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SHINOBI: The RPG - Act 2 (Naruto/Fallout SI)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Fulcon, May 7, 2019.

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  1. Kalaong

    Kalaong Not too sore, are you?

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    ...Is Hisako ever going to discover that Daisuke was trying to do exactly that and Konoha's leadership was sabotaging him specifically so they could control him through his only weakness? She'd understand why he was so mad at the village at that point.
     
    Last edited: Jul 5, 2019
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  2. MMMm

    MMMm Know what you're doing yet?

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    Man, I'm really glad Daisuke didn't go with Hisako. That was a terribly unhealthy relationship. The Anko one really could have stood for her actually getting some help for the years of emotional wounds she's been carrying from Orochimaru abandoning her and possibly getting her to help in his experiments. But in the end it doesn't really matter, because Ninshu.

    My main issue is that people treated his social problem like a problem. Can't you like a guy regardless of the fact that he's not good with people? It's no different than having a friend on the autism spectrum. He was strong, he was kind AND he was very, very effective. He won fights, he saved kids, and yet people never let his "problem" go. Why did it matter so much to them? Why did they always have to try to change him? He was never good enough in their eyes.

    But his teammates NEVER gave him a break, despite the fact that he didn't retaliate against them. Daisuke didn't seem to experience anger like a normal person unless his progress in leveling was being interfered with, so he didn't say some choice, vicious words to them.

    Like how shinobi like them who have no special talents or abilities basically only exist to take a kunai for better ninjas. Or that they're all utterly irrelevant before him. Or that they're just destined to be generic shinobi who fall into the background and both of them are unlikely to ever surpass Kakashi, let alone actually become S rank ninja.

    Kid Kakashi or Neji would have just tore them a new asshole every chance they got if they tried half the shit they did with Daisuke.

    But no, he didn't have an ego, he didn't act like an asshole, and he wasn't especially arrogant. And they KNEW he didn't have any friends besides Naruto. But they always selfishly thought about their own feelings all the time.

    Man oh man are they lucky Daisuke wasn't actually a sociopath and he's capable of caring about the people around him.
     
  3. Kalaong

    Kalaong Not too sore, are you?

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    Gah. I'm always so confused when I start picking up likes for a multi-response post. Never know which one is making the impact unless someone else quotes it.
    My answer to that question is; "Because it has a historical basis." One with consequences that plague us to this very day; the "Chicks Dig Jerks" concept. In any setting where large groups of males and females interact, it seems inevitable that a large number of healthy, attractive females will be aggressively pursuing a small number of wealthy and/or dominant males; this is supported by the Trivers-Willard hypothesis: females in poor conditions have more female than male children, while females in comfortable conditions have more male than female children. Thus, the children of comfortable(IE wealthy) parents always have their choice of females to impregnate. While in modern times such children are from less outright "bad" origins, in pre-industrial times that meant the children of warlords. And females that submitted to them were more likely to be placed in comfortable conditions to bear males.

    So the fantasy of multiple healthy, attractive females aggressively pursuing a shy, introverted and often intellectual male has an obvious fanbase. Not really any different from changeling fantasies where the shy introvert is unknowing royalty or a superpowered mutant.

    Of course, any real adult knows they're all equally unlikely, but we can't help but dream...

    Especially in light of this;
    [​IMG]
    Ergo, a majority of humans alive today are descended from sleaze, thugs or outright rapists, simply as a result of statistics; people who use and abuse numerous women have more kids than monogamists who are devoted to a single woman.

    As a result, we're genetically conditioned to find jerks appealing lovers and leaders. Women want them, men want to follow them.

    And some men and women wish it wasn't true. While many of society's elite continue to exploit and benefit from it.
     
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  4. Fulcon

    Fulcon Not working on it anymore. Sorry.

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    It does. It just annoys me that it does.

    I'm really just following the characters, I haven't planned all that much.

    Thank you!

    *nods nods*

    I could definitely see this in the future. Not sure when, but someday.

    #1: Yeah, it's Daisuke's other head talking. He doesn't want to listen to the other head.

