interlopers from invading their side of the booth with her invisible roadblocker of a rump, Mei finally finished wrapping up her one-sided talk with Toji about how nice it was to 'talent hunt before the talent was even in season' (whatever that was supposed to mean) and finally began to speak to her… While still staring right at Toji. Hmm.

"So, Toru! You're in luck, and not just because Toji's paying for our food. I like to consider myself a bit of a savant when it comes to being perfect, so trust me when I say that your suit is going to be perfect! I know what you're already thinking; 'I've already been to a dozen specialists, why does this squeaky clean genius think she is?' Well, I'll tell you!"

Looking up from his menu with a dry laugh, Toji hit Mei with one hell of a side eye from his spot in the booth as he crinkled his nose at her.

"Dude, I'm pretty sure squeaky clean people use soap. The shampoo falling off your head and down your back doesn't count."

Well, Toru guessed she wasn't the only one that still picked up on the continued existence of the pinkette's locker room miasma that had managed to stick around even after Toji browbeat her into washing the five layers of soot and grease off of herself.

"Sorry, but even the great Mei Hatsume has her limits! Every time I try using soap my skin feels like it's two sizes too small and made out of dried wood. Be glad I even did this much to go along with this talent meet-up!"

Sighing hard enough that she's pretty sure a small chunk of his soul left his body, Toji stared up at the lightbulb hanging above them before slowly breaking into an amused chortle.

"Oh my God, this is actually going to be what the rest of my life defaults to…Pfft…" Looking back down at his menu, Toru was happy to see that he was at least smiling at whatever just made his brainstem snap as Mei began to rev up again.

"Hmph, rude! Anyways, like I was saying- what makes me better than all these withered diploma mill husks you visited and beat the hope and spirit out of your body with tire irons, you may ask? Easy! Because I've already done it! Back in July the U.A. labs released some research about how to create synthetic fibers that can mimic certain types of quirks when made with the user's mitochondrial dna, and I was one of the first labs that jumped on the new research for customers. What, you think you're the first person that noticed that Mirio kid on TV during the U.A. Festival?"

Thrumming her blocky fingers against the table to forcefully drag her eyes off of her bestie and towards the spot she sat at, Toru shot her a smile and tried to think about how to politely say the thoughts bouncing around her skull.

"I gotta admit, I kinda skipped out on watching the last one. This is all mostly Toji's idea. No offense, but this all kind of sounds too good to be true. You just conveniently have the exact tech already prepped for use that just came out. Doesn't it usually take a while for that kind of tech to trickle down to us normies?"

The conversation had to be put on hold for a bit after that as their waiter swung by with their drinks, a majority of the table's focus given to stacking up the bill.

Toru wasn't sure how much Toji made from his shitty ice fishing phone game, but whatever amount he earned from it was apparently enough to make him say 'order whatever you want and we can order it again to take the rest home on our way out', so she was going to take him up on that. She wasn't sure why he made the same offer to Mei in spite of looking absolutely annoyed with her since they had met, but whatever.

"Right, where was I? Oh, right! First off, of course I have the exact thing you need! At Lightly Labs, there is no corner beyond our vision! Just like light itself, we're always moving forward at blinding speed and always at the forefront of vision! And second off, we aren't normies. You're a hero hopeful and we're two support engineers! Or at least, we're gonna be!"

She wasn't going to lie, Mei's words actually managed to get to her a little bit there. Maybe it was because she was a pretty future-oriented girl, but Toru had never taken a moment to think to herself about how she would see herself five years in the past.

The thought that a regular outing between her, her bestie, and some musky gremlin she had just met would be looked back on as the first meeting between three industry juggernauts was… well, it was a nice thought.

And then her bestie came in swinging with the steel chair and the iron reality check.

"Right, let me guess- you don't want me to pay you to make this suit for us, you want me to help you with a few software related jobs. I'm sure these suits are worth a decent chunk of cash."

Clicking her tongue at Toji with a wry grin, Mei shot him with two finger guns as her eyes zeroed in on his own.

"Bang! First shot, first bullseye! You got into U.A's support course on recommendation, and on a pretty neglected field at that! That's not exactly something that just happens. At least, not something that happens to idiots. I'm sure helping me tie off a couple projects would be better than spending a bunch of money just to buy a suit for your friend. It's a good deal, amirite?"

Maybe it was because she was the one doing zero work and getting a hundred percent of the reward, but she thought that was actually a pretty good deal. It probably helped that Toji could code more in an hour than most people could do in a week.

Their waiter finally returned at that point, and the conversation was quickly abandoned as they all swapped and argued over which dish went to which person. Taking a few minutes break to actually start demolishing the plates in front of them, Toji was eventually the first one to speak as he tore into the American style sausage on his plate.

"Shit, this place has really good Texan food. Good choice of a place to eat, Toru. So, Mei… I thought about your offer. Sorry, but 'do an unspecified amount of unpaid labor in exchange for an under the table product' ain't exactly the deal of the century. No dice. Be glad you made the offer to me instead of my brother, he would've folded you like an omelette for trying that grift."

That was the first thing Toji had managed to say that night that actually blew the wind out of Mei's sails. Slumping in her seat slightly, Mei rubbed the back of her neck as she stared across the table at them.

