My Light Novel Isekai Story is Stressful As Expected (Eiyuu Senki Friend Insert ft. NekoNekoBoy)

Chapter 16: Highway to Hell

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There are many things to think when you’re going into a memory but I didn’t expect to fade away into a brand new scene.

I was like a dreamer who had gained lucidity, though my mind was still in the fog. One moment, the world was white. The next?

The next moment I was staring at an old scene from who knows how long, a porch of the place I called home gazing off into a winter wonderland as two people stared out into the distance. Two people which my eyes had immediately known.

Himiko and Yamato, silently gazing at the world with only the warmth of some tea to keep them company. Himiko was clearly dressed for winter, wearing thicker clothes than usually but Yamato stood the same as I had last saw her.

I wanted to scream, I wanted to yell, to move, to do anything to join the two but I couldn’t. My body was in a paradox, firmly in place but light as a feather and I all I could do was watch as the scene was slowly painted brown before it truly came to life and suddenly I felt like I was standing in an old photograph.

...Heh, I’m Charlie Bone.

“The world is about to be enveloped in darkness. I don’t understand what it is, but the day it happens is not far off. Likely, while we’re still alive...I must unite the will of the people of this world. Before darkness covers this world, faster than anyone.” The young miko sighed somberly. “They won’t believe my words. My divination will be dismissed as mere babbling. And there may be only few who would cooperate. But it’s something I have to do. This is no time to continue those minor quarrels.”

Yamato didn’t even hesitate to answer, and I already knew what her next words would be. “Then I’ll believe in you.”

“...Really? If you stick around with someone like me, people will think you’re strange.”

“You gave me a place to belong. As long as your will remains in this place, then I shall pledge my power to you.“ She kneeled, placing her sword to her chest. “Himiko, Queen of Yamatai. I declare it here and now. Swearing in the name of Yamato Takeru, I shall become your sword and shield. Don’t forget Himiko, my heart is always with you.”

Er… I’m just going to ignore that.

“...Thank you, Takeru. I’m...so happy.” Himiko smiled, seemingly truly happy for the first time in ages.
Yamato and Himiko both had told me before but… I don’t think I ever truly understood how lonely the girl who was frequently called my sister actually was.

How long was she like that?

====

The scene was gone far sooner than I expected it and suddenly I found myself back in the alleyway, and everything around me seemed to be hell. The ground was on fire, my armour was cracked and on fire, the alleyway wasn’t an alley way anymore because whoop-de-fucking-do it was on fire.

But here I was, standing in the middle of this chaos almost perfectly fine beyond the bleeding I had mere minutes ago. In fact, I almost actually felt stronger than ever. So I put my new found strength into something I was good at, lifting my middle finger up and pointing it towards the sky. “I lived bitch.”

“Y-You...How can you survive in my flames?!” The False Yamato (who I’m going to need to rename because fuck you she doesn’t deserve to be called it) exclaimed in shock,.“They should have rendered you to ash instantly!”

“Because fuck you that’s how!” Let’s see this monster should be called - Oh hey it’s the name only one letter off. “But wow, I didn’t expect the purple haired cunt who literally sets fires to countries for her own glory to actually have any emotions beyond apathy. The more you know~”

She gritted her teeth. “Then I’ll cut you down again! This time I shall take your life!”

“Hahaha.” I chuckled before an evil grin burned it’s way onto my face through the flames, as I dropped the broken Totsuka and pulled my soon to be former sword-club into my hands. “Just fucking try.”

With a roar of anger the monster charged at me, not even bothering with the fire as her sword seemingly blazed a trail on it’s own in it’s aim to cut me down. Unfortunately for her, I was faster and with a quick little charge of my arm I slammed the blade in the opposite direction, knocking her off balance. “Pfft, are you trying to fight or are you trying to do an impression of a tree because those are some real frail branches you got there.”

“You..!” She growled. “That swordsmanship… it’s just like my own?! Who are you?! Absurd...there is no way a mere imitation can protect you against my sword techniques!”