    #2: What makes you say that (if its something I said, forgive me for being dense)?

    It's very possible. In fact, I'd say it's pretty likely at this point.

    And its a good answer. Thank you, have a cookie. :)

    Ninshu didn't heal the wounds, it just brought greater awareness of them.

    At least, that was my interprutation. Feel free to debate me on this.

    #1: His terrible charisma turned him into something of a hatesink.

    #2: Because everyone was afraid that he'd kill them once he became aware of their faults.

    That's part of why they never gave him a break - he never stood up for himself or asserted that he was the way he was and that they should accept it.

    Thats hurtful. :(

    Because they knew how to stand up for themselves.

    I think this is mostly my own personal failure as a writer - I never intended to write them as selfish idiots. They just came out that way...that and it felt right, for some reason.

    This is true.

    Double-post, my friend. ;)
     
  5. MMMm

    MMMm Know what you're doing yet?

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    Wow, they really thought so little of the guy? He never showed any aggression to the people in the village. Why's was he getting the Gaara treatment?

    Murderous Daisuke was essentially a duelist. If he came across someone who attacked with the intent to kill, he'd kill them. Both participants agreed to have a fight to the death. He never went after people who didn't show aggression first.

    What made them think he was going to snap and betray everyone? It's a bit extreme, too.

    "My teammates and some people in the village acted like assholes to me. Welp, guess I'll kill them all in cold blood."

    It's really sad they'd think that of him. Naruto never went on a killing spree and he's dealt with crap all his life.

    I mean I can understand him getting super pissed at Hiruzen after he rescued the clan heirs from the monsters. If I did that mission, I'd expect to get a medal of honor and for all the parents to come bow down to me and thank me for saving their precious children. Instead he got punished for not waiting for people who are utterly inferior to him on a time sensitive mission where every second could cost lives.

    Yeah, lets wait for backup that's all weaker than me. The Academy is filled with chuunin and they couldn't do a damn thing. If scores of Academy instructors couldn't keep the kids from getting snatched, anyone but an elite jounin wouldn't be any use.

    But still not really worth murdering anyone over.

    Part of what gets people stuck psychologically is that they're only actually capable of experiencing their own point of view. We use words to explain our reasoning, but it's always a battle to get people to understand. If you link your mind to someone else and think about your thoughts and memories, you can experience how another person would perceive these things. It could be a massive breakthrough because you realize that it was your own bad thinking that kept you stuck. That what happened wasn't as big of a deal as you thought or that you're not really a terrible person.

    Someone could say those words to you, but when you can truly experience their feelings, it's genuine. It's honest. It's real. So Anko's exposure to a different perspective on the Orochimaru situation and presumably their future side quest to remove the cursed seals from all his victims and finally kill him for good would help her recover faster than years of therapy.
     
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  6. Miestwin

    Miestwin Monster on the outside, bishoujo on the inside

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    It's like you said, Anko does this only as a precaution for Daisuke leaving her.
    She wants another girl either as an "anchor" to make Daisuke stay "when he finally stop loving her", or as a method of slowly easing herself down to the tought, he now prefers someone else.
     
  7. Kalaong

    Kalaong Not too sore, are you?

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    Weeell, as far as 99% of the village knows, something like that actually happened recently QED the Uchiha Massacre. And the real reason it happened is because +90% of the victims were planning to do it themselves.

    Anyone here ever read Garth Ennis' The Boys? That's an exploration of what would possibly happen if the same kind of people who published comic books created superhumans for the exact same reason they published comic books - to make money by selling oversimplified and titilating entertainment; Sociopathic hedonism, practiced by human WMDs.

    In a similar vein, Masashi Kishimoto's Naruto could be considered an exploration of what would possibly happen if humans with both hereditary and trained superpowers acted as mercenaries in a feudal society; Obsession with bloodlines, hoarding of knowledge, wars started and fueled solely to provide a market for said superhuman mercenaries.
     
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  8. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Not too sore, are you?

