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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Then I can only suggest that you write it.
    I actually... Put a link to it in the story segment.
     
  2. Bud-E

    Bud-E Getting some practice in, huh?

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    No thnx I'm a shit writer but what was OL logic with altering Bullock did he want to help him?
     
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  3. Gilhelmi

    Gilhelmi Know what you're doing yet?

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    Then Bless and curse you as well.

    EVERYONE GETS BLESSED AND CURSED TODAY FOR I AM LAUGHING FAR TO HARD!

    YOU GET BLESSED AND CURSED,
    AND YOU GET A BLESSING AND CURSE,
    I SEE YOU BACK THERE SNICKERING AS WELL, A BLESSING AND A CURSE FOR YOU AS WELL!
    I AM THE BELOVED OPRA OF BLESSING AND CURSES TODAY!!!

    and then SB goes down for maintenance right when I was getting to another good part........ that is just a curse, they get the blessing after the site is back up.
     
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  4. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    He wanted him to go away, but wasn't prepared to hurt him. Giving him involuntary aid helped make his point.
     
  5. Bud-E

    Bud-E Getting some practice in, huh?

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    I feel like that was an extreme most people wouldn't go to or think of so yeah that sounds like OL logic to me.
     
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  6. AverusBlack

    AverusBlack AKA Sky

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    I caught this story about three years ago and I've been following it every day ever since; WTR has a dedicated, pinned tab in my browser and has for awhile now. I like stories. I've read hundreds of books by now (Granted, mostly sci-fi and fantasy but other stuff here and there as well) and few have engaged me consistently for as long as this one has.

    With that said, I've considered writing something about a character with a ring but I've been at odds about it for several months now, unable to decide whether or not to do it since this is kind of Zoat's thing. If I were to take a stab at it I think I would do it in a non-DC based universe, though not necessarily a canon franchise as seems to be the theme in this story. Also I'm bad at consistently updating things, haha.

    So, it's an open question to all; think I should go for it, or would it come across as just a ripoff or something?
     
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  7. Bud-E

    Bud-E Getting some practice in, huh?

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    Go for it
     
  8. jaelin910

    jaelin910 habitual lurker

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    Define "good terms"
     
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  9. Whiteeyes

    Whiteeyes Non Breeding Bunny

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    To amswer the questions that may exist about my own SI that is apparently now guest staring here.

    1) She has no idea about his SI because of lack of setting knowledge. She has general DC knowledge, not YJ specific.

    2) She is a very Neutral Good character. She won't break the law if she doesn't have to, as that causes more problems and issues than needed and just isn't an efficient way to go about making things better in the long run.

    3) She very very much disagrees with him, and when she said "you're not as crazy as I expected" it was not a compliment. The crazy amount is higher.

    4) I was not consulted about this at all and so haven't had any imput on how this version of Vanilla will act but I'm sharing original creator insight.
     
  10. Assblaster5000

    Assblaster5000 Know what you're doing yet?

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    Go ahead, plenty of people have done exactly the same and all of the ones I've read have been at least entertaining, and if you really want to do it no one's stopping you.

    Hell, Zoat's actually fallowed at least some of 'em in the past, so I don't think he minds all that much.
     
  11. RamiroGalletti

    RamiroGalletti Your first time is always over so quickly, isn't it?

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  12. Radix

    Radix Getting sticky.

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    It is hilarious to complain about someone else using your character when writing about a universe someone else owns.

    Last I checked, neither Zoat or this creator asked permission from Warner Bros. Nor should they imo. Art is art and people should ne allowed to tell the story they want. Especially if they arent profiting off of it.

    Even moreso because this character was created as a YJ SI lantern. That concept sounds familiar.
     
  13. AverusBlack

    AverusBlack AKA Sky

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    I suppose it would since Zoat began his story in 2013 and the one you're talking about began in 2015 according to the timestamps on the link in this thread to the teal lantern story. Noooot quite the slam dunk you probably thought that was. Also, said author has already shown up in this thread and is perfectly capable of being offended on their own behalf, you know.

    EDIT: nevermind
     
    Last edited: May 2, 2021
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  14. Radix

    Radix Getting sticky.

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    I was speaking in favor of Zoat. As far as I am aware he is the progenitor of Lantern SI fics, YJ Lantern fics in particular.
     
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  15. AverusBlack

    AverusBlack AKA Sky

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    Seemed to come off another way, sorry about that.

    It's not the first time Zoat's featured the SI in some random setting. It's usually a one or two post thing which is never spoken of ever again. And due to that post people who have literally never heard of that story now know about it where they didn't before.
     