“Who am I? That’s a good question. I once called myself the Man Who Walks The Path Of Heaven but it turns out I was much closer to it than I realized. Nevertheless, I can still say this in regards to your swordsmanship: my teacher once told me that even a master of battle can’t defend if his stance has been undone! That’s when you strike!” My grip on the edge of the blade tightened as the words of my heart spilled out of my lips. “False Hero of Zipang, Yamata! Henceforth...I declare! Swearing on the name of Chen Miyafuji and the dreams of Yamato Takeru, I shall become Himiko’s sword and shield! Kusanagi!! Respond to my call, and release the almighty spirit of the divine!”

And soon the world was bathed in light as the broken shards of the Totsuka seemingly flew into my new sword and melted, the Kusanagi seemingly reforming from it’s tattered state into a completely different blade before my eyes and soon I felt a click as the reforged sword sung with power as it slid out of it’s sheath, bathed in the world anew. The fire at my feet turned into a blaze as it washed away the false flames of the fake, before it rose higher than ever before and stood behind me like a dear old friend.

“The Kusanagi...has chosen a new wielder?” I heard Himiko’s soft voice.

“Flames of divinity, and the Kusanagi...You, have you subdued my sword?!” Yamata shouted in rage and disbelief.

“No dumbass. I’m the successor!” I roared holding the blade up and facing it towards the warrior who was staring at me like I just told her the sky was purple. “Ain’t that right boy?”

The sword vibrated a bit.

“Girl then.”

It vibrated again.

“Fine fine: sword, whatever!” I grumbled, as it seemed appeased. “Sheesh.”

I could almost hear EMIYA’s mocking laughter, shows me for expecting inanimate objects to actually identify as an organic gender.

“Even if you are enveloped in the same divine aura, you are still just a mere boy! You can’t win against me! Come, Servant of Heaven! I shall erase the miracle that dwells within your body! Henceforth, I shall become the God-Slaying Blade! Anything and everything...shall vanish without a trace! Take form, Tsumugari no Tachi!”

The flaming dragons once again burned themselves into the world but no drop of fear wet my heart, instead my blood began to boil as I turned back to Himiko with a grin on my face. “You should really get out of here now, things are about to get hot.”

She looked at me flabbergasted for a moment before nodding with a gulp and running in the opposite direction, not without looking behind her shoulder the whole time at least.

I sighed before turning back to my new sword. “You ready for your first real battle in a long time?”

It actually set itself on fire for me using my Brave.

“Ha! Alrighty then!” My arms moved to point the blade towards the sky before I bowed my head as if in a prayer. “Henceforth, I am the God-Slaying Blade! Any evil on my road I shall purify with no remorse, even if it leads me straight to Hell! Stand by my side, TSUMUGARI NO TACHI!”

My entire body felt as if it were burning as the flames behind me rose up and began to take form until a warrior made of pure fire stood in the same position as me, though towering to the height of the dragons. Something told me that it could have taken the shape of any creature, that I could have made it more flashy than it was but I didn't need flashy. All I needed was myself, and those I had pledged to protect.

Ha, and to think I had once called the Tsumugari No Tachi as just ‘setting your sword on fire and swinging it with all your might'.

Yamata herself didn’t even dignify that with a response, just a bestial roar of unending frustration as she literally flung the dragons at me with her sword. The warrior shadowed me, getting into a stance before slicing any of the foul creatures that reached him with it’s blade. “I can see why you like this technique! I’m having a blast!”

An explosion punctuated my point as one of the dragons tried to fire it’s flames of wrath only to be stopped by a quick blow to the neck before the beam lost it’s form.

That wasn’t intentional I swear.

“You’ve cut my flames…?” After the last dragon was cut down Yamata took a single step back. “A hellfire that would scorch the earth… How can you possess such strength?”

“I’m the Servant of Heaven, I’m the successor of Yamato Takeru, I am wielding the Kusanagi.” I took another step forward. “Take your pick, they all end in the same result.”

