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With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by Mr Zoat, Jan 27, 2019.

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  1. BrotherofaStudio

    BrotherofaStudio Know what you're doing yet?

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    A lot more hostility at first on Slipstream's end before Paul manages to convince her on forming a partnership and the flirting arriving later on.
    If you say so, but it was just an example of how they could have prevented Seaspray from being killed if you want to prevent that from happening.
     
    Last edited: Aug 15, 2022
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  2. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Slipstream was starving to death, unable to find energon, when she entered statis lock fully expecting to never wake up again. She woke up infested with an organic, but then noticed that her tanks were full and that put her in a much better frame of mind. Plus... She'd basically taken orders with no right to refuse ever since she came on line. She's not good at setting her own direction.
     
    Last edited: Aug 15, 2022
  3. Ngamer11

    Ngamer11 Experienced.

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    I hope at some point someone points out that when it comes to Paul's love interests, the most common denominators across the multiverse are cat themed or former villain he helped rehabilitate, if not both.
     
  4. Valint

    Valint I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    For context, it probably needs to be specified that this was all pre-Crisis.

    In the 60s, there was a story arc in which Wonder Woman was depowered. The JLA writer wanted a female character to fill her slot, and liked Black Canary, so after a JSA/JLA crossover event, Black Canary literally just moved to Earth-1 and joined the JLA.

    In the early 80s, they retconned her origin so that she discovered she wasn't actually the Black Canary of Earth-2. Instead, she was that Black Canary's daughter, who had been cursed as an infant, put in suspended animation in another dimension, grew up physically there, was later recovered by her mother, and her dying mother implanted her memories in her and sent her to Earth-1.

    As one does. In comics, in the 80s, at least.

    All of that went away a few years later, when Crisis rebooted everything. So... yeah, this is weird as shit, but that was kind of one of the reasons for the original Crisis, to get away from having to do weird explanations for how certain characters from the Golden Age were still around.

    The post-1985 version is pretty standard, with the second Black Canary just being the daughter of the first one, without any shenanigans.
     
  5. AR760

    AR760 Experienced.

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    The energy argument could work. It would simply depend on how much of the Cybertronian tech-base they were able to harness before the planet became uninhabitable. And how high the energy requirements for Transformers are.

    Depending on that particular answer, you might need to build the tools to build the tools to build the tools to harness energy in the required amount, let alone convert it into something Transformers can use.

    I mean, think about it. Uranium is incredibly energy dense, yet we can not use it for energy. Neither can cars which are not designed to.

    I can see a world where it could work.
     
  6. LZB1285

    LZB1285 Getting sticky.

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    Sounds like the Transformers have either engineered/evolved themselves into what is effectively a ecological dead end. Emphasis on the dead if they are reliant upon what appears to be a manufactured substance. Or is it a case of they learnt to manufacture Energon after their population grew beyond what nature could sustain naturally.
     
  7. Pinklestia

    Pinklestia Well worn.

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    Energon, at least pure Energon, can't be artificially made without reality warping bullshit. That's why it is so common to use alternate energy sources even if it less ideal.

    Low grade (Red Energon) can be basically made from most common energy sources but it causes a lot of complications on a Transformer health, basically they break down easier, parts last less and so on.

    There is a lot of variants depending on the medium, and version of Transformers, but yeah Transformers could live of renewable energies, but I wouldn't call that living.

    Biggest problem is that Transformers need a lot of energy, hence why the Beast Wars era Transformers are smaller and more energy efficient.
     
  8. Coda

    Coda Versed in the lewd.

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    imminent

    Semicolon or full stop instead of comma.

    In both cases, comma or colon instead of semicolon.

    Vaermina is contrarian to a fault, but he isn't breaking any rules. "Annoyance" isn't a bannable offense; that's why there's an ignore function.
     
  9. Someguy Somewhere

    Someguy Somewhere The Critical Fumbler

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    [​IMG]
     
  10. Senevri

    Senevri Not too sore, are you?

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    *Glances at modern fertilizers*
    Yeah, that seems like there might be some additional risks there.
     
    Last edited: Aug 15, 2022
  11. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Meaning 1. Inherent, not soon to be.
    Thank you, corrected.
    That's not a language change. That's an edit. The version on the left is fake.
     
  12. BrotherofaStudio

    BrotherofaStudio Know what you're doing yet?