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  16. moralrelativity

    moralrelativity Recovering pendant.

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    You wanna do it? Then go for it. Link it here and I'll give it a go.
     
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  17. AverusBlack

    AverusBlack AKA Sky

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    It's only two posts in so far. I'll add more here and there as I get bored and feel like writing.
     
  18. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    Guys? Gals? Assorted non-binaries? Can we chill? Let's not argue until Mr Zoat gets online and can respond for himself. Hopefully things work out well, and we all get to see Joyful Viera again. Worst case, Mr Zoat deep-sixes the chapter. :( It's not the first time he's revised a post after upload, as seen during Mandated. But until he logs in and sees Whiteeyes' concerns, there's no point arguing one way or the other. :oops:
     
  19. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Back when I started writing this on SpaceBattles, there was a brief period where there were dozens of Lantern SI stories that started in response to mine. I have about as much problem with that as Martin Nodell has with me.
    Sure. I didn't. I also didn't ask the creator of Inviolate about using that, or Martin Nodell about using his original character Alan Scott, or... DC in general about using their stuff.
     
  20. Threadmarks: I Smile To See You Want (part 4b)
    Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    5th July 2010
    14:36 GMT -5


    She fidgets a little.

    "I hope you're wrong."

    "Don't duck the question; this is important. It will inform how you conduct yourself going forward."

    "I just really want to fix people's homes without it being complicated!"

    "Simple enough. Work out which crime family owns the area and get their permission. It's unlikely that they'll turn down free home improvements, and they can square things with the Gotham authorities due to already controlling them."

    "I don't want to work with criminals."

    "From what I was overhearing, you're a criminal."

    "I'm not-." She considers the point and then nods confidently, her ears flapping. "I don't want to work with other criminals."

    "The Illustres of the Orange Lantern Corps once said; 'Decide what you value most, for in the pursuit of it you may be called upon to give up everything else'."

    "Well... Then-. They're an emo-jerk too!"

    Ah…

    "Not… Untrue. But it's a helpful mindset to have, when you're in a role that can require split-second decision making with lives on the line. How long have you had that ring?"

    "Not… Long. How long have you had yours?"

    "Eight years. And I've seen worlds rebuild cities in the time it would take for you to calm all the ruffled feathers you'd need to here in order to do so much as change a sparkplug while conforming to local law."

    "Ah, pardon me?" A man-. The local Bruce Wayne. My version lost the ability to maintain his mask around me years ago, but as far as this version knows I'm just another Lantern. Of all the people I didn't want to see… "I couldn't help but overhear your discussion, and I'd like to help."

    I can maintain my mask around him, because I can transfer control of my facial muscles to my ring and this version hasn't learned to spot when I do that yet. From the strange look the bunny girl is giving me it looks like her ring has picked up on the increase in anti-joy in my aura.

    A competency test, then. Does she know who he is, and does she know of his alter ego. Her eyes are glimmering, so I'm a little hopeful, but for aliens Earth's custom of masked crime fighting is often bewildering-.

    "How?"

    "My companies do a lot of construction work in Gotham. We have accredited training programs which would allow you to continue your urban improvement work without having to worry about accidentally breaking the law. Plus, you'll even get paid."

    Another glimmer, which suddenly cuts out. She's going to have to watch that.

    "Sir, are you attempting to bribe an officer of the Teal Lantern Corps?"

    "What? No!" His body language says 'mildly affronted', but he isn't wearing a ward. His emotional resonances are totally wrong. "I'm just saying you do good work and I'd like to help you out."

    "Would you?"

    "Yes, I-."

    "Because I just checked the phone records of the unions who complained about me. The first half did so after their offices received a phone call from you. And then they called their inspector friends. And now here you are, with a job offer."

    His expression becomes stern. Not a full Batman face, but the sort of fraction of Batman that sometimes leaks through when he's very tired or frustrated.

    "What are you implying?"

    "Nothing. I'm stating facts. If the facts suggest something else, then it's a conclusion the facts naturally suggest." She turns to me. "I don't think I want to stay here anymore. Clearly, I need to have a think about how I'm going to do this. Actually, Orange Lantern, do you have twenty bucks I could use? There's a few supplies I need to pick up if I'm going to stay on planet long term, and I currently have no local currency."

    "I… Do, but in the Orange Lantern Corps we say that if you're too stupid to work out how to make money with a power ring then you're too stupid to be trusted with one. I can give you a list of terminally ill rich people, if that helps?"

    "No, I've got this."