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    Good for you Sakura. Getting an upbringing that didn't have you in a mental bubble actually let you channel your intelligence into being an observant, caring individual. Less prone to running with the temper too.

    Similarly Hisako has graduated from seclusion to resentment for anyone involved in her negative situation. Not a good look. The meeting with Katsuki should help.... or blow up entertainingly. Alternatively both. Both is viable.

    Ino probably has the overall healthiest reaction to all this, but Hinata makes a good second place for not emotionally harming anyone besides herself. Suboptimal, but in that overall above average way that makes you wish the best for her. Wonder what you'll do with her? Have Naruto follow Daisuke's general relationship blueprint? Have her find someone else? Have her heal/mitigate her various hangups using friendship before pursuing someone else?

    Just in case I wasn't clearly AYAME isn't in the running for best reaction to getting dumped, because she never even saw it as something to be pursued. She's clearly acting best, but wasn't hit as hard as everyone unless she's VERY good at acting.

    Also I can totally support an Uchiha interlude. We've multiple different groups with relevant perspectives. Itachi's reaction when he finally learns all this can only be the purest gold. Also Obito, but we already covered that.
     
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  9. Fulcon

    Fulcon Not working on it anymore. Sorry.

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    It's more along the lines of 'it's what I would do in his position'.

    Maybe this is my bias showing, but perhaps they didn't have much experience dealing with someone who is a duelist since, well, fighting only when agreed on is kind of strange.

    This is true.

    This makes a lot of sense. Thank you. :)

    *nods nods*

    True enough.

    Sakura is bae.

    Both is very viable.

    Hm...I have a few plans, but nothing concrete. Yet.

    Nope, not hit hard at all.

    I'm getting more and more behind this idea every second.
     
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  10. Kalaong

    Kalaong Not too sore, are you?

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    Honestly, everything else is 110% awesome, so I've been trying as hard as I can to ignore this plot element.
    Naruto canon is the only work I know of where not only do the nice guy and girl brush off the tsundere and the emo rival in favor of each other(ATLA is the only other work I know of where that happens Kataang4ever), but the tsundere and the emo each get both barrels of karmic buckshot.
    The tsundere marries the emo rival she's been obsessed with since childhood only to feel the harsh slap of reality in that such men make lousy husbands and fathers; The emo occasionally comes home to a house full of strangers, the tsundere ends up a de facto single mother to a child who's so confused by the whole mess she holds serious doubts that the tsundere is actually her biological mother.
    On top of that, the hero gets the opposite; a happy home life with a loving partner, and together they raise relatively stable children, their escapades limited to typical low-scale teenage rebellion instead of family-threatening crises.

    It's actually why I picked up the series only after it finished its run; tsunderes and emos annoy the hell out of me, and I find it satisfying to see them get some of what they dish out.
     
    Last edited: Jul 5, 2019
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  11. Fulcon

    Fulcon Not working on it anymore. Sorry.

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    Aw...I thought I was getting Sakura to develop out of being a Tsundere that punches people. :(

    Ten internet cookies on Sakura not actually being the mom.

    This is true.
     
  12. Kalaong

    Kalaong Not too sore, are you?

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    Eh. Canon doesn't give Sakura much to work with besides temper, obsession, and multiple personalities. It doesn't help that her parents are part of the generation that went full-bore "Kids, shun the Demon Naruto" either.

    OTOH, Hinata has always been adorable - though her attentions toward Naruto are vaguely stalker-ish, she was supportive every chance she got and never went yandere about it - and her life goal of un-screwing her screwed-up clan is very easy to empathize with.
     
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  13. Kalaong

    Kalaong Not too sore, are you?

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    And it doesn't hurt that I think every relatively stable family has had adorable/annoying days like this one;

    Big Brother: Leave the toy here! I don't wanna end up having to carry it home!
    Little Sister: I'll carry it!
    Big Brother: I always end up carrying it!
    Little Sister: Do not!
    Big Brother: Do too!
    Toy: (breaks)
    Big Brother: :oops:
    Little Sister: :mad:
    Chaos: (ensues)
     
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  14. RichardWhereat

    RichardWhereat Aia airëa Fëanáro.