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    That does explain things and you make a good point about her taking orders.
     
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  13. Someguy Somewhere

    Someguy Somewhere The Critical Fumbler

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    Right you are, my apologies for propagating the gag.
     
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  14. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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  15. Coda

    Coda Versed in the lewd.

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    All right. It's a pun that nobody is going to notice if spoken aloud, but hey, this is text.
     
  16. PDV

    PDV Revelation That Uncertainty Is Itself An Answer

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    Plenty of nonsense left elsewhere in her story, though. Like early Black Canary - forget whether this was mother or daughter - actually not being blonde or femme, that was a wig and makeup. She was in fact extremely butch, "normally" wearing a crew cut of black hair. In a few issues she ditched the disguise and kept the full outfit, going from "just walked out of a fetish club complete with collar" to "clearly a pro domme".

    [​IMG]

    Black Canary is... not as much a blatant kinks-on-the-page as Wonder Woman. But as you know, that is faint fucking praise. (It goes places.)
     
    Last edited: Aug 16, 2022
  17. Someguy Somewhere

    Someguy Somewhere The Critical Fumbler

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    Of course....I got the wrong universe for the dong joke. Clearly need to go back to nerd school for some remedial classes.
     
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  18. Threadmarks: Feasibility Study (part 9)
    Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    21st November 2012
    08:29 GMT -5


    Silver-grey appears to be the JSI's uniform colour of choice. Particular designs vary, personal icons are allowed and the uniforms may be more or less armoured. Not sure whether that's-.

    I stop for a moment, exhaling quietly.

    **Brainwave, I can hear you perfectly well.**

    There's no verbal response, but I notice that what I'm seeing starts to trigger fewer memory connections.

    **And I noticed that as well. I'm not going to be annoyed-.**

    Interceptor glares at me. "Do you need the bathroom?"

    "No, I'm just having a word with Brainwave Two. You would not believe how long the Justice League went without telepathic security scans."

    "'Justice League'?"

    "Our Justice Society shut down in the fifties." At the front of the column, Commander Scott glances back with a small nod. "The Justice League is the organisation that does the equivalent job now."

    I feel a subtle probe-.

    **I'm being polite by asking. Is there something you're looking for in particular, or do you want me to eject you forcibly?**

    Commander Scott glances back again as we approach his office. "Give Brainwave a break, Lantern. He's doing his job."

    His eyes go slightly blank for a moment, and my mind returns to baseline performance levels.

    "I'm linked to a powerful elemental. Last time she felt a hostile mind connected to mine, she ate it. I'm not threatening him, I'm warning him."

    Oliver shrugs. "If it makes him feel any better, I didn't feel a thing."

    Commander Scott stops outside of a secure door, two cybernetically augmented soldiers standing guard. I see their eyes flicker, presumably as they perform identification checks. Then they stand aside and the door opens.

    Wait a.. moment.

    I stop in front of one of the cyborgs, allowing my empathic vision to open up a little.

    I smile at him. "Ah, I see what they did wrong."

    "Sir?"

    "The feeling of disassociation. They've rigged you up as if you had a lateralised brain, but you don't. As a result, half your body is lagging slightly. Your processor's trying to adapt, but you're subconsciously aware of the slight extra load. Want me to fix it?"

    "A-?"

    He's clearly surprised, his eyes darting first to the other soldier and then to his Commander. But his communications implants are also lighting up, so I assume that he's also using the proper channels.

    "Corporal, you're relieved. Report for decontamination. Lantern, after we're done, write up what you think you found-"

    A folder precipitates out of thin air and I pass it to the corporal.

    "-and hand it over to our medical team. Corporal, hand it over before decon."

    "Yes, Commander."

    He takes a firm grip of the folder and marches off down the corridor.

    The Commander fixes me with a stone stare. "Stop scanning my soldiers."

    "That wasn't-. Not all of my abilities need a ring. I'd need a magic blindfold to stop looking at people."

    "Just get in the office. Interceptor, you're with us."

    He heads in, the rest of the party having already filed through. Alan's looking at a picture on his desk with a frown, while the rest have found seats-.

    Oh no. That's a picture of Commander Scott with Molly Mayne, Jade and Obsidian. Alan's… Looking at Molly's face.

    Commander Scott walks around to his side of the desk, clearly spotting what's holding his alter-ego's attention. A moment later Alan realises that the Commander is looking at him and switches his attention to his doppelgänger.

