Tandem the Spoony's Next Adventure [F/SN x CM(D&D)]

Oh man. Welp. That's the war derailed right there.

 

One action round. ONE. And now one legendary hero is dead, the other is short an eyeball, we have the best sword in the world, and barely have a hair out of place.




Also, I want Tandem to hit on Taiga. Not because I like the girl, although I do. Mostly because I think the two of them will play off of each other and be hilariously over the top without the slightest hint of shame.

 

I can't be Spoony, I'm the GM. I have to blame one of you fuckers for this.

Still; all this means is that I have to wait on the equivalent the Dungeonland incident to happen here to feel vindicated.

 

Yeah, sounds about right. Seeing as this is literally his history. Slipping up and disarming a Kensei, a guy who spent all his life refining the way of the sword IN ONE TURN. If anything, it seems that history is apt to repeat itself.

WE NEED TO MAKE CALLED SHOTS ON BERSERKER'S WEAPON ARM! :O

It'd be fucking fantastic. Taiga Tandems.

 

... y'see, Gil? This is what A+ Charisma is supposed to look like. It's supposed to make me giggle like one of Gaston's fangirls in Beauty and the Beast and cue up the Slayers' opening theme. It's supposed to make me curse the fourth wall for separating me from a guy. It's supposed to make me temporarily consider renouncing my Weatherwax-flavour naytheism.

Make a note of it, so-called Gilgamesh-King. I blow my nose at you.

 

And you just know the priest was watching the fight. I actually expect he may have had his eye's bug out after that fight. He may not feel emotion but he certainly can experience surprise. All he saw though was two servants lunging towards one unlucky SOB in the between them both, then suddenly that servants stats jump strait into EX for speed and he goes blind.

Yeah. Tandem the Spoony just had one legendary lancer kill a different legendary swordsman then he intended while stealing the swordsman's sword right from out of her hands mid strike.

Lets see what happened in one round here:
Slipped on puddle of oil
Disarmed Legendary Swordswoman
Stole sword out of mid air
Stabbed out the eye of a Legendary Lance wielder
had said wielder activate an impossible to miss attack that missed and killed the Legendary swordswoman instead of Tandem the Spoony
Completely blinded said Lance wielder & incapacitated him from pain for a little bit


Then he ran away with his anchor slung over his shoulder and headed to church.

... Yeah that is a feat worthy of Spoony.

 

[X] Scry the shed; see what the aftermath of your 'brilliant' plan is.

 

....oh shit.......can we teach Shirou Vanacian magic? Or worse (for the guys on Earth) BARDIC MAGIC!?

WE NEED TO GO DEEPER

 

Oh Gilgamesh's A+ Charisma so totally got the shaft in canon, because the King of Heroes was too busy kicking puppies. He's more Bro in Extra and CCC, or so I hear. When he's not in the antagonist role, he does live up to that Charisma.

I tend to treat Gilgamesh and his A+ Charisma as pretty scary myself. Like, "Can't keep my eyes off him, everyone else feels lesser next to him, I should hate him but unless I focus on the hate I backslide into liking him! How?!" Or the extreme popularity manifests as obsession.

Basically, a person with A+ Charisma treats the world as if it revolves around them? And it starts to do exactly that. And everyone likes it.



Actually, if you haven't seen it, here's a link to something that may interest you. Can You Chat With The King Of Heroes?

If you're not that interested in TM, don't bother. I like Gilgamesh myself, in part because he can be such a magnificent asshole. When he's against you, ya hate him. When he's on your side...surprisingly awesome!

 

The only sadness I feel from this update is the fact Tandem the Spoony won't get the chance to screw saber literally and figuratively. Well beyond what he already did to her. Seriously? Taken out of the war in 20 seconds? That has to be a record for fasted summon and kill *yet*...

 

Even Avenger lasted several days. Tsk, tsk Arturia. I guess you just didn't want to win very much~

 

That's his power.....the power to overturn destiny.....the power to elude Fate. Now how will how Shirou Stay alive this Night?