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    I'm just hoping his marriage with Anko doesn't survive the lack of trust fight they'll have, and he gets together with Ayame. OTP.
     
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  15. Kalaong

    Kalaong Not too sore, are you?

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    Part of the gag is that the alternative was the closest thing Duckbutt had to a friend while he was on emo walkabout, and supposedly was Pinky's midwife. Bonus points; she's Naruto's only living relative and shares many of his personality traits - the closest thing canon has to the stereotypical slap-slap-kiss behavior is Duckbutt and Naruto(ALL OF THE NOPE), and one of the funniest moments in the early series is that Naruto actually stole Emo Duckbutt's first kiss! Followed closely by the fangirl swarm having a screaming freakout at witnessing this. It seems the author set out to stab the "bad boy" archetype in the heart with a rusty chainsaw.
     
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  16. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Not too sore, are you?

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    Oh relax Fulcon. Some people aren't as familiar with the spectrum of fanwork, specifically that which curbs some of the more toxic/infuriating character quirks, and thus will carry attitudes about canon characters into the work even knowing damn well it's not warranted.

    Like Sakura hate, or memetic Naruto diplomacy, or in one particularly silly event all the hate for Danzo in this one fic I forgot the name of ages ago where he was the GOOD GUY in the Hiruzen Danzo Duo. Hiruzen just had good PR.

    Moral of this story is that I've seen some THINGS, and some STUFF, and some THING INVOLVING STUFF! Also that you shouldn't worry about it.
     
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  17. Kalaong

    Kalaong Not too sore, are you?

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    I know that, I just think it's hilarious that Sasuke's daughter spent a not-insignificant amount of time believing she was the result of an affair with what's essentially a female Naruto.
     
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  18. Dr.StrangeLove

    Dr.StrangeLove Experienced.

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    Hmhh.I wonder how much of a Power Boost Sasuke and Itachi will get from their emotions (since apparently Uchihas are a group of reskinned Hulks that become stronger because their brains,in response to ANY strong emotions create a special type of chakra that makes their normal chakra harder better fase stronger and evolve their Sharingans)as a result of Daisuke.

    Oh and Sasuke now is a ticking bomb waiting to blow up.When he is done with his family he is going to want to find out why everything with The Uchihas extermination happened.
     
  19. MMMm

    MMMm Know what you're doing yet?

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    He snapped in canon because he murdered his "innocent" brother and lived a lie of a life. He wanted to kill Danzo and the elders, but had an apparent breakdown and decided to murder every last man, woman and child in Konoha.

    Here, he hasn't awakened the mangekyo sharingan nor did he go through with killing his brother. His mother is also back with him. And Danzo is already dead.
     
  20. Dr.StrangeLove

    Dr.StrangeLove Experienced.

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    My ticking bomb comment was more for Sasuke developing revolutionary tendencies and not for becoming a sociopath.
    Because while it's true that Sasuke wanted to kill everyone in Konoha,after he chilled the f**k up for a moment and asked for the reasons that led to the Uchiha massacre,he figured out that the Hidden Village system was garbage and wanted to find a solution.
     
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  21. MMMm

    MMMm Know what you're doing yet?

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    Maybe he'll join Daisuke's ninshu revolution then.
     
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  22. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Not too sore, are you?

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    Just gonna point out that there were many things that fucked up Sasuke's mental state in canon. Constantly given less overall attention than, and looked down as second best as compared to, his brother. The events of the massacre, and being forced to watch those events in glorious mangekyo HD by same brother. EVERYONE in the village putting him on a pedestal, and the effects it will have on a small child as he grows up. Sorta like the last, but being constantly stalked with romantic attention from people he has no interest in.

    Getting the mind fucking curse seal. Feeling the perceived inferiority to the closest thing he had to a brother at the time, Naruto, thus likely tripping some irrational Itachi flags for the parallel. UPGRADING the mind fucking curse seal to be more powerful while shattering the influence limiting seal on it. Beating his best friend within an inch of his life, before contemplating killing him.