    "You remarried?"

    "You didn't?"

    "No, I-. I always hoped Rose would snap out of it."

    Commander Scott nods, as if that makes sense to him. "My Rose was dead. And I still left it for a good long time before marrying Molly."

    "Hm."

    Interceptor remains standing at parade rest behind the chair line. I ignore the spare chair and generate a construct to sit on instead.

    Commander Scott takes a moment to make eye contact with each of us. "So you were trying to get somewhere else. Where?"

    "Earth Six Six Six." Commander Scott narrows his eyes interrogatively at Alan. "I know, I know. They got taken over by demons a while ago, and…" Alan glances at me. "Paul and.. some allies of his went over and got rid of them. One of their people ended up in our Earth, so we're going to make sure things are okay there before sending her back."

    "Is Earth Six Six Six any threat to you, or to us?"

    "It was. One of their demon cults was invading at least one other parallel that I know of. But we shut that down, and the survivors are busy sticking their planet back together. Or, were, when I left."

    Commander Scott nods. "Do you think something went wrong with your portal?"

    "N-"

    Oliver puts his right fist over his mouth. [cough]"Yes."[/cough]

    "-o, it doesn't seem likely, if only because the individual who built it wouldn't have any reason to send us here. But there are ways to interfere with inter-parallel travel, and I suspect that's what we ran into."

    "You mind sharing that technology?"

    "The shield?" He nods. "No problem at all, though I should warn you that it can be bypassed."

    I raise my left hand, and a binder containing the technical specifications appears on his desk.

    He nods. "As far as I know, there's no equivalent technology, or.. research that could lead to the development of that technology, on our Earth. We'll do a check just in case, but I doubt that the problem is with us."

    I generate a construct hand and poke John with it.

    "Whu-? Oh. No, I know we're supposed to be here but I don't know why. I can go for a wander if our hosts don’t mind..?"

    Commander Scott frowns at Alan, who shrugs. "Wizard."

    "Oh." He turns to John. "You can't go anywhere unescorted, but we can find someone who can do the job. If you don’t have any better ideas, the rest of you can work with our science team on your problem. We don’t like people dropping in unannounced any more than you like being here."

    Nods from the Leaguers. But I don't think I'd really add anything. I might have records of super science, but that doesn't mean that it's my field. On the other hand, if I'm trying to earn points with the locals to defray suspicion…

    "Actually, if you don't need me, I was wondering if you wanted me to have a poke at the Dominators for you?"
     
    Last edited: Aug 16, 2022
  19. PepeTheFrog

    PepeTheFrog Not too sore, are you?

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    Paul: accidentally solves another parralel Earth's problems without causing mass chaos
    Earth-16: why can't you do that for us?
     
  20. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    "thin air"

    You can see the problem with this one.

    "something went"
     
  21. Doccer

    Doccer I trust you know where the happy button is?

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    Because I'm the main character. If I solve all my home universes problems without follow up problems people will stop reading me and prove Ambush Big right!
     
  22. Radix

    Radix Not too sore, are you?

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    They just need to go ask him. Most of his chaos comes when he is left to his own devices and stumbles into things and causes a mess because he doesn't have all the info.

    But whenever someone comes to him to get help he does his due diligence as it he is doing a service for someone else and he tends to make sure he does a job well.
     
  23. Mr Zoat

    Mr Zoat Dedicated ragequitter

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    Thank you, corrected.
    Do you have a better way to indicate that he coughed?
     
  24. Radix

    Radix Not too sore, are you?

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    I am fine with them having other forms of energy. But it requires significant power as Energon is very effective as fuel. It would likely also require sophisticated tech to adapt and power up and take longer to fuel up.

    So in my mind they don't like the long downtime to refuel, plus it not feeling as "filling" as real energon. The difference between bare subsistence and real living.
     
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  25. Bloodalchemy

    Bloodalchemy Versed in the lewd.

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    Because other parallels only know him as Orange Illustres so have no issues treating him as an expert. Earth-16 knows him as crazy cake man, so he gets doubt and hesitation.
     
  26. Pinklestia

    Pinklestia Well worn.

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    In G1 Transformers both turned fuel into low grade energon cubes, in the cartoon, or took it directly as fuel in vehicle mode in the comics and basically converted to a type of fuel they could use.