“Tch! My power must not have reached its full potential if you’ve been able to resist me this much…” She eyed her own blade, warped and looking ready to melt any second now. “And this. It can’t be helped. I’ll have to withdraw for now. The next time we meet, it’ll be your end…”

Before I could say anything her body started to melt, turning liquid starting from the bottom to the top and pouring into the ground, disappearing.

“Um.” I blinked. “What the fuck.”

“Oni-san, are you alright!?” Once it was clear the danger was over Himiko ran back to me as I still stared at the place Yamata had previously been in.

“Whaaaaaaaa.”

She looked at the spot where the purple haired woman once stood. “Takeru…”

“N-Not Takeru.” I managed out as my head began to ascend to the clouds, or it damn well felt like it did. “Yamato can’t turn into liquid. Tha-That’s Yamata from now on.”

“I...I guess you’re right.” Still, she looked ready to start crying.

“Hey, Hey come here.” I mumbled as I sheathed the Kusanagi and wrapped the poor girl in my arm. “It’s alright, Yamato’s somewhere I’m sure of it. You can cry if you want though, It’s fine.”

Despite the entirely grim situation she smiled. “I would like to, but… I am the Queen of Yamatai. I can’t shed a tear. The mansion, and the city-”

“Stop.” I commanded softly. “I know what it’s like to not be able to cry when you want to so don’t you ever say you can’t shed a tear. You’re the Title, but the Title isn’t you. So you don’t have to hold back, okay?”

She shook her head. “I don’t need to. Everyone is there for me, for us. With all of your support, I can do my best without regrets.”

“That… Must be nice.” I mumbled, closing my eyes a bit.

Ah.

“Onii-chan!”

Oh… Hey… We’re on the ground now.

...Idiot. Her eyes are totally red.

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NNB: Some… Things went down in the middle of writing this chapter. Serious things. Things that made Himiko’s last words hurt a bit.

Alex: It’s more drama than what I intended to. I mean it was inevitable, but still. Need to bring up the comedy to compensate.

 

Chapter 17: Imagine

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The world was white again, a bleak blinding white that seared into your eyes and suffocated you. Space became meaningless in the face of this void as everything and anything was simply nothing.

Except for the chair I was sitting on and the jackass sitting on a much more sophisticated one, book in one hand and a pipe in another. I didn’t even know if that pipe was real but didn’t have time to question it as he looked up from his book with his now bespectacled eyes. “That went as well as could be expected. Congratulations are in order, I suppose.”

“...Do I even want to ask?” I glanced at the book in his hand but the title was incomprehensible. “Is that a real cigar?”

“Not really.” He looked at the object in his hand before slowly waving it back and forth. “Some weird associations started forming after you learned of me, so it’s reflected on my appearance. This whole set-up too. If it bothers you, you only need to define me better.”

“You are now forever upside down.”

And so he was.

“This is not ‘better’. Nowhere close to it.” He sighed, gravity seemingly having no effect on him. “Not that I can even care, I’m you after all. But if you want to spend the time we can stay here experimenting, be my guest.”

Experimenting huh…

“You are now Ilya, Prisma Illya.” I paused before an Idea hit me. “And you care very much about the change in appearance.”

And so he wasn’t.

“Damn I actually thought that’d work.” Er, moving on. “Anyways why’d you call me here?”

“I didn’t. Your body, due to a combination of damage and fatigue, can’t stay awake so your mind has been moved there. Normally you would dream, but those are not normal circumstances.” He explained, resting both book and pipe on his lap. “But if I have to decide a productive use of this opportunity, I would choose to request answers from the very bizarre existence in front of me.”

“...That’s me. Of course that’d be me.” I grumbled. “Wait but if you don’t know the answers then your not me, or you're just a higher power using a piece of me to communicate without driving me insane due to being incomprehensible outside the bounds of even human comprehension. Or something, I don’t know cosmic horror has prepped me to deal with anything fourth dimensional or above as ‘something that’d drive humans insane if they ever glanced at their true form’.”

