Thinking back and looking ahead.
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I want to type something about the fic. Updates have been slow to non-existant because, once my monetization was gone, I felt like I was finally able to take a much needed vacation from writing. My batteries are slowly recharging, and that means updates down the line.
In Act 2, I had a lot of things set up for Daisuke to wreck the world. But then Daisuke got over his issues and he rejoined Konoha in the biggest climactic let down of the century. I kind of want to go over why I think things happened that way.
Also, apologies if you guys are getting tired of me being endlessly self-critical. I'm trying to piece things together because there's stuff I need to figure out, so these are my thoughts.
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Reason 1: Plans without synergy
The big conceit of act 2 was that I wanted Daisuke to become the bad guy. In order for Act 2 to work, Daisuke had to be the antagonist.
The reason for this was simple; Daisuke was too powerful. He had a Green Lantern Ring without any drawbacks. I knew, even back when I was first writing this fic, that this was how it was going to have to be. And it was going to be fine because Naruto would become the hero and bring Daisuke back down, convince him to stay and trigger the grand reveal of Act 2's finale. Act 2 was planned and built with Daisuke being a background force spending almost all of his time working on getting home. Act 2 was meant to have Daisuke become the BBEG (from Konoha's perspective) and force Naruto on the start of his heroes journey.
Well, if you were around before the first round of rewrites, you know how this turned out. It...was bad. Really, really bad. I tried to rush through things because I was letting my critics get to me. I was hoping to address all their complaints and finally finish act 1 (which I was beyond tired of) so I could get to the point of it all.
Now, looking back on it, I was not ready to write a shift this drastic. I was neither competent enough, nor emotionally resilient enough, to write it. I was hoping to examine every potential failing of a gamer fic. Act 1 was how min-maxing can screw you over. Act 2 was how a homesick SI would do everything in his power (even though he was tilting at windmills with that) to return home. Act 3 was how the SI would react to someone else like him trying to destroy everything he cared about.
I wanted to rock the heavens of SI-dome. I wanted to rip the whole concept apart and lay bare it's concepts for the world to see and condescend down with me. What happened was that my pride brought about my downfall. I was not nearly good enough, not nearly patient enough, not nearly wise enough, attempt a deconstruction on that scale.
I cannot tell you how much I loathe my first attempt at this fic for this exact reason.
However, when I started writing Act 2, Daisuke began taking more and more of a front seat until, well, I fixed my crap. Daisuke letting go was me letting go and then...well, we come to the next part.
Reason 2: Daisuke was weak.
Daisuke, in a way, is a deconstruction of an SI. At least, in the first draft. At the time of writing, I was a lazy, good for nothing person whose only redeeming attribute was that he could write moderately well. So Daisuke...embodies that. He was lazy. He had no problem solving ability, or even initiative (hello, Charisma stat!) and he had an uncanny ability to get people to like him for no reason. The only reason Daisuke was ever a good Ninja was because of the Game System. If he didn't have the game system, its likely that he never would've even considered being a Ninja and instead would've wound up doing...something. I don't know what. But he wouldn't be a Ninja. Too much dedication, too much risk of dying. Too much not being godlike.
Now take someone like this, someone who mostly does what he's told, whose main defense mechanism is to shut people away, and give him aspirations to change the world?
You know what happens?
He gives up and goes back to whats comfortable.
Let me reiterate.
He gives up.
This was the other reason why Daisuke had to be consigned to be a background character. I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that if I focused on him for any length of time, my Daisuke as Villain paradigm would fall apart so fast I wouldn't have a fic. Its why or rather, how, Daisuke got over his stuff. Daisuke was pulled away from his support structures and soon crumbled and then wound up thinking that changing the world isn't all that good of a goal simply because he doesn't want to be in charge. He doesn't want to be in charge because he didn't have the will to actually see his designs for the world brought to fruition, didn't want to be blamed for the collateral damage his revolution would cause, didn't want to be at fault if he wound up making things worse.
Shimoda Daisuke was weak. Weak enough that a single heart to heart at the end of Act 2 would've snapped him out of villain-hood. Weak enough that he couldn't carry a story without his social issues burdening him.
Reason 3: Mitarashi Anko
Listen, the only reason Daisuke got married to Anko instead of Ino was because Daisuke is an adult in the center. A man-child, but a man. He's an adult and wants adult things from his relationships; and he saw Ino as a child. That sent all kinds of signals to me that it was wrong on every level imaginable so I...cheated. Anko was psychologically vulnerable and willing enough to give Daisuke what he needed when he really needed that emotional closeness after having spent so much time independent and walled off. Luckily for her, Daisuke was fairly benign and I would like to think they'd make a good match up. Cringe-y dialogue, sure, especially at the start (which I maintain was because they were trying to find their footing and thus was only natural; they just had no shame because there was nothing to be ashamed or bashful of - they were married for pete's sake), but a good matchup.
But ultimately; it came down to this. Daisuke wanted sex and Anko was the best match up that didn't send his conscience into a death spiral. Anko needed emotional connection and Daisuke came offering it on levels she'd never experienced before. Then you add in Ninshu and the fact that they are actually fairly compatible and you have a surprising recipe for a completely unnatural but happy and long-lasting marriage.
At least, I certainly hope so.
The main reason this was so jarring was because Hisako and Ino had much, much more screen time and Anko didn't have much characterization before suddenly being Daisuke's wife. This draft is already fixing that by setting them up early and quickly. If Hisako and Ino want to prove to Daisuke that they can be his...concubines (I don't like that word), they'll need to prove that they're adult enough to handle an adult relationship.
...come to think of it, why am I putting a harem in this fic when I find that concept so distasteful? Actually, why do I find that concept so distasteful? Mathematically, it's best for humanities gene pool. Questions for later.
Reason 4: Jashin and Shinigami.
When I abandoned the Daisuke as Villain paradigm (something I still wonder if I should've), I needed a conflict that could contend with Daisuke being a god. Enter Jashin and Shinigami. Since the three were immortal, they were always going to be at a constant stalemate. There was no winning in their conflict. Jashin decided that since Daisuke was wrecking the Tobi-Madara-Kaguya bomb he'd been poking and prodding for centuries, that he'd wreck Konoha by becoming Naruto's surrogate mentor. Honestly, I like these two, but some people mentioned that they didn't like them because they didn't see how a decisive victory was possible; I realized that, well, that was the point. When you get past a certain point, the world becomes a game and then the only thing to do when someone wins is to set up another game.
...wait, I think I might've stumbled upon why they've stuck around in the new draft. Their appearance having been sped up because I realized that a reincarnate person would be of great, almost obsessive, interest to the Shinigami and Jashin would then follow suit because it's something new and their game has hit a stalemate (their game being kind of like real world monopoly, Jashin being the only one really playing and Shinigami exclusively being the banker). So they're just waiting for things to explode and suddenly, there's the child of prophecy and...a reincarnated person slaved to a game system that warps how the world is supposed to run.
Seriously, if it weren't for Daisuke, Jashin was perfectly fine just watching Naruto plod along per canon with a smile on his face and a bucket of popcorn. But then Daisuke's very existence changed things and arguably made them worse.
Actually, making things worse somehow is a thing for a lot of my SI's. Wonder why that is?
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Thank you for accompanying me on my ramblings on the story. I still hope that one day I'll be able to finish this thing so we can all read it and enjoy it.
Until the next time.
~Fulcon