    Energon is better but Red Energon is shit, the only reason to use it is if you have nothing better.

    Not only you need much more with low grade, you also need more tune ups and maintenance if all you got is low grade.
     
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  27. Chojin Patriarch

    Chojin Patriarch Veteran Lurker

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    I suppose it helps give their teams a stronger visual cohesion, but is such a security hole. All someone wanting to infiltrate would need to do is doll themselves up in the appropriate colours, and claim to be from a remote site. Then again, they've probably considered that.

    Ah, there's one of their security systems, then. Telepathic scans, and not particularly polite ones.

    I'll give her this, she's sassy. I guess now that someone higher-up is in charge, she can relax a bit.

    I know, not quite as friendly as 'Justice Society'. But it's a product of its time.

    Though the League isn't nearly this organised, sadly. They really need to work on getting a UN-backed support organisation of their own or something

    Heh, he probably just got a brainful of Henry complaining about the 'orange guy'.

    I mean, she's not directly in this universe, but safer to assume there's something still linking her, just in case.

    ...Yes, that's not worrying at all. I can hope they're ex-military, mustered out due to injuries on deployment... Or volunteers.

    And there he goes again, fixing things.

    I suppose we can't fault him for following his nature. If he sees something broken, he just has to fix it...

    ...Even if those he's 'fixing' might not want him to.

    Amazing what a working Ring VI can do for you, hmm, Commander?

    :D Upside: Rest of the day off. :( Downside: spending it in lock-down and testing...

    ...Believe me, you'll know if he's scanning stuff.

    I do hope they don't hold the actions of people who can't or won't control their innate abilities against them...

    What could have been, eh? No doubt the kids are valued and well-loved heroes?

    Something 'our' Alan didn't do. Amazing what a single decision can do.

    Sadly... :oops:

    Such is the nature of alternate universes. A single decision creates a whole leg in the Trouser of Time.

    Heh. I can see his line of thought. 'Bad enough we have to deal with space aliens. Now interdimensional ones?'

    ...Not anymore. Mostly because they're focused on rebuilding.

    ...I know that's a typo, but given the likelihood of John inadvertently messing with the transit...

    ...And Ollie clearly believes that too.

    I think the League (and Doctor Sivana) might object to giving you trans-dimensional travel capabilities... But blocking them? Easy.

    No digital copy? Then again, who knows what their informational sciences are like here.

    ...What, you don't have a Doctor Sivana running around? Or was he incarcerated very early in his career?

    Ah, another one whose local alternate is probably sitting in jail, if he exists at all.

    You're going to suggest something drastic, aren't you?

    OL, No.

    I think poking the Dominators might be a bad idea, but the episode's got to have some action, doesn't it? And better he be fighting the bad people rather than getting into some boneheaded local argument. Heck, with the right preparation, he might even be able to locate some of the Humans they took... That'll give him a hell of a diplomacy bonus to further interactions with JSI...



    But we shut that down, and the survivors are busy sticking their planet back together.
     
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  28. BR549

    BR549 This is filth! FILTH!!

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    The episode is still young.
     
  29. Darko

    Darko Connoisseur.

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    I think thet might on occasion.

    Unless this Alan didn't want them to become superheroes due to it not being all glitz and glamor.

    If it's a version of Constantine then he's probably in super jail.
     
  30. Stsword

    Stsword Versed in the lewd.

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    In the comics, the Heywood corps are indeed all volunteers.

    Of course, for anyone who remembers my earlier comment about manipulating people, take a wild guess who did a massive propaganda campaign to convince healthy young people that chopping off perfectly serviceable body parts is like the most heroically patriotic thing one can do?

    And honestly I'm not sure why they bother.

    They have their Amazo-Sentinels and they have Doc Magnus churning out Metal Marines.

    So machine firepower they have covered.

    It's not like they haven't had over fifty years to mess with the Garrick formula or miraclo.

    Ted Grant (Edit- Oops, I meant Ted Knight, too many Teds in the JSA!) being disgraced might explain why they don't have troops with star rods or cosmic converter belts.

    Oh that reminds me Paul might get a new superserum to play with- the Felis Serum.

    Trinity Catwoman is a real furry, she turned Catman into DC's answer to Sabretooth, and herself into a were-panther basically.
     
    Last edited: Aug 16, 2022
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