    Living for THREE YEARS, and some months with an upgraded mind fucking seal. Also Orochimaru. Getting soul violated by Orochimaru, then using the sharingan to reverse the tech sealing Orochimaru in his soul in a manner not completely dissimilar to biju hosts.

    Fighting Itachi to the death. Turns out Itachi wasn't guilty anyway. U mad bro? Yes, very much so. Also changing target. Getting an entirely justified kill on Danzo, but having to betray a teammate in the process. And finally, FINALLY, looking at the entire system during the war and deciding to burn it down rather than reform. The point? There was a LOT of mind fucking going around, and simplifying it to just one or two things is insultingly reductive.
     
  23. Kalaong

    Kalaong Not too sore, are you?

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    Especially since everything Sasuke went through? Naruto did too, and managed to become a goofball instead of a douchebag.
    Family exterminated? Yup.
    Brain screwed with? At birth, by father, by having demon made of bad vibes sealed into him in such a manner his subconscious manifests it as a giant cage in a sewer in his back brain.
    Let's not forget the whole "childhood as hated outcast" thing. While special special Sasuke was praised by every adult and idolized by everyone in his own generation.

    Some people are just dicks, regardless of their environment. It's in their nature.
     
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  24. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Not too sore, are you?

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    Naruto was also mind fucked, but it was a different KIND of mindfucking resulting in an entirely different set of hangups. Like the inability to trust subordinates to do things on their own combined with being addicted to positive attention leading him to use clones for everything BUT nurturing his son.

    Big difference? Naruto wants attention, and has seen his best success when talking. Sasuke wants no such thing, and has seen his best success with violence.
     
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  25. MMMm

    MMMm Know what you're doing yet?

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    Well the cursed seal stuff didn't happen in this story. And I believe that if Kakashi had offered to help Sasuke get his revenge, he'd have stayed in the village .Sasuke believed he had the choice between getting revenge or being weak with his friends and he decided to be an avenger.

    If he was offered the choice of getting extensive training to become a jounin, then getting a special team to go hunt down Itachi once Sasuke's skills are up to standard, he'd have thought twice about joining the terrorist who assassinated the third Hokage.
     
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  26. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Not too sore, are you?

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    That was never going to happen, as it would require Kakashi to show actual social awareness, and beyond that social cunning.

    Kakashi in early naruto is socially broken war vet who spends most of his time staring at a rock as he gradually opens up to a small group of children. Glacially slowly.
     
  27. Rechte

    Rechte Getting sticky.

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    To paraphrase Butcher: A brain isn't a commodity you can hack away or trade. You are brains, you just have bodies
    Welcome to the club Hinata. We're expecting another member once Naruto's kohai shows up and breaks a heart
    ... I somehow feel we're reading different stories since as far as I can remember, his actual friends do like him for him. Hell, Hisako actually asks him to be him instead of "brainwashing himself with a genjutsu", aka the kimono thing mentioned in the latest chapter
     
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  28. Galacticplumber

    Galacticplumber Not too sore, are you?

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    She fell in love with him when he did that, wanted him to actually work on fixing his problem sooner, and the two things work on similar mechanisms. It's so problematic Fulcon hinted Hisako learning about Konoha forbidding Daisuke from doing that and WHY might be a plot point. If memory serves anyway.
     
    Last edited: Jul 7, 2019
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  29. Krazyfan1

    Krazyfan1 Versed in the lewd.

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    Poor Hinata ;(
     
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  30. llat-2

    llat-2 Verified Smooth Criminal

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    Fulcon if Daisuke and Hisako's parents were to hold a conversation with each other what would and could be said between them? Also were Hisako's parents with apart of the anbu squad that Daisuke smacked around? Would Hisako's parents rather not talk to Daisuke? Also the Anbu that held Daisuke at knife point would they try that again if they knew that Daisuke would not be as tolerant of that?
     
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