Also here is the video of Tandem the Spoony's Last Ride for the curious: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1AT_FbOR0Y

 

[X] Scry the shed; see what the aftermath of your 'brilliant' plan is.

 

... you're not exactly correcting my impression of him as a bargain-basement Dio-sama, yknow. XD

 

Gilgamesh still sucks!

 

I said that's how I write him. Sadly canon doesn't seem to give him anywhere near as much presence or put as much effort into a compelling version of that Charisma. Or interesting. I mean god damn it, it would have been soooo easy to have Gilgamesh be supernaturally compelling to everyone he meets and only sufficiently strong personalities, Saber or Iskander, or alien/distorted personalities, Shirou/Kotomine, can resist.

But going by what I know of Dio, mostly via you, I'm pretty sure there's one line in CCC that utterly torpedos that impression and proves Gilgamesh is Chaotic Good. Kinda spoilers, if you care, for CCC. I guess.

Gilgamesh is an asshole to most people because Enkidu, his BFF, the one person he considers his equal, and the person who turned Gilgamesh from an asshole who claims the right to fuck brides on their wedding night into a worthy king, is dead and gone. Incidentally, Gilgamesh hates the gods so much that his Divinity is kicked down from A+ to B.

That's a whole lotta hate.

Gilgamesh can be a great character with lots of depth if you dig. He's also really easy to use as the antagonistic asshole who is still supremely powerful for the heroes to overcome.

 

[X] Scry the shed; see what the aftermath of your 'brilliant' plan is.

 

Question: is now REALLY the time to scry when we're right in front of the backstabbing asshole of a priest who got Lancer by hacking off the Master's Command Seals? Especially when Gilgamesh is around?

Just saying, if this is the kind of thing that takes time and distracts us? Now is so not the time or place unless you want to give away info or potentially get backstabbed.

 

I thought it was a 'after the scene were we talk to the shady priest thing'. Its also possible Kerei is still semi-blue screened at a guy doofing through this encounter.

 

No. We were given a choice to talk to the moderator, go back to the shed, or scry. If we choose scry, we haven't talked to the priest and he might have time to gather his composure.

 

Oh. I was too busy noting my intense hate for Gilgamesh and the incredulous-ness of what occurred to notice the actual CHOICES. Silly me~

Yeah, going now would be good. Get that out of the way and not get Gilly involved yet....but on the other hand, I wanna see Archer gawk at Tandem....and laugh at Lancer's misfortune.

TOO MANY GOOD CHOICES!

 

[X] Check in with the administrator, might as well know the guy meant to keep things nice and tidy in the battle royale

As we all know, being friendly with the mods can make all the difference. O

 

[X] "Well, obviously this tournament has some sort of moderator! Hmm. Let's try to find him or her or other then, shall we?"

 

[X] Check in with the administrator, might as well know the guy meant to keep things nice and tidy in the battle royale

 

Looking at things; consensus seems to be tied between Scrying and Chillin' with Kotomine. I'll let things be for a couple more hours until I start asking for tie-breakers or break out the quarters.

 

I would like to point out that one is time sensitive to see what is going on(scrying), and the other really isn't(Register naow). We may have EX agility but we also stopped long enough to hold a conversation with Shirou.

 

[X]Shady priest
[X]Realize he is obviously Evil and hiding shit.
[X]Ask him flat out. Okay. What are you hiding? Grail is secretly evil? Orphans in the basement? Actually competing in this thing?

 

Ok, it looks like meeting with the Fake Priest is in the lead; roll for bluff: 1d20+140. You may cast Glibness to add on an additional +30 to your bluff if you so desire.

...This is what happens when you apply Heroic Spirit/Servant level skills to mundane people; if Kotomine were something like a DA, Elemental, or anything that can actually put up a somewhat decent fight against a Servant, the roll would be 1d20+28.