"Oh. I guess this kind of sounds like a scam when you say it like that. Sorry. I wasn't trying to set you up for a trick or anything, I was just going to try… you know, networking a bit. I'm planning on going to U.A. as well, you're already locked into the course with a friend trying to be a hero."

Cutting into the smoked red sausage surrounded by grilled bell peppers and onions with a calm hum over the loud clatter of the restaurant around them, Toji made no attempt to stop her from stealing the piece off his plate to try herself as he stared up at Mei with a smile. She knew Toji well enough to know it was as fake as a plastic apple.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to accuse you of anything. It was just the vibe I was starting to get, that's all. I don't have an issue with hanging out with you before school starts up or doing a skill trade or two, I just want any deals we make to be concrete is all. None of that 'oh, just one more project' shit. We can figure out the exact number later along with all the other numbers, if you're still interested."

Looking down at the honey-spice brisket meal in front of herself, Toru managed to work her way through a sizable chunk of the buttery jalapeno cornbread before Mei picked up enough wind to go back to talking her bestie's ear off.

"Yes! I mean- yes, you're right. If we're going to be co-engineers, we need to do things right! I can figure out what kind of projects you doing would be worth the suit, and then we can… maybe do some more projects together from there? U.A. is still a few months away, after all!"

Damn, as far as Toru was concerned this was basically a perfect end to how the day could've gone. Toji got her a pair of pants, she got some free food, and she got to eat dinner with a cute musky girl. Honestly, what more could she ask for?

"Sure, that sounds good for me as well. We can talk it over after you're done getting Toru's measurements for her costume. That's probably not something I should be in the area for."

Toru's life was fucking awesome.

 

[SiegfriedisPower]

The psychopath subordinate and the amoral mad scientist? It makes a brother proud.

 

[MarcusDeGabriel]

Love that he's going to be a Support Student, but honestly can't think of a ton of stuff that would require his specific focus.

 

[CosmicBigfoot]

Love that he's going to be a Support Student, but honestly can't think of a ton of stuff that would require his specific focus.

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The software quirk is actually insanely broad. Even microwaves require software to run nowadays. Hardware vs software is basically "building a car that can drive" vs "building a car that will drive". Don't let Toji's laziness fool you, his quirk has cursed him to always be the group project bicycle no matter what they're working on.

 

[HGieokk]

"Cute musky girl" ummmm alright Toru. You're kinda a freak but you go, girl! Get that ass.

 

[BloodFartMoon]

"Sure, that sounds good for me as well. We can talk it over after you're done getting Toru's measurements for her costume. That's probably not something I should be in the area for."

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Brother just look at her and your quirk will give them to you.

Looking around Toji's shoulder at the person that was now lying atop the both of them, Toru's gaze was immediately drawn to the cute girl that was their age currently straddling Toji's hips with a soot stained grin, Toru felt a flash of frustration roll through her at this.

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At times like i curse you and your wntire bloodline for not having this in the NSFW forum

 

[CosmicBigfoot]

Brother just look at her and your quirk will give them to you.

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And let his bro Toru miss out on a measuring session with her stinky steampunk clone? Toji knows you gotta give a few gifts during December.

 

[2 Hot Crown Subdues the Sinful]

"Sorry, but even the great Mei Hatsume has her limits! Every time I try using soap my skin feels like it's two sizes too small and made out of dried wood. Be glad I even did this much to go along with this talent meet-up!"

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Musashi also had a skin condition that made him avoid bathing.

 

[Lumiere_DB]

Peak as always. Thank you for the chapter.

 

[CosmicBigfoot]

Musashi also had a skin condition that made him avoid bathing.

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"No, Mei, you don't get it. You're dishonoring Miyamoto Musashi every time you don't use organic bar soap. I swear, Musashi would have killed a hundred men for a single bar of soap made with jojoba oil. I swear the soap is good for you."

Click to shrink...

 

[Azzy Rael]

Mei is gonna get hosed with soapy water.

 

[Wretcheddskyz]

Kinda weird you make every single female character a lesbian it seems like

 

[2 Hot Crown Subdues the Sinful]

jojoba

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View: https://youtu.be/0WwnB9dmx8E?si=Nah5Rs4kHxmCQ4z5&t=23
Pink Hair = Pink Panther

 

[CosmicBigfoot]

Kinda weird you make every single female character a lesbian it seems like

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First rule of fiction: Everyone is bisexual until proven otherwise. Also, I'm not really sure where I wrote Mei being a lesbian in the chapter. I wrote this while blitzed so I could've genuinely just added in an entire lesbian tension scene and forgotten tbh. I know Nemuri's only tried flirting with a nurse so far, but that's because she's a fiend and flirting with a nurse while going to see your kid at the hospital is quintessential fiend behavior. Just like how flirting with a hunk bodyguard while your kid's out swimming would be fiendish. Unfortunately it's now December in the story, and all the hunks have moved south for the winter.

 

[Winged One]

"I guess? I feel like I got in less on merit and more on a lunchables raffle system. You know, like the Vietnam war."

While Toru's sure an American a century in the past would've loved to hear a random teenage kid say that while on public transportation,

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I don't get it.