“As a matter of fact, I do know some answer.” He showed me a smug grin. “But not I’m not a higher power using a roundabout method to communicate with an inferior being. How to put it...I’m both a set of information and the source of your power in this world. Since the latter normally has no sentience, it used your memories to create a fake personality to do things like this conversation we’re having. And for why I look like Counter Guardian Emiya, like I said he is the being that, based on your memories, best define the source of your power.”

“...I’m more than just a sword fighter you know.”

I don’t think I have unlimited blade works on me, that’d just be stupid.

He rolled his eyes. “If it was that I would look like Shirou, not EMIYA. Think of the difference.”

“Snark?” The words came out jokingly from my lips but my eyes were widening as realization hit me like an arrow to the- no I’m not finishing that. EMIYA could tell, the smug grin on his face broadcasted it clear as day as he gestured a ‘go on’ motion with his hands.

Bastard.

“...Counter Force.” I sighed. “You’re the local equivalent of the goddamn Counter Force.”

“Correct.” He removed his glasses and leaned back on his chair. “To be more precise, I’m the embodiment of humanity’s collective positive thoughts, not just their will to survive as a species at all costs.”

Oh my god, he’s the embodiment of the Power of Fr-

“And I know what you’re thinking. Stop that.”

“Aha but you can’t deny it can you?” I waggled my finger before crossing my arms and sighing. “So, what do you want? You got questions right?”

He shook his head again. “Isn’t that something you should say? Aren’t you wondering how and why you ended up in another world, or why were you chosen to be empowered by the local version of the Counter Force? What about the exact details of said ‘empowerment’? You know, important stuff?”

“Great. Answer those questions.” Didn’t even have to ask.

“The current world is shit. Everyone wants it to stop being a shit and for wars to cease making it even more of a shit.” He said, his tone and expression suddenly serious. “This may be a little crude, but it summarizes the situation well. With the will of humanity united in this purpose, the Counter Force acquired the ability to act. It needed an agent: creating one was discarded for some reason, so it was decided to choose an already existing human. Why you, who is not ever from this dimension, I don’t know. Like I said the Counter Force has no sentience, and it cannot even be compared to a computer, so a lot of things are just funky.”

“...Right.” That made sense in a sort of… Paradoxically Nihilistic way, am I even using those words right? “So, moving on to a completely different topic. Yamata, what’s up with her?”

“No idea.” He raised a hand. “I truly don’t know. Whatever happened to her, is outside the scope of humanity’s knowledge. But I can make an educated guess: mind control. Severe mind control.”

“She called herself the Hero of Zipang and spoke as if we were breaking her fate every second Zipang was unified.” So than if it was mind control… “Could she have become some high powers' plaything? Do those even exist- My god.”

Missing for years and coming back with amnesia? “The Yamato I know could’ve had her mind wiped clean when she went missing, that’s why she can’t remember her past.”

If that was true then that opened up so much. Well not really but… There was the jewel. The jewel Himiko found her clutching to dear life for. Could that have been some sort of repressor? If she broke free because of the jewel, tried to run away but got hit by a mind wipe than if you were to remove the jewel…

Archer laughed, long and hard. It wasn’t a laugh of mirth, not at all: it was mocking and cold, as if he was the real EMIYA and I was Shirou Emiya after declaring my ideals of being a hero of justice. It kinda made me wish my Ilya gambit worked, he just seemed like an asshole now.

“There are no gods. They’re all dead.” He said with finality after his laughing came to a close. “When humans pray to a higher power, nobody’s listening. And if there is, it’s not one interested in helping them. This is a fact: otherwise, I would not exist.”

“I can’t tell if that’s humanity speaking or just me, I came to that conclusion about back home a long time ago.” It only seems like a different time now, honestly. “But I must say now that I’m a Purple Heart worshiper and if you say otherwise then I don’t care if you’re all of humanity your waifu is shit.”