    "If you want, I can rank them by moral turpitude. Is that better? Some of them are actually quite nice."

    "No, I don’t need someone who's decided to make himself my personal shoulder devil telling me who I should save."

    "Triage is a perfectly-."

    "Teal Lantern out!"

    She shoots upwards at speed, heading in the direction of… Oh, that's not a good choice. That asteroid is mostly silica and ice. The only metal that's there in any significant quantity is copper, and while the price of copper is… Reasonable at the moment, that's still not a very time-economical target.

    "She seems nice. Let Jordan know he can contact me by ring, won't you?"

    "Who's Jordan?"

    "Good day."

    I don't step out but rather transition upwards, reappearing in the ionosphere just in time to wave at the bunny girl as she flies past.

    She gives me the finger.

    Ring, monitor her to see if she has a personal lantern.

    Compliance.

    When Hinon told me that Krona had done something to the emotional spectrum in this parallel, this isn't what I expected. Extra colours? Everything I know about the spectrum tells me that isn't possible. Some mind states are built into the structure of the universe, and others just aren't. But if he managed to do this

    If it's possible to reengineer the universe to empower other mental states, we could make rings that worked with whatever a person's 'best' emotion was. I mean, if we can learn; if he just mucked up the Big Bang a little differently here and it can only happen at the alpha event then we're stuck. But it might still be worth my time to learn how it could have been done.



    Eight years ago.

    Down there somewhere Kon is starting to learn what being a person is like. M'gann's learning to be around people who aren't disgusted by the colour of her skin. Wallace… Isn't learning to be less of an arse just yet, but that's only a few months away.

    I look up at the stars.

    The Citadelians and the Psions still exist. The Reach is still a going concern. Alstair and O are still hamstrung by their unusual technological bases. The Thanagarians are still scheming… Probably. We might be close to Universe 16 here but I can't just assume that it's all the same.

    It's not my responsibility. It's not what I'm here for.

    But as an Orange Lantern… Yes. I think I can square dealing with Larfleeze for them with myself. I miss that old ring, anyway.
     
    Last edited: Jun 4, 2021
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  21. Darko

    Darko Well worn.

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    True.

    Remove 'of'

    I really like her.

    Welp if he does that then the GLC may be able to move in and take care of the pirate problem, as well as the Citadel and Psions. Assuming they don't have a treaty with the Psions like in this stories version.
     
    Last edited: May 2, 2021
  22. Vaermina

    Vaermina Versed in the lewd.

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    So... Shouldn't the Monitors be showing up some time soon to stop his meddling?
     
  23. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
     
  24. Idkusername

    Idkusername Versed in the lewd.

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    He’s clearly jumped into a parallel universe that’s eight years behind, there’s no actual time travel going on.
     
  25. FreeGod

    FreeGod If you see a God on the road fuck it!

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    Wonder about this. I don't think that Paul had a support network in this universe to give Larfleeze therapy so when he says dealing with does he just mean kill him?
     
  26. DrThoth

    DrThoth Not too sore, are you?

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    I think the explanation for this is that Paragon has spent enough time around Batman/Bruce to accurately assess what he's actually feeling or thinking, even without empathic vision, but I could be wrong. The wording also suggests to me that Paragon specifically evokes an emotional reaction from Bruce strong enough to break through his mask, possibly related to the falling out between them that I think is still the plan for the story.

    This eight years future Paragon knows about the Thanagarian scheming, so I'm interested to see how that's going to play out in the present day.

    Does Renegade have any plans for dealing with Thanagar in any capacity? They're relatively close to Earth in terms of space polities, I believe. Maybe as part of Luthor's space goodwill tour.
     
    Last edited: May 2, 2021
  27. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    ;) Well, wouldn't you if you had some other Lantern guy wearing a ring you believed caused compulsive kleptomania, trying to stick his nose into your business? And this not long after having lunch with Batman?

    Seriously, OL. Coming on kind of strong here. I mean, she just wants to help people.

    Ah, OL? Rookie Lantern from the 'good' side of the Spectrum, the lady's not going to like that suggestion at all.

    Surprised she's putting up with him, but Vanilla did strike me as patient with the unwise.

    Ah, the ego damage. It's honestly amusing watching OL interact with another SI, even if she doesn't know his origins (As Whiteeyes said earlier.) He doesn't get to be the big guy, swinging his shit all over the place.

    Heh. There's an amusing idea. As Whiteeyes wrote her, she's not much for direct combat using the Ring. She just doesn't take Joy in it. Shields and healing, yes, very much so.