“I don’t have a ‘waifu’.” He made air quotes. “And no interest into arguing with myself. What I said is the truth. If you want to be pedantic, is what I believe is truth. So if you can prove me wrong, great. If not, nothing was lost.” He sighed and rested his head on his left palm, the elbow on the chair’s arm. “Continuing our early conversation, being empowered by the Counter Force revolves around a single concept: if you’re not good enough to win a fight, it makes you so. So if your enemy is faster, you become just as fast. If stronger, just as strong. If an emotional breakdown would make you vulnerable, it suppresses those emotions. During training, it makes sure improvements stick and raise the cap if you ever reach it. But if you think this makes you invincible, think again: it cannot strengthen you above what your body can handle, it cannot revive you if you die and high-speed regeneration is out of the question.”

“...So theoretically speaking,” I put my hand to my chin and my nonexistent munchkin cap on my head. “If I were facing up against someone smarter than me, would I start becoming more smarter the longer the fight goes on?”

“Only if that is related to winning the fight or surviving.” He shrugged. “And most bursts of power are only temporary.”

“But training improvements stick.” I reminded him. “So if I were to train using my wits, they’d improve by the end of it right? I mean, yeah that’s how training works but the results would probably increase faster.”

Hey don’t look at me like that, I’m just trying to find out the limits of this.

“How do you think you managed the paperwork?” He scoffed. “You’re smart enough to handle them now, if you want to get even smarter start being challenged. Otherwise, the gain is slow.”

...I thought it was just the result of having two corporate slaves as parents. My dad worked in accounting for fucks sake, accounting.

“Yeah okay just shelving that discussion for now, one- er sorry two more questions!” I pointed my finger at the man who just raised an eyebrow in response. “If you’re the positive side of humanity than is there a negative side?”

“There should be. But out opposite natures means we don’t have a way to even sense each other.”

“I can buy it.” I nodded my head sagely. “Now, my final question is… What are your questions?”

“I have only one: you’re in a position where world conquest, and thus peace, can be achieved if you play your cards right and see it to the end. So my question is-” His eyes stared into yours. “Will you?”

I stared at him. I stared at him for a long while as time seemed to blur before I finally gave my answer.

“Of fucking course.” I slammed my hand against my chest, “For the longest time I’ve just been purposeless, but now I’m going at a goal with full speed ahead. So hear me now.”

I pointed a finger at my face. “This Miyafuji's going to conquer the world, no ifs, ands, or buts about it.”

Well, I wasn't originally a Miyafuji but if sengoku jidai names can change like twenty times than why can’t I change mine?

He clapped his hands once before spreading his arms. “There you have it. That is my purpose for existing, so as long as you hold to that decision I’m satisfied.”

“Well then,” I sighed. “Time to wake up I guess?”

“If you want.” The tanned man shrugged as I began to feel light. “By the way…”

“Oh god what now.”

“Just a fair warning.” A sadistic grin crossed his face. “It’s gonna hurt.”

“Fuck yo-”

====

And then I woke up. My body feeling like a block of lead that some jack ass hammered into my head. With a groan I slowly opened my eyes…

Only to find a sleeping Himiko right in front of me.

I blinked, Himiko was still there.

“Er.” I let out only to find my throat was made of sand paper and holy shit I need a drink. “Nope. Nope nope nope.”

And with that I closed my eyes and desperately tried to force myself to go to sleep. There were many things I could deal with, this wasn’t one of them.

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Notes:

NNB: There is nothing in this chapter that isn’t exposition, I dare you to try and find something besides the Himiko scene. But anyways, announcements! Let me just…

Ahem, new format because this is an official announcement. So basically me and Alex have decided to make this story go into once a week updates due to having other things to do. Namely, we have other quests to do you know? Alex has like a gazillion of them.

But yeah if you’re a follower of Slime Hunter here on QQ than I’ll be trying to get past the prologue soon enough, been pushing that off for a bit too long. If you’re a follower of Songs of INNOCENCE back on SV (Which some of you guys surprisingly are, I’m recognizing some of my regulars as readers of this)… I make no promises.

And remember, this isn’t stealth market, it’s shameless marketing.