    Well, that gives us an overall position in his timeline. Well after the current day, but not so far off that he's literally embodiment-tier.

    Let's hope she doesn't point that out. But at this point, still finding her feet (awkwardly shaped as they are...) I don't think she's annoyed enough to do so...

    ...Oh. Oooh. OL doesn't realise she's an SI either. :V Well, that's amusing. I foresee him taking her comments about a Teal Lantern Corps completely seriously.

    Logical enough, though I suspect he'd arrange for Hal to pay her a visit as he did in her story's canon.

    Which is believable, given his civilian identity's philanthropic habits. Of course, to a new-to-Earth alien (as OL is seeing her...)

    :p Okay, OL should be impressed with that. Of course, then he'd decide she's jumping to entirely the wrong conclusion...

    And this is very frustrating for him, certainly. An unknown alien, running loose in his city? While YJ Batman isn't the control freak his very worst incarnations can become, he does like things orderly.

    ...Goddammit, OL. Is there something about the lady or her corner of the Spectrum that's rubbing you the wrong way? You're being very antagonistic here.

    Like that one 'Challengers of the Unknown' lady, who should still be alive, if deep in an Alzheimer's fugue.

    :confused: See what you did, OL? You upset the Joyful Bunny. Not the best start to matters.

    Geez, OL. :rolleyes: Back-seat Ring-sling, why don't you? Please, try not to disrupt the timeline more than you already have, huh?

    Boy, you are not making any friends today, OL. I know you find the Man Dressed as a Bat annoying, but he doesn't know you yet. Or are you just making the process of him not liking you that much easier? :V

    I can understand not wanting to enter the local Honden without permission - Ophidian is likely still bonded to 'the runt' as she called Larfleeze - but I can find her reaction completely reasonable.

    For the readers who haven't looked up 'I Want to See You Smile' yet, yes, she does. o_O And if you haven't, why not? It's a good read!

    Well, then. There's his mission explained in two paragraphs. Nicely expositionised, OL. Though I have the feeling it wasn't Krona that did this...

    And this time they're doing it without you. Instead, Vanilla will be working with them... Assuming you haven't derailed that with your interference.

    Yes, better not to go poking around somewhere where you might fuck it all up.

    ...What did I just say? :rolleyes: And seriously, you're going to steal his ring because you're nostalgic? Boy, time sure has changed you...

    ...Not.

    Pushing on, I see. o_O Let's hope this doesn't turn bad, in-universe and in-thread... At any rate, what would his goal here realistically be? Finding out more about Vanilla's Lantern Corps and visiting their central location in order to find out local history? Problem is they may or may not exist until Vanilla's pressed on the matter, as seen in her story. In the meantime, having an epic-level character hanging around like a sloppily-applied DMPC would really derail most of the plot-lines.


    :eek: I hate to say it, but Vaermina has a point. The Monitors' job was to restrict and minimize inter-reality travel (not time travel, that's a different problem.) On the other hand, they didn't show up during the Crisis of Infinite Pauls, when OL was flying around with several alternates. Either the Self-Insert Paul universes are their own cluster that can be considered a single parallel... Or the Monitors are not around to have a say one way or the other...
     
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  28. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    That whole concept sounds newer than the stuff I usual draw upon.
     
  29. Darko

    Darko Well worn.

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    Paul can be a dick.

    Though her patience may reach its end with Paul’s unwisdom.

    Paul, the guy that will find any reason to criticize anyone else for their reasons no matter how much his critiques are misinformed, flimsy or ill-advised.

    And anyone would be worried about this.

    He really is a douche.

    And if she heals her then she may get her mountain fortress.

    Never upset the bunny.

    He's going to disrupt it.

    Not that it's difficult for him to get someone to dislike him.

    I think he's going to go poking around.

    One of these days it's going to be less poking and more doing a Jaime Lannister and trying to stab a lady near a dragon, only to nearly be incinerated.

    Hopefully he'll have a Bronn there to save his ass.

    Now because of your obsession with Murphy it will.

    I think Hinon sent him here after discovering the other lights so they can study them.

    Or he did it himself.
     
  30. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    My source: The Monitors. Pre-flashpoint, but only really significant between Infinite Crisis and Final Crisis. They rose out of the multiversal realignment of Infinite Crisis, and were wiped out in the course of Final Crisis (By a vampire member, Mandrakk.) Which could go some way to explaining their absence here in the various Earth-16s. The only significant survivor of the group is one Nix Uotan. Let's not speak of his post-flashpoint self